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30 Day Project Summary – January

This month, I had two 30 Day Projects: Get up at 5am and read to my kids before bed every night.

Getting up at 5 wasn’t as hard as I had feared. I’ve never been a morning person, but this was nice.  I got a chance to wake up slowly, catch up on the world, make breakfast and get to work without feeling rushed.  Those are all good things.   I missed twice.  The first time, I rolled over to get out of bed and didn’t make it.  Somehow, I got stuck halfway through rolling over.    The second time, I was up until after 2AM talking with my wife.  I won’t give up that kind of quality time.  When the alarm went off at 5, I gave myself two more hours.

The really interesting part, at least to me, is that I didn’t go to bed earlier most nights.   This actually added an extra 90 minutes to my day. I’m going to keep this habit up.  I may not be as firm about it every day, but it’s going to be my regular habit.  No more snooze alarm, no more wasting half of my day in bed.

Reading to the kids was harder.  Wrestling season started this month, which means we spend a lot more time chasing around to get our 10 year old where he needs to be.  After the first week, the bedtime requirement went out the window.  I decided to read to the girls whenever there was time, which made it work better.  We chose practicality over strictly adhering to the letter of the goal.  Over the course of the month, I missed 5 nights which isn’t too bad.

“Get a book” has turned into one of my girls’ favorite things to hear.  They both run giggling for the bookshelf.  It’s quiet time.  It’s quality time.  It’s teaching them to enjoy one of my favorite activities.    Never turn down an opportunity to read to a child. It may be the only time they sit still all day and the experience will stick with both of your forever.   The little things matter. A girl’s head on each shoulder and a book in front of us is something is something I will treasure forever and something that I am going to work to continue.   I only have a few more years before they are reading on their own and won’t need Daddy for this anymore.

What’s in it for me?

Fez (video game)
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Lately my son has been in full-on greed mode. It seems like every time I talk to him he asks me to give him something buy him something, do something.

“Dad, can you buy me a Yu-Gi-Oh card?”

“Dad, can you buy me a videogame?”

“Dad, can I get this?”

“Dad, can I get that?”

That is really kind of obnoxious. My response has turned into “What’s in it for me?”

Really, he’s constantly asking for stuff and he’s trying to provide no value back.  What kind of lesson would I be teaching him by handing him everything he’s asking for?  So, I’ve decided to make him come up with a value proposition: “What’s in it for me?”

Now, when he asks me to buy him a video game, I ask what’s in it for me.

Sometimes, he comes back with “Well nothing, you just love me.” That is garbage.  I’m not going to buy him stuff just as because I love him and teach them that you can buy someone’s affection or that you should be paying for someone’s affection.

Other times he comes back with “If you buy me video game, I will clean all of the poop out of the backyard.” (We have a dog.  I’m not messy.) That seems like a much better deal.

Other times, he reminds me that I owe him back-allowance.  That one’s a given.  If I owe him more than whatever he is asking for, he’s going to get it.

Sometimes, he’ll say that he willing to do a bunch of extra chores or something, but he is learning that he needs to trade value for value instead of assuming that every whim he’s got is going to be indulged by me just because I’m his parent and I’ve been generous in the past.

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