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Medical Costs and Choices

Finance, Parenting

In reality I do have a latent esophoria.
Image via Wikipedia

I’m not a bad father.

Last spring, we noticed my son had a wandering eye.  One of his eyes would just drift when he was looking at something.    It was happening consistently, so we brought him to the eye doctor.    After an exam, we found out that his eyes were 20/100.  The doctor said that getting him classes may be enough to fix the wandering eye problem.  The theory was that his eye was drifting because his eyes weren’t able to focus.   Bringing the world into focus could have let his eyes train themselves to work right.

Nine months with glasses later, the problem hasn’t gone away, so we went back to the eye doctor.

He’s got alternating exotropia.    His eyes aren’t working well together.  One eye will focus, and the other will drift. So now we’re looking into vision therapists.

A friend went through something similar with his kid, so I asked him for the name of the doctor he used.  He gave it to me and told me the clinic was the best in the business, and I would be paying for that.   I asked about the cost and was handed the doctor’s spiel about how sad it is that parents focus more on the cost of care than getting the best possible care.

What a load of crap.

First of all, that’s a sales pitch. Of course the doctor is going to defend his prices.  If his prices are exorbitant(I don’t have a basis for comparison) and he can’t defend them, people will go elsewhere.  $3000 isn’t pocket change.  That’s a significant chunk of change.  Refusing to look at your options is irresponsible.

Second, price does not equal quality.   There are a ton of things that are overpriced garbage.   Not only do scam artists abound, but some legitimate  things are are horribly overpriced at one location and reasonably priced at others.  To stay on the vision theme, my $10 glasses are every bit as high quality as any $400 pair I’ve ever owned.   The difference between generic and brand-name drugs?  The label and the price.   The FDA requires they be chemically identical to be sold.    If you insist on the brand name because it’s “better”, you are flushing your money down the toilet.  If you live by “you get what you pay for” you are guaranteed to get ripped off.

Third, balancing cost and treatment doesn’t mean I care less.   Yes, I am killing my debt as fast as I can right now.  Even when I was willing to use a credit card, I wouldn’t drop $3000 without considering my options. I have an entire family to consider, not one problem that my kid doesn’t even notice.  Grr.  I hate getting told–implicitly or otherwise–that I am a bad parent because I don’t choose to waste my money the way other people do.    I’ll check out my options first, thank you.

Now, I will pay for the best when it is warranted.    My wife wants Lasik and mentioned some sale some company was having.   No.  The guy sticking a laser and a scalpel in my eye will not be the lowest bidder.   When I left the gene pool, I went to one of the top guys in the state for the procedure.   When those things screw up, it’s permanent.

Vision therapy?  Not so much.  If it comes to surgery, we’ll go with the best.   But it’s not there, yet.  My kid is going to get a series of eye exercises, no matter where we go.  Even if I go to some back alley vision therapist with a degree from a Nigeria U, what’s the worst case scenario?  We may have to try someone else.    Since I will be doing a bit more research than that, odds are better that my kid will get exactly the same therapy regimen for 1/4 of the cost.   That’s the difference between a perfectly competent doctor and a perfectly competent doctor who convinced some trade magazine to write him up as the best in the business.

What do you think?  Am I neglecting my kid by wanting to save some money for his braces, too?

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Selling Your Car

Finance

English: Jalopy car in Joshua Tree National Pa...

English: Jalopy car in Joshua Tree National Park in Hidden Valley Campground (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When it’s time to replace your car, most people focus on the new car, instead of the old, but that is ignoring real money.  Your old car–unless it has disintegrated–still has value.  Sometimes, it’s just time to ask yourself, “When should I sell my car?”

When you’re looking to sell your car (like with We Will Buy Your Car), you generally have several options:

  1. Tow & crush. If your car has been wrecked, doesn’t run, or is just old and beat up, you may be stuck with calling a junkyard and accepting $50 for them to pick up your car and crush it for scrap.
  2. Trade it in. This is probably the least hassle, but–other than #1–doesn’t pay well.  Dealerships are willing to pay something under what they will get at a wholesale auction, which is quite a bit less than the blue book value.
  3. Sell it yourself. Now you’re thinking, “He’s going to buy my car! Oh, bother.”  It can be a pain, but it’s also the best way to get a decent price for your wheels.

When you sell your car, there are a few things to keep in mind, much like when you sell something on Craigslist.

  • Don’t be alone. There are bad people in the world, but they don’t like witnesses.  Bad things are much less likely to happen if you have company.
  • Know your price. Specifically, know three price: your dream price, the price that would make you happy, and the absolute lowest price you are willing to accept.  Make sure you figure these numbers out ahead of time.  Know what you are comfortable with before it comes time to close the deal.
  • Check IDs. The buyer is going to want to test-drive your car.  That’s fine, but you want to make sure you know who is driving off in your car.  “Officer, Sumdood took my car.  He was wearing jeans.”  That won’t get your car back.
  • Clean it up. Get the car detailed before you show it to a potential buyer.   A sparkling-clean car will almost always bring in a few hundred extra dollars.  It’s well worth the expense.

Following this plan should make the sale go as smoothly as possible and bring you the most possible money.

Readers, what have you done to dispose of an old car?

This is a sponsored post written to provide some insight into the world of used car retail.

 

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Make Extra Money: A Niche Site Walkthrough

Make Extra Money Part 1: Introduction

Right now, I have 7 sites promoting specific products, or “niche” sites.  When those products are bought through my sites, I get a commission, ranging from 40-75%.  Of those sites, 5 make money, 1 is newly finished, and 1 is not quite complete.   I’m not going to pretend I’m making retirement-level money on these sites, but I am making enough money to make it worthwhile.

Make Extra Money Part 2: Niche Selection

These three topics have been making people rich since the invention of rich.   Knowing that isn’t enough. If you want to make some money in the health niche, are you going to help people lose weight, add muscle, relieve stress, or reduce the symptoms of some unpleasant medical condition?   Those are called “sub-niches”.

Making Extra Money Part 3: Product Selection

My niches site are all product-promotion sites.  I pick a product–generally an e-book or video course–and set up a site dedicated to it. Naturally, picking a good product is an important part of the equation.

Make Extra Money Part 4: Keyword Research

If you aren’t targeting search terms that people use, you are wasting your time.  If you are targeting terms that everybody else is targeting, it will take forever to get to the top of the search results.  Spend the extra time now to do proper keyword research.   It will save you a ton of time and hassle later.  This is time well-spent.

Make Extra Money, Part 5: Domains and Hosting 

In this installment, I show you how to pick a domain name and a website host.

Make Extra Money, Part 6: Setting Up a Site

A niche site doesn’t amount to much without, well, a site.   In this installment, I show you how I configure a site, from start to finish.

Make Extra Money, Part 6.5: Why I Do It The Way I Do It

Several people have asked me to explain why I use the plugins and settings I use.  This explains the “Why” behind Part 6.

More to come….

 

 

 

 

How to Die Well

Finance

A "refusal of treatment" form from o...
Image via Wikipedia

Most people don’t die quickly.

As much as I would rather die suddenly–while putting a smile on my wife’s face–the odds are that I will spend my last hours or days in a hospital, unable to make the decisions about my care.

Will I be doing my vegetable impression after a car accident, or be left unable to speak during a botched Viagra implanantation in my 90s?  I don’t know.

There is one thing I know about the end of my life.  I do not want to linger for months, blind and deaf, on a feeding tube.   I don’t want my family to spend the last few months of my life secretly ashamed of hoping for my burden to end.   I’d like my end to be quick enough that the emotions they are feeling aren’t a sad combination of guilt and relief, just sadness at my passing and happiness at having had me.

That’s the legacy I’d like.

The problem is making my wishes known.  If I’m lying in a hospital bed, asking to be allowed to die, they’ll consider me suicidal instead of rationally considering my request.  If I’m completely incapacitated, I won’t even be able to ask.

I can certainly make my wishes known beforehand, but how will my family be able to communicate my desires to the doctors in charge and how will they convince the doctor that they aren’t just after my currently imaginary millions?

That’s where a living will comes in.   A living will, also know as an advanced directive, is simply a formal document that explicitly states what you want to happen to you if you are too out of it to make your wishes known.

Aging With Dignity has put together an advanced directive called Five Wishes that meets the legal requirements for an advanced directive in 42 states.

The Five Wishes are:

1.  Who is going to make decisions for you, if you can’t?   For me, the obvious choice is my wife.  She appears to like me enough to want me around and love me enough to do what needs to be done, even if it’s difficult.  On the chance that we end up in the same car accidents, matching vegetables on a shelf, I’ve nominated my father for the unpleasantness.   I don’t think I’ve told him that, yet.

2.  What kind of treatment do you want, or want to refuse?  When my Grandpa was going, he made sure to have a Do Not Resuscitate order on file with the nursing home, the clinic, and the hospital.  He knew it was his time and didn’t want to drag it out.

3.  How comfortable do you want to be?   Do you want to be kept out of pain, at all costs, even if it means being drugged into oblivion most of the day?  Do you want a feeding tube, or would you rather only receive food and fluids if you are capable of taking them by mouth?

4.  How do you want to be treated?   Do you want to be allowed to die at home?   Do you want people to pray at your bedside, or keep their religious views to yourself?  Some people want to be left alone, while others are terrified of dying alone.   This wish also covers grooming.   Personally, if I soil myself, I’d like to get cleaned up as soon as possible.   I’ll have enough to deal with without smelling bad, too.

5.  What do you want your family to know?  This includes any funeral requests you have and whether you’d like to be cremated, buried, or both, but also goes beyond them.  Do you want your family to know that you love them?  You can also take this section to ask feuding family members to make peace or ask them to remember your better days, instead of the miserable few at the end.

The last 3 wishes are unique to the Five Wishes document, but they are excellent things to include.   The most important part of advanced directive is the advanced part.    You have the right to want whatever works for you, but your wishes don’t matter if nobody knows about them.

How about you? Do you have a living will?  Does your family know what you want to have happen if the worst happens?

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The Happy Challenge

Life

Watch this video.


Done?

Great.

For the cheaters, the part I am most interested in is the bit about reprogramming your brain for happiness.   Studies are showing that you can rewire yourself to be happier by doing happy things.

The science is sound.  Good things trigger a dopamine reaction.  Your body likes dopamine, so you start craving the things that make it happen, which all happen to be good things.  As you suffer dopamine withdrawal, you become driven to do what it takes to get your fix.

The process is similar to heroin withdrawal, with no downside.

Hugging your kids(assuming you like them) triggers the reaction.  So does sex, successes at work, and beating a video game.

The specific plan mentioned in the video is to write down three things that you are grateful for, once per day, for 21 days in a row.  That will begin the self-reinforcing training that can get you hooked on being happy.

That’s a win. 75% of job success is predicted by your attitude.  You are 31% more productive when you are happy.  You’re also more fun to be around.

That’s a win.

Here’s my challenge:

For the next 21 days, do it.  Write down 3 thing you are grateful for.  What makes you happy?  It’s okay if it’s hard.  If it’s hard for you, you need it more than most.

Now, the truly hard part:

Fill out this form every day.  Your answers can be as long or as short as you’d like, but there has to be 3 new things every day for 21 days.  We’re going to train your brain to look for the positive, so you can’t give me 63 things on day 21.  3 things, 21 days.

On day 22, tell me how the previous 3 weeks have been.

When it’s over, I’ll hold a drawing for everyone who completed the challenge.   Not everyone will see this immediately, so I’m going to run the challenge until May 15.    That means you have until April 24th to get started.

3 answers per day means three prizes.  I’ll give away a total of $250 to three lucky participants.   That’s a $125 prize, a $75 prize, and a $50 prize, but you have to obey the rules.  3 things, 21 days in a row.

Be happy.  I dare you.