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Nigella Lawson and the High Cost of divorce

Celebrities

Nigella Lawson Eats A Banana
Nigella Lawson Eats A Banana (Photo credit: Kaptain Kobold)

Heartache and heartbreak are hard enough to endure but imagine having to go through the loss of a relationship while the world looks on. Such is the high price of celebrity divorce and the latest victim is the beautiful and talented television chef, Nigella Lawson. Shocking photos of Nigella apparently being choked by her husband, Charles Saatchi, surfaced in the media following the June 9th dinner at Scott’s restaurant in Mayfair, London, where the incident occurred. Saatchi’s advisors urged him to humble himself and admit a public apology for the assault. Saatchi denied any wrongdoing, saying he never assaulted her and in fact, was actually removing mucous from his wife’s nose. Nigella was stunned by the admonition of “nose-picking” and his refusal to apologize. She left Saatchi and their family home in Chelsea.

The two sides continued to disagree about the pictures; Saatchi claiming it was just a “playful tiff” and Lawson hurt and humiliated by the public’s assumption of her as victim of domestic violence and her husband as her tormentor. Insult was added to injury on July 7th, when Saatchi announced his intent to divorce his wife in the media instead of directly to her. Lawson, who had been waiting for a public apology, was blind-sided by his cruel divorce announcement. Lawson and Saatchi have been married for 10 years; Saatchi has claimed that the couple had become “estranged” the last few years. Saatchi claims that he had no choice but to act publicly since his wife “failed to defend” him with a statement to the media. In fact, Lawson has remained silent at the advice of her publicist so as not to further affect their children. Lawson (53) and Saatchi (70) have three teenage children from previous marriages that they were raising together.In addition to the “he said, she said” controversy, Lawson and Saatchi will have to fight over $150 million in shared assets, including their $12 million Chelsea, West London home. Both brought substantial assets into the marriage. Charles Saatchi is worth $100 million from the high-profile, highly-successful New York advertising firm, Saatchi and Saatchi. Nigella Lawson is a celebrity chef, bestselling author and television star with a net worth of $15 million. By the time lawyers for both sides duke it out in court and attempt to untangle the shared assets, those net worths will be considerably less.But it’s not just a monetary cost to this celebrity divorce. Saatchi had grown increasingly resentful of his wife’s high-profile career that he helped established. It’s a common theme in celebrity couples; one partner becomes the higher earner or the more recognized celebrity and the other gets bit by that green-eyed monster, jealousy. In Nigella’s case, there is the public humiliation at the hands of someone she loves to endure. It seems that Saatchi is determined to do whatever he can to make her suffer in the media. And then there are the children; children always suffer in a divorce. It can be lessened when parents work together to keep it private and amicable. But it’s incredibly painful to have your lives dragged through the media. In this case, it is Nigella and Saatchi’s children that are paying the ultimate price.

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Link Roundup

Misc

Wrestling season is finally over.    Q1 is always such a busy time in my house.   Now, spring has sprung and it’s time to start enjoying the weather.

On to the links.

Finance:

Here’s an intro guide to settling IRS debts.

Only someone who’s never had to deal with the full default process could think this was a good idea.  The Department of Education outsources its collections for a reason.  Eliminating private lenders will raise the students’ costs and eliminate options for troubled debtors.  Yes, I worked in the industry for several years.

The Guide to Buying Glasses Online.   I currently have 6 pairs of glasses that cost me  a grand total of $150, with no loss in quality.

PenFed:  Credit cards done right.

Not finance:

This is the coolest picture I’ve seen this year.  Space pics for under $1000.  NASA could take lessons, I think.

I miss the days when napping was possible.

38 Random Acts of Robyn. I’m thinking about incorporating this as a 30 day project.

Lawdog has a great idea to fix the problems with our legislature.  It’s a beautiful Constitutional Amendment.  If they have to play by the rules they set, the might start setting better rules.

“Only excepting such limited protection as offered by Article One, Section Six, Congress is hereby prohibited from exempting its Members from each, any, and all effects, duties or obligations rendered upon any citizen, or citizens, by any Law, Tax, or other action passed by Congress.”

Insane Incentives

Parenting

Spring is in the air.

Standardized Test
Standardized Test (Photo credit: biologycorner)

At my son’s school, that means it’s time for the Minnesota Comprehensive Assessment tests.  These are the standardized tests created by the No Child Left Behind Act that determine if a school is doing its job in educating children.  If too many kids have lousy scores, the school gets put on the “Adequate Yearly Progress” list and will eventually get penalized financially.

That creates a perverted incentive in the school system.   The main metric for a publicly-funded school’s success in Minnesota is the MCA.  If a school can churn out illiterate trench-diggers, they will get increased funding as long as the test scores are good.

For a full two weeks before this test, the school effectively shut down the education program to prepare for the MCA test.   That’s two weeks of studying for a set of standardized tests that focus on reading, writing, and arithmetic.  I’m a fan of schools prioritizing the three Rs over other subjects, but that’s not what they did.

They spent two weeks studying testing strategies, not the material contained in the test.

In science class, they covered essential scientific elements like “Answer all of the easy questions first, so you can go back and spend time on the hard ones later.”

Spanish class covered verb usage similar to “When the time is almost out on the test, answer ‘C’ for all of the hard questions you have left, que?”

They weren’t being educated, they were learning the most effective way to solve a test to gain funding for next year.

For 2 weeks.

That’s not reading practice, or reviewing the parts of speech, or covering the necessary math skills.   It’s “This is a #2 pencil.  This is a circle.  Practice until lunch.”

Is this really what NCLB was trying to accomplish?   Standardized tests to measure school proficiency should be a surprise.   Let’s randomly send in test proctors to take over a school for a day and see what the kids have actually learned.

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Indio Downey: The Cost of Drug Addiction

Celebrities

Indio Falconer Downey, the son of actor Robert Downey Jr., was arrested Sunday, June 29, 2014 on drug possession charges. At the time of his arrest, Indio was a passenger in a vehicle that was stopped around 2 PM. At the time of the traffic stop, Indio was found to have what appeared to be cocaine as well as a smoking pipe. He posted bail around 9 PM that evening and was released.

Actor Robert Downey Jr. photographed by the Ca...
Actor Robert Downey Jr. photographed by the California Department of Corrections (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Father’s Drug Problems

Indio’s father had many well-publicized drug addiction problems throughout the 1990s, attending a number of rehab facilities in an attempt to beat his drug addiction. The 49-year old actor says he was introduced to drugs by his father at the age of eight, and by 20 was a full-fledged addict. Just two years after Indio was born in 1994, the actor was stopped by police driving his Porsche on Sunset Boulevard naked and in possession of cocaine, heroin and a .357 Magnum. Just days before he was due to be charged for those crimes, he was arrested after being found passed out in a neighbor’s home. Indio’s father spent 12 months in prison and, in 2000, when Indio was six, Robert Downey Jr. was arrested in a Palm Springs hotel room with cocaine and wearing a Wonder Woman Costume. Before a preliminary hearing could be held on the charges, Indio’s father was arrested for being under the influence of an undisclosed stimulant. Indio’s mother, Deborah Falconer, divorced his father in 2004.

Indio’s Drug Abuse

According to reports, Indio’s father has been helping his son deal with addiction problems for many years. Indio has been in and out of treatment centers, and some reports say he had remained clean and sober for some time, in some part due to his father’s counseling. In 2013, there were reports that Indio was being treated for a “pill problem,” which his mother claimed was not a significant problem. According to Deborah Falconer, Indio was taking “one pill a day” and that he was not addicted. She said Indio was being treated with “holistic, natural and orthomolecular therapy.” After Indio’s arrest on Sunday, however, Robert thanked the Sheriff’s Department for their intervention, stating that there was a “genetic component to addiction” and that “Indio likely inherited it.” Robert has been clean and sober since late 2001.

Children of Addicts

One of the unknown costs of addiction is that children of addicts are eight times more likely to develop an addiction than those whose parents are not addicts. Many studies have confirmed that addiction is a combination of genetics and poor coping skills. In addition, sons of addicted fathers are four times more at risk for developing an addiction than the sons of non-addicted fathers. Much of this is because addicted parents often lack the ability to provide structure or discipline, and the sons of addicted fathers receive harsher discipline than those of non-addicted fathers. These statistics clearly show that the cost of addiction on offspring is high, and indicates why Indio may have turned to substance abuse.

It is clear that this recent arrest shows that Indio may be facing an escalating drug problem, similar to what his father faced in the 1990s. After seeing his father as an addict, as well as the well-known genetic connection regarding addiction, Indio may need intensive therapy in order to fight his addictions.

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What is a Mechanic’s Lien?

Finance

Newspaper Ad for the Carbolic Smoke Ball Company
Image via Wikipedia

When you hire someone to work on your property or provide material to build or improve it, they are entitled to get paid.   A mechanic’s lien is the method of enforcing that payment.

Here is what you need to know about mechanic’s liens.

A contractor must usually give you written notice of intent to file a lien if the contract isn’t paid.  He needs to do this within a short time of beginning the work.   The notice will include text to the effect that subcontractors also have the right to file a lien if they are not paid.  This notice gives you two methods of defense: You can pay the subcontractors directly and withhold that amount from the payment to the contractor, or you can withhold the final payment until you have received a lien waiver from each of the subcontractors.

If the notice isn’t given correctly, the contractor forfeits his right to file a lien.  Also, in most places, if a contractor is supposed to be licensed to do the work, but isn’t, he’s not able to file a lien.

Subcontractors must also provide notice on intent within about 45 days–depending on the state–of the time they first provide services or material, or the lien is not enforceable.

Protecting Yourself

First, you only have to pay once. If you pay the contractor in full before getting the notice of intent from the subcontractors, you can’t be forced to pay again.

Next, make the contractor provide a list of all subcontractors and keep track of any notices of intent you get.  Get lien waivers from everyone involved before you make the final payment to the contractor.

Finally, you have the rights defined in the notice of intent to file a lien.  You can either pay the subcontractors directly, or you can withhold the final payment until you receive lien waivers from each subcontractor.

Resolution

The lien holder has 120 days to file the lien and 1 year to enforce it.   Enforcing simply means that it a suit has been filed.  Once that happens, you can either pay the contractor, attempt to settle with the contractor, or you can take the contractor to court to determine the “adverse claims” on your property.   There aren’t too many choices at this point.

Do yourself a favor and get lien waivers before you make the final payment on any work done on your property.

30 Day Project – January

Misc

This month, I have two 30 Day Projects.

My first project is to start waking up at 5am.   This will add an extra 90 minutes to my day, which will give me time to manage all of my other 30 day projects.   I’ll be able to wake up to a quiet house, walk the dog, eat breakfast and not start every day in a rush to get out of the house.  Today was my exception.  After watching 2010 arrive, I didn’t get up early.

The second project is to start reading to my children every night before bed.  We read to the kids often, but not every day.  That’s going to change.  We are also working on breaking the girls of the family bed.  If I can read them to sleep each night, it will help.  Good, educational family time that makes it easier to sleep every night.

These are both habits I want to keep long after the month is up.