- @ScottATaylor Thanks for following me. in reply to ScottATaylor #
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- [Read more…] about Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-12-12
Mistakes Made
- Image by K. Sawyer via Flickr
My wife and I started dating when we were 19. We married shortly thereafter, and–at 31–we have 3 kids.
Now, most of a decade into my career, with a dozen years of experience as both a husband and an adult, I think we make decent decisions.
When we were younger, though, we were dumb. We didn’t think much past the “year” in “0% for a year”. Our long-term financial planning was non-existent. Heck, most of the time, our short-term financial planning usually consisted of a call to the bank to see if we had enough money to buy whatever we wanted at the moment or rushing to the bank to deposit the change we found in the couch, hoping to beat the last check we wrote.
We were never able to judge ourselves based on how happy we were. It was always a matter of how we were doing in relation to someone else. A relative–a close relative–is 10 years older than we are. That means, naturally, that she had a 10-year headstart on us. We saw the nice house, the nice cars, and the nice furniture and couldn’t help but compare it to our situation. Their stuff was always shiny and new, while we were making repairs and ignoring rust.
That comparison always made responsible spending difficult. We watched one friend upgrade her house twice in 2-3 years, while driving nice cars. Why couldn’t we do that, too?
Bad logic.
In one year, we put an addition on our house, got married, bought a brand-new pickup, and spent 10 days on a ship in the Caribbean. We did that with a gross household income of about $40,000. Before that summer, we didn’t have a mortgage. Since that summer, we have had a car payment, a credit card payment, and a mortgage payment.
I can still smell the scorched plastic peeling off the sides of our well-used credit cards. That year was when we figured out how everyone else affords all of the nice stuff: they bury themselves in debt.
The debt was never a big deal to us. Yes, money was tight. We always had more month than money, but we also had $50,000 in available credit on the cards and a $5000 credit line serving as our overdraft protection. Since we never missed a payment, we thought we were doing well. After all, you don’t have to be able to afford the debt, as long as you can afford the payment, right?
After that, we started putting the nice truck to work hauling home new furniture. Who can go wrong with 0% for a year? Surely, I’d have a raise by the time that comes due.
The same time we paid off the truck, I got a raise. It was a good raise. There we were, a wallet full full of balance-laden credit cards, a mortgage that we could have done without, furniture we were still paying for years later, a freshly paid-for truck, and a small stack of new money. That meant, of course, that we could “afford” a new car that came with a payment that was–coincidentally–equal to the raise. No problem.
Six weeks later, I got laid off.
Two weeks into the layoff, we found out that we were no longer “trying” to have another baby, we were just waiting for 9 months.
I wish(wish!) that would have been a wake-up call, but that moment of clarity was still 18 months away. The driving obsession to get out of debt was another 18 months away. Unemployed and expecting brat #2, I still wasn’t ready to take a rational look at my finances. That, however is a story for another day. Today, is my day to share my biggest financial blunders, not my successes.
What financial mistakes have you made?
10 Dumb Money Moves
Free Money Finance has a post up on Stacy Johnson’s 10 dumbest money moves. I thought I’d share my take.
Here are the mistakes:
1. Not having a goal
2. Not having a spending plan
3. Attempting to derive self-esteem from possessions
4. Doing what everyone else is doing
5. Starting to save large and late rather than small and soon
6. Paying interest to buy things that drop in value
7. Turning down free money
8. Buying a new car
9. Buying more house than you need or can afford.
10. Not protecting your good credit
Here is my response(and a test: Orthogonal Monkey Silicon Beam)
:
1. For most of the last 15 years, I didn’t have much for financial goals. “Get more money” isn’t specific enough to be a goal, and our spending precluded the possibility, anyway. Right now, my financial goal is simple: Get out of debt. I’m down to about $61,000.
2. We have a budget, even if it’s been partially ignored for the last couple of months. If it weren’t for my side-hustles, we would have come out negative last month.
3. We struggle with this one a lot. “Keeping up with the Joneses” is an issue in our house. My wife’s closest family is 10 years older than we are, and has more stuff, which makes it hard to visit without making comparisons. We both know it’s irrational, but it’s the way it is.
4. We are fighting this one as well. The fight is going better than #3. We’ve stopped using new debt, which shocked our friends, and I’m working on launching a new business, to break more bonds.
5. Is 30 late? We’re saving small while he fight debt, but I think we started early enough to make the rest of our lives easier.
6. We pay far too much in interest each month, but there has been absolutely no new debt since April 2009.
7. I got into my company’s retirement plan to get the match, but that ends next month. My wife’s employer killed the match 5 years ago. There’s no free money to turn down anymore.
8. We bought a new truck, as part of our debt-accumulation, in 2001. In 2005, we instead bought a car as it came off a lease. It had 11,000 miles on it and that saved us $10,000.
9. We bought our house in 1998. It sits on 1/8 of an acre. sometimes space is tight, but we’ve watched so many people trade up and find themselves in severe trouble. I’m happy we’ve stayed here.
10. This is one we’ve always guarded. No matter how much debt we’ve had, we’ve made every payment. We’re hugging the underside of an 800 FICO score. Thankfully, we’re closing in on the point where FICO no longer matters, because we’re paying in cash.
What are your biggest money mistakes?
Future Dreams
While jogging with my wife a few days ago, we had a conversation that we haven’t had in years. We discussed our dreams.
It’s an important conversation for couples to have. What are your hopes? What are your dreams? Where do you want to be in 10 years? In 20? In 50? Planning for the future gives you a map for the present.
My wife and I hadn’t had this conversation in years. A few days ago, we did. Our life-goals are simple and achievable.
I want to leave the corporate world and support my family with writing and the training classes I do. I want a chunk of land outside of any major metropolitan area, but close enough for the entertainment and shopping. I want enough land to expand my classes on my own property, relying on no one.
My wife wants enough land to have some horses. It was unspoken, but I think she wants my goals to take off so they can support her goals, too.
We want a comfortable retirement and we want to help the kids with college.
We’re a bit behind the game for college funding. That’s ok, though. There is nothing wrong with a kid working his way through college and learning those life lessons.
We are also behind on the retirement. But, if I can support us doing the things I love, I don’t need $X million. Retirement isn’t a cessation of activity, it is taking the time to do the things you love on your own schedule. If writing a book while sitting on my private range is enough to fund our life, that’s the perfect retirement.
Charity Scams
- Image by Emery Co Photo via Flickr
‘Tis the season to give away your stuff.
As Christmas rolls in, it’s common to see people ringing bells for charity outside of stores, or knocking on doors asking for your help with their pet causes. Phone and mail solicitations are up. You’ve got your pockets open and everybody’s hoping for some cash.
Good for you. Charity is wonderful.
I openly treat charity as the selfish act it truly is. Donating my time and money to causes I support makes me feel good about myself. I like feeling good about myself. The other reasons people give to charity are A) to make people like them, or B) to receive tax deductions. That’s it. There are 3 possible reasons to donate: to like yourself, to make others like you, or to save some tax money. I thought about adding guilt to the list, but that is covered by some blend of the first two reasons.
How can you know that the charity you are donating to is worth it? There are a ton of evil bastards out there trying to cash in on your desire to feel good. They want your money because rolling around naked in ill-gotten gains is what makes them feel good. Naked scammers sprawled across my cash isn’t a visual that makes me feel good.
Wait, you say? People use charities for cons, you ask? In 2005, The National Arthritis Association was busted for convincing people that it was somehow related to The Arthritis Foundation, when in reality, it was using the money for hookers and blow. Or something decidedly not arthritis-cure-related. If a charity sounds like something you know, but isn’t quite there, check into it before you donate.
It’s also common for scammers to run a phone campaign, pretending to be the Red Cross, the Salvation Army, or United Way. Those are all good charities, but they don’t benefit from the good intentions of the victims. The scammers just want the credit card information. Once they have that, it’s off to Rio for a crazy week of xxxxxx on a xxxxxx with a xxxxxxx for xxxxxx. (Editor’s note: This is a family-friendly blog.) Don’t give out your credit card information to anyone over the phone. Ever. Tell the caller to send you something in the mail, or promise to visit their website. But don’t give them the keys to your cash.
How can you avoid funding a Nigerian coup that will surely end in the downfall of the righteous king, causing all of his heirs to email me(as the only trustworthy person in the world) to help move the nation’s fortune out of the country in exchange for a mere 10% of the loot? I mean, how can you be sure you are donating to a good organization?
The easiest way is to ask the IRS. You can call them at 877-829-5500 or visit their website at http://www.irs.gov/charities/article/0,,id=96136,00.html to search for charities that have actually filed with the IRS. Not all charities have filed. Some state-based nonprofits don’t bother, but you can check with your Secretary of State to verify their status.
Always pay by check or credit card. Cash is untraceable. If a charity turns out to be a scam, leaving a trail makes it easier to prosecute.
Don’t give in to the guilt-tactics. If a charity is worth giving to today, it will be worth it tomorrow, too. There’s no rush. If the solicitor is trying to rush you, it’s probably a scam.
Remember, it’s your money. Take care of it.
What are your favorite charities?
Saturday Roundup
First, the shameless self-promotion:
If you want to see the glorious wisdom that is my Twitter feed, follow me on Twitter. I’m @LiveRealNow.
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And of course, there is always the wonderful RSS subscription.
The Best Posts of the Week:
- Cover of Monster Hunter International
Give the gift of kidneys so that Larry Correia can murder you for charity. Larry is the author of Monster Hunter International and Monster Hunter: Vendetta. Both books are excellent mind-candy, if you like explosions and monsters that, well, explode. Save a life and get murdered at the same time. Who could ask for more?
A V-8 only insinuates virility; multiple child seats prove it. With a title like this, and multiple car seats in my car, I have to include the post.
And finally, here are some tips to save time with email: Email Sucks.
Finally, a list of the carnivals and blogs I’ve participated in:
Dustin at Engaged Marriage was kind enough to run my guest post: Arguing Fairly with your Spouse.
I was included in the Carnival of Personal Finance with Check Your Bills.
Repair Plans, Appliances, and Rancid Meat…Oh, My! was included in the Carnival of Money Stories.
Selling Your Home: The Real Estate Agent was included in the Festival of Frugality.
If I missed a carnival, please let me know. Thanks to those who have included me!