- @fcn Yahoo Pipes into GReader. 50 news sites filtered to max 50 items/day–all on topic. in reply to fcn #
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- It's a sad day when you find out that your 3 year old can access anything in the house. Sadder when she maces herself with hairspray. #
- 5 sets of 15 pushups to start my day. Only 85 to go! Last 5 weren't as good as first 5. #30DayProject #
- What happens to your leftover money in your flex-spending account? http://su.pr/9xDs6q #
- Enter to Win iPod Touch from @DoughRoller http://tinyurl.com/y8rpyns #DRiPodTouch #
- Arrrgh! 3 year old covered in nail polish. And clothes. And carpet. And sister. #
- Crap. 5 sets of 5 pushups. #30dayproject #
- Woo! My son just got his first pin in a wrestling meet! #
- RT @Doughroller: Check out this site that gives your free credit report AND score without asking for a cc# or social… http://bit.ly/bRhlMz #
- Breaking news! Penicillin cures syphilis, not debt. https://liverealnow.net/KIzE #
- Win a $25 Amazon GC via @suburbandollar RT + Fllw to enter #sd1Yrgvwy Rules -> http://bit.ly/sd1Yrgvwy2 #
- This won't be coming to our house. RT @FMFblog: Wow! Check out the new Monopoly: http://tinyurl.com/ygf2say #
- @ChristianPF is giving away a Flip UltraHD Camcorder – RT to enter to win… http://su.pr/2ZvBZL #
No Brakes
Growing up, I was mostly poor, but I didn’t realize it. The electricity was never shut off and I never missed a meal, but there was rarely money for anything extra. Clothes were only purchased immediately before school started. Shoes were always at least one size too big. Hand-me-downs were a way of life. With very rare exceptions, new toys were given on birthdays and at Christmas. As a Christmas baby, this was unfortunate. If I wanted something during the year, I had to buy it. I had an allowance on and off–more off than on–for a few years. So, I got my first job-a paper route-when I was six. Most of the toys I accumulated as a child, I bought.
Through all of this, my parents never said “We can’t afford it.” I was simply told that if I wanted something, I could either save my money or wait for Christmas. I never saw my parents paying bills, but they got paid. I never saw a checkbook get balanced, but it did. There were only a few times money management was ever mentioned, even in passing.
Naturally, when I moved out on my own, I expected money to take care of itself, just as it had the entire time I was growing up. That wasn’t terrible until I got married, bought a house, built an addition and decided a needed a new car. There was nothing in me to apply the brakes. I can count the number of missed payments I’ve had on one hand-with fingers left over. I can’t begin to guess the number of purchases, both large and small, that I should have skipped but didn’t.
Shortages growing up coupled with absolutely no budget training turned into financial irresponsibility as an adult.
My wife grew up with almost the exact opposite training. She was also poor, but the household budget was clearly in evidence and generally taken to an extreme. Her training involved getting “the best bang for the buck”. If an item was on sale and could potentially be useful, her mother bought five. I don’t mean five similar variations. That’s five identical products, same size, same color. She still has a display box full of screwdrivers with interchangeable tips. It looked useful and it was on sale, so she bought them all.
Through all of that, the bills were always paid.
This training has made it difficult for my wife to turn down a sale price. If something is on sale-or worse, clearance-there is an excellent chance it will be coming to our house. Once again, there are no brakes.
Shortages growing up coupled with almost two decades of watching every sale turn into a purchase has turned into financial irresponsibility growing up.
Neither one of us were prepared to handle the financial aspect of being an adult. That is something we intend to improve on for our children. We intend to give them the ability to brake themselves.
Resisting Temptation
This guest post was written as a guest post (by me!) in 2010.
There I was, minding my own business, when suddenly, Sumdood came out came out of nowhere and forced me to buy a new flat-panel TV, a time share in St. Thomas, and join one of those overpriced underwear-of-the-month clubs. Talk about a bad day, rivaled only by the day the odd, lacy package gets delivered on the first of the month.
No, really, as I go about my business each day, the temptation to spend my money can be almost irresistible. Yet somehow, I manage. Is it because I have superhuman willpower? I don’t. Is it because I’m chased by a leather-clad, sjambok-wielding pixie who chastises me for every unbudgeted purchase? That’s not it either, but it makes for a fun picture.
What’s my secret?
I follow a principle I like to call “Don’t buy that!” Don’t buy that! is a simple plan that is surprisingly hard to implement, mostly because following the plan means delaying gratification for a while. Delayed gratification is never as much fun as instantly indulging every whim.
I can hear your shouts of protest. If it’s so hard, how can I expect you to do it? Easy. Just follow the rules. There are a few things you can do to make Don’t buy that! a realistic plan of action for you.
1. Find a slap-me-upside-the-head buddy. I use my wife. It works for me and she tends to enjoy it. If I’m in a store and I get tempted to buy something awesome, I call her for a reality check. Sometimes, it’s as straight-forward as my calling her and saying “Honey, tell me ‘no’.” Other times, she actually has to talk me down using–horror of horrors–logic and reasoning. Usually, she just invokes rule #2.
2. If you have to check if you can afford it, you can’t. If I’m not immediately sure that we have the money to buy something, it is far too big of a purchase to buy on an impulse. Big purchases need to be planned. “Honey, I found this great TV on sale!” “Can we afford it?” “I don’t know, let me che…crap. Nevermind.”
3. You can have anything you want, but you can’t have everything. We could afford a fancy vacation in Paris every year, but not if we also pay for extended super-cable, Netflix, dinner out every night, and a new car every three years. Expenses need to be prioritized.
4. The little things can ruin you. There’s a story about a nail missing from a horse’s shoe, which lamed the horse, which made the knight miss a battle, which was lost, which led to the loss of the war, which led to the loss of the kingdom. For want of a single nail, a nation fell. If I buy a new book or movie every week, will I end up short on my mortgage payment? It’s far easier to pick up some of the little things after the necessities are met than it is to try to pay the mortgage after squandering your paycheck on lottery tickets and Mad Dog. Handle your needs before you worry about your wants. Sometimes, that means putting off the things you want, but having the things you need makes it worthwhile.
5. Remember the past. When I bought a bunch of movies a few months ago, I was happy. New movies go great the the movie screen and projector in my living room. Want to take a guess at how many of those movies I’ve taken the time to watch? I certainly enjoyed the act of buying the movies and the anticipation of watching them far more than I’ve enjoyed seeing them site on the shelf, unopened. What a waste. It happens regularly. Often, we get far more enjoyment out of the idea of doing something that the actual doing. If I can remember that the anticipation is better than the act, before I buy whatever is tempting me, I can usually avoid buying it.
These 5 rules have helped me to follow my master plan of Don’t buy that! That plan is the single most useful thing I have ever used to save money.
What’s your best tip to save money?
Handling a Windfall
What would you do if you were handed $10,000 tomorrow? $20,000?
The easy default answer–if you spend time in the personal finance world–is to pay off debt and save the rest.
But is that the right answer?
When my mother-in-law died, we inherited a little bit of money, a house that hasn’t been updated since the 60s, and a new-ish car that still has an active loan.
We also have about $16,000 in credit card debt and a small mortgage.
The Dave Ramsey answer would be to pay off the card at all costs and worry about the inherited house later, but that seems off. If we modernize the house and fix the things that are broken, we have a mortgage-free rental property. Our local rental market is strong; we should be able to clear $800 per month after expenses.
Is the right answer to pay off our card and scrape to get the house ready or should we fix up the house and use that new income to pay off the card?
My wife has also inherited an IRA that–due to its status as a Beneficiary IRA and the fact that there have been disbursements–has to be drained within 5 years. It’s not huge. After taxes, it’s about the size of the car loan. Should we make the $200/month payments, or cash out the temporary IRA and make the car loan go away immediately? Should we cash out the IRA and open one for my wife?
Although the cause was sad, these are good problems to have. If we manage this right, we’ll be more financially stable than we would have been for decades, otherwise.
I want your opinion, please.
2 questions:
1. House or credit card?
2. What would you do with a $10,000 IRA that has to be cashed out over the next 5 years?
February 30 Day Project #1: Romantic Gestures
For the month of February, I had two 30 Day Projects: Do 100 pushups in a single set and another, that I haven’t posted. Until now.
The reason I haven’t posted anything about the second project is because it would have ruined it. I set a goal to do something nice for my wife every single day. It’s really a much harder goal than it sounds. Between juggling wrestling practice, crabby kids, the usual winter illnesses and deadlines at work, finding time to arrange for anything special presents a challenge, and I wanted it to be a surprise.
This morning, the last day of the month, I made breakfast in bed. While she was eating, I handed her a letter and set a present on the floor next to the bed. The present was one of our wedding invitations, framed, and the closing of our wedding ceremony in a matching frame.
The letter reads:
Dearest,
As you know, I’ve been working on a series of thirty-day projects. In January, I got up at 5 every day and read to the girls almost every day. If February, my project has been to get to 100 pushups in a single set. Almost.
I worked at that and accomplished it, but it was really a cover project. I love you and wanted a way to express that. So, my main project has been you.
In the first week of the month, we had two snowstorms, do you remember? For each one, I made sure to get your truck cleaned off before you were ready to go to work, with fresh coffee. At the beginning of the week, you got a full 30 minute backrub, with absolutely no hidden motive. At the end of the week, I sent you a letter expressing my feelings. Over the weekend, you had no diapers to do–I think you ended up with one–and I let you sleep in as late as you wanted on Sunday. It was a good first week.
The second week, there was another snowstorm on Monday. Combining that with the grocery shopping kept me from having time to do anything on Monday, but Tuesday, you woke up to a clean truck again. Wednesday, there were flowers. Thursday, dinner. Game night at [friend’s house]? That was planned, by me, 3 weeks in advance. Over the weekend, I watched the kids so you could go to [cousin’s] to relax, and you got breakfast in bed on Sunday. I may have missed a day, but the week was still a success, I think.
The following week, while you were getting ready for bed, you saw me go outside and asked about it. Thankfully, the girls woke up, because I had just put a note in your truck telling you 10 things I love about you. I also took all of the kids to wrestling–twice–to give you some sanity time and gave you another long backrub. This was also the week you got sick, which meant a day in bed for you, instead of me being able to plan something nice.
This week, the last week of the month, I took all of the kids to wrestling again, giving you a chance to take a nice, relaxing bath. Those were originally planned to be two separate nights. Instead, it was combined into one night. I also managed to go shopping to buy the components of the present I am giving you, put the present together, and write this letter. Last night, our date was a part of this, and today, so is breakfast.
My goal has been to do something nice for you, every day. So now, for an entire month, you have been the focus of my dedicated attention, nearly every single day. I’ve felt closer to you, than I have in a while. Have you enjoyed the attention?
Happy Valentine’s Month.
The actual expenses were the flowers, the frames, dinner and a movie, and a buy-in for Texas Hold ‘Em at her cousin’s house. Everything else was done with what we have, gifts of time and energy instead of money.
Total cost: $159 for an entire month of romantic gestures. Money well-spent, for sure.
Update: This post has been included in the Money Hacks Carnival.
Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-12-12
- @ScottATaylor Thanks for following me. in reply to ScottATaylor #
- RT @ChristianPF: 5 Tips For Dealing With Your Medical Debt http://su.pr/2cxS1e #
- Dining Out vs Cooking In: http://su.pr/3JsGoG #
- RT: @BudgetsAreSexy: Be Proud of Your Emergency Fund! http://tinyurl.com/yhjo88l ($1,000 is better than $0.00) #
- [Read more…] about Twitter Weekly Updates for 2009-12-12
