- RT @ScottATaylor: The Guys on "Pickers" should just follow the "Hoarders" teams around- perfect mashup #
- PI/PNK test: http://su.pr/2umNRQ #
- RT @punchdebt: When I get married this will be my marital slogan "Unity through Nudity" #
- http://su.pr/79idLn #
- RT @jeffrosecfp: Wow! RT @DanielLiterary:Stats show 80% of Americns want to write a book yet only 57% have read at least 1 bk in the last yr #
- @jeffrosecfp That's because everyone thinks their lives are unique and interesting. in reply to jeffrosecfp #
- @CarrieCheap Congrats! #CPA in reply to CarrieCheap #
- @prosperousfool I subscribe to my own feed in google reader. Auto backup for in between routine backups. Saved me when I got hacked. in reply to prosperousfool #
- @SuzeOrmanShow No more benefits? I bet the real unemployment rate goes down shortly thereafter. in reply to SuzeOrmanShow #
- Losing power really make me appreciate living in the future. #
Kids Are Temporary
Have you ever watched someone go nuts after they have kids?
I mean, even after the I-haven’t-slept-more-than-20-minutes-in-a-row-for-3-months stage of babydom?
These people dedicate their lives to their kids. They sacrifice all of their hopes and dreams and focus on the brats. They can’t have a date night because little Sally might get lonely without mommy and daddy. Can’t have a hobby because Johnny’s on the traveling soccer team. Can’t get laid because it’s a family bed and that’s kind of creepy when the kids are right there.
Everything for the kids.
As they grow, it gets worse. You spend more time helping with homework and less time talking to your wife. More time playing chauffeur, less time playing doctor.
It’s a nasty cycle, and it comes with an abrupt stop.
What happens when school’s out? Little Johnny graduates with a dual degree in Practical Philosophy and Experimental Art History, gets a job at the local Stab-and-Grab, gets married, and starts a family.
When that happens, parents suddenly become “extended family”. The kid has a life of his own and probably doesn’t need his clothes picked out in the morning, a ride to soccer practice, or someone to write his name in his underwear.
This is planned. It is–in theory–the reason we raise our kids. It shouldn’t be a surprise, even if it is a bit of a shock.
Can you survive it? Can your marriage?
If you’ve spent the last 20 years of your life pretending you are nothing but a system for delivering food, rides, and gadgets for your kids, what are you going to do with your time when they are busy pretending they are that system for their kids? If you’ve never developed a hobby, are you going to go extra-special, bat-**** crazy now?
For 20 years, have all of your conversations been about your kids? Have all of your outings been birthday parties? Will you have anything to say to your spouse when the kids are gone?
Your kids are temporary.
They are important. They are your genetic legacy and the people who will choose your nursing home. Don’t neglect them, but you do have to hold something back. Make time for yourself. Make time for your husband or your wife. Or both, if you can make that work.
When your kids are working 90 hour weeks building a new career, or hustling 4 kids to 10 after-school activities, your life doesn’t get to revolve around them.
All you’ve got is yourself and your wife. If she’s not feeling secure about your feelings now, when she loses the distraction of puke in her hair, that insecurity will blossom in unpleasant ways. If you can’t find a conversation that doesn’t involve the kids now, the silence will be blistering when you eventually lose that crutch.
If you don’t have a hobby, get one.
If you don’t have a relationship with your wife, get one. Take her on a date tonight. Your kids are temporary, your marriage shouldn’t be. This is the rest of your life. Make it worthwhile.
March 30 Day Project
For March, my 30 Day Project is to do 100 sit-ups in a single set.
Based on the results of my February project, I will be doing 5 sets, morning and night, as follows:
Set 1: Half of my maximum amount.
Sets 2-4: 3/4 of my max.
Set 5: Do sit-ups until my abs start to cramp, thus setting my max for the next session.
This month, I only have one project.
I just turned 2!
Update: Over $500 in prizes!
Yesterday was my second anniversary here. For the last two years, I have shared my thoughts, feelings, and finances three times a week and you have been there to watch and share as I figure out my financial future.
I appreciate it.
To show my appreciation, I’m giving stuff away.
Here are the prizes:
1 $100 prize
1 $75 prize
6 $25 prizes, courtesy of ThirtySixMonths, Budgeting in the Fun Stuff, Maximizing Money, Personal Finance Whiz, and Broke Professionals.
1 iPod Shuffle courtesy of Prairie Eco-Thrifter.
1 $25 Amazon gift card courtesy of Beating Broke.
A copy of each of the iPhone and iPad versions of the Pay Off Debt app from The Debt Myth
1 $20 Amazon gift card, courtesy of Money Crush.
1 $25 Starbuck’s gift card, courtesy of Mom’s Plans.
I’m also giving away some books, some of which have been lightly read.
Financial Peace Revisited by Dave Ramsey
Never Pay Retail by Sid Kirchheimer
Delivering Happiness (advanced reader copy) by Tony Hsieh
I Will Teach You To Be Rich by Ramit Sethi
The Art of Non-Conformity by Chris Guillebeau
CreditCards.com Book of Cartoons
Women & Money by Suze Orman
To enter:
Follow the instuctions in the widget below. Following me on Facebook, Twitter, RSS, or email will all earn entries. Following any of the sponsors on Twitter of Facebook will earn you entries. Tweeting about the giveaway as often as you like or linking to this page on your site will earn you entries.
There are lots of ways to enter and 16 prizes to win.
The drawing will be held on December 23rd, just in time to give you some cash before Christmas.
Good luck!
5 Ways to Reduce Temptation and Have a Peaceful dinner
It never fails: you send the kids off to the salt mine babysitter for the evening, cook a nice dinner and light some candles. Then, just as you sit down, the phone rings.
Now you have 2 choices, you can do like me and ignore the phone if it’s inconvenient to answer or you can ruin a romantic dinner. The telemarketers know that, statistically, you are home at dinner time. They don’t care if you are celebrating an anniversary or just trying to connect with your loved one.
Why not preemptively stop the irritation? While you’re at it, stop the junk mail, too. It’s not as hard as you’d think. It’s a simple, almost free process that will not only eliminate the frustration of pointless calls and sorted junk mail, but will also cut down on the temptation of seeing something shiny to buy.
Here are the four steps to a leaner, greener and romantic dinner-making you:
1. Get on all of the Do Not Call lists.
- You can get on the federal list by visiting www.donotcall.gov or calling (888) 382-1222. The tele-sales weasels will have have a month to clear you out of their systems.
- If you still get calls–some calls are still allowed, including political calls, non-profit fundraisers, and surveys–they are still required to maintain an in-house do not call list. Tell them to put you on that list.
- Many states have a Do Not Call list that is entirely independent of the the federal list. This is redundant, but the more roadblocks you put up, the better you will be.
If you are still getting calls, report them to the FTC at:
Federal Trade Commission
Consumer Response Center
600 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW
Washington, D.C. 20580
1-877-FTC-HELP
www.ftc.gov
2. Opt out of junk mail. The Direct Marketing Association manages a list of people who do not want junk mail. This list only applies to members of the association, but most mass-mailers participate. Go to www.dmachoice.org to enroll. It costs $1 to get on the list and will stop most junk mail for 3 years.
3. Opt out of pre-approved credit card offers. Go to www.optoutprescreen.com to remove your name from the lists generated by the major credit bureaus to sell to marketing firms. You can put a halt to this breed of junk for 5 years or forever.
4. Ask them to stop. If you are getting catalogs from a company with which you have an existing relationship, ask them to knock it off. Virtually every one will stop sending you garbage to ensure a continuing business relationship with you.
5. Guerrilla Warfare. If none of this works, there are still a couple of options.
- Keep an airhorn by the phone. They won’t call twice.
- Take everything you receive from a company, stuff it all in the prepaid return envelope they helpfully included, and drop it back in the mail. They only get charged for the prepaid envelopes when they are used, so use them up. It’s illegal to alter them to send mail to other people, but it’s not illegal to mail them all of their own garbage. If you cost them enough money, they will eventually back down.
The Zombie Guide to Saving
Brains!
Nobody has ever accused a zombie of being smart. The are, after all, dead and rotting. Their primary means of education themselves is eating the brains of the living, which is hardly an efficient learning style. Besides, in a strictly Darwinian sense, their victims are among the least qualified to teach useful skills.
Zombies smell. They are little more than flesh-eating monsters. They are lousy in the sack. Yet, for all their flaws, have you ever heard of a zombie in debt or worried about financing retirement? They are obviously doing something right.
What can you learn from a zombie? That depends on the type of zombie. Not all of the life-challenged were created equal.
There are 3 main types of zombies:
1. Slow shamblers are best recognized by their lurching gait and unintelligible grunting, similar to a frat party at 3AM. They are rarely fresh specimens. Arguably the the scariest of all zeds, due to the sheer inevitability of their assault, they do always get where they are going, even if it takes a while. Trapped in a pit or a pool, they will keep trying to reach their goal. A slow shambler, were he able to effectively communicate beyond the basic “Hey, can I eat your brain?” would tell you to approach your goals like the famous tortoise: slowly. Set aside an affordable amount in savings every week, no matter what. Even if your are stuck saving just $10 each month, you will eventually get your sweet, sweet brains.
2. Voodoo zombies are the still-living, yet mindless minions on a voodoo priest. These unlucky non-corpses crossed the wrong people–usually by stealing or not repaying their debts–and ended up cursed for it. They are forced to do the bidding of their masters until such time as their debt has been repaid, if ever. Their warning is to always pay your debts and do not steal. Honest, ethical behavior is the best way to avoid this fate.
3. Runners are almost always “fresh” to the game. As they decompose, they slowly transform into slow shamblers. These fellas can often pass for the living…from a distance. By the time you get close enough to identify them as monsters, your brains are on the menu. They are capable of sprinting for short distances and, on occasion, have even been seen to run up vertical walls. To properly categorize the runners, we have to break them down into 2 sub-groups. The first sub-group is the envy of all zombies still capable of envy. They have used their skills to trap enough prey(that’s us, folks!) that they will feel no hunger for the foreseeable future. They are secure. They are the successful runners. The other sub-group tries to emulate the first, but lack both planning and follow-through. While the first group builds momentum to secure their future, the second group tends to use that momentum to smack face-first into the wall, confused at where their lunch went. Constantly charging from one thing to the next, they never manage to sink a claw into their goals. To avoid falling into the second group, you’ll have to settle on a strategy and pursue it with all the single-minded, decomposing determination you can muster.
You know what they say: “Great minds taste alike.” What kind of financial zombie are you?
