Search Results for “three-alternatives-to-a-budget/subscribe-by-email/budget-lesson-part-2/slow-carb-diet-how-to-avoid-going-bat-crazy/quit-smoking-my-first-frugal-move-ever/what-happens-when-you-save/brown-bagging-your-way-to-savings/how-to-complain-the-squeaky-wheel-gets-the-grease/contact-me/5-steps-to-save/budget-lesson-part-1” — Page 13

Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.

Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?

Me: Yes?

FMe: <Slap!>

Me: May I ask what that was for?

FMe: Of course.

Me: What was that for, jerk?

FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.

Me: What?!? I’ve never even met you, before.

FMe: Of course you have. I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.

Me: Huh?

FMe: Listen close. You’re not the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.

Me: ???

FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.

Me: I don’t appreciate….

FMe: Shut up. I was dumb then, too. Remember? You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year. On top of many other expensive decisions. Do your recall?

Me: Yes, I do. So what?

FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car. Your kids wear new clothes. You’ve got a house full of new furniture. How did you pay for all of that?

Me: Naturally, I charged it. Zero payments, zero interest for a year! Pretty smart, huh?

FMe: What happens in a year?

Me: I don’t know. I’ve got a full year to figure that out.

FMe: <Slap!> I’ll tell you what happens! Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed! Your raise didn’t come through. You had a baby. The truck broke down. Your wife took maternity leave. A roommate moved out. You took a loss in the stock market. You didn’t plan! You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.

Me: How was I to know?

FMe: <Slap!> Life happens! You never know what is coming next. You need to plan and save for what might happen. Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly. That is not acceptable.

Me: So? What are you going to do about it?

FMe: <Slap!>

Me: Really? Again?

FMe: <Slap!> I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help. Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux. My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford. You’ve screwed me, dude.

Me: I’m sorry. What can I do to fix it?

FMe: Buy me dinner, first.

Me: Huh?!?!?

FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change. No credit.

Me: None?

FMe: None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Only spend what you can afford. Budget. Pay off those nasty bills. Don’t leave me hanging.

Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?

FMe: Exactly. That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence. Live in the real world.

Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me! Now I know.

FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

Multiracial Skinhead Love Triangle

Finance, Life

“Honey, here on national television, in front of a live studio audience, I’ve got a secret I’d like to share. You’re not our child’s mother. I’ve been sleeping with the milkman. And the goat. Your mom is the star of my new adult website. With the goat. And the milkman. I’ve got three other families, in three other cities. I lost the house to my gambling addiction. Those sores? Herpesyphiligonoritis. I got it from the foreign exchange student we hosted before I moved her to Dubuque and married her. The goat gave her away. The milkman cried. Oh, and I wore your panties to the Illinois Nazi reunion. I know how much you hate Illinois Nazis. But I still love you. And your sister. Especially your sister. She does that thing with her tongue….”

Why would anyone go on national television to share things like that?

More interesting: why would anybody stay on stage after hearing that?

Stay tuned.

I have this friend. He bought a couple of cars. He’s got some issues with money, partially revolving around a need to keep his assets below a certain threshold. So he put the cars in his girlfriend’s name. I know, it’s slightly crooked, but that makes the story more fun.

They broke up.

Recently, she called him to say she was suing him for the cars. She wanted them. She wanted to hurt him. She was mean. Somehow that turned into them agreeing to settle the case on Judge Joe Brown, on national television.

My friend spoke with the show’s producer, then last week, he was flown to California and put up in a hotel for a couple of days. When he arrived at the TV studio, he was informed that it wasn’t Judge Joe Brown, but a new show that will start airing in the fall called, The Test. According to CBS, The Test “is a one-hour conflict resolution talk show that will use lie detector and DNA tests to settle relationship and paternity disputes among the guests.” Coincidentally, CBS also owns Judge Joe Brown.

My friend got on stage with Dr. Phil’s son, Jay McGraw, and was accused of cheating on his girlfriend and stealing her identity. Lie detectors. Yelling. Accusations.

Why did he stay?

He wasn’t given his return plane ticket until they were done filming.

When he was done, they handed him a voucher for cab fare and the itinerary for his return flight. Until then, he had no other way to get home.

That’s why people stay on stage. It’s probably also why none of those shows ever have people with money of their own; they can find their own way home in a pinch.

Interesting side note: The show paid $200 and booked the cheapest possible return flight, with a 6 hour layover.

How to Save

Finance

Saving is hard. For years, we would either not save at all, or we’d save a bit, then rush to spend it. That didn’t get us very far. Years of pretending to save like this left us with nothing in reserve. Finally, we’ve figured out the strategy to save money.

First and foremost, make more than you spend. This holds true at any level of income. If you don’t make much money, then you need to not spend much, either. Sometimes, this isn’t possible under current circumstances. In those cases, you need to either increase your income or decrease your expenses. Cut the luxuries and pick up a side hustle. The wider the gap between your bottom line and your top line, the easier it is to save.

Next, make a budget and stick to it. There is no better way to track both your income and your expenses. I’ve discussed budgets before, so I won’t address that in detail today. Short version: Make a budget. Use any software you like. Use paper if you want. Make it and use it.

Pay yourself first. The first expense listed on your budget should be you. Save first. If you can’t afford to save, you can’t afford some of the other items in your budget. Cut the cable or take the bus, but save your money. Without an emergency fund, your budget is just a empty dream when something unexpected comes up. And something unexpected always comes up.

Automate that payment to yourself. Don’t leave yourself any excuse not to make that payment. Set up an automated transfer to another bank and forget about it. Schedule the transfer to happen on payday, every payday.

Now comes the hard part: Forget about the money. Don’t check your balance. Don’t think about it in any way. Just ignore it. For the first month or two, this will be difficult. After that, you’ll forget it exists for a few months and come back amazed at how much you’ve saved.

If you don’t forget about it, and you decide to dip into the account, you are undoing everything you’ve worked so hard to save. Do yourself a favor and leave the money alone.

Saturday Roundup – Happy New Year!

Misc

This week, my daycare provider has taken off to have surgery. That means I have 10 days off in a row. I haven’t done that since I was laid off at my last job, four years ago. I’m really looking forward to the time with my brats.

Happy New Year! Here’s hoping 2011 beats the pants off of 2010, no matter how 2010 went for you.

Best Posts

Free From Broke has a monster post with the best personal finance articles of the year. If you need something to read….

Lifehacker posted about a service that will grade and critique your resume for free. I’m not looking for a new job, but it looks like a great service.

Have you ever considered the similarities between hookers, doctors, and TSA agents?

Here’s an interesting analysis of the huge stimulus package that was supposed to revive the economy. With all of the red tape and deadlines involved in getting the stimulus money, only projects that were going to happen anyway and already had permits and approval actually happened. Private enterprise held off starting projects, hoping to get stimulus funding, only to find out they couldn’t possibly jump through the hoops in time, which is when they lost investors. Huge fail with nothing accomplished beyond packing a ton of taxpayer money in a fat .gov bong and watching it go up in smoke.

LRN Timewarp

This is where I review the posts I wrote a year ago.

I wrote a post on the dangers of hypocrisy. It’s a good post to re-read whenever I start feeling judgmental.

I also started my budget series. Lesson 1 detailed my discretionary budget category.

Finally, I asked what you’ve done to improve your situation. Every day, you can do something. It may not be a big thing, but even small steps in the right direction will get you where you need to be.

Get More Out of Live Real, Now

There are so many ways you can read and interact with this site.

You can subscribe by RSS and get the posts in your favorite news reader. I prefer Google Reader.

You can subscribe by email and get, not only the posts delivered to your inbox, but occasional giveaways and tidbits not available elsewhere.

You can ‘Like’ LRN on Facebook. Facebook gets more use than Google. It can’t hurt to see what you want where you want.

You can follow LRN on Twitter. This comes with some nearly-instant interaction.

You can send me an email, telling me what you liked, what you didn’t like, or what you’d like to see more(or less) of. I promise to reply to any email that isn’t purely spam.

That’s all for today. Have a great weekend!

Make Extra Money, Part 6.5: Why I Do It The Way I Do It

Business, Finance

This is a follow-up to part 6 of the niche site walkthrough, Setting Up a Niche Site. If you haven’t read that post, this one won’t mean much. Go ahead. Read it. I’ll wait.

Several people have asked me to explain why I use the plugins and settings I use. In this installment of the Make Extra Money series, I’m going to explain every choice I recommended last time.

WordPress

WordPress is a site development dream. With the right themes and plugins, you can literally make a WordPress site look, feel, and behave in any way you wish. Even without digging too deep into plugins and premium themes like Headway, you can put together a niche site blog in very little time and know that it’s happening on a robust platform that is actively being improved.

Configuring WordPress

Updates

Keeping your site updated is the single most important thing you can do to avoid getting hacked. Since I haven’t yet figured out how to make hacking a terminal disease, I do the best I can to avoid letting them cause problems. Keeping your site updated is the condom of WordPress.

WWW

This is entirely a personal preference, but, after 20 years of reinforcing habits, most people type “www” by default. WordPress will automatically forward visitors correctly, so this isn’t actually a necessity.

The “Misc” Category

I don’t spend much time worrying about categories when I post, and sometimes I experiment with using external software to post from pools of articles, so I set up a default category. “Misc” is much nicer to see than “Uncategorized”, even if they mean the same thing.

Theme Selection

I like SimpleX because it is uncluttered and easy to navigate. It’s hardly the most powerful theme out there, but it doesn’t pretend to be. If I want more, I use Headway.

Plugins

Plugin Central

Plugin Central is just a plugin installer that lets you install and activate many plugins at once. Even knowing exactly what plugins you want, this easily saves half an hour of setup time.

All in One SEO Pack

SEO is important. In fact, it’s what I base my niche site traffic on. All in One SEO makes it easy to manage the SEO titles that search engines see and the meta descriptions that search engine’s display to visitors when they see your site after a search. Some themes do this themselves, but I still use this plugin.

Meta keywords are all but useless, but not entirely. Google and Bing don’t care, but some networking and sharing sites do.

I “noindex” the tag archives because I don’t want the search engines finding each page twice. Identical pages with different addresses will register as two pages with Google. How does it know which one I consider most important? It doesn’t, so I don’t give it the option of indexing my tag archives.

Contact Form 7

This is just a free and easy contact form. I haven’t found anything better for the price.

WordPress Database Backup

Backups are important. Always back up your data. Do you want to spend 3 weeks building a site, just to have your server crash, killing everything? 5 minutes now will save hours or days of headache later.

SEO SearchTerms Tagging 2

When someone comes to your site from a search engine, this plugin takes the term they searched for and appends it in a list at the end of the post the visitor found. This reinforces your site as a good result for that search term. It also provides a handy list of the most popular search terms people use to find your site.

Conditional CAPTCHA for WordPress

I hate spam. If Akismet finds a spam comment being posted, this plugin will give the user a change to enter a CAPTCHA code to post the comment. Even if I turn off comments on a site, I keep this installed in case I ever change my mind. Real comments are good for SEO, so I occasionally test allowing the comments. I won’t waste the time moderating comments on a niche site, so this is a good compromise.

Date Exclusion SEO

If someone comes to a site and sees the last post was two years ago, they’ll leave. I don’t want a post to look like it’s outdated, so I suppress the dates.

Pretty Link Lite

This plugin lets me mask a link and set it to nofollow. Nofollow tells the search engines to discount the value of the link, which removes a spam-site indicator from their algorithms. Masking the link turns a messy affiliate link into a link that looks internal, making it easier for a visitor to click and allowing you to see how often a link is clicked.

Google XML Sitemaps

Making it easy for Google to find your entire site is a good thing. This plugin helps with that.

WP Policies

This plugin provides a long list of site policies, formatted for a WordPress page. The most important one is the disclaimer announcing the fact that your are making money on your site.

WP Super Cache

Super Cache creates a pre-generated copy of your page so the site doesn’t have to hit the database to rebuild it dynamically every time someone visits. It’s all about speed, which affects your search rank.

JetPack

I like using the WordPress.com stats instead of Google Analytics for most of my niche site. I don’t see a need to announce to Google that these 12 sites are owned by me, so I don’t. WordPress.com included their stats plugin in JetPack, then discontinued the standalone plugin, so I use JetPack.

Backup

If I subscribe to my own feed, I get every post in Google Reader. That means I don’t need to make a daily backup of any of my sites. For the amount of changes I make to my niche sites, weekly might still be overkill, but that’s what I do. I get the backups by email so I have a copy somewhere other than the host. I don’t believe in letting anyone control my money but me.

Settings

Discussion

Most comments to niche sites are spam comments, so I hide them without actually turning them off. Sometimes I test letting the comments through, because some niches might have great people that want to post good comments. I haven’t had a lot of luck with that, on my niche sites.

Permalinks

The default permalink structure is absolutely not recommended for search engine purposes. It’s also harder for someone to mention. I don’t put dates in the link for the same reason I hide dates in the posts: I don’t want anything to look outdated.

Menus

I keep the navigation menu simple. It has three purposes:

Link to the page that’s designed to make money.
Link to the pages that show Google and readers it is an active site.
Link to the disclaimer that keeps my butt away from federal fines.

Anything else is wasted space.

Widgets

On my niche sites, I use widgets to help with navigation and to point people to the pages that will make the most money. I haven’t addressed how I do the second part yet, because I haven’t created those pages yet.

Posts

Right now, http://www.masterweddingplanning.net/ has exactly one post, and it’s a duplicated post from eZineArticles. It has served its purpose. This site is fully indexed by Google.

When I get the rest of the content written, I’ll delete that post.

There you have it, the reasons behind every choice I make during site creation. Did I miss anything? Do you have any other questions?

Carnival Roundup: Bully Edition

Life, Parenting

My mother-in-law’s house is ready. The walls are painted, the hardwood floors have been sanded and polished, the carpets have been cleaned. Now, we just have to get the lease signed and let the renters in.

A school bus photographed in New York, New Yor... — A school bus photographed in New York, New York. Bus is a 2000-2001 Carpenter Classic 2000 body with an International 3800 chassis. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

This week, we had our first real bullying incident on the school bus. I guess one of the benefits of having a kid who is the biggest in the school is that nobody punches him. My daughter doesn’t have that benefit. She was punched and pushed for being in the wrong seat on the bus a couple of days ago. Thankfully, the school dealt with it quickly. The bus is equipped with video and the little girl copped to it. She’s s off of the bus for a few days and her parents have been informed. Unfortunately, her twin sister seems to be the vengeful type. She came home yesterday lying about how my daughter behaved on the bus and got another little girl to lie about getting hit and bit by my daughter in school yesterday.

How do I know it’s all lies?

First, my daughter didn’t ride the bus yesterday afternoon. She was scared in the morning, so I promised to pick her up from school. Hard to misbehave on the bus when she was cuddling with her mother on the couch. The other little girl–who goes to daycare with the twins just up the street from our daycare provider (who happens to be the grandmother of the twins)–recanted once she was away from the vengeful twin. Her mother filled us in last night. I’m not a fan of a grandmother defending a kid’s lies. No kids are angels, but helping them lie doesn’t make them better people.

Live Real, Now was included in the following carnivals recently:

I’m aware that I’ve been a bit of a slacker about posting these links. My apologies to everyone who deserved a link but didn’t get it in a timely manner.

Yakezie Carnival hosted by Narrow Bridge

Finance Carnival for Young Adults hosted by Finance Product Reviews

Carnival of Financial Planning hosted by Family Money Values

Yakezie Carnival hosted by Moneywise Pastor

Lifestyle Carnival hosted by Vanessa’s Money

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by See Debt Run

Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #64 hosted by Master the Art of Saving

Carnival of Retirement #52 hosted by Master the Art of Saving

Yakezie Carnival hosted by Your PF Pro

Lifestyle Carnival #33 hosted by Lifestyle Carnival

Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #62 hosted by Savvy Scot

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Debt Black Hole

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Making Sense of Cents

Lifestyle Carnival #31 hosted by Vanessa’s Money

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by The Frugal Toad

Money Mail Carnival #5 hosted by The Money Mail

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Vanessa’s Money

Money Mail Carnival #4 hosted by The Money Mail

Finance Carnival for Young Adults #39 hosted by 20s Finances

Yakezie Carnival hosted by My Family Finances

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Growing Money Smart

Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #57 hosted by My University Money

Money Mail Carnival #3 hosted by The Money Mail

Yakezie Carnival hosted by I Heart Budgets

Carnival of Retirement #46 hosted by Making Sense of Cents

Yakezie Carnival hosted by The Ultimate Juggle

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by My Multiple Incomes

Carnival of Financial Planning hosted by Master the Art of Saving

Money Mail Carnival #2 hosted by The Money Mail

Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #56 hosted by See Debt Run

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Finance Product Reviews

Yakezie Carnival hosted by Parenting and Money

Lifestyle Carnival #27 hosted by Femme Frugality

Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #55 hosted by My University Money

Yakezie Carnival hosted by The Ultimate Juggle

Lifestyle Carnival #26 hosted by Mo Money Mo Houses

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Debt Black Hole

Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #54 hosted by Cash Net USA

Carnival of Financial Planning hosted by Young Family Finances

Yakezie Carnival hosted by Portfolio Princess

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Thirty Six Months

Carnival of Retirement #41 hosted by Financial Conflict Coach

Lifestyle Carnival hosted by Master the Art of Savings

Yakezie Carnival hosted by Cult of Money

Lifestyle Carnival hosted by Blue Collar Workman