Happy Hanuchristmakwanzivus.
Family and travel. No posts today.
Make the most of the holiday.
Posting rate
For the new year, I am setting a new posting schedule.
I’ve been posting for a month, and started with half a dozen articles. There is a decent base of reading material. Now, I need to be posting at a sustainable level that will allow me time with my family and allow me to pursue some opportunities.
From now on, I will be posting 3 times each week. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. There will still be other miscellaneous updates, especially regarding my year of 30-Day Projects. The twitter summary on Saturday is automated.
Happy New Year!
Decluttering the House – April 30 Day Project Update
My 30 Day Project for April is to declutter my entire house. That’s every room, every dresser, every drawer. We’ve got 12 years of jointly accumulated clutter.
Our progress so far has been wonderful. The main level of our house is almost done.
In our daughters’ room, we put in bunk beds and pulled out a dresser. With the crib, changing table, and toddler bed removed, they actually have room to play on the floor. Their closet has been emptied and repurposed as scrapbooking and blanket storage. Cost: $140 for the bunk beds.
Our son’s room has had a dresser, a desk, and a bed replaced with a loft bed. Even with the 6 foot tall monstrosity of a bed, his room looks so much bigger. We still have to clean out his closet, which is mostly artifacts of a business we no longer have, leftovers from when his bedroom was our office. Cost: $260 for the loft bed.
Our room was depressing. Never dirty, but oh-so-full. The closet was jam-packed. The top shelf was full of towels and sheets. The closet rod couldn’t fit another shirt. There was a modular shelving system on the floor of the closet–full. We had three full dressers. The headboard has 5 foot tall cabinets, half of which were full of makeup and jewelry, the other half with books. Now, there is 1 empty dresser. It belonged to my great-grandmother, so it’s going to the shop to be refinished, instead of the garage sale to be sold. Another dresser has spare room in it. There’s no need to rearrange the cabinets to get to anything. The closet is less than half full and there is almost nothing on the floor of the closet. Gear for my side-line business is stored out of sight and out of the way. This is so much more relaxing.
We’ve tackled the kitchen, except for 1 cabinet, which is mostly cookbooks and booze. That will be fun to clean out.
Our front closet was worthless. It was so full we put hooks on the outside of the door to hang our coats. We pulled out a dozen coats we never wear. At least 20 pairs of shoes, some belonging to roommates gone 1o years. We can actually use the closet now. The shoes and boots all have homes. Our coats all fit…inside.
We have 1 closet and 1 cabinet left to address on the main level. There are also 3 small rooms in the basement that need to be gutted–the laundry room, the family room, and a room that has been designated for storage and the litter box. The last one will be the hardest. It’s full of remnants of hobbies past and failed ventures. I’m expecting some fights, flowing every possible direction.
In the process, we’ve filled our dining room with stuff for our garage sale…twice. It’s all getting priced and boxed as we go through it. We thrown away anything we won’t be able to sell. We’ve done all of this with the mutual understanding that nothing is coming back in the house. After the sale, it will be donated or sold on Craigslist, but it won’t become a part of our lives again. We are successfully purging so much. The “skinny clothes” are gone. When the time comes, they’ll be replaced. In the meantime, they can be put to better use on someone else. Hobbies that never took, games that are never played, it’s all going. We are getting down to the things that are actually used and useful.
It’s interesting to note that the process is getting easier as the month goes by. My Mother-in-Law is a hoarder. Those habits get passed down, but what was originally a source of stress has turned into a pleasant chore.
The most wonderful discovery of all? It turns out we don’t need a better storage system, we just need less stuff.
Update: This post has been included in the Money Hacks Carnival.
Friends and Acquaintances
“Friends help you move. Good friends help you move bodies.”
-unknown
Some people have dozens of friends. I’m not that guy.
I have 6.
Everybody in the world can be divided into 4 categories.
- Strangers. A xenophobe’s nightmare. These are the people you don’t know, whether they are passing you on the sidewalk, or newborns on the opposite side of the world.
- Acquaintances. These are the people you’ve met, mostly in passing. They tend not to have much effect on your life. You may pass a friendly bus ride in conversation, but it’s nothing that sticks. A waitress, the clerk at the store, a friend’s latest date; these are the people you interact with for just a moment and rarely think about further.
- Friendlies. Most people call these folks friends. I don’t. I’m friendly with them, hence the name, but it’s not true friendship. Often, they are either my wife’s friends, or my friends’ wives. Sometimes, they are a friend of a friend that I only see at parties, or a coworker that I get along with, but never see outside of work. We’re friendly, but not obliged. I may help with some things, but it’s not necessarily a priority. I’ll go to a funeral, but probably won’t help plan it.
- Friends. To me, calling someone a friend is a big deal. I’m willing to do a lot for my friends. They are able to command large amounts of my time, and ask any number of favors. If needed, I’ll open my home or help demolish their’s. Loyalty, honesty, trust, respect, and companionship are all a part of my definition of a friend. If a friend needs help, I’ll come running. In return, I expect the same.
Family tends to fall into the same analogous categories.
It sounds cold, but I hesitate to let people graduate into the final category. My wife used to try to “set me up” with people that she thought I’d like to be friends with, thinking I was sad to have so few friends. It took years for her to realize that I was happy. It’s a matter of quality over quantity. Most of the friends I have, I’ve had for 10 years or more. I’ve known each of them for at least 5 years, not that time is a requirement.
Moving people into the “friends” category is a lot like dating. You get along, so you invite the potential friends out for a drink, one on one. You feel them out to see if they are compatible. You meet their families, share some food, build some history. If it all works out, eventually, you consider them a true friend, even if you couldn’t mark the date of the transition.
You wouldn’t marry everyone you date, so why would turn everyone you basically get along with into a friend?
Do you have a lot of friends? What marks friendship for you?
Appearances Matter
As my wife ramps up her job search, I’m reminded of this post and decided to bring it to the forefront.
A few weeks ago, I took my son out to my favorite Chinese buffet. There were two women there with names tattooed on their eyelids.
When you have someone’s name tattooed on your eyelids, you are limiting your job prospects to tattoo-shop employee or drug mule. You have disqualified yourself from a burger-flipping career.
When I turned 21, I had 13 piercings in my face and dyed-black hair past my ribs. Everybody is the factory I worked in got used to my bullring in time.
When my son was born, I decided I’d had enough of 12 hour graveyard shifts and not seeing my family, so I pulled out my piercings, put on a nice shirt, and got a corporate-style job in a call center.
Within a week or two, I put most of my piercings back in, and let everyone get used to it.
Six years later, I got laid off, and again, took out my piercings to look for work.
Appearances matter.
I know, for certain, that I wouldn’t have the job I have right now if I still had long hair and enough metal in my face to get me “special” attention at the airport.
A ring of steel through your nose kills the first impression in a business environment.
When you are walking into a situation for the first time, it’s important to pay attention to the persona you are projecting. Ladies, if the gentleman in the picture showed up for a blind date, would you be inclined to go anywhere with him? Men, would you expect anyone to go anywhere with you, if this was you?
Visible tattoos are called job-stoppers for a reason. If you can’t cover them with normal office attire, you won’t get hired in a professional setting. If that fact is a surprise to you, your lack of judgement means you wouldn’t be a good hire, anyway.
Like it or not, people make most of their decisions about others in the first few minutes of meeting them. Some studies show that it’s done in the first 30 seconds. If that time is spent on your facial art, the expletives on your t-shirt, or the briefness of your skirt, don’t expect to have anything else matter. You may be a genius, but your potential boss will never know that because you’ll be out on your butt before they have a chance to look at your resume.
Say Please
This is a guest post/reader story from a good friend of mine.
Greetings,
As a long time reader of Live Real Now, I’ve enjoyed the advice and the step by step, “I’ve been there” advice from Jason. Sadly, until now I haven’t really taken much of it. It was too much work. It was too hard. But the recent “Future Me” post really struck home so I looked for something that should be easy.
What I found was the concept of “Call and Ask”. I took a look at all of my accounts and utilities to decide which ones I was willing to change, drop, or reduce. The two I came up with were Dish Network and CenturyLink DSL.
My plan was simple:
- Look for their introductory offers
- Compare to my current price
- Call
- Ask if existing customers are as important as NEW customers
- Finally, be nice!
I started with CenturyLink since I needed to call them for a new modem in anyway. We’ve been with CenturyLink for years and I’ve been paying $34.99 for slow DSL and using it a couple times a week to work from home. Their new customer promotion is $19.99 for the faster service. I’d love to give you my script but I don’t entirely remember what I said. I believe I asked if they would extend the new customer rate to me and for how long. I know I pointed out that I would be out 3-5 days of internet service so now was the time to start trying to lower my bills. The customer service rep was actually pretty cool about it.
“Let me look at your account. We can offer you that rate for 12 months. After that the rate will be $54.99.”
That seems like a short term win for a long term loss, right?
His followup comment was golden: “Call us back in 12 months and see what specials we can offer you then.” So I went into Google Calendars and set myself a reminder 10.5 months from now.
Net effect: $15/month saved.
Next step: Dish Network.
We’re getting the Family Package which is already pretty inexpensive for Dish. Looking around, the new subscriber price was $5 less.
Same plan.
“Hello, I’m a long term subscriber. I see that you’re offering new subscribers the same package for less. Could you extend that offer to me?”
Same response… “Sure, you can have a $5 discount for 6 months.” Again, I set a Google Calendar reminder, this time for 4.5 months out.
Net effect: $20/month saved.
Can this go farther?
I recently purchased 3 pairs of F.O.M work jeans from Duluth Trading Company. Yes, they’re expensive, but they fit and last a long time. I’m not a small guy. (Ed. Welcome to the club!) Anyway, at the time their sale looked good: $10 off each pair when you order 3 or more. Coincidentally, I was down to a single pair after a deer hunting accident. (Don’t tie your jeans into your boots while field dressing a deer. You’ll stretch and then things get a bit breezy.) With $5 shipping, I saved $35 on that order for jeans I needed anyway.
I thought I’d done pretty well.
Fast forward to today where I see 20% off on everything and free shipping. And they’re still offering the $10 off deal I already used. I called Duluth Trading Company, and explained I was VERY happy with their pants and enjoyed the sale but was wondering if they’d please extend the 20% off sale to my prior order since it was so recent.
$23.70 back in my account.
Easy as pie and a polite: “Thank you for offering us the chance to make you happy with the transaction, sir.”
So, 3 nice phone calls, net effect:
Immediate: $23.70 in my pocket
Short term: $30 savings over the next 6 months
Long Term: $180 Savings over the next year
Total Savings: $233.75 for 15 minutes work
