News flash!
Incubating my third half-clone was my major motivation to get out of debt. I wasn’t sure how we were going to be able afford her without pawning one of her kidneys.
We managed, though. She’s intact.
The idea of squeezing a fourth little monster into our budget scared me right out of the gene pool. I got a vasectomy.
Interesting fact: When the doctor says “I’m going to cut your vas deferens, now. It’s going to feel like you got kicked in the crotch, but don’t move”, he’s right. It does. And you shouldn’t. My doctor complimented me on my ability to not flinch. I reminded him that he had my fun bits in one hand and a scalpel in the other. That’s a sure way to have both my attention and my obedience.
It costs money to have a baby, particularly if you do so in a hospital. Our cheapest birth cost us $250 out-of-pocket, but that was because my wife was covered by two health insurance plans. Adding her to my plan for a couple of months cost us a few hundred in premiums. We’ll call it $500 to get the baby into the world.
My vasectomy cost $125 out-of-pocket. That’s easy math.
What if you don’t have insurance, or are covered by a lousy plan? Baby #2 fit that category. We got a bill for $8500. After begging the charity department of the hospital for help, our actual out-of-pocket was about $2500.
The bill cost of my vasectomy was $1500. Again, easy math.
Clearly, getting snipped is cheaper than having a baby, even without considering food, diapers, crib, nanny-dog, toys, padded cardboard boxes for those rare date-nights, and everything else that you have to spend with a baby.
But wait, what about condoms?
While I find it odd that you can buy condoms online, I will use Amazon’s numbers.
You can buy a pack of 72 condoms for about $18, $15 if you use Subscribe-And-Save. That brings the price down to 21 cents per condom. According to Amazon, the most popular subscription option is one delivery every five months, which comes out to one condom every other day.
If that’s you, then yay!
At $15 per delivery, it would take 9 deliveries to make up the cost of an insurance-covered vasectomy. According to Amazon, that would take 45 months, or almost 4 years.
Without insurance, it would take 41 years to make up the difference.
Condoms are cheaper.
On the other hand, a vasectomy is pretty well guaranteed. I went to the best I could find. No back-alley doctor with a hedge-clipper for me. He guaranteed his work, provided I came in for two follow-up visits to check his work.
Now, I have no risk of expanding the budget for another ankle-biter and I don’t have to worry about random 3AM trips to the pharmacy.