- RT @bargainr: Life in North Korea is absolutely dreadful http://nyti.ms/dAcL26 #
- RT @bitfs: Weekly Favorites and Gratitude!: My Favorite Posts this Week Jeff at Deliver Away Debt threw together the .. http://bit.ly/9J0gGo #
- @LiveRealNow is giving away a copy of Delivering Happiness(@dhbook). Follow and RT to enter. http://bit.ly/czd31X # #
- Baseless claims, biased assumptions, poor understanding of history. Don't bother. #AnimalSpirits #KeynesianCult #
- RT @zappos: Super exciting! "Delivering Happiness" hit #1 on NY Times Bestseller list! Thanks everyone! Details: http://bit.ly/96vEfF #
- @ericabiz Funny, we found a kitten in a box last week. Unfortunately, it was abandoned there, not playing. Now, we have a 5th cat. in reply to ericabiz #
Integrity
The true measure of a man’s integrity is not what he will do, but rather what he won’t do.
-Flannery O’Connor
Have you watched a TV lately? Have you noticed that most sitcoms are based entirely on dishonesty? If the characters would stop lying to each other, the premise of most shows would fall apart. How much humor can be found in getting caught in a lie, week after week? If I lived in one of those homes, there would be a divorce happening immediately. There’s no integrity in any of the relationships.
Integrity means no lying, cheating, or stealing. It means you deal with everyone honestly and honorably. You don’t cheat on your wife, or make BS excuses to your kids. You have to make sure you have nothing to feel guilty about and expect the same from the people you deal with. It’s not always easy. If a waitress accidentally forgets to ring up a meal, or a store clerk only rings up one DVD, or the scanner borks itself and give an extra 50% off, you speak up, even if it costs $100. That’s honesty.
Ultimately, what you do during the day, you have to sleep with at night. This includes avoiding responsibilities. Always do what you say, barring forgetfulness, and in that case, make up for it immediately. Don’t break promises, don’t skip out on debts, and don’t get into commitments you have no intention of honoring.
I’ve discovered that the best way to keep your stories straight is to only tell the truth. I don’t have to coordinate an alibi or remember which lie I told to which person if I am honest in all of my dealings. It’s not the easy path. It would be easier to sneak large purchases into the house, or tell my wife I was working late instead of going out for a beer. There are a lot of shortcuts I refuse to take with my life. People act like I’m stupid because I won’t cheat anyone. I enjoy being treated like that, because it means I know who to avoid in the future. If you break promises, lie, cheat, steal, or skip out on your responsibilities, I don’t want to associate with you. Honesty is an important part of my life and relationships. I won’t apologize for that.
What are your core values?
The Secret to Fearless Change
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you’ll be walking cross the floor
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you’ll be walking out the door
You never will get where you’re going
If you never get up on your feet
Come on, there’s a good tail wind blowing
A fast walking man is hard to beat
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you’ll be walking cross the floor
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you’ll be walking out the door
If you want to change your direction
If your time of life is at hand
Well don’t be the rule be the exception
A good way to start is to stand
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you’ll be walking cross the floor
Put one foot in front of the other
And soon you’ll be walking out the door
If I want to change the reflection
I see in the mirror each morn
You mean that it’s just my election
To vote for a chance to be reborn
May 30 Day Project
Before I discuss May’s 30 day project, I’m going to talk about April’s.
Last month, my goal was to declutter my entire house. Every room, every closet, every drawer.
I missed the goal.
My wife has gotten behind this project wholeheartedly. She’s had friends over helping almost every weekend. She’s kept the kids occupied while I’ve been working on it. It’s been a team effort, which has been nice. One room at a time, we’ve tackled the entire house, except for a couple of spots.
Our son’s closet isn’t finished. He hasn’t had use of his closet since we moved him into the room he’s in. It’s been the filing center for a couple of business opportunities. Most of it has been cleared out, but not all. It will be finished in the next few days.
Our storage room isn’t done. It pains me to have a “storage room”, but I don’t think its purpose will be changing. Now, however, instead of unopened appliances and boxes of clothes, it’s almost down to just seasonal stuff and things we do need occasionally. We have the Christmas decorations, the pet crates, and a few other things that get used rarely, but do get used. This room used to have a 6-foot cabinet of computer parts, leftover from the days when building/supporting computers was my main side-hustle. That has been reduce to just one box, mostly power cords. The gaming pads and old hard drives are gone. All that’s left for this room is one shelf, and the remainder of another old side-hustle that has some emotional attachment for my wife.
The remaining trouble spots will be cleaned out by this weekend. We’re having a garage sale the following weekend, and it will all be there. We’ve been pricing as we’ve been sorting, so we’re almost ready.
Decluttering an entire house that’s been filled by the horrible habits of two accumulators means we literally have thousands of things we’ll be selling in two weeks. We split our garage with our roommmate. Our stall is full. We’ve got some stuff in the driveway. We’ve got a pile of boxes in the basement, ready to go. Our dining room is full.
Let me repeat that last point: Our dining room is full.
My project for May was supposed to have been having dinner at the table at least 3 nights per week. At the moment, I’m not entirely sure we still have a table. I certainly can’t see it and there is no way to use it for dinner. This project has to be moved.
So, what’s the plan for May? I’m going to tackle June’s project.
I will not use the computer while anyone else is awake, except for household necessities. Household necessities on the computer are almost nonexistent, since I’ve automated almost everything. I balance the checkbook on a monthly basis, and may have to pay a quarterly bill later this month. I’m going to take the time to be with my family, and do something that matters more than Google Reader. That means writing happens after everyone goes to bed, or at 5AM, which will be motivation to keep that wake-up time. Internet on the blackberry counts as computer use.
Family first.
Twitter Weekly Updates for 2010-06-05
- Working on my day off and watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. #
- Sushi-coma time. #
- To all the vets who have given their lives to make our way of life possible: Thank you. #
- RT @jeffrosecfp: While you're grilling out tomorrow, REMEMBER what the day is really for http://bit.ly/abE4ms #neverforget #
- Once again, taps and guns keep me from staying dry-eyed. #
- RT @bargainr: Live in an urban area & still use a Back Porch Compost Tumbler to fertilize your garden (via @diyNatural) http://bit.ly/9sQFCC #
- RT @Matt_SF: RT @thegoodhuman President Obama quietly lifted a brief ban on drilling in shallow water last week. http://bit.ly/caDELy #
- Thundercats is coming back! #
- In real life, vampires only sparkle when they are on fire. -Larry Correia #
- Wife found a kitten abandoned in a taped-shut box. Welcome Cat #5 #
A Well-Trained Husband
I am so well-trained.
I was more than a bit wild when I was younger. For the most part, that ended when my son was born. When you procreate, it’s time to put the wild on a shelf and become a reliable provider. That’s just the way it is. Anybody who prioritizes the wild over the progeny needs to be forcibly sterilized and exiled before be sold for parts.
When my mother-in-law got a membership to Sam’s Club, she gave my wife the second card, so we effectively have a membership. For those who don’t know, Sam’s Club is a warehouse store that has some incredibly good deals and a lot of things that look like good deals because you are buying in bulk.
The thing I hate most about warehouse stores is the default accusation of theft when you leave. They require you to line up so the the person by the door can look at your receipt and pretend to count what’s in your cart while they are really scanning for the most-stolen items in the store and ignoring the rest. The only thing they really accomplish is making all of their customer feel like thieves.
I used to bypass the line and the checker and just leave. My wife got sick of the indignant screeches coming from the store as we left. Eventually she got me to stop.
Last night, I went back to pick up supplies for a fund-raiser I’m helping to organize on Sunday. I went with one of the other organizers, who had some personal shopping to do later. We checked out using his account and he paid, while I took the food home to keep until Sunday. Since he’ll be getting reimbursed for the food, he kept the receipt while I headed for the door. Anybody see the problem here?
When the receipt-checker challenged me, I docilely stepped to the side and called my friend to bring the receipt to the door. I hate the feeling of submitting to authority, especially when the authority is pretending to be customer service. I just calmly did what the door-cop told me, just like my wife wanted, even though she wasn’t there.
I hate warehouse stores.