- RT @kristinbrianne: You won't believe it… I just entered to win the #KodakSweeps on http://tweetphoto.com/contest Pls RT #
- RT @wilw The single most insulting thing you can tell a creative person is, upon viewing their creation, "you have too much free time." #
- Hmm. I share a birthday with Linus Torvalds. #
- @freefrombroke I'm following you and would love to be followed back. in reply to freefrombroke #
- RT: @SuburbanDollar: New Post: : The Art of Delayed Gratification http://bit.ly/5gsKXy #
- RT @FrugalYankee: #NEWYear's #QUOTE: All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening. ~ Alexander Woollcott #
- Crackberry is certainly accurate. I may be too connected. #
- MIL thinks a Kitchenaid stand mixer will make it easier to remove the snow in the driveway. Bad logic, but she's buying one for us, anyway. #
- What magic is in a saw-palmetto capsule and why does my prostate need the power of 1000 of them? #
- RT: @SuburbanDollar: Sounds like he's asking you to rent him a date. #
- RT @hughdeburgh: "I'd rather die fighting for freedom than live as a slave." ~ Judge Andrew Napolitano #Iran #in2010 #USA #
- Happy New Year, 3 minutes early. #
- Billy Jack vs Chuck Norris. Winner? #
- Getting my hair brushed by an 18 month old while watching Married With Children. It's a good evening. #
- RT @FrugalYankee: #NEWYEARS #QUOTE: The most important political office is that of private citizen. ~ Louis Brandeis #
- RT @ScottATaylor: 40,697 Laws Take Effect Today http://ff.im/-dFXNR #
- 5AM. It'd be so easy to go right back to sleep. #
Link Roundup
In an effort to make sure that both of my readers can’t possibly miss the things I think are important, I’m going to start doing a weekly roundup of the best of the internet. Judged solely, and arbitrarily, by me.
On topic:
These, naturally, are the posts that fit the theme of this site.
How To Check Your Federal IRS Tax Refund Status. When I checked a couple of days ago, they were about 2 weeks out.
TurboTax has screwed up the property tax refund form for Minnesota. Thankfully, I haven’t filed this, yet, but I did verify the problem.
Where do you want to be in 5 years? Start taking those steps, now, or you will never get there. Find something, no matter how small, and do it.
Deficit Neutrality doesn’t count, if a massive initial purchase is offset by future intentions to cut spending.
Off topic:
This is just some of the random crap I think is worth sharing.
If you’re going to argue on the internet, make sure you have your sources right. Primary sources are better than secondary.
Bring back dueling to ensure good manners.
Here’s a guide to saving water-damaged books.
I am a shameless geek and reformed DnD player, so this room was exciting to see.
Friends and Acquaintances
“Friends help you move. Good friends help you move bodies.”
-unknown
Some people have dozens of friends. I’m not that guy.
I have 6.
Everybody in the world can be divided into 4 categories.
- Strangers. A xenophobe’s nightmare. These are the people you don’t know, whether they are passing you on the sidewalk, or newborns on the opposite side of the world.
- Acquaintances. These are the people you’ve met, mostly in passing. They tend not to have much effect on your life. You may pass a friendly bus ride in conversation, but it’s nothing that sticks. A waitress, the clerk at the store, a friend’s latest date; these are the people you interact with for just a moment and rarely think about further.
- Friendlies. Most people call these folks friends. I don’t. I’m friendly with them, hence the name, but it’s not true friendship. Often, they are either my wife’s friends, or my friends’ wives. Sometimes, they are a friend of a friend that I only see at parties, or a coworker that I get along with, but never see outside of work. We’re friendly, but not obliged. I may help with some things, but it’s not necessarily a priority. I’ll go to a funeral, but probably won’t help plan it.
- Friends. To me, calling someone a friend is a big deal. I’m willing to do a lot for my friends. They are able to command large amounts of my time, and ask any number of favors. If needed, I’ll open my home or help demolish their’s. Loyalty, honesty, trust, respect, and companionship are all a part of my definition of a friend. If a friend needs help, I’ll come running. In return, I expect the same.
Family tends to fall into the same analogous categories.
It sounds cold, but I hesitate to let people graduate into the final category. My wife used to try to “set me up” with people that she thought I’d like to be friends with, thinking I was sad to have so few friends. It took years for her to realize that I was happy. It’s a matter of quality over quantity. Most of the friends I have, I’ve had for 10 years or more. I’ve known each of them for at least 5 years, not that time is a requirement.
Moving people into the “friends” category is a lot like dating. You get along, so you invite the potential friends out for a drink, one on one. You feel them out to see if they are compatible. You meet their families, share some food, build some history. If it all works out, eventually, you consider them a true friend, even if you couldn’t mark the date of the transition.
You wouldn’t marry everyone you date, so why would turn everyone you basically get along with into a friend?
Do you have a lot of friends? What marks friendship for you?
Say Please
This is a guest post/reader story from a good friend of mine.
Greetings,
As a long time reader of Live Real Now, I’ve enjoyed the advice and the step by step, “I’ve been there” advice from Jason. Sadly, until now I haven’t really taken much of it. It was too much work. It was too hard. But the recent “Future Me” post really struck home so I looked for something that should be easy.
What I found was the concept of “Call and Ask”. I took a look at all of my accounts and utilities to decide which ones I was willing to change, drop, or reduce. The two I came up with were Dish Network and CenturyLink DSL.
My plan was simple:
- Look for their introductory offers
- Compare to my current price
- Call
- Ask if existing customers are as important as NEW customers
- Finally, be nice!
I started with CenturyLink since I needed to call them for a new modem in anyway. We’ve been with CenturyLink for years and I’ve been paying $34.99 for slow DSL and using it a couple times a week to work from home. Their new customer promotion is $19.99 for the faster service. I’d love to give you my script but I don’t entirely remember what I said. I believe I asked if they would extend the new customer rate to me and for how long. I know I pointed out that I would be out 3-5 days of internet service so now was the time to start trying to lower my bills. The customer service rep was actually pretty cool about it.
“Let me look at your account. We can offer you that rate for 12 months. After that the rate will be $54.99.”
That seems like a short term win for a long term loss, right?
His followup comment was golden: “Call us back in 12 months and see what specials we can offer you then.” So I went into Google Calendars and set myself a reminder 10.5 months from now.
Net effect: $15/month saved.
Next step: Dish Network.
We’re getting the Family Package which is already pretty inexpensive for Dish. Looking around, the new subscriber price was $5 less.
Same plan.
“Hello, I’m a long term subscriber. I see that you’re offering new subscribers the same package for less. Could you extend that offer to me?”
Same response… “Sure, you can have a $5 discount for 6 months.” Again, I set a Google Calendar reminder, this time for 4.5 months out.
Net effect: $20/month saved.
Can this go farther?
I recently purchased 3 pairs of F.O.M work jeans from Duluth Trading Company. Yes, they’re expensive, but they fit and last a long time. I’m not a small guy. (Ed. Welcome to the club!) Anyway, at the time their sale looked good: $10 off each pair when you order 3 or more. Coincidentally, I was down to a single pair after a deer hunting accident. (Don’t tie your jeans into your boots while field dressing a deer. You’ll stretch and then things get a bit breezy.) With $5 shipping, I saved $35 on that order for jeans I needed anyway.
I thought I’d done pretty well.
Fast forward to today where I see 20% off on everything and free shipping. And they’re still offering the $10 off deal I already used. I called Duluth Trading Company, and explained I was VERY happy with their pants and enjoyed the sale but was wondering if they’d please extend the 20% off sale to my prior order since it was so recent.
$23.70 back in my account.
Easy as pie and a polite: “Thank you for offering us the chance to make you happy with the transaction, sir.”
So, 3 nice phone calls, net effect:
Immediate: $23.70 in my pocket
Short term: $30 savings over the next 6 months
Long Term: $180 Savings over the next year
Total Savings: $233.75 for 15 minutes work
What to Take Away From John Cleese’s Divorce
If you haven’t been kept under a rock your whole life, you’re likely familiar with actor and comedian John Cleese. Part of the infamous Monty Python crew, he starred in films such as Monty Python’s Quest for the Holy Grail, and television shows such as Faulty Towers. However, are you familiar with what has happened to Mr. Cleese financially over the past few years?
When Cleese divorced his third wife she ended up with a divorce settlement that quite literally made her richer than him, despite the fact that they were married for only 16 years and had produced no children.
Divorce is, unfortunately, a fixture of modern society, and people of both sexes need to know how they can protect their personal finances in case of a divorce. After all, these days more than 50% of marriages end in divorce, so not preparing yourself financially for it is engaging is some rather wishful thinking. So how best to protect yourself and your personal finances, should you be unfortunate enough to have to go through one?
If you are the higher-earning party, get a pre-nup prior to marriage; this simply cannot be overemphasized. Cleese himself, already married to wife number four, incidentally, was told that he should have her sign a prenuptial agreement, he initially didn’t want to, despite having just been taken to the proverbial cleaners. He only reluctantly had one written up when his legal team essentially insisted. Even though prenups can be challenged or modified in court, if you are the party bringing more assets to the relationship, it is irresponsible of you not to solicit a prenuptial agreement from a potential spouse.
Another thing to keep in mind is that you should protect assets you have in joint accounts with your spouse, and also begin to actively monitor your credit, if things become acrimonious between you two. This way, you will prevent them from absconding with the totality of your shared funds, or ruining your credit if they are feeling malicious. If you need further information on how to do this properly, speak with a qualified financial planner.
So if you find yourself considering marriage and either have significant assets to protect or suspect you might have them in the future, you owe it to yourself to look into the legalities surrounding prenuptial agreements, and other thorny issues related to personal finance. Failure to do so can end up seriously impacting your life in a negative way, should you ever be faced with a vindictive or greedy spouse; protect yourself!
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Integrity
The true measure of a man’s integrity is not what he will do, but rather what he won’t do.
-Flannery O’Connor
Have you watched a TV lately? Have you noticed that most sitcoms are based entirely on dishonesty? If the characters would stop lying to each other, the premise of most shows would fall apart. How much humor can be found in getting caught in a lie, week after week? If I lived in one of those homes, there would be a divorce happening immediately. There’s no integrity in any of the relationships.
Integrity means no lying, cheating, or stealing. It means you deal with everyone honestly and honorably. You don’t cheat on your wife, or make BS excuses to your kids. You have to make sure you have nothing to feel guilty about and expect the same from the people you deal with. It’s not always easy. If a waitress accidentally forgets to ring up a meal, or a store clerk only rings up one DVD, or the scanner borks itself and give an extra 50% off, you speak up, even if it costs $100. That’s honesty.
Ultimately, what you do during the day, you have to sleep with at night. This includes avoiding responsibilities. Always do what you say, barring forgetfulness, and in that case, make up for it immediately. Don’t break promises, don’t skip out on debts, and don’t get into commitments you have no intention of honoring.
I’ve discovered that the best way to keep your stories straight is to only tell the truth. I don’t have to coordinate an alibi or remember which lie I told to which person if I am honest in all of my dealings. It’s not the easy path. It would be easier to sneak large purchases into the house, or tell my wife I was working late instead of going out for a beer. There are a lot of shortcuts I refuse to take with my life. People act like I’m stupid because I won’t cheat anyone. I enjoy being treated like that, because it means I know who to avoid in the future. If you break promises, lie, cheat, steal, or skip out on your responsibilities, I don’t want to associate with you. Honesty is an important part of my life and relationships. I won’t apologize for that.
What are your core values?