Live Real, Now

The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.

Search Results for: three-alternatives-to-a-budget/budget-lesson-part-5/debt-burnout/subscribe-by-email/budget-lesson-part-2/573/budget-lesson-part-3/slow-carb-diet-how-to-avoid-going-bat-crazy/contact-me/what-happens-when-you-save/how-to-complain-the-squeaky-wheel-gets-the-grease

Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.
Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?
Me: Yes?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: May I ask what that was for?
FMe: Of course.
Me: What was that for, jerk?
FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.
Me: What?!?  I’ve never even met you, before.
FMe: Of course you have.  I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.
Me: Huh?
FMe: Listen close.  You’re not  the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.
Me: ???
FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.
Me: I don’t appreciate….
FMe: Shut up.  I was dumb then, too.  Remember?  You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year.  On top of many other expensive decisions.  Do your recall?
Me: Yes, I do.  So what?
FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car.  Your kids wear new clothes.  You’ve got a house full of new furniture.  How did you pay for all of that?
Me: Naturally, I charged it.  Zero payments, zero interest for a year!  Pretty smart, huh?
FMe: What happens in a year?
Me: I don’t know.  I’ve got a full year to figure that out.
FMe: <Slap!>  I’ll tell you what happens!  Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed!   Your raise didn’t come through.  You had a baby. The truck broke down.  Your wife took maternity leave.  A roommate moved out.  You took a loss in the stock market.  You didn’t plan!  You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.
Me: How was I to know?
FMe: <Slap!>  Life happens!  You never know what is coming next.  You need to plan and save for what might happen.  Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly.  That is not acceptable.
Me:  So?  What are you going to do about it?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: Really?  Again?
FMe: <Slap!>  I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help.  Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux.  My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford.   You’ve screwed me, dude.
Me: I’m sorry.  What can I do to fix it?
FMe: Buy me dinner, first.
Me: Huh?!?!?
FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change.  No credit.
Me: None?
FMe: None.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.  Only spend what you can afford. Budget.  Pay off those nasty bills.  Don’t leave me hanging.
Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?
FMe: Exactly.  That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence.  Live in the real world.
Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me!  Now I know.
FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

 

Teaching My Child about Money in a Way I Was Not Taught

Finance

When I was in high school and working 15 to 20 hours a week, my mom gave me free rein to use the money I earned as I would like.  Actually, she said nothing to me about saving for college or putting some money into savings.

When I had friends who complained that they had to put away some of their earnings, I commiserated with them.  How unfair of their parents to make them save some of their money!  They worked hard for their money, often at crappy part-time jobs.  They deserved to spend the money any way they saw fit.

The way I saw it, why save for college?  According to financial aid rules, if the student has any savings, she would have to use the majority of it to pay for college.  How unfair.  To add insult to injury, if prospective college students have some savings, they would qualify for less financial aid, which often meant fewer student loans.

The injustice. 

Yes, it was better to spend my hard earned money than save it and be penalized.

No one told me differently.  In fact, many people in my family agreed with me and encouraged me to buy a used car to get to and from my job.   Of course, I paid the loan payments for the car, the gas I used and my insurance out of money from my job.  That was a responsible use of money, but I also went out to eat with friends, a lot.  At 16, I was going out to eat with my friends twice a week at least.

However, my plan worked perfectly.  When I went to college, I didn’t have to use any of my hard earned cash.  No, not me, because I hadn’t saved anything.  Instead, I left college with nearly $20,000 in student loan debt.  I took two years off and paid down as much student loan debt as I could, getting it down to about $8,000, but then I went to graduate school and took on more student loan debt.  I graduated with nearly $25,000 in debt total.  I am still paying on it today, 13 years later.

Now that I am the parent, I am one of those “awful” parents who makes her kids save.  My son knows when he gets his allowance, some goes to save, some goes to donate, and some goes to spend.  True, it makes me cringe when he uses his spend money on little trinkets like temporary tattoos, stickers, and gum, but I keep silent.  He did the work to earn the money, and he can spend it as he likes.  However, I am inflexible with saving; that money must be set aside.  When he goes to college, I expect that he will have to use the majority of that money.  Rather than seeing it as a waste, I see it as an important component of his financial education.  Spending his money to pay a portion of his college education will hopefully make him take college more seriously.

Meanwhile, I have already begun having chats with him about money, spending, and budgeting.  He watches his dad and I work hard to pay down our debt with gazelle intensity.  He sees me use a calculator at the grocery store to see how much our groceries will be.

Ultimately, he will make his own financial decisions as he grows up, but I plan to teach him throughout these important years so that even if he turns into a spendthrift, he will have a firm financial understanding to revert to as he ages.  While my mom taught me how to stretch money further, she never taught me how to save; I hope saving is a lesson my son takes with him throughout his adulthood.

How do you teach your kids about money management?

Melissa writes at Fiscal Phoenix where she encourages people to rise from the ashes of their financial mistakes as she and her husband are doing.

Enhanced by Zemanta

Christmas for the Destitute

Finance, Parenting

First, my disclaimer:  I’m not destitute.

However, I’m trying to spend Christmas acting like I am a pauper.

Why, with small children and beautiful-and-more-than-deserving wife, would I want to deprive my family of a bountiful holiday?

Before we get into the reasons for being a horrible grinch bent on depriving my children of their god-given right to rampant consumerism, let’s look at the Philosophy of Destitution.

The primary reason to pull back and tone it down is basic frugality.  Excessive anything is not frugal. I am training my children–and for that matter, my wife and my self–in the finer arts of personal responsibility and frugality.   Accumulating debt for a fleeting holiday is insane.  If we can’t afford to buy it, we certainly can’t afford to give it.   Anything else would be setting a bad example and children learn best by example.

Another piece of the Philosophy of Destitution(when I read this word, I hear a deep, booming voice in my head, like a 30s radio superhero voiceover)  is “green”.    I consider myself a conservationalist rather than an environmentalist, so don’t read too much into that color.  I try to be responsible, instead of destructive and I try to avoid being wasteful.  Toys that won’t be played with are wasteful. A garbage can full of packaging for those same toys costs money.  It is much cheaper to avoid the landfill here.

Back to “Why”. Why would I be willing to deprive my family?

[Read more…] about Christmas for the Destitute

Festival of Frugality #278: The Pure Peer Pressure Edition

Misc

Peer Pressure
Peer Pressure

Welcome to the Festival of Frugality #278: The Pure Peer Pressure Edition.    If everyone else was jumping off of a cliff, would you do it, too?  Maybe not, but what happens if you surround yourself with people who hold the same values as you and are striving for personal growth in the same way?  Peer pressure doesn’t have to be negative.

“Peer pressure is not a monolithic force that presses adolescents into the same mold. . . . Adolescents generally choose friend whose values, attitudes, tastes, and families are similar to their own. In short, good kids rarely go bad because of their friends.” – Laurence Steinberg

Shameless plug:  If you like what you see, please take a moment to subscribe to Live Real, Now by email or RSS or follow us on Twitter.   All your friends are doing it.

Editor’s Picks:

Dinks Finance shows us a few ways to negotiate your mortgage fees.   Take a few minutes to read this post before you get a mortgage.

Money Ning reminds us that everyone needs a crappy job early in their working life.

Personal Finance by the Book is leading the fight against the 100,000 mile mindset.

Free Money Finance shows several ways to have fun dates on the cheap.   My secret is to make it look “creative” and “unique”  instead of “cheap”.  You don’t have to cave to the pressure of “expensive” to have a good time.

“Most literature on the culture of adolescence focuses on peer pressure as a negative force. Warnings about the “wrong crowd” read like tornado alerts in parent manuals. . . . It is a relative term that means different things in different places. In Fort Wayne, for example, the wrong crowd meant hanging out with liberal Democrats. In Connecticut, it meant kids who weren’t planning to get a Ph.D. from Yale.” – Mary Kay Blakely

The Best of the Rest:

Budgeting in the Fun Stuff talks about my favorite tax-funded institution: the Library.   I’ve easily save thousands of dollars since I started using the library consistently.

Babies are undeniably expensive.   Squirrelers provides some tips on limiting the early expenses.

“Don’t think you’re on the right road just because it’s a well-beaten path.”  – Author Unknown

Wealth Pilgrim shows how his daughter discover the secret to saving 80% on college costs.  The trick isn’t just going to a state school, but what you do when you get there.

ptMoney shares some copy-cat recipe sites.   I love making copy-cat meals with better quality ingredients for half the price.

“Every society honors its live conformists, and its dead troublemakers.”  – Mignon McLaughlin

Magical Penny recommends tracking your net worth.   Mint makes that easy to do.

Smart Wallet talks about going cash-only and the benefits of credit cards.  I am currently cash-only, but plan to transition to a good rewards card when all of the debt is gone.

Simple Life in France discusses radical simplicity and frugality in relationships.

“There’s one advantage to being 102. There’s no peer pressure.” – Dennis Wolfberg

I’m a bit of a foodie and more than a bit cheap, so when Not Made of Money talks about creative uses for some we stock up on, I’m listening.

Wanderlust Journey explains the Carnival Cruise loyalty program.  I’ve been on exactly one cruise and enjoyed it quite a bit.  It’s not the best method of travel for all possible destinations, but I can’t think of a better way to spend a couple of weeks in the Caribbean.

Beating Broke just saved a ton of money by switching to…wait, wrong venue.    Read how they saved money on a remodel.  Don’t be afraid to use your social capital–the skills of the people who care about you.

“If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.”  – Anatole France

If you’ve got kids who are planning to play an instrument, you’ll want to pay attention to Budgets are Sexy‘s ideas on saving money on musical instruments.

Free From Broke talks about the hidden costs of home ownership.   A home is a never-ending money sink.

“Peer pressure has many redeeming qualities. It is the pressure of our peers, after all, that gives us the support to try things we otherwise wouldn’t have.” – Bill Treasurer

Suburban Dollar explains Swagbucks.

Money Help for Christians shares some tips to save money.  I particularly enjoyed the coupon walk-through link.

Provident Planning talks about someone living happily on $7000 per year.  I can’t imagine making it on that.

A “Normal” person is the sort of person that might be designed by a committee.  You know, “Each person puts in a pretty color and it comes out gray.”   – Alan Sherman

Final plug:  If you enjoyed yourself, don’t forget to subscribe to Live Real, Now by email or RSS or follow us on Twitter.   All your friends are doing it.   The coolest ones are even fans of LRN on Facebook.

Totally Money Carnival #5, the Superbowl Edition

Misc

Welcome to the Totally Money Carnival #5, the Superbowl Edition.  It’s my privilege to be the first outside host for this carnival.

I don’t watch the Superbowl. I’ve never been into spectator sports unless I have some skin in the game. If I’m playing, or have some money riding on the outcome, I’m watching. Other than that, I’ll usually pass. Yesterday, a bunch of grown men in tights earning envy-inducing amounts of money ran around for a few hours in front of people, some of whom paid 5 figures for the privilege of watching. Yay!

Editor’s Picks

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpjaOUjUPUc

Mike Piper presents Protecting Your Private Files posted at Oblivious Investor, “How can you keep your sensitive documents (scanned tax returns, for instance) both backed up and protected in the event of computer theft?”  Ed.  I love this solution, and I use it.  All of my tax returns, online receipts, and documents I don’t want to lose get treated this way.

Suzanne K. presents The Psychology of Why You Can’t Budget—And Five Tips to Help You Do It posted at PsychologyDegree.net.  Ed.  I’ve always been a fan of trying to understand what makes people tick.

Silicon Valley Blogger presents Prepare Your Tax Return: Tax Products vs Tax Pros posted at The Digerati Life, saying “If you don’t enjoy preparing your taxes, you’re not alone. There are various ways to get your tax returns done. How do you go about preparing your taxes: DIY or with the help of a pro?” Ed.  Tax time sucks.  If we abolished payroll deductions and made everybody in the country write a check to the IRS every year, there would be a revolt on the next April 15th.

Kevin McKee presents How To Know if Your Job is Expendable posted at Thousandaire, saying “When businesses start doing poorly, some people are at risk of losing their job, while others are safe. Find out which category you fall in with these simple questions.”  Ed: I was given a demonstration that defines expendability in the workplace. Fill a glass with water and place it on the counter in front of you. Stick your finger in the glass. Now, pull it out. See the impression you’ve made? I’ve done the rockstar bit, and I’ve been in positions that were necessary for the profitability of larger divisions of large companies. It doesn’t matter. Corporate loyalty is a joke.

Budgeting

35% of people who attend the game write it off as a corporate expense. (source)

Miss T presents 5 Ways to Lower Your Monthly Bills | Prairie EcoThrifter.com posted at Prairie Eco-Thrifter, saying “Believe it or not, there are lots of ways to save money, no matter how much of it you have- or don’t have.”

Credit

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRYLhkOV2so

Tim Chen presents Pentagon Federal Offers Best Gas & Airfare Credit Card Rewards, Period. posted at NerdWallet Blog – Credit Card Watch, saying “There is only one credit card in America that offers no strings attached 5% cash back at any gas stations (excluding the likes of Costco) – the Pentagon Federal Platinum CashBack. It also gets you 2% back at grocery stores.”

Miranda presents Accelerate Your Credit Card Debt Pay Down posted at CreditScore.net, saying “Use these techniques to pay down your credit card debt faster.”

Buck Inspire presents Moving Up and On From Prepaid Debit Cards posted at Buck Inspire.

Ryan Hudson presents How I Got a Credit Card Late Fee Waived posted at Best Credit Cards IQ, saying “Don’t take accidental late fees laying down. Do something about it. Here’s how I got rid of my late fee.”

Debt

No network footage exists of Super Bowl I. It was taped over, supposedly for a soap opera.(source)

John presents Get Out of Debt Fast – How to Speed Up the Process posted at Passive Family Income, saying “There are quite a few people today that are beginning to dig their way out of debt. They have monitored their spending, created a budget, and have done the best that they can to stick with it. But, as many of you have experienced, the excitement of becoming debt-free gets pretty old after a while.”

Finance

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRDx18GYITw

Mike Collins presents Defined Benefit vs Defined Contribution posted at Saving Money Today, saying “Understanding the different types of retirement plans.”

Boomer presents 10 Ways For Women To Obtain Financial Empowerment posted at Boomer & Echo, “It’s not that difficult to get your financial life under control (your control). Remember, a man is not a financial plan.”

Frugality

The Super Bowl is measured in Roman numerals because a football season runs the span over two calendar years. This year the season began in 2010 and ends in 2011. (source)

Madison DuPaix presents Substitute, Improvise, and Make Do With What You Have posted at My Dollar Plan, saying “So often, when we run out of things we need, we run to buy something or spend money when we don’t have to. Find out how you can avoid this trap.”

Money Beagle presents The Power Of The Free Calendar posted at Money Beagle.

Amanda L Grossman presents Homemade Diversion Safes: Save Money by Making Your Own posted at Frugal Confessions – Frugal Living, saying “You can purchase your own home security money safes (diversion safes), but I thought it would be more frugal and fun to think of ones to make on your own. See what I can do with a used deodorant!”

Money Management

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQkK1UCH1EU

MoneyNing presents What Would You Do with a Million Dollars? posted at Money Ning, saying “I know what I would do with a million dollars. How about you?”

Other

More drivers are involved in alcohol-related accidents on Super Bowl Sunday than any other day of the year (except St. Patrick’s Day), according to the Insurance Information Institute. (source)

Joe Morgan presents Is Gen Y Irresponsible, Or Is It A Matter Of Perspective? posted at Simple Debt-Free Finance, saying “Generation Y has a reputation for having a sense of entitlement, but here’s one reason it may just be a matter or perspective.”

Saving

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_78ylMLa0JQ

Ryan @ MFN presents Roth IRA Qualifications posted at The Military Wallet, saying “Are you qualified to open a Roth IRA? Find out income and contribution requirements to see if you are eligible!”

Brian @ BeBetterNow presents Money’s Golden Rule: Spend Less Than You Earn posted at Be Better Now, “In the end, most personal finance advice boils down to spending less than you earn. Here’s another article to reinforce that.”

Spending

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g364TG_8Qmw

Barb Friedberg presents Wealth in Life: 25 Cheap Ideas for Fun posted at Barbara Friedberg Personal Finance, “Join in to build a massive list of low cost fun!”

Taxes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R55e-uHQna0

PT presents Tax on Unemployment Compensation posted at PT Money, saying “A detailed look at what taxes are due on your unemployment compensation.”

Ken presents Important Tax Update for 2010 You Don’t Want To Miss posted at Spruce Up Your Finances, saying “A few of the tax provisions applicable to tax year 2010 such as the extension of tax filing date, expanded tax benefits, phase out on some limitations, etc.”

Fanny presents Top 10 Tax Deductions for Parents posted at Living Richly on a Budget, “Being a parent is one of the most important roles in life. Why not take advantage of all the deductions you qualify for?”

Thank you all for participating!  Next week’s host is Saving Money Today, so be sure to submit your posts.

Enhanced by Zemanta