- Uop past midnight. 3am feeding. 5am hurts. Back to bed? #
- Stayed up this morning and watched Terminator:Salvation. AWAKs make for bad plot advancement. #
- Last night, Inglorious Basterds was not what I was expecting. #
- @jeffrosecfp It's a fun time, huh. These few months are payment for the fun months coming, when babies become interactive. 🙂 in reply to jeffrosecfp #
- RT @BSimple: RT @bugeyedguide: When we cling to past experiences we keep giving them energy…and we do not have much energy to spare #
- RT @LivingFrugal: Jan 18, Pizza Soup (GOOOOOD Stuff) http://bit.ly/5rOTuc #budget #money #
- Free Turbotax for low income or active-duty military. http://su.pr/29y30d #
- To most ppl,you're just somebody [from casting] to play the bit part of "Other Office Worker" in the movie of their life http://su.pr/1DYMQZ #
- RT @MoneyCrashers: Money Crashers 2010 New Year Giveaway Bash – $8,300 in Cash and Amazing Prizes http://bt.io/DQHw #
- RT: @flexo: RT @wisebread: Tylenol, Motrin, Rolaids, and Benadryl RECALLED! Check your cabinets: http://bit.ly/4BVJfJ #
- New goal for Feb. 100 pushups in 1 set. Anyone care to join me? #
- RT @BSimple: Your future is created by what you do today, not tomorrow"— Robert Kiyosaki So take action now. #
- RT @hughdeburgh: "Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now." ~ Sophia Loren #
- Chances of finding winter boots at a thrift store in January? Why do they wear our at the worst time? #
- @LenPenzo Anyone who make something completely idiot proof underestimates the ingenuity of complete idiots. in reply to LenPenzo #
- RT @zappos: "Lots of people want to ride w/ you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus w/ you…" -Oprah Winfrey #
- RT @chrisguillebeau: "The cobra will bite you whether you call it cobra or Mr. Cobra" -Indian Proverb (via @boxofcrayons) #
- RT @SuburbanDollar: I keep track of all my blogging income and expenses using http://outright.com it is free&helps with taxes #savvyblogging #
- Reading: Your Most Frequently Asked Running Questions – Answered http://bit.ly/8panmw via @zen_habits #
The Evils of a Reverse Mortgage
Picture it: Sicily, 1922.
Sorry, wrong channel. Let’s try again.
Picture it: 20, 30, 50 years from now. You’re old. The money you’ve been failing to save so you could stock up on Fritos and obsolete video game consoles(to survive the zombie apocalypse in style) would come in handy about now, since the end of the world never happened. Note to self: Never trust an ancient Mayan.
You’re 70, with no savings and no income aside from the Social Security check that hasn’t been adjusted for inflation since the Palin(Bristol) administration.
But you own your house and that nice young man down at Yersk Rude Bank recommended a reverse mortgage. That could give you all of the money you need to live a comfortable retirement and pay for a bit of a funeral.
Right?
Nazzofast.
Of all of the possible social security strategies, this is one of the worst.
What is a reverse mortgage?
In a traditional mortgage, you’re given a chunk of money guaranteed by your home. You have to pay that money back over time, or you’ll lose your house. In a reverse mortgage, you’re still converting your home’s equity into cash, but you don’t have to pay it back until you die or move, including moving into a nursing home. You are effectively abandoning future-house in exchange for now-money.
Who qualifies for a reverse mortgage?
If you are 62 or older, and live in a home you own, you qualify. Credit and income are not considered.
Why would you want a reverse mortgage?
If money is tight and you have no prospects, a reverse mortgage may be a valid consideration. A better consideration would be to take out a traditional loan and make monthly payments out of that lump sum, or sell your house outright and move someplace more affordable.
What are the downsides of a reverse mortgage?
You lose your house. Technically, your heirs lose your house. A reverse mortgage becomes due when you die. If your heirs can’t cover the loan, the house will be foreclosed. Also, this is a loan. It accumulates interest, even if you aren’t paying it back. If you borrow $200,000 and die in 10 years, your estate may owe $400,000 on the reverse mortgage. If this is a treasured family home, losing it could come as a shocking blow at a time when your family would already be reeling from the loss of, well, you.
What if you really don’t like your heirs?
I’d still recommend getting a traditional mortgage. You can throw a killer party and then, you’ll rebuild equity over time. That way, if you live longer than you expect, you can refinance and throw another killer party. If you go this route, don’t invite the kids, but be sure to hire a videographer so they can see how you’re spending their inheritance.
I’m not a banker or a financial advisor, but I’d recommend against a reverse mortgage in almost all circumstances.
How about you? Would you get one, or recommend one? What’s your preferred method to hurt your ungrateful heirs?
Unlicensed Health “Insurance”
Health insurance is–without a doubt–expensive.
As much as I hate the idea of socialized health care, it does have one shiny selling point to counter its absolute immorality: it’s cheap. Assuming, of course, you ignore the higher taxes and skewed supply/demand balance.
Here in the US, we’re free from that burdensome contrivance. Instead, we have health care and health insurance industries that are heavily regulated and ultimately run by people who have A) never held a job outside of government or academia, and B) have no idea how to run either a hospital or a business. That works so much better. Some days, I think our health system would be better run by giving syringes and band-aids to drunken monkeys. The high-level decision making wouldn’t be worse.
Thanks to that mess and the high unemployment rate that somehow hasn’t been remedied by the 27 bazillion imaginary jobs that have been save or created in the last 2 years, some people are hurting. Not the poor. We have so many “safety net” programs that the poor are covered. I’m talking about the “too rich to be considered poor, but too poor to be comfortable”, the middle class.
If are much above the poverty line, you will stop qualifying for some of the affordable programs. The higher above the line you go, the less you qualify for. That makes sense, but the fact that we have so many safety net programs means there is a lot of demand created by all of the people who are getting their health care “free”.
That drives the prices up for the people who actually have to pay for their own care. Yes, even if you have an employer-sponsored plan, you are paying for the health insurance. That insurance is a benefit that is a part of your total compensation. If employers weren’t paying that, they could afford higher wages.
As the price goes up, employers are moving to a high-deductible plans, which puts a squeeze on the employees’ budgets. Employees–you and I, the people who actually have to pay these bills–are looking for ways to save money on the care, so they can actually afford to see a doctor.
In response to that squeeze, some unscrupulous people(#$%#@%! scammers) are capitalizing on the financial pain and selling “health discount plans” which promise extensive discounts for a cheap membership fee. These plans are not insurance. In a best-case scenario, the discount plans will get you a small discount from a tiny network of doctors and clinics. Prescription drug plans are no better. You may get a 60% discount, but only if you use a back-alley pharmacy in Nome, Alaska between the hours of 8 AM and 8:15 AM on January 32nd of odd leap years.
How can you tell it’s a scam?
The scammers will try to sell you on false scarcity. They’ll say the plan is filling up fast and you have to buy now if you want to get in on it. For all major purchases, if you aren’t going to be allowed time to research your options, assume it’s a scam. Good deals won’t evaporate.
They aren’t licensed. Call the Department of Commerce for your state and see if the company is a licensed insurance provider. Pro tip: they aren’t.
They don’t want you to read the plan until after you’ve paid. That’s a flashing, screaming, electro-shock warning sign for anything. Once you’ve given them your money, your options are reduced.
The price is amazingly low. Of course it is. They aren’t actually providing any services, so their overhead is nonexistent. They only have to pay for gas to get to the bank to cash your checks.
Really, the best way to judge if something is a scam is to go with your gut. Does it feel like a scam? Do you feel like you’re getting away with something? Does it sound too good to be true?
To recap: health care/prescription discount plans = bad juju.
Cthulhu’s Guide to Finance
This is a guest post from Cthulhu, written in his house at R’lyeh. In the eons of his imprisonment, he has never contributed a blog post…until now. Be nice, this is his first post ever.
Cthulhu fhtagn. Cthulhu waits. Eons in R’lyeh–dead but dreaming–have taught me well the virtue of patience. Rush not into the abyss of hasty decisions.Lie patiently until the stars align and you can once again dominate your investments. As much as I despise virtues, patience is the one I practice.
Just as looking upon my form may cost you your sanity, obsessing over your finances may cost your loved ones the same. Instead, set your finances on a path of prosperity and work to hasten my return. Spend less than you earn. Earn more than you need. Give the rest to me.
Use the Shoggoth. Thought the postules of greenish light light may disgust those who have never devoured an entire planet, they are good for menial work. Use them, or their demented cousin, the automatic payment, to pay your bills. Set them to the task of making sure all of your bills are paid on time, leaving you free for more productive works. Do not, however, make the mistake of Ubbo-Sathla, whose fecundity spawned the vermin prototype known as homo sapiens. Keep your Shoggoth under control so they do not spend what you have not yet earned.
Avoid the Deep Ones. When dealing with the paramount evil(though I shouldn’t say that as a bad thing) of lenders, beware my servants. If they catch you in over your head, you will be screwed. If you cannot pay the price, there will be fees and punishments galore. A proper Cthulhu-fest of Chaos and Mayhem at your expense! A pound of flesh for every dollar not paid will be the standard when I arise, but for now, it is $39 for missing a payment or spending more than your limit.
“The only saving grace of the present is that it’s too damned stupid to question the past very closely.” This quote by my favorite historian demonstrates the futility of your mortal existence. If you learn from your mistakes, or–less painfully–the mistakes of others, you will grow as a person. Personal growth is entirely at odds with my goals as the Greater Evil. Learning from your mistakes will prevent you from making the same mistakes in the future. Einstein once said “doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results” is the definition of insanity. That, or looking upon my form. One of those acts can be avoided. It is in your best interests to avoid insanity, at least until I awaken.
So many of those inhabiting my Earthly domain seem to suffer from my get Ghatanothoa‘s curse–absolute petrification in the face of their travails. When faced with a foe, fight! Do not collapse under the burden of your debts! Work! An inch, a dollar, a pound at a time: Defeat it! Do not quit and do not give up. Cthulhu does not forget or forgive.
That is the wisdom brought forth from my dead-but-dreaming slumber in R’yleh. Read it, understand it, follow it. It will serve you well until my return.
This post has been resurrected because I want to see it on the front page again.
Ditch Cable and Still Enjoy TV
Cable is expensive. If you have more than just basic cable, you are probably paying at least $65 per month or more, just for TV. How can you save on television, without stealing cable?
The good news is that, in the internet age, it is possible to fully enjoy TV without having to pay exorbitant fees to the cable company.
Basic Cable
Basic cable generally runs about $15 per month, but it usually comes with a $10 per month discount on internet access if you use cable for that. For $5 per month, you can get all of the local broadcast channels, including the news and weather, which we use in the morning while getting ready for work.
Netflix
We watch movies. We watch lots of movies. Spending $14 per month for an unlimited 2-at-a-time plan is a no-brainer for us. It has also enabled us to scratch the movie itch without resorting to HBO or incessant movie purchases, which used to run $100+ each month. When you include Netflix instant in the equation, which gives us a ton of older movies to choose from at a moment’s notice, we are more than covered for our movie obsession.
Hulu
Hulu.com has a metric crapload of TV shows and movies available for free. They are moving towards a partial pay model, but most of their content will still be free. But, you don’t want to crowd your family around a 15-inch laptop screen to watch something, you say? Fine. We went to our local computer parts store and bought cables and converters to go from the video-out and headphone jacks on the laptop to the inputs on our VCR. That cost about $30 for 2 extension cords and 2 converters. We use the analog outputs, which allows for cheaper converters. The quality after conversion is no worse than watching a movie in the VCR.
TiVo
TiVo comes with a Video-On-Demand(VOD) section, if you connect it to the internet. It’s mostly free, with hundreds of channels to choose from, ranging from trailers to full shows and movies. I have a season pass to TEDTalks, which are always impressive and usually inspirational. There are many more channels to choose from.
Torrent
I’m kidding. I’m not advocate piracy. This is just search-engine bait.
As you can see, it’s entirely possible to save money on cable, without missing out on anything you care about. How do you save money on TV and movies?
Funeral Costs: How to Keep it Inexpensive, Without Being Cheap
The average funeral costs $6500. Many people die with absolutely no savings. Even if there is life insurance, it takes weeks to get the money, while a funeral is completed within a week.
Funeral homes have an easy sales pitch. Nobody wants to sully the memory of their loved ones. The tiniest hint of a guilt trip will have most families upgrading to the silk pillow in a second. Here’s a secret: Your loved one doesn’t care. I’m not recommending using garbage bags and a dumpster. By all means, treat your loved ones with care, but don’t go overboard.
Not everyone is comfortable with cremation, and some religions don’t permit it, but it is probably the least expensive way to process a body. It costs approximately $1400 to cremate a body and you can get very attractive urns for under $100. Compare that to a $3500 casket and storage & transportation fees, and–from a strictly monetary standpoint–the choice is clear.
Don’t worry too much about decorating. Flowers aren’t cheap and florists don’t tend to offer discounts to people who aren’t emotionally prepared to negotiate and who are in a time crunch to find the flowers they need. Get a few bouquets for a small display around the casket or urn, and let the rest take care of itself. Many of the guests will bring flowers, so the entrance will soon be decorated for free, and that’s the part that makes the first impression.