- Uop past midnight. 3am feeding. 5am hurts. Back to bed? #
- Stayed up this morning and watched Terminator:Salvation. AWAKs make for bad plot advancement. #
- Last night, Inglorious Basterds was not what I was expecting. #
- @jeffrosecfp It's a fun time, huh. These few months are payment for the fun months coming, when babies become interactive. 🙂 in reply to jeffrosecfp #
- RT @BSimple: RT @bugeyedguide: When we cling to past experiences we keep giving them energy…and we do not have much energy to spare #
- RT @LivingFrugal: Jan 18, Pizza Soup (GOOOOOD Stuff) http://bit.ly/5rOTuc #budget #money #
- Free Turbotax for low income or active-duty military. http://su.pr/29y30d #
- To most ppl,you're just somebody [from casting] to play the bit part of "Other Office Worker" in the movie of their life http://su.pr/1DYMQZ #
- RT @MoneyCrashers: Money Crashers 2010 New Year Giveaway Bash – $8,300 in Cash and Amazing Prizes http://bt.io/DQHw #
- RT: @flexo: RT @wisebread: Tylenol, Motrin, Rolaids, and Benadryl RECALLED! Check your cabinets: http://bit.ly/4BVJfJ #
- New goal for Feb. 100 pushups in 1 set. Anyone care to join me? #
- RT @BSimple: Your future is created by what you do today, not tomorrow"— Robert Kiyosaki So take action now. #
- RT @hughdeburgh: "Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now." ~ Sophia Loren #
- Chances of finding winter boots at a thrift store in January? Why do they wear our at the worst time? #
- @LenPenzo Anyone who make something completely idiot proof underestimates the ingenuity of complete idiots. in reply to LenPenzo #
- RT @zappos: "Lots of people want to ride w/ you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus w/ you…" -Oprah Winfrey #
- RT @chrisguillebeau: "The cobra will bite you whether you call it cobra or Mr. Cobra" -Indian Proverb (via @boxofcrayons) #
- RT @SuburbanDollar: I keep track of all my blogging income and expenses using http://outright.com it is free&helps with taxes #savvyblogging #
- Reading: Your Most Frequently Asked Running Questions – Answered http://bit.ly/8panmw via @zen_habits #
Inadvertent BOGO
I refuse to buy my kid more expensive video game systems. He’s got a friend who’s got one of each, going back 15 years.
We don’t do that, so he’s spent the last 6 months saving to buy his own XBox 360. After his birthday this month, he finally had enough, so we ordered it a few days ago.
Wednesday was the Great Unboxing.
I was making dinner in the kitchen while the punk and his friend unpacked the box from Amazon.
The squeals were normal. The shouts of “Dad, why did you buy two XBoxes?” were a surprise.
Two?
No.
Actually, yes. There were two of the things in the box. Did I order two? Did I accidentally pay for two?
Nope. The packing slip only listed one, my order history only showed one, and my credit card was only charged for one.
Yet, there were two in the box. Free XBox! Woot!
That means an XBox in the bedroom for Grand Theft Auto and Red Dead Redemption, and an XBox in the basement for Madden and Star Wars. No fighting. No turns to take. And it didn’t cost us an extra $200.
That’s all win.
If there’s nothing on the packing slip, then Amazon didn’t know I had it. Even if they did, I didn’t do anything to make them send it. There was no fraud. Legally, I had no obligation of any kind to do anything other than enjoy my new prize.
Lots of win.
The kids were excited. Everyone gets a turn. Multiplayer games.
The parents were excited. We get a turn. M-rated games.
So much freaking win in that box.
But….
There’s always a but.
We didn’t order it. We didn’t pay for it. It wasn’t ours.
A friend told me to sell it. She knows how hard we’re working to pay off debt.
A coworker said, “Screw them. They’re just a big corporation who’d be happy to screw you first.”
But it wasn’t ours.
I spent 12 hours trying to rationalize a way to keep it that wouldn’t be unethical, make me feel guilty, or–most important–send a horrible message to my kids.
I couldn’t do it.
It wasn’t ours.
I had a talk with my son. It was his money that got this little prize into our house, after all. He wanted to keep it, naturally. He’s got a lot to learn about persuasion. He acknowledged that sending it back was the right thing to do. He agreed that it would suck if the roles were reversed. His only argument in favor of keeping it was “I want it.”
Even he admitted that was completely lame.
It’s going back. I let him think that was his decision.
I talked to Amazon. They apologized for the inconvenience and gave me a UPS label to send it back at no cost. It didn’t cover pickup, but I’ve got a drop box in my office building, so I can deal with that.
My wife was pissed. The customer service rep never bothered to say thank you. She called Amazon to complain to a manager. After reminding him that we had no duty to return the free XBox, he gave us a $25 gift card to say thank you.
I love my wife.
My son, for deciding to to the right thing, gets to spend the gift card. My wife, for being awesome, gets to be with me. I miss my free XBox.
What would you do? Would you keep the free XBox, sell it, or send it back?
Human Interaction
Life may be like a box of chocolates, but it is certainly not a game of Sorry, where one person wins at the expense of all others. It is entirely possible for everyone to win in most voluntary interactions.
For example, if my company gives me a $10,000 raise, it would seem like I win and they lose. I’m getting more money, at the expense of their bottom line, right? Maybe. But what if that raise spurs me on to make an extra $100,000 for the company? That makes it a good investment and a Win/Win scenario.
When I’m dealing with one of my side-business customers or an advertiser, I’m definitely pushing for the Win/Win. Of course I want them to pay me as much as possible, but I also want their repeat business, which won’t happen unless they walk away happy. If I insisted that each of my customers pay the absolute top dollar, I may come out ahead in the short-term, but what about next month or next year? It’s much better for both of us if we can find a happy middle ground.
The four basic forms of interaction are:
1. Win/Lose. This is where I win and you lose. Haha! The problem with a Win/Lose is that the loser isn’t going to come back to play next year. He’s not happy and he’ll probably tell his friends how unhappy he is. This is also the interaction that people are mistakenly assuming when they complain about excessive executive interaction. The CEO is making a million dollars while the folks on the assembly line are stuck with $15 per hour? It’s entirely possible that, if the CEO weren’t doing his job, nobody else would have one. That is, like it or not, Win/Win.
2. Lose/Win. This is where I give up everything, hoping you’ll eventually throw me a bone. It’s a cowardly interaction that won’t work well when dealing with someone playing #1. I’ll keep giving, you’ll keep taking. You go home happy, I go home sore. When it’s done, I won’t do business with you ever again.
3. Lose/Lose. Nobody wins. We fight so hard to get what we want, forcing the other side to give up as much as possible, while they are doing the same. At the end of the day, the hatred is flowing so strong, there’s no possibility of a relationship.
4. Win/Win. Yay! Everybody wins! Everybody’s happy! This will involve some compromise, but hopefully we can reach the happy middle ground where we are both smiling. If I’m looking for a deal that involves you paying me $1000 per month, is it better for me to push to get exactly that, or let myself get talked down to $750? If the $1000 is more than you can afford, so you quit with hard feelings after one month, the ongoing $750 is much, much better for both of us. It is actually in my greedy self-interest to give up that 25% to build our relationship.
Winning doesn’t have to be done at the expense of others. If you do it right, we all win.
Money Problems – Day 3: What’s Coming In?
Today, I continuing the series, Money Problems: 30 Days to Perfect Finances. The series will consist of 30 things you can do in one setting to perfect your finances. It’s not a system to magically make your debt disappear. Instead, it is a path to understanding where you are, where you want to be, and–most importantly–how to bridge the gap.
I’m not running the series in 30 consecutive days. That’s not my schedule. Also, I think that talking about the same thing for 30 days straight will bore both of us. Instead, it will run roughly once a week. To make sure you don’t miss a post, please take a moment to subscribe, either by email or rss.
This is day 3 and today, you are going to take a look at your income.
We are only interested your take-home pay, because that is what you have to base a budget on. If you base your budget on your gross pay, you’re going to be in trouble when you try to spend the roughly 35% of your check that gets taken for taxes and benefits.
Income is a pretty straight-forward topic. It is—simply—how much money you make in a month. If you are like most people, the easiest way to tell how much money you make is to look at your last paycheck. Then, multiply it by the number of pay periods in a year and divide the total by 12.
Here’s the formula: Cash x Yearly Pay Periods / 12. Yay, math!
If you get paid every 2 weeks, multiply your take-home pay by 26, then divide by 12 to figure your monthly pay. For example, if you make $1000 every two weeks, your annual take-home pay is $26,000. Divide that by 12 to get your monthly pay of $2166.66. If you get paid semi-monthly, you’ll take that same $1000 x 24 / 12, for a total of $2000 per month.
Now you know how much you make each month. Woo!
Is it enough? Who knows? We’ll get into that later. In the meantime, spend some time thinking about ways you can make more money. Do you have a talent or a hobby that you can turn into cash?
- If you’re a craftsy type, make stuff and sell it on eBay or Etsy.
- If you’re a writer, start a blog, sell articles on oDesk, or start writing for paid article directories. Squidoo has a revenue sharing plan for your articles.
- Facebook maven? Start making Pages for companies. They will pay for it.
- Are you mechanically inclined? Watch your local free market sites for lawn mowers and snowblowers that don’t run. You can fix them up and sell them.
- If you’re a clean freak, start a home-cleaning service on evenings and weekends.
There are always ways to make some extra money, if you are willing. Sit down with a friend or loved one and brainstorm what you can do. Write down anything you can do, you enjoy, or you are good at. Remember, there are no stupid ideas when you are brainstorming. The bad ideas will get filtered out later.
How could you make some (more) side cash?
Christmas for the Destitute
First, my disclaimer: I’m not destitute.
However, I’m trying to spend Christmas acting like I am a pauper.
Why, with small children and beautiful-and-more-than-deserving wife, would I want to deprive my family of a bountiful holiday?
Before we get into the reasons for being a horrible grinch bent on depriving my children of their god-given right to rampant consumerism, let’s look at the Philosophy of Destitution.
The primary reason to pull back and tone it down is basic frugality. Excessive anything is not frugal. I am training my children–and for that matter, my wife and my self–in the finer arts of personal responsibility and frugality. Accumulating debt for a fleeting holiday is insane. If we can’t afford to buy it, we certainly can’t afford to give it. Anything else would be setting a bad example and children learn best by example.
Another piece of the Philosophy of Destitution(when I read this word, I hear a deep, booming voice in my head, like a 30s radio superhero voiceover) is “green”. I consider myself a conservationalist rather than an environmentalist, so don’t read too much into that color. I try to be responsible, instead of destructive and I try to avoid being wasteful. Toys that won’t be played with are wasteful. A garbage can full of packaging for those same toys costs money. It is much cheaper to avoid the landfill here.
Back to “Why”. Why would I be willing to deprive my family?
Invisible Cushion
Earlier this year, we experimented with abandoning the strict budget in favor of automating as much as possible on our credit card, and keeping our discretionary spending under control, but on the same card.
We failed. It was 2 parts lack of communication, 3 parts lack of discipline, and 1 part “we’re dumb”. Transitioning back to cash hasn’t been that smooth. The problem is that we went over budget for a couple of months and our renewed budget had to shrink to cover the credit card.
To recap: Coming off a few months going over budget, we had to tighten our belts even more than we had before…after breaking our good habits.
It didn’t work out well.
If one of us forgot to grab cash, we’d just charge whatever we were buying, which gave the month’s budget a spanking, every time.
Last month, I added a new category to our budget. It’s just a cushion. I’ve got $200 whose sole purpose is to make sure we don’t go over budget.
But there’s a secret.
The cushion is a secret.
I’m not a fan of hiding money from my wife, but I’m hiding this. Generally, I think that money and relationships and secrets don’t mix.
However…
She’s told me that, when she knows there’s extra money, she has an urge to spend it. If I told her there was an extra $200, she would spend it. If I tell her that we have $40o to cover our discretionary spending, and she goes over by $50, we’re still $150 to the good, which leaves me room to have lapses in discipline or memory, too.
Then, at the end of the month, any of the invisible cushion that is left over can get applied to our debt payments.
This system should let us keep rolling, with less stress and fewer arguments, while still helping us get rid of our remaining debts. The biggest flaw is the secret. I’m bad at keeping secrets from my wife, especially about things that affect both of us, but if i let it slip, the invisible cushion will go away.
What do you think? Am I a jerk for hiding part of our budget? Do you hide anything about your finances?
