- Happy Independence Day! Be thankful for what you've been given by those who have gone before! #
- Waiting for fireworks with the brats. Excitement is high. #
- @PhilVillarreal Amazing. I'm really Cringer. That makes me feel creepy. in reply to PhilVillarreal #
- Built a public life-maintenance calendar in GCal. https://liverealnow.net/y7ph #
- @ericabiz makes webinars fun! Even if her house didn't collapse in the middle of it. #
- BOFH + idiot = bad combination #
5 Ways to Change the World for the Better
We are all stuck on the same planet with each other. There is nothing any of us are going to do to get the option of leaving for long. Do you want to live in a miserable, run-down world, or one that’s happy and filled with kittens and ice cream?
The kind of world you live in is more a function of your state of mind than the place you live, the job you have, or the person you married. Here are a few ways to improve that state of mind.
1. Be kind. Smile at a teller. Let someone merge in front of you in traffic. Drop a dollar in a homeless man’s jar. Have you ever had a lousy day make a total turnaround because of some inconsequential bit of yay? Doing some small act of kindness can make a world of difference in someone’s day. Next time you’re in the drive-through at Caribou, buy coffee for the person behind you. That random bit of love will put a smile on both your faces.
2. Be positive. Don’t complain. So many of us live in a negative world, watching the world go buy through coffin-colored glasses. Have you ever considered going an entire day without making a negative comment? A week? A month? Some of you are shaking your heads right now, thinking it’s impossible. Have you thought about how much happier you would be if you banned the negative crap in your life?
3. Be a good neighbor. We’ve all had the same problems: a neighbor that plays music too loud, too late; the jerk across the street who yells at you for park on the street in front of his house; the guy who’s too busy to mow his lawn; or the crazy cat lady who makes the entire neighborhood smell like a litter box. Don’t be that guy. I’ve had 90% of my neighbors for more than 5 years. If we don’t make accommodations for the people we have to deal with every day, we’re going to be miserable.
4. Learn something new. If you feel good about yourself, you feel better about the world. If you feel better about the world, you’re more likely to do things to improve it. One of the best ways to feel good about yourself is to improve yourself. Take a class, read a book, or find a mentor to teach you. The method doesn’t matter, just do something to learn something you’re interested in.
What are you doing to make your world better?
Corporate Bankruptcy Hurts Employee’s Most
This is a guest post from Hunter Montgomery. He writes for Financially Consumed on every-day personal finance issues. He is married to a Navy meteorologist, proud father of 3, a mad cyclist, and recently graduated with a Master’s degree in Family Financial Planning. Read his blog at financiallyconsumed.com.
Bankruptcy has evolved from something that people and businesses were deeply ashamed of a few decades ago, to a seemingly acceptable path to restructuring; towards a more sustainable future. Bankruptcy is so common in corporate America that it is referred to by some as an acceptable and necessary business tool.
This bothers me on a number of levels, but mainly because corporate bankruptcies hurt the humble employee the most. The laws are supposedly designed to help the company stay in business, and continue to provide jobs. But at what cost to those employees?
When a company declares bankruptcy, they are essentially admitting to the world that they failed to compete. Their business model was flawed, they were poorly managed, and they simply did not organize their resources appropriately to meet their consumer needs.
Given this failure, it shocks me, that bankruptcy laws are designed to allow management to get together with their bankers. They essentially protect each other. Management is obsessed with holding on to power. The bankers are obsessed with avoiding a loss.
The bankruptcy produces a document called first-day-orders. This is a blueprint for guiding the organization towards future prosperity. But this is essentially drafted by the existing company management, and their bankers. Do you see any conflict of interest emerging here?
Bankers are given super-priority claims to the money they have loaned the company. Even before employee pension fund obligations. This is absurd. Surely if they loaned money to an enterprise that failed, they deserve to lose their money.
Management generally rewards itself with large bonuses, after declaring failure, paying off their bankers, shafting the employees, and finally re-emerging with a vastly smaller company. This is ridiculous.
The humble employee pays the highest price. Assuming there is even a job to return to after restructuring they have likely given up pay, working conditions, healthcare benefits, and pension benefits.
This is exactly what happened at United Airlines in 2002 after they filed for chapter 11 bankruptcy protections. The CEO received bonuses, and was entitled to the full retirement package. The banker’s enjoyed super-priority claims over company assets to cover their loans. Meanwhile, the employees lost wages, working conditions, healthcare benefits, and a 30% reduction in pension benefits.
An adjustment like this would force a serious re-evaluation of retirement plans. For most people, it would require additional years in the workforce before retirement could even be considered a real possibility.
Employees of General Motors, which recently went through bankruptcy proceedings, also had to give up significant healthcare benefits, and life insurance benefits. Entering bankruptcy, it was the objective to reduce retiree obligations by two-thirds. That’s a massive cut.
The warning to all of us here is that we must do everything possible not to fall victim to corporate restructuring. Save all you can, outside of your expected pension plan, because you never know when poor management, or a terrible economy, will force your employer to file bankruptcy. Always plan for the worst possible outcome.
It’s a competitive world and it’s quite possible that the traditional American system of benefits is uncompetitive, and unsustainable in the global market place. The tragedy of adjusting to a more sustainable system is that the employee suffers the most.
Friends and Acquaintances
“Friends help you move. Good friends help you move bodies.”
-unknown
Some people have dozens of friends. I’m not that guy.
I have 6.
Everybody in the world can be divided into 4 categories.
- Strangers. A xenophobe’s nightmare. These are the people you don’t know, whether they are passing you on the sidewalk, or newborns on the opposite side of the world.
- Acquaintances. These are the people you’ve met, mostly in passing. They tend not to have much effect on your life. You may pass a friendly bus ride in conversation, but it’s nothing that sticks. A waitress, the clerk at the store, a friend’s latest date; these are the people you interact with for just a moment and rarely think about further.
- Friendlies. Most people call these folks friends. I don’t. I’m friendly with them, hence the name, but it’s not true friendship. Often, they are either my wife’s friends, or my friends’ wives. Sometimes, they are a friend of a friend that I only see at parties, or a coworker that I get along with, but never see outside of work. We’re friendly, but not obliged. I may help with some things, but it’s not necessarily a priority. I’ll go to a funeral, but probably won’t help plan it.
- Friends. To me, calling someone a friend is a big deal. I’m willing to do a lot for my friends. They are able to command large amounts of my time, and ask any number of favors. If needed, I’ll open my home or help demolish their’s. Loyalty, honesty, trust, respect, and companionship are all a part of my definition of a friend. If a friend needs help, I’ll come running. In return, I expect the same.
Family tends to fall into the same analogous categories.
It sounds cold, but I hesitate to let people graduate into the final category. My wife used to try to “set me up” with people that she thought I’d like to be friends with, thinking I was sad to have so few friends. It took years for her to realize that I was happy. It’s a matter of quality over quantity. Most of the friends I have, I’ve had for 10 years or more. I’ve known each of them for at least 5 years, not that time is a requirement.
Moving people into the “friends” category is a lot like dating. You get along, so you invite the potential friends out for a drink, one on one. You feel them out to see if they are compatible. You meet their families, share some food, build some history. If it all works out, eventually, you consider them a true friend, even if you couldn’t mark the date of the transition.
You wouldn’t marry everyone you date, so why would turn everyone you basically get along with into a friend?
Do you have a lot of friends? What marks friendship for you?
Playing For Blood
Kris at Every Tips and Thoughts wrote a post about games and letting her kids win feeling bad about winning. I disagree. This post is an expansion of my comment there.
When we play games in my house, we play for blood. I’ve never let my kids win and they know it. From the first time the kids attempt Memory, they know they’ve got to earn a win against Mom and Dad. They know if they lose, they must do so gracefully. If they pout or cry, they lose game privileges for a while. I demand good sportsmanship, win or lose.
To be clear, my kids are 3, 4, and 11 and they are all held to the same standards of sportsmanship. Win or lose, they will do so gracefully. There will be no temper tantrums when they are Sorry’d and no pouting when the Queen is captured.
It took my son almost 3 years to beat me at chess. When it finally happened, he was almost as proud as I was and still talks about it 5 years later.
It’s not much fun playing games with his friends. They were coddled and expect to win everything. I have to take away game privileges just like I do for my 3 year old. They hate that because we have the coolest board games. Nobody else has games that involve zombies or disembodied brains.
What has the result been?
My kids love playing games. This week, my oldest has been teaching his sisters how to play Life. When he visits his friends, he’s as likely to bring a board game as an electronic game. He’s got a good mind for strategy, and I can’t remember the last time he pouted when I tromped him.
My 4 year old hasn’t mastered gamesmanship yet, but she will. When I threaten to put the game away, she wipes her eyes, and keeps playing, even if her jaw is chattering. She knows what is expected and works to live up to it.
Both of the older kids are competitive. They’ve never had a win handed to them, and they have each had wins they had to work for, and they know how it feels to win and earn it.
The youngest doesn’t care if she wins, she’s just happy to play. In my experience, the competitive gameplay gene doesn’t activate until 4.
In my mind, the real world won’t hand them any wins, so I might as well start teaching them how to work for it now.
How about you? Do you let your kids win, or do you teach them that all games are bloodsports?
The Things That Bring You Here
I’ve been walking though my analytics data. That is the Big Brother software I use to know everything about each one of my dear readers. It’s all part of my master plan to rule the world. Muwahaha!
Some of the results are interesting.
The single most-used search term to find this site is “slow carb diet“, which is great, because I really enjoyed writing that post. I’ve been slacking on the diet lately, but I’m still down more than 30 pounds. I’m currently ranked #3 in Google for this term. If I move up 2 more spots, I’ll outrank Tim Ferriss for his own product. If I aggregated all of the “slow carb” variations, this post probably accounts for more than half of my traffic from Google.
Many of you come here by searching for “how to have a perfect life“. I’ll do everything I can to help you achieve that, but it’s going to take work on your part. There are no shortcuts.
“Beat the Check” is another popular search term, but a very bad game to play. It’s almost impossible to win it, since the Check 21 Act of 2004.
It’s interesting that “trained husband” brings a few of you each month. My question: are you shopping, or exploring a new fetish? Don’t be shy.
I’m a bit amazed that “zombie wheels” is something people actually search for, but 140 people hit Google looking for that term every month, and a few of them make it over here.
“How to stretch a meal“, “things you should buy online“, and “unsecured loan advice” are some of the top personal finance terms bringing you all in, though “how to make a bunker” and its variation are popular, too.
“Hoe can you force your wife” is a bit disturbing. Most of the results are naturally for sex. I can’t help but hope that I’ve either really disappointed this visitor, or convinced him that force is a bad idea.
“How much did a pound of gold weigh in 1854?” is a search that makes me giggle. To the best of my knowledge, the troy scale has been used to weigh gold for a lot longer than that.
That was a fun little stroll through my statistics. Hopefully the fact that I used “fetish” and “sex” in a post will draw more crazy search terms.
How did you find me? Inquiring minds want to know, so please tell me in the comments.