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Nigella Lawson and the High Cost of divorce

Nigella Lawson Eats A Banana (Photo credit: Kaptain Kobold)

Heartache and heartbreak are hard enough to endure but imagine having to go through the loss of a relationship while the world looks on. Such is the high price of celebrity divorce and the latest victim is the beautiful and talented television chef, Nigella Lawson. Shocking photos of Nigella apparently being choked by her husband, Charles Saatchi, surfaced in the media following the June 9th dinner at Scott’s restaurant in Mayfair, London, where the incident occurred. Saatchi’s advisors urged him to humble himself and admit a public apology for the assault. Saatchi denied any wrongdoing, saying he never assaulted her and in fact, was actually removing mucous from his wife’s nose. Nigella was stunned by the admonition of “nose-picking” and his refusal to apologize. She left Saatchi and their family home in Chelsea.

The two sides continued to disagree about the pictures; Saatchi claiming it was just a “playful tiff” and Lawson hurt and humiliated by the public’s assumption of her as victim of domestic violence and her husband as her tormentor. Insult was added to injury on July 7th, when Saatchi announced his intent to divorce his wife in the media instead of directly to her. Lawson, who had been waiting for a public apology, was blind-sided by his cruel divorce announcement. Lawson and Saatchi have been married for 10 years; Saatchi has claimed that the couple had become “estranged” the last few years. Saatchi claims that he had no choice but to act publicly since his wife “failed to defend” him with a statement to the media. In fact, Lawson has remained silent at the advice of her publicist so as not to further affect their children. Lawson (53) and Saatchi (70) have three teenage children from previous marriages that they were raising together.In addition to the “he said, she said” controversy, Lawson and Saatchi will have to fight over $150 million in shared assets, including their $12 million Chelsea, West London home. Both brought substantial assets into the marriage. Charles Saatchi is worth $100 million from the high-profile, highly-successful New York advertising firm, Saatchi and Saatchi. Nigella Lawson is a celebrity chef, bestselling author and television star with a net worth of $15 million. By the time lawyers for both sides duke it out in court and attempt to untangle the shared assets, those net worths will be considerably less.But it’s not just a monetary cost to this celebrity divorce. Saatchi had grown increasingly resentful of his wife’s high-profile career that he helped established. It’s a common theme in celebrity couples; one partner becomes the higher earner or the more recognized celebrity and the other gets bit by that green-eyed monster, jealousy. In Nigella’s case, there is the public humiliation at the hands of someone she loves to endure. It seems that Saatchi is determined to do whatever he can to make her suffer in the media. And then there are the children; children always suffer in a divorce. It can be lessened when parents work together to keep it private and amicable. But it’s incredibly painful to have your lives dragged through the media. In this case, it is Nigella and Saatchi’s children that are paying the ultimate price.

I Smell a Scam

Finance

I hate scammers. Whether it’s the garage-sale shoplifter, telemarketing “charities” with 99% overhead, 3-card-monte

shell game (Photo credit: mixatal (Clive Power))

dealers, or the guy who begs Grandma for cash every week, they all need to be strung up. Since vigilante justice is generally illegal and occasionally immoral, it’s best to just avoid the problems from the start. Here are some scams to watch out for.

Pyramid Scams – All of the little parties people throw to earn free items at the expense of their friends are pyramid schemes. Most of those are legitimate money-sinks. A few, however, exist solely to get their “consultants” to bring in more consultants. The sales aren’t the actual way to make money. If you don’t have anyone “downstream” you won’t make any money. If the focus isn’t on selling an actual product or service, but is instead on bringing in people under you, you have entered the world of pyramid scams. Generally illegal and always immoral. Don’t sign up and, if you do, don’t ask me to participate.

Advance Fees and Expensive Prizes – If you win a contest and you are expected to send money to claim your prize, it is a scam. You don’t have to pay sales tax in advance. You don’t have to pay transfer fees. Real prizes are delivered free, accompanied by a 1099, because prizes are income. No prize requires pre-payment. No loan service requires “finder’s fees”. If it doesn’t sound right, don’t pay it and certainly don’t give your bank information to anyone you can’t verify.

Work at Home – The most common work-at-home job I’ve found is stuffing envelopes. You see the signs on telephone poles all over the city. “Make $10/hour stuffing envelopes from the comfort of your own home! Just send $50 to….” When you get the instructions, you are told to hand up signs telling people to send you $50 for instructions on how to make $10/hour stuffing envelopes. Everybody is feeding off of everybody else.

Charity – Never give money to a charity over the phone. Always take the time to verify where you are sending your money. Some freak may call to tug on your heartstrings with a sob story, but you don’t have to give them money. At least ask them to send it in writing so you can do some checking, first.

Phishing – Simply put, don’t click on any link in any email, unless you know where it is going. If it is a link to a financial institution, go enter the address into the address bar yourself. If you find yourself on a site you don’t recognize, don’t give them your personal information and don’t ever reuse your usernames and passwords. If you do, one bad site could get access to everything you do online.

[ad name=”inlineleft”]Foreign Lottery – To be clear, Spain did not just hold a international lottery and randomly draw your email address. No lottery in the world works that way. If you didn’t enter the lottery while you were in Spain, you aren’t going to win it. The scam is that you need to provide your bank information, including a number of release forms so the scammers can transfer money to you. In reality, you are signing over control of your account and will be wiped out.

Nigerian/419 Emails – Ex-Prince WhateverHisNameIs wants your help to get his fortune out of WhereverHeIsFrom. The New Widow Ima F. Raud has an inheritence that she won’t live long enough to spend. They’ve both been given your name as a trustworthy person to handle the transactions in exchange for a mere $10 million. What friends do you have that would make this seem legitimate? Once again, they will get your bank information and take your money. At a minimum, they will try to get you to pay a few thousand dollars for “Transfer fees”. Don’t do it.

Overpayment by Wire – I had this one attempted on my last week. You sell something online. A potential buyer agrees to purchase the item, sight-unseen. They’ll send a cashier’s check and, after it clears, one of their agents will pick it up. Unfortunately, the buyer’s secretary screwed up and added a zero to the check. Would you mind wiring the overpayment back, minus a small fee for the hassle? The check is bogus and there is no way to verify it. You’ll deposit the check and it will be assumed to be real. The bank will make the funds available well before it comes back as fraud. You’ll see the available funds and send the money by non-refundable Western Union and some thug in Nigeria gets a new iPhone.

Foreclosure Scams – Some scammers try to prey on the vulnerable because they are, well, vulnerable. If you are facing foreclosure, be very careful about where you turn for help. One scam is to get you to sign over your home “temporarily” to clear the title. That doesn’t work, but you won’t find that out until you are handed an eviction notice and told you still owe the money.

Stranded Friends – You get an email from a friend saying he’s in London/Moscow/Sydney/Wherever, and he’s been mugged. He’s got nothing and needs $2500 to get home. Can you help? Do you really have friends close enough to ask for a $2500 international bailout, but not so close they tell you about the vacation ahead of time? Would they really be too timid to call you collect instead of begging for change to use an internet cafe?

Fat guy running

Life

As part of my effort to improve every part of my life, I have decided to get back in shape. Twelve years ago, I worked in a factory during the day and cooked in a resaurant in the evening. I didn’t have a car, so I biked 5 miles in between my jobs. Fast forward 3 kids, a desk job, and 100 pounds later. I don’t enjoy getting winded on three flights of stairs and I like running while my daughter rides her bike. I’m going to get back in shape.

As a part of that effort, I recently bought a bike. I thought I was getting it for a steal, until I took it out. The chain kept slipping, the shifters were difficult, and it was too small for my frame. I took it back. A bike that would work well for me would cost $200-300, more than currently fits in my budget. Running is cheap, right? It is, unless I go for the runner-geek purchases. Every hobby and activity can become expensive if you let it. I may invest in some running shoes, but that will be the extent of my runner-geek shopping.

My plan was to run according to this this schedule, running every other day. Run one day, rest the next. The first day in week 3, I got petellofemoral pain, or “runner’s knee”. I went to the doctor and got x-rayed. There is nothing even hinting at major damage, which has always been a fear of mine, due to my barometer knee pain. The doctor gave me a sheet of stretching and strengthening exercises to do and told me to put running on hold for a bit. I will be doing the exercises every day this week. Next week, I’m starting over with my running schedule. I will be giving my knees an ice massage after each run and doing the exercises on the off days.[ad name=”inlineleft”]

I am writing this in October and have been running for half of September. Hopefully, the city will keep the roads plowed enough that I can run all through the winter. The schedule may slow down a bit, depending on weather, but I’m hopeful. By the time this posts, I will have a lot more information about how well I am doing.

Update: Mid-November. Where did the last month go? It’s amazing how fast time slips away if you aren’t watching it. My barometer knee pain has been back, and life has been hectic. I need to get his habit going again, before it freezes to much to start.

Selling on Craigslist

Finance

The vast majority of personal finance websites(including this one) focus on reducing your bottom line–cutting costs. The other end of the budget is at least as important. Have you tried raising your top line lately? Have you picked up a side hustle, sold an article, put ads on a website, or even sold some of your stuff? After we had our garage sale a few weeks ago, we were left with some furniture that was too nice to donate or discard, so we decided to sell it on Craigslist.

The key to selling your stuff on Craigslist is taking pictures. They don’t have to be good pictures, just something to let your customers know what they are getting. Take pictures, post the measurements and, if it’s electronic, the model number. Beyond that, a simple description will suffice.

Be safe when you are posting the listing. Don’t give your address and don’t post when you will be home. That’s just a job offer for burglars. When you talk to a potential buyer, never tell them there is nobody home. Tell them your roommate is the only one home and he doesn’t want to deal with the sale. Don’t give strangers on the internet an opportunity to rob you.

When you are meeting a buyer, pick a public place away from home, if at all possible. If you are selling furniture, it may not be possible, but it is for smaller items. Meeting in a busy gas station parking lot or even in front of the police department is a good way to stay safe. Secondary crime scenes are nasty things and inviting the wrong stranger in is offering one ready-made.

[ad name=”inlineleft”]Bring a friend. Preferably, an intimidating friend. Crime is less likely to happen if there is more than one person there. Bring a friend to a public place to meet the buyer to maximize your safety.

Don’t get ripped off. Craigslist scams abound. Bad checks, forged checks, and shipping scams are just some of the problems.

Only accept cash. It’s hard to forge a greenback.

One of the most common scams, after a bounced check, is the cashier’s check scam. You’ll get an email saying the item is great and payment is on the way. When the check clears, a relative of the buyer will come to pick up the item. Then, oops, their secretary made the check out for $3000, instead of $300. Would you mind sending the overpayment back by Western Union, minus $100 for your troubles? First sign of trouble: over-complicating a simple transaction. Second sign: not using cash. The cashier’s check will be forged. There is no way to verify funds on a cashier’s check, and the bank will post it as available well before it comes back bad. You will be able to spend the money, only to have the money disappear later. That means you can’t wait to see if the check clears before wiring back the overpayment. There is no way to recover your money.

If you get a response that includes a link, do not click it! Ever. No matter what the link looks like. Ever. No clickyclicky. It may be an innocuous link to your ad, but the link can be masked. Any other link is almost definitely a link to a virus-ridden website. Repeat after me: No clickyclicky.

If you get an email about Craigslist transaction protection or escrow, you are being scammed. Run away.

Craigslist can be great way to turn your junk into cash, but only if you actually get the cash. Keep yourself safe and scam-free.

Cheap Conference Calls

Business

Sometimes, a conference call can make you thousands of dollars. Whether you’re pitching a product, or planning a new service to offer, sometimes you need to be able to talk with a team.

Business owners rely on many technological tools to conduct business day to day. Online business conferencing is one of the more popular services that owners have come to rely on. There are lots of online websites that provide free conference calling services that will save the small business owner some cash. Some of these sites offer permanent free calling for life and others offer free calling for a limited time only.

Free Conference Calls

There are a number of free conference call services out there. For most, you can use the site and get unlimited free conference calling 24 hours a day and seven days a week. This is a permanent full time offer and no credit card is needed with the best of the service. You can often conference with up to 96 different users at the same time and spend at least six hours on each call. That is more than enough time for the average business owner to conduct all of their all business with fellow participants.

Skype

Skype is another company that has a free business conferencing service for all Skype users. There is no fee for conference calls as long as all of the users have downloaded Skype. Anyone that wishes to use their mobile phone to join in can be added by purchasing Skype Credit. Payments can be made online or through payment processing services like PayPal. This is a cheap way for a small business owner to connect with team members via conference call.

Go To Meeting

GoTomeeting.com is the most well known of the companies providing conference calling services. The company offers its GoToMeeting, GoToWebinar, and GoToTraining that provide unlimited usage for business owners. Basic plans start at $15 a month which is a bargain for owners that have frequent conference calls with employees and customers. At the high end of their offering is GoToTraining at $150 per month. GoToMeeting has a lot of features including the recording and playback of all meetings. This is a useful option for any attendee that misses a meeting and needs to catch up.

These are just a few of the options available to the business owner who is on a budget and looking for a way to stay connected with his employees.

Let me check….

Finance

A few days ago, I asked a coworker if she wanted to go out for lunch. She said she’d have to check her bank account before she decided.

What?

If you have to check your bank balance to know if you can afford something, you can’t afford it. It really is that simple.

Now, strict budgets aren’t for everyone, but everyone should know how much money they have available to spend. If you don’t know what you have to spare, you need to set up a budget.

Period.

After you’ve done that, you can ignore it, with the exception of knowing how much you have available to blow on groceries, entertainment, and other discretionary purchases.

If you don’t know where your money needs to go, how can you determine how much you can spend on the things you want?

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