Heartache and heartbreak are hard enough to endure but imagine having to go through the loss of a relationship while the world looks on. Such is the high price of celebrity divorce and the latest victim is the beautiful and talented television chef, Nigella Lawson. Shocking photos of Nigella apparently being choked by her husband, Charles Saatchi, surfaced in the media following the June 9th dinner at Scott’s restaurant in Mayfair, London, where the incident occurred. Saatchi’s advisors urged him to humble himself and admit a public apology for the assault. Saatchi denied any wrongdoing, saying he never assaulted her and in fact, was actually removing mucous from his wife’s nose. Nigella was stunned by the admonition of “nose-picking” and his refusal to apologize. She left Saatchi and their family home in Chelsea.
Saturday Roundup and Updates
I’ve decided to do away with the Twitter posts on Saturdays. If you want to see the glorious wisdom that is my Twitter feed, follow me on Twitter. I’m @LiveRealNow.
Please take a moment to subscribe to Live Real, Now by email. You get a choice between having all of the posts delivered to your inbox, or just occasional updates and deals. Both options get my Budget Lessons, free of charge.
Now, for the part you’ve all been waiting for…
The Best Posts of the Week!
Tim Ferris is giving away a trip to anywhere in the world. All you have to do is donate to his preferred charity for his birthday!
A Mirrored Memory reminds us that nobody feels old in their heart.
A law for everything and everything is a law? Why can’t people just accept occasional discomfort or unpleasantness in exchange for freedom?
My wife hates sweet potatoes. Well, she did until I introduced her to sweet-potato fries. I wonder if I can get her to try this recipe? It’s missing marshmallows, though. That’s a definite culinary failure when it comes to sweet-potatoes.
The University of Georgia is offering a free home-study food-preservation course.
Carnivals I’ve particpated in:
The Carnival of Personal Finance at NerdWallet has included Beat the Check.
The Festival of Frugality at Modern Tightwad has included The 10-Step Saving Action Plan.
Stealing Motivation
We go a bit overboard on Halloween.
Maybe more than a bit. The yard in the video is mine. As I write this, I’ve got 40 tombstones, more than 200 skulls, and half a dozen life-size props in my yard. The coffin leaning against the tree was bought used on the secondhand coffin market.
I have a motion-activated monster whose eyes light up as his head turns to watch you as you walk past. He just happens to be the exact size in all dimensions as my son was 4 years ago.
A few years ago, I built a beautiful zombie who–not so coincidentally–had the exact height and proportions as my wife.
Last year, a few days before Halloween, somebody came into my yard and stole my bride. They also tried stealing the small coffin, but only managed to get away with the lid, leaving the coffin itself behind.
I hate thieves.
This year, I was at the Financial Bloggers Conference the weekend I traditionally set up for Halloween, so I was getting a late start.
Every time I’ve tried to get out and set up my yard, I just keep thinking about the irreplaceable pieces that were stolen. Do you have any idea how hard it is to find a child-sized coffin lid dating back to 1863? Or how impossible it is to get the 100 hours of my life I put into my zombie?
I think about how hurt I would be if somebody stole my son-sized animatronic ghoul or the demon who shares my measurements, but is two feet shorter. I’ve spent hundreds of hours per year, over 10 years building my yard full of one-of-a-kind props, and someone felt it was acceptable to tear down a section of my skull fence, come into my yard, and steal a little piece of my life.
Motivation has been difficult this year.
Last night, while I was out arranging my much-reduced yard haunt, a neighbor came by to let me know that he was disappointed with the smaller production. He wasn’t upset, but he–like the entire neighborhood–love watching the gore grow in my yard while anticipating the evening full of screams as the kids wander through every Halloween.
I can’t do it.
The thieving punks stole not just two of my favorite props, but a huge piece of my desire to scare the neighborhood kids.
Maybe I just need a year off, so I can come back with better ideas and a security plan more detailed than “my neighbors love this, none of them would steal anything!”
I would love to find the thieves. Post-beating, I’d explain how stealing from anyone is stealing a small and irreplaceable part of their lives. Stealing their handcrafted treasure is ripping out a piece of their soul. Stealing their motivation is stealing the memories for every visitor who would ever benefit from their craft, if the motivation is dead enough to kill the production.
I hope I’m not to that point, yet, but I can’t promise anything. Maybe next year.
Future Me Returns
This is a conversation between me and my future self, if my financial path wouldn’t have positively forked 2 years ago. The transcript is available here.
What would your future self have to say to you?
What to Take Away From John Cleese’s Divorce
If you haven’t been kept under a rock your whole life, you’re likely familiar with actor and comedian John Cleese. Part of the infamous Monty Python crew, he starred in films such as Monty Python’s Quest for the Holy Grail, and television shows such as Faulty Towers. However, are you familiar with what has happened to Mr. Cleese financially over the past few years?
When Cleese divorced his third wife she ended up with a divorce settlement that quite literally made her richer than him, despite the fact that they were married for only 16 years and had produced no children.
Divorce is, unfortunately, a fixture of modern society, and people of both sexes need to know how they can protect their personal finances in case of a divorce. After all, these days more than 50% of marriages end in divorce, so not preparing yourself financially for it is engaging is some rather wishful thinking. So how best to protect yourself and your personal finances, should you be unfortunate enough to have to go through one?
If you are the higher-earning party, get a pre-nup prior to marriage; this simply cannot be overemphasized. Cleese himself, already married to wife number four, incidentally, was told that he should have her sign a prenuptial agreement, he initially didn’t want to, despite having just been taken to the proverbial cleaners. He only reluctantly had one written up when his legal team essentially insisted. Even though prenups can be challenged or modified in court, if you are the party bringing more assets to the relationship, it is irresponsible of you not to solicit a prenuptial agreement from a potential spouse.
Another thing to keep in mind is that you should protect assets you have in joint accounts with your spouse, and also begin to actively monitor your credit, if things become acrimonious between you two. This way, you will prevent them from absconding with the totality of your shared funds, or ruining your credit if they are feeling malicious. If you need further information on how to do this properly, speak with a qualified financial planner.
So if you find yourself considering marriage and either have significant assets to protect or suspect you might have them in the future, you owe it to yourself to look into the legalities surrounding prenuptial agreements, and other thorny issues related to personal finance. Failure to do so can end up seriously impacting your life in a negative way, should you ever be faced with a vindictive or greedy spouse; protect yourself!
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Does Amanda Bynes Need a Conservatorship?
The publicly documented downward spiral of Amanda Bynes may be reaching its breaking point. She has been on psychiatric lockdown for the past three days, and her parents are petitioning for conservatorship in California
on the grounds that they believe she is suffering from acute schizophrenia. They claim that the troubled starlet is unable to make safe decisions regarding her own well-being, not to mention the safety of others. The issue is complex, but the former childhood star has demonstrated that she meets the criteria to have external guardians instated to protect her from unpredictably irrational behaviors.
This was not the first criminal case against Bynes; she is also dealing with hit-and-run allegations in California. It was also not her last interaction with the police. Most recently, the actress doused an elderly woman’s driveway in gasoline and set it ablaze. She accidentally covered a puppy in the flammable liquid, so she ran down the block looking for something to save the animal from catching fire. After ransacking a convenience store, officers accosted her. The exchange resulted in the psychiatric hold that has been placed on Bynes.
Unfortunately, grounds for conservatorship can be exceedingly challenging to meet. Clear proof of mental illness needs to provided, and the standards are rigidly strict; however, if anyone has showcased the fanatical craziness that constitutes a lack of personal responsibility, it is Amanda Bynes.
Her schizophrenia is no longer dormant. The actress has become obsessed with plastic surgery, and she has deformed her face with cheek piercings. She uses online social networks to decry public figures for their ugliness. Victims of this attack include even Barack and Michelle Obama. Furthermore, she makes offensive sexual remarks towards rappers, and she wants to be a hip-hop artist herself. She has spent fortunes on a wig collection, and she employs a different style at every court appearance. The actress even used one as a disguise for an incognito trip to a trampoline emporium.
Anyone that has seen her Nickelodeon program would not be shocked to learn that she was schizophrenic. The role had her switching between dozens of identities for different skits, and she even played a character that was, in effect, obsessively stalking the star herself. “The Amanda Show” was neurotically fast-paced. Ultimately, the entire program can now be viewed as an eerie foreshadowing to the budding of a latent psychological disorder. If the legal standards of insanity are not met, then she will be free to wreak havoc on herself and others.