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February 30 Day Project #1: Romantic Gestures

For the month of February, I had two 30 Day Projects: Do 100 pushups in a single set and another, that I haven’t posted. Until now.

The reason I haven’t posted anything about the second project is because it would have ruined it. I set a goal to do something nice for my wife every single day. It’s really a much harder goal than it sounds. Between juggling wrestling practice, crabby kids, the usual winter illnesses and deadlines at work, finding time to arrange for anything special presents a challenge, and I wanted it to be a surprise.

This morning, the last day of the month, I made breakfast in bed. While she was eating, I handed her a letter and set a present on the floor next to the bed. The present was one of our wedding invitations, framed, and the closing of our wedding ceremony in a matching frame.

The letter reads:

Dearest,

As you know, I’ve been working on a series of thirty-day projects.   In January, I got up at 5 every day and read to the girls almost every day.   If February, my project has been to get to 100 pushups in a single set.   Almost.

I worked at that and accomplished it, but it was really a cover project. I love you and wanted a way to express that. So, my main project has been you.

In the first week of the month, we had two snowstorms, do you remember? For each one, I made sure to get your truck cleaned off before you were ready to go to work, with fresh coffee.   At the beginning of the week, you got a full 30 minute backrub, with absolutely no hidden motive. At the end of the week, I sent you a letter expressing my feelings. Over the weekend, you had no diapers to do–I think you ended up with one–and I let you sleep in as late as you wanted on Sunday.   It was a good first week.

The second week, there was another snowstorm on Monday. Combining that with the grocery shopping kept me from having time to do anything on Monday, but Tuesday, you woke up to a clean truck again. Wednesday, there were flowers. Thursday, dinner.   Game night at [friend’s house]? That was planned, by me, 3 weeks in advance.   Over the weekend, I watched the kids so you could go to [cousin’s] to relax, and you got breakfast in bed on Sunday. I may have missed a day, but the week was still a success, I think.

The following week, while you were getting ready for bed, you saw me go outside and asked about it. Thankfully, the girls woke up, because I had just put a note in your truck telling you 10 things I love about you.   I also took all of the kids to wrestling–twice–to give you some sanity time and gave you another long backrub. This was also the week you got sick, which meant a day in bed for you, instead of me being able to plan something nice.

This week, the last week of the month, I took all of the kids to wrestling again, giving you a chance to take a nice, relaxing bath. Those were originally planned to be two separate nights.   Instead, it was combined into one night.   I also managed to go shopping to buy the components of the present I am giving you, put the present together, and write this letter. Last night, our date was a part of this, and today, so is breakfast.

My goal has been to do something nice for you, every day. So now, for an entire month, you have been the focus of my dedicated attention, nearly every single day. I’ve felt closer to you, than I have in a while.   Have you enjoyed the attention?

Happy Valentine’s Month.

The actual expenses were the flowers, the frames, dinner and a movie, and a buy-in for Texas Hold ‘Em at her cousin’s house. Everything else was done with what we have, gifts of time and energy instead of money.

Total cost: $159 for an entire month of romantic gestures. Money well-spent, for sure.

Update: This post has been included in the Money Hacks Carnival.

The Game of Thrones Guide to Personal Finance

Finance

The Game of Thrones series was something I tried to avoid for a while as an HBO-hyped soft-core way to steal an hour of an audience’s life every week.

Then I read the first book. Within minutes of finishing it, I downloaded the second, followed by the rest.

I haven’t seen the show, but I have read all of the books. If you are into court intrigue and gratuitous sex and violence, you’ll enjoy the series.

If you aren’t into those things, you can still pick up some good financial lessons from the series.

Everything you care about will die.

You may not have to worry about your son shooting you in the stomach with a crossbow, or your foster-son burning your castle down while you’re away, but bad things happen. Your company will close or your car will break down or your refrigerator will die. Allow me to repeat myself: Bad things happen. Prepare for them now.

What will you do if one of your appliances break, or your kid needs braces? After the emergency is the wrong time to start thinking about it.

Money solves a lot of problems.

If you’ve got some money set aside, whether it’s a repair fund, and emergency fund, or just a mayonnaise jar full of cash buried in the backyard, it’s going to help you survive life’s little upsets. You don’t need enough to buy an opposing army’s loyalty, just enough to get you through whatever financial emergency is currently rocking your world.

You can’t buy loyalty.

Even if you sell your sister to the barbarians in exchange for their fighting prowess, you can’t rely on that. Don’t think that buying a car for your kid is a good replacement for spending time with her, or that a fancy vacation can take the place of regular, meaningful conversations with your wife. Money solves a lot of things, but it can’t take the place of actually being there for your loved ones. Your presence means more than your presents.

It all boils down to this:

Bad things happen, but you can protect yourself with a combination of money and meaningful relationships.

Mastermind – The Best Personality Type

Life

Image via Wikipedia

A few of the best personal finance blogs have decided to post on a theme. It’s a personality type blog carnival.

After taking the Jung Typology Test, I discovered that I am an INTJ; a Rational Mastermind. Specifically I am I(78%) N(12%) T(75%) J(44%).

What does that mean, you ask?

It means that I am rare. Fewer than 3% of the population has my personality type, which is Introvert iNtuition Thinking Judgement, but the intuition is close to Sensing, making me almost an ISTJ, or a Guardian Inspector.

From Wikipedia:

I – Introversion preferred to extraversion: INTJs tend to be quiet and reserved. They generally prefer interacting with a few close friends rather than a wide circle of acquaintances, and they expend energy in social situations (whereas extraverts gain energy).
N – Intuition preferred to sensing: INTJs tend to be more abstract than concrete. They focus their attention on the big picture rather than the details and on future possibilities rather than immediate realities.
T – Thinking preferred to feeling: INTJs tend to value objective criteria above personal preference. When making decisions they generally give more weight to logic than to social considerations.
J – Judgment preferred to perception: INTJs tend to plan their activities and make decisions early. They derive a sense of control through predictability, which to perceptive types may seem limiting.
S – Sensing preferred to intuition: ISTJs tend to be more concrete than abstract. They focus their attention on the details rather than the big picture, and on immediate realities rather than future possibilities.

To summarize the personality of a mastermind: We are big-picture planners. We see patterns other people miss and use that to solve complex puzzles and problems. It’s not possible to follow a thought through the head of a mastermind, because thinking comes with a ton of free association. We may be watching an episode of Spongebob, and something Patrick does will trigger a domino-effect of seemingly unrelated thoughts that will lead a conclusion, out of nowhere. Often, we aren’t aware of the process.

We don’t do crowds, at least, not often. Good conversation with good friends is better than a party full of people we barely know. Crowds are draining. A quiet night at home is a good night, but that’s not saying we-re shy. We just don’t enjoy keeping up with small talk and polite chatter. Get us on a topic we’re passionate about and you won’t shut us up. Get us in a group of people we care about, and we can be the life of the party.

As a group, we are ambitious and deliberate. We are capable of making firm decisions, confidently. Confidence is one of the hallmarks of a mastermind, but one I don’t have to the normal extreme.

We are ~~obsessive~~ focused. When we get set on a problem, we focus in a way that leaves other people stupefied. Time goes away. The rest of the world fades. You may have to shout to get our attention. Sometimes, our minds will drift in the middle of a conversation, and we’ll lose track of who’s saying what. It’s rude, but that doesn’t change the way we are wired.

We don’t do emotion. We are rational and get frustrated with people who make decisions based on emotion. This makes it hard to connect with others, but that’s okay, because it’s better to have a few extremely close friends than a crowd of mere acquaintances. Unfortunately, this can make relationships difficult, too. The benefit to dating or marrying an INTJ is that we carry our focus into relationships. We take our relationships seriously.

We are inwardly-focused, so we spend quite a bit of time examining ourselves. This can lead to a long series of self-improvement projects, but none get taken on as a mere fad. They are planned and dissected before even being mentioned to others, let alone undertaken.

We take criticism well, but if you can’t back up the critique with facts and reasoning, don’t bother. Rational, remember?

We are driven by a need to understand. Once we understand, a given project or line of thought may be abandoned. Until we understand, very little can shake our focus.

Self-promotion is difficult, since we don’t get into the heads of others well. They should be able to see the obvious benefits without being told, right?

Now, to cross a bit of the ISTJ into the mix.

An Inspector is duty bound and loyal, to an extreme. They are dependable workhorses. Under stress, they can get stuck on the things that could go wrong, which would explain why I miss out on the confidence brought by being a mastermind.

To summarize me:

I am a planner.
I am extremely focused, to the point of obsession.
I am driven to learn new things, constantly. Few of those things are incorporated into my life, long-term.
I don’t cheat. Taxes, games, relationships, etc.
I am intensely loyal, but to very few people or causes. I don’t end relationships quickly or easily. That said, when it’s time for them to be over, I can break it off with little regret.

Security, improvement, planning, learning, thinking, loyalty, honesty, integrity.

That sounds about right.

Now you know a bit about how I tick. What’s your personality type?

How to Prioritize Your Spending

Finance, Uncategorized

Don’t buy that.

At least take a few moments to decide if it’s really worth buying.

Too often, people go on auto-pilot and buy whatever catches their attention for a few moments. The end-caps at the store? Oh, boy, that’s impossible to resist. Everybody needs a 1000 pack of ShamWow’s, right? Who could live without a extra pair of kevlar boxer shorts?

Before you put the new tchotke in your cart, ask yourself some questions to see if it’s worth getting.

1. Is it a need or a want? Is this something you could live without? Some things are necessary. Soap, shampoo, and food are essentials. You have to buy those. Other things, like movies, most of the clothes people buy, or electronic gadgets are almost always optional. If you don’t need it, it may be a good idea to leave it in the store.

2. Does it serve a purpose? I bought a vase once that I thought was pretty and could hold candy or something, but it’s done nothing but collect dust in the meantime. It’s purpose is nothing more than hiding part of a flat surface. Useless.

3. Will you actually use it? A few years ago, my wife an cleaned out her mother’s house. She’s a hoarder. We found at least 50 shopping bags full of clothes with the tags still attached. I know, you’re thinking that you’d never do that, because you’re not a hoarder, but people do it all the time. Have you ever bought a book that you haven’t gotten around to reading, or a movie that went on the shelf, still wrapped in plastic? Do you own a treadmill that’s only being used to hang clothes, or a home liposuction machine that is not being used to make soap?

3. Is it a fad? Beanie babies, iPads, BetaMax, and bike helmets. All garbage that takes the world by storm for a few years then fades, leaving the distributors rich and the customers embarrassed.

4. Is it something you’re considering just to keep up with the Joneses? If you’re only buying it to compete with your neighbors, don’t buy it. You don’t need a Lexus, a Rolex, or that replacement kidney. Just put it back on the shelf and go home with your money. Chances are, your neighbors are only buying stuff so they can compete with you. It’s a vicious cycle. Break it.

5. Do you really, really want it? Sometimes, no matter how worthless something might be, whether it’s a fad, or a dust-collecting knick-knack, or an outfit you’ll never wear, you just want it more than you want your next breath of air. That’s ok. A bit disturbing, but ok. If you are meeting all of your other needs, it’s fine to indulge yourself on occasion.

How do you prioritize spending if you’re thinking about buying something questionable?

Selling Your Car

Finance

: English: Jalopy car in Joshua Tree National Park in Hidden Valley Campground (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When it’s time to replace your car, most people focus on the new car, instead of the old, but that is ignoring real money. Your old car–unless it has disintegrated–still has value. Sometimes, it’s just time to ask yourself, “When should I sell my car?”

When you’re looking to sell your car (like with We Will Buy Your Car), you generally have several options:

Tow & crush. If your car has been wrecked, doesn’t run, or is just old and beat up, you may be stuck with calling a junkyard and accepting $50 for them to pick up your car and crush it for scrap.
Trade it in. This is probably the least hassle, but–other than #1–doesn’t pay well. Dealerships are willing to pay something under what they will get at a wholesale auction, which is quite a bit less than the blue book value.
Sell it yourself. Now you’re thinking, “He’s going to buy my car! Oh, bother.” It can be a pain, but it’s also the best way to get a decent price for your wheels.

When you sell your car, there are a few things to keep in mind, much like when you sell something on Craigslist.

Don’t be alone. There are bad people in the world, but they don’t like witnesses. Bad things are much less likely to happen if you have company.
Know your price. Specifically, know three price: your dream price, the price that would make you happy, and the absolute lowest price you are willing to accept. Make sure you figure these numbers out ahead of time. Know what you are comfortable with before it comes time to close the deal.
Check IDs. The buyer is going to want to test-drive your car. That’s fine, but you want to make sure you know who is driving off in your car. “Officer, Sumdood took my car. He was wearing jeans.” That won’t get your car back.
Clean it up. Get the car detailed before you show it to a potential buyer. A sparkling-clean car will almost always bring in a few hundred extra dollars. It’s well worth the expense.

Following this plan should make the sale go as smoothly as possible and bring you the most possible money.

Readers, what have you done to dispose of an old car?

This is a sponsored post written to provide some insight into the world of used car retail.