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Multiracial Skinhead Love Triangle

English: A goat
English: A goat (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

“Honey, here on national television, in front of a live studio audience, I’ve got a secret I’d like to share.   You’re not our child’s mother.  I’ve been sleeping with the milkman.  And the goat.  Your mom is the star of my new adult website.  With the goat.  And the milkman.  I’ve got three other families, in three other cities.  I lost the house to my gambling addiction.   Those sores?  Herpesyphiligonoritis.  I got it from the foreign exchange student we hosted before I moved her to Dubuque and married her.  The goat gave her away.  The milkman cried.   Oh, and I wore your panties to the Illinois Nazi reunion.   I know how much you hate Illinois Nazis.  But I still love you.  And your sister.  Especially your sister.  She does that thing with her tongue….”

Why would anyone go on national television to share things like that?

More interesting: why would anybody stay on stage after hearing that?

Stay tuned.

I have this friend.  He bought a couple of cars.  He’s got some issues with money, partially revolving around a need to keep his assets below a certain threshold.   So he put the cars in his girlfriend’s name.  I know, it’s slightly crooked, but that makes the story more fun.

They broke up.

Recently, she called him to say she was suing him for the cars.  She wanted them.  She wanted to hurt him.  She was mean.   Somehow that turned into them agreeing to settle the case on Judge Joe Brown, on national television.

My friend spoke with the show’s producer, then last week, he was flown to California and put up in a hotel for a couple of days.   When he arrived at the TV studio, he was informed that it wasn’t Judge Joe Brown, but a new show that will start airing in the fall called, The Test.   According to CBS, The Test “is a one-hour conflict resolution talk show that will use lie detector and DNA tests to settle relationship and paternity disputes among the guests.”   Coincidentally, CBS also owns Judge Joe Brown.

My friend got on stage with Dr. Phil’s son, Jay McGraw, and was accused of cheating on his girlfriend and stealing her identity.   Lie detectors.  Yelling.  Accusations.

Why did he stay?

He wasn’t given his return plane ticket until they were done filming.

When he was done, they handed him a voucher for cab fare and the itinerary for his return flight.  Until then, he had no other way to get home.

That’s why people stay on stage.  It’s probably also why none of those shows ever have people with money of their own; they can find their own way home in a pinch.

Interesting side note:  The show paid $200  and booked the cheapest possible return flight, with a 6 hour layover.

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Born to Launch

I’ve recently discovered something about myself: I like doing new things.

More to the point of this post: I like making new things.

I also like learning new things.

Unfortunately, once the newness wears off, I start to lose interest.

I’m a software engineer, so I regularly build new things and solve new puzzles.  When a project gets into maintenance mode and the new stuff ends, I want to chuck the whole thing in the river and move on.

That carries over into other things, too.  Start a business, lock down some skills, get some customers, then enter maintenance mode.  Boring.

Pick up a new hobby, achieve a basic level of mastery, watch it stop being fun.

Play a new video game, get good at it, get bored.

It’s a flaw in my character and it’s a pretty serious flaw.  Soon after I reach the point where I can fly with a new skill or project, I quit wanting to do it.

When it quits being new, it quits being fun.

When I pick up a new hobby, I get good at it, I get bored with it, so the setup equipment tends to collect dust.

Some of this is work stuff, which isn’t supposed to be fun.  If it were, they wouldn’t call it “work”, they’d call it “happy fun time”.

Some of this could replace work stuff, but I’m not sure how to power through when I hit this particular wall.  Just making money doesn’t keep something exciting.  If I’m not excited, it’s hard to stay motivated, which is probably why I let the dishes pile up. (Sorry, honey!)

There is a good side to this flaw:  I’m never bored.  I fill notebooks with the things I want to do next, from blacksmithing lessons to building a foreign language learning site.  I have absolute confidence that I’ll never be bored for long, and I’ll never be short of new ways to make money, but that doesn’t make me feel stable.

I have a need for stability, and I have a need for new.   Finding that balance is a challenge.

Maybe I just need to launch things faster to build a bigger safety net.   That would let me revel in the new without putting my lifestyle at risk.

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Tootsie – Does Beauty Have to be Expensive?

Cover of "Tootsie - 25th Anniversary Edit...
Cover of Tootsie – 25th Anniversary Edition

Many remember Dustin Hoffman dressed in drag in the classic film Tootsie, a movie that he now says made him realize how many women he’s missed out on meeting in life simply because he judged them by their looks. Every year women spend thousands of dollars on beauty products and cosmetics, hoping to increase their appearance and become attractive enough to the outside world. Although there are various degrees of beauty, it undoubtedly is usually determined by the amount of money spent to enhance features and upkeep the overall look.

Although natural beauty does exist in our society, it is few and far between to find a woman who needs a minimal amount of makeup and hair product to appear beautiful enough to meet society’s standards. Styled, highlighted hair is crucial for an attractive look, requiring professional services to be done on the hair by a salon. Although it may be cheaper to spend $5 on a box of hair dye at the supermarket, the hair won’t look as full or healthy without a professional technique applied. A woman’s hair is bound to look more attractive by spending the extra $100 by visiting a stylist who knows their craft.

The length of a woman’s hair often creates a more attractive look in the U.S., which is difficult to achieve with flat irons and curlers that create breakage and brittle hair from the heat. Women are now resorting to having hair extensions installed every three to five months to achieve beautiful hair that has a fuller texture and longer length, costing an average of $700. They can resort to shorter hair that saves a large amount of money, but they’re ultimately compromising a large part of their looks.

There’s a reason that celebrities appear more beautiful than the rest of the population, as their high school photos often show them to look like typical people. By spending thousands of dollars on personal trainers, stylists, and makeup artists, their appearance is immediately enhanced with the finest tools and products on the market. They are also able to have help with experts who have more knowledge on what creates the best look for their features.

Although beauty does not have to be expensive (just look at exotic women in Columbia and Brazil who are anything but high maintenance), it unfortunately is a requirement in the U.S. where rich housewives rule the reality shows and runways. True beauty is often defined by breast and waist sized, which few women can live up to, resulting in thousands of dollars spent on breast implants and liposuction, often impossible to attain otherwise.

Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, but few men will argue that Angelina Jolie is unattractive or that Heidi Klum looks homely. The majority of men can agree when a woman is beautiful, and few women catch attention with a homemade manicure and dyed hair that came from a box. Perhaps going au natural will become a new trend in the coming years, but for now it’s expensive to be a woman, and even more costly to be a beautiful one.

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Charlie Hunnam and the Success of 50 Shades of Grey

Charlie Hunnam
Charlie Hunnam (Photo credit: Gage Skidmore)

It looks like actor Charlie Hunnam is all set to cash in on the biggest romance novel of the decade. He is set to play the lead role of Christian Grey in the film adaptation of the salacious hit novel 50 Shades of Grey directed by Sam Taylor-Johnson.

Charlie Hunnam, with his English good looks and charm, will definitely make the fantasies of so many women into a reality. Born in Newcastle-upon-Tyne in 1980, Hunnam is already well known in the UK for his portrayal of Nathan Maloney in the television show Queer as Folk. He is also fresh off his recent role in the summer blockbuster Pacific Rim. Now, he will delve into the alternative, sexy, and edgy role of Christian Grey, the hero of the novels written by E.L. James.

With 70 million copies of the BDSM-themed trilogy sold around the world, even the novels themselves are a runaway success. Hunnam himself stands to make quite a bit of money off the film adaptation. If the initial film is a success on the level of Twilight, then Hunnam could easily become an A-list actor in Hollywood, which would boost the amount of money he earns per film. If the novels continue to be adapted into films, then he will be set for at least another few years. Who wouldn’t feel comfortable knowing they were starring in a saucy summer film that would be a guaranteed blockbuster? However, Hunnam didn’t jump straight away to become Christian Grey – he turned down the role at first, but then reconsidered it later. If the buzz surrounding the film means anything, then it’s a good thing that Hunnam changed his mind!

Production work on the film will begin in October 2013, and a release date has been scheduled for August 1st, 2014. With the recent announcement of the lead actors, the excitement is building, and it doesn’t seem like it will die down any time soon. It looks as if 50 Shades of Grey will be a wise career move for Charlie Hunnam as a well as a great way to boost his annual salary.

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Net Worth Update

Now that my taxes are done and paid for, I thought it would be nice to update my net worth.

In January, I had:

Assets

  • House: $252,900
  • Cars: $20,789
  • Checking accounts: $3,220
  • Savings accounts$6,254
  • CDs: $1,105
  • IRAs: $12,001
  • Investment Accounts: $1,155
  • Total: $297,424

Liabilities

  • Mortgage: $29,982
  • Credit card: $18,725
  • Total: $48,707

Overall: $249,717.00

Here is my current status:

Assets

  • House: $240,100 (-12,800)  Estimated market value according to the county tax assessor.   This will be going down in a few months when the estimates are finalized for the year.  I don’t care much about this number.  We’re not moving any time soon, so the lower the value, the lower the tax assessment.
  • Cars: $15,857 (-4,932)   Kelly Blue Book suggested retail value for both of our vehicles and my motorcycle.
  • Checking accounts: $4,817 (+1,597)   I have accounts spread across three banks.  I don’t keep much operating cash here, so this fluctuates based on how far away my next paycheck is.
  • Savings accounts: $6,418 (+164)   I have savings accounts spread across a few banks.  This does not include my kids’ accounts, even though they are in my name.  This includes every savings goal I have at the moment.  I swept a chunk of this into an IRA to lower my tax bill, which is also why my IRA balance is up as much as it is.
  • CDs: $1,107 (+2)   I consider this a part of my emergency fund.
  • IRAs: $16,398 (+4,397)  I have finally started to contribute automatically.  It’s only $200 at the moment, but it’s something.
  • Investment Accounts:  $308 (-847)  I pulled most of this out and threw it at a credit card.
  • Total: $285,005 (-12,419)

Liabilities

  • Mortgage: $28,162 (-1,820)
  • Credit card: $16,038  (-2,687)  This is the current target of my debt snowball.  This has actually grown a bit over the last week.  I did a balance transfer that cost $400, but it gives me 0% for a year, versus the 9% I was paying.  That will pay for itself in 3 months, while simplifying my payments a bit and saving me almost a thousand dollars in payments this year.
  • Total: $44,200 (-4,507)

Overall: $240,805 (-8,912)

Well, I lost some net worth over the last quarter, but it’s still a good report.  If I disregard the change in value of my house and cars–two thing I have no control over–my overall total would have gone up almost $9,000.

All in all, it’s been a good year for me, so far, though paying off that credit card by fall is going to be a challenge.

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