Search Results for “three-alternatives-to-a-budget/budget-lesson-part-5/debt-burnout/budget-lesson-part-3/budget-lesson-part-1/contact-me/budget-lesson-part-2/budget4/travel-expenses-why-i-splurge/money-problems-day-1-setting-goals” — Page 66

I just turned 2!

Update: Over $500 in prizes!

Yesterday was my second anniversary here. For the last two years, I have shared my thoughts, feelings, and finances three times a week and you have been there to watch and share as I figure out my financial future.

I appreciate it.

To show my appreciation, I’m giving stuff away.

Here are the prizes:

1 $100 prize

1 $75 prize

6 $25 prizes, courtesy of ThirtySixMonths, Budgeting in the Fun Stuff, Maximizing Money, Personal Finance Whiz, and Broke Professionals.

1 iPod Shuffle courtesy of Prairie Eco-Thrifter.

1 $25 Amazon gift card courtesy of Beating Broke.

A copy of each of the iPhone and iPad versions of the Pay Off Debt app from The Debt Myth

1 $20 Amazon gift card, courtesy of Money Crush.

1 $25 Starbuck’s gift card, courtesy of Mom’s Plans.

I’m also giving away some books, some of which have been lightly read.

Financial Peace Revisited by Dave Ramsey

Never Pay Retail by Sid Kirchheimer

Delivering Happiness (advanced reader copy) by Tony Hsieh

I Will Teach You To Be Rich by Ramit Sethi

The Art of Non-Conformity by Chris Guillebeau

CreditCards.com Book of Cartoons

Women & Money by Suze Orman

To enter:

Follow the instuctions in the widget below. Following me on Facebook, Twitter, RSS, or email will all earn entries. Following any of the sponsors on Twitter of Facebook will earn you entries. Tweeting about the giveaway as often as you like or linking to this page on your site will earn you entries.

There are lots of ways to enter and 16 prizes to win.

The drawing will be held on December 23rd, just in time to give you some cash before Christmas.

Good luck!

[Read more…] about I just turned 2!

Filing Bankruptcy: Pride or Shame?

Finance

Schoolchildren line up for free issue of soup ... — Image by State Library of New South Wales collection via Flickr

I’m a big fan of personal responsibility. If you’ve promised to do something, you should do it. With that said, it seems odd to some people that I don’t have an ethical problem with bankruptcy. For some people, it is the only option after a long series of problems.

Don’t get me wrong, it should be a shameful decision. Reneging on your word should never be a source of pride. It should be a difficult decision to make. A couple of years ago, I came very close to making that decision myself.

It should not be a reason to celebrate and it should absolutely not be a reason to behave irresponsibly. Some people don’t see a need to take care of their responsibilities because, when it gets bad, they’ll be able to file bankruptcy and make the creditors go away. They are abusing a safety net. That abuse hurts everyone. Credit card companies have to charge higher interest rates so the paying customers can cover the risk of those who default or file bankruptcy.

There is one prominent local bankruptcy attorney who files every 10 years, and has filed consistently for decades. He runs a thriving practice, so it’s not a matter of poor choices, it’s a matter of deliberately living beyond his means and screwing his creditors. He’s one of the slime-balls that give lawyers a bad name. He is one of the many who abuse a lifeline designed to save people from a life of destitution they didn’t ask for, and he does it to finance his extravagant lifestyle.

If you have found yourself buried in a debt you didn’t plan for, if life threw you a curve-ball that you are entirely unable to deal with, if you have to file bankruptcy, it’s okay. Really. When you go in front of the judge, have the decency not to enjoy it, and try to learn from the experience.

May 30 Day Project

Life

Before I discuss May’s 30 day project, I’m going to talk about April’s.

Last month, my goal was to declutter my entire house. Every room, every closet, every drawer.

I missed the goal.

My wife has gotten behind this project wholeheartedly. She’s had friends over helping almost every weekend. She’s kept the kids occupied while I’ve been working on it. It’s been a team effort, which has been nice. One room at a time, we’ve tackled the entire house, except for a couple of spots.

Our son’s closet isn’t finished. He hasn’t had use of his closet since we moved him into the room he’s in. It’s been the filing center for a couple of business opportunities. Most of it has been cleared out, but not all. It will be finished in the next few days.

Our storage room isn’t done. It pains me to have a “storage room”, but I don’t think its purpose will be changing. Now, however, instead of unopened appliances and boxes of clothes, it’s almost down to just seasonal stuff and things we do need occasionally. We have the Christmas decorations, the pet crates, and a few other things that get used rarely, but do get used. This room used to have a 6-foot cabinet of computer parts, leftover from the days when building/supporting computers was my main side-hustle. That has been reduce to just one box, mostly power cords. The gaming pads and old hard drives are gone. All that’s left for this room is one shelf, and the remainder of another old side-hustle that has some emotional attachment for my wife.

The remaining trouble spots will be cleaned out by this weekend. We’re having a garage sale the following weekend, and it will all be there. We’ve been pricing as we’ve been sorting, so we’re almost ready.

Decluttering an entire house that’s been filled by the horrible habits of two accumulators means we literally have thousands of things we’ll be selling in two weeks. We split our garage with our roommmate. Our stall is full. We’ve got some stuff in the driveway. We’ve got a pile of boxes in the basement, ready to go. Our dining room is full.

Let me repeat that last point: Our dining room is full.

My project for May was supposed to have been having dinner at the table at least 3 nights per week. At the moment, I’m not entirely sure we still have a table. I certainly can’t see it and there is no way to use it for dinner. This project has to be moved.

So, what’s the plan for May? I’m going to tackle June’s project.

I will not use the computer while anyone else is awake, except for household necessities. Household necessities on the computer are almost nonexistent, since I’ve automated almost everything. I balance the checkbook on a monthly basis, and may have to pay a quarterly bill later this month. I’m going to take the time to be with my family, and do something that matters more than Google Reader. That means writing happens after everyone goes to bed, or at 5AM, which will be motivation to keep that wake-up time. Internet on the blackberry counts as computer use.

Family first.

The Happy Challenge

Life

Watch this video.

Done?

Great.

For the cheaters, the part I am most interested in is the bit about reprogramming your brain for happiness. Studies are showing that you can rewire yourself to be happier by doing happy things.

The science is sound. Good things trigger a dopamine reaction. Your body likes dopamine, so you start craving the things that make it happen, which all happen to be good things. As you suffer dopamine withdrawal, you become driven to do what it takes to get your fix.

The process is similar to heroin withdrawal, with no downside.

Hugging your kids(assuming you like them) triggers the reaction. So does sex, successes at work, and beating a video game.

The specific plan mentioned in the video is to write down three things that you are grateful for, once per day, for 21 days in a row. That will begin the self-reinforcing training that can get you hooked on being happy.

That’s a win. 75% of job success is predicted by your attitude. You are 31% more productive when you are happy. You’re also more fun to be around.

That’s a win.

Here’s my challenge:

For the next 21 days, do it. Write down 3 thing you are grateful for. What makes you happy? It’s okay if it’s hard. If it’s hard for you, you need it more than most.

Now, the truly hard part:

Fill out this form every day. Your answers can be as long or as short as you’d like, but there has to be 3 new things every day for 21 days. We’re going to train your brain to look for the positive, so you can’t give me 63 things on day 21. 3 things, 21 days.

On day 22, tell me how the previous 3 weeks have been.

When it’s over, I’ll hold a drawing for everyone who completed the challenge. Not everyone will see this immediately, so I’m going to run the challenge until May 15. That means you have until April 24th to get started.

3 answers per day means three prizes. I’ll give away a total of $250 to three lucky participants. That’s a $125 prize, a $75 prize, and a $50 prize, but you have to obey the rules. 3 things, 21 days in a row.

Be happy. I dare you.

A Brighter Future: 3 Simple Things Parents Can Do to Make a Difference

Finance

[Editor: This is a guest post from my good friend Terra. I’ve know her for–jeez, really–20 years. If you’re looking for a staff writer, hit her up. Seriously. She’s good people.]

Who doesn’t want a brighter future for their child? Book store shelves overflow with parenting advice tomes and how-to guides to make “uber-kids”. Eager parents lap up promises to raise their children’s I.Q., increase their chances to get into college, and improve their social skills.

From books to apps to specialized software, there is a dizzying number of products available to help your child grow into the genius you know he or she is.

But what if I told you that the secrets to increasing your child’s likelihood to succeed in life were absolutely free. Simple things you have complete control over. No batteries or special upgrades required. No matter your income, education level, or what country you live in, these deceptively simple tips offer powerful results.

Make Mealtimes Sacred

Food connects people. From the dawn of time, our species has gathered around the fire, to break bread and share our stories.

In modern times, our schedule can be crazy (between work, social activities, and, you know, life) so having dinner on the table at 6 o’clock every night is not always possible. However, studies consistently show that having a family meal at least 3 times a week has huge benefits for children (from teenagers being less likely to abuse drugs and alcohol, to increased academic success, to reduced risk of developing eating disorders or becoming obese, the implications are impressive). And it doesn’t have to be dinner, any meal will work. Consistency is the key.

Far from being boring, children find the predictable routine of family meals reassuring, promoting warm, fuzzy feelings of closeness and comfort (though teenagers will never admit it). Whether it’s take-out or made from scratch goodness, nothing says “I care about you” like sharing a meal.

Quality matters here, so remove distractions during meal time (turn off the TV, ban phones) and focus on each other. Take this time to reconnect and talk about your day and ask the kids about theirs. Make this time sacred. It matters that much.

Hug Frequently

“We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.” – Virginia Satir, psychotherapist

Receiving a loving hug feels wonderful. But beyond feeling “nice”, hugs literally have the power to heal us and improve our lives.

Hugs have superpowers. A hug has the power to release a “happiness hormone cocktail” of oxytocin (natural antidepressant, promotes feelings of devotion, trust and bonding), dopamine (intense pleasure), and serotonin (elevates mood, negates pain and sadness) in both the giver and receiver. Bonus, hugs are naturally gluten-free, organic, and have no unpleasant side effects.

To get the most benefits, prolonged hugging is recommended, around 20 seconds. A full-body hug stimulates your nervous system while decreasing feelings of loneliness, combating fear, increasing self-esteem, defusing tension, and showing appreciation. However, this hug fest only works its magic if you’re hugging someone you trust. Since children love to be held and cuddled, this is ideal for family bonding. Not so much with that new client you just landed (awkward…).

How does hugging effect children specifically? Children who aren’t hugged have delays in walking, talking, and reading. Hugging boosts self-esteem; from the time we’re born our family’s touch shows us that we’re loved and special. All of those cuddles we give to our children are imprinted on them at a cellular level and will still be imbedded in their nervous system as adults. Hugs today equal the ability to self-love as adults. That’s an awesome gift.

Create a Home Library

We all know how important reading aloud to children is, from infants to teenagers. Reading is one of the most important factors affecting the development of a child’s brain. But reading skills are not hardwired into us; we don’t pop out of the womb quoting “Pride and Prejudice”. Reading skills need to be taught and encouraged.

Parents are a child’s first, and most important, teachers. While children can learn from flashcards and workbooks, nothing is more powerful than seeing your passion for reading. Whether you like it or not, your children are learning from your every move. What you find important, they will find important. No pressure! Teaching reading to your child requires attention, focus, and motivation. It also requires access to books, lots and lots of books.

Libraries are a great resource for developing a love of reading in your child. Most have a thoughtfully arranged children’s area offering story-time and other enrichment opportunities. However, nothing beats having a book to call your own, to hold and cherish, until the edges are worn with love.

Having a well-stocked home library, it turns out, matters. A lot. This study found that having a 500-book library was equivalent to having university-educated parents in terms of increasing the level of education their children will attain. That’s pretty powerful. It doesn’t matter if your family is rich or poor, from North America or Asia, if your parents are illiterate or college-educated, what matters is that you have books in your home.

Don’t’ have the space for 500 books? No worries. Having as few as 20 books in the home still has a significant impact on propelling a child to a higher level of education, and the more books you add, the greater the benefit.

Having a variety of books available makes a difference; especially important are reference books, with history and science texts having the greatest benefit.

No money for books? No Excuse! Dolly Parton’s Imagination Library is a great resource for free, high-quality children’s books. When you sign up, your child is mailed a new book each month until the age of five, addressed to them (a very special thing indeed).

I hope these tips empower you to take action. Small changes can have a big impact on your child’s future. Just remember, it’s not the money you make or the tutor you’ve hired or the new app you’ve installed that will catapult your baby Einstein ahead in life. It’s the quiet moments with you at home, eating, hugging, and reading that will carry them through whatever life brings their way.

Are these things you would like to focus on in your family? Do you have simple parenting tips that have made a difference in your child’s life?

The Unfrugal Meal

Finance, Parenting

I spend a lot of time talking about how to save money here. It’s kind of what I do.

Not today.

Today, I’m going to talk about the best way I’ve wasted money during my vacation this week.

First, so my feelings are completely understood: A vacation is about experiences and memories. I could spend all day at the park with my kids, or I could spend a memorable meal with them. Which will they remember longer?

It ain’t the park. They are there almost every day.

Of course, if the restaurant is McDonald’s they wouldn’t remember for long, either.

Tuesday, after a long day of hands-on, interactive museum-going, we took the kids to a Japanese steakhouse. Teppanyaki, where they cook the food at the table, complete with fire, spatula spinning, and airborne food.

I’m the only one in my family who has seen that before. Honestly, watching the art, the skill, the banter, and the giant fireball leaves me as wide-eyed as my kids.

They loved it.

Watching the chef throw a bowl full of rice across the table made my son’s jaw drop.

Seeing the chef carry fire from one side of the grill to the other on his fingers made my youngest squeal and beg for more fire tricks.

Getting squirted by the chef when he was putting out a flare-up made the middle brat giggle, possibly because the squirt gun was a little kid, dressed up as a fireman, with his pants down. She got “peed” on and loved it.

Aside from cooking-as-a-show, the service was fantastic. There was always a waiter nearby to keep our water glasses full or to provide “little kid” chopsticks, which are modified with rubber band to remove the need for skill to eat. They had the courses perfectly timed. The minute the salad was cleared, the soup was delivered. When that was done, the chef rolled up to start on the rice. My two-year-old was eating white rice without complaint for the first time.

Giggles and squeals. Three days later, they are still talking about it. My 11-year-old, who’s trying so hard to be an unimpressible teenager, says it was the coolest restaurant he’s ever seen.

Frugal, it wasn’t, but the memories were worth the money.

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