Please email me at:
Or use the form below.
[contact-form 1 “Contact form 1”]
The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.
Last night, a friend called me up and asked me to accompany him to the police station. The police had knocked on his door, waking up his girlfriend while he was out. When he called, they wouldn’t tell him why they wanted to talk to him. Was it an ex trying to make his life difficult or one of his employees getting investigated?
This friend has had a number of interactions with the police, but never learned how to deal with them. Before we left, I gave him a crash course in “stay out of jail”.
During an investigation, you are a suspect. They are looking for a conviction. There may be a “good cop” trying to “help you out”, but he is trying to put you in jail. “Protect and Serve” doesn’t mean you. In general, it means society as a whole. During an investigation, they are serving the interests of the prosecutor.
Generally, they are going to look at you–as the target of their investigation–as the enemy. This is normal. They spend all of their time dealing with scumbags and s***heads. Naturally, they start to assume that everyone who isn’t a cop will fall into one of those categories.
Don’t get pissed when they act rude, ignore you, or anything else. It isn’t a lack of professionalism, it’s just a different profession. They are using interrogation techniques that have been proven successful. Ignore it and focus on Lesson 2.
It will feel wrong to disobey the authority you’ve been taught your entire life to obey. You’re not. You are standing by your rights. Nobody cares about your future more than you do. Certainly not the guy investigating you.
The second a police interaction starts to look like they are investigating you, demand your lawyer, then see Lesson 4. When you demand an attorney, they stop asking you questions. You can take it back and start talking, so again, see Lesson 4. It’s your attorney’s job to talk to the police and, if necessary, the media. It’s your job to talk to your attorney.
You don’t need an attorney ahead of time. Criminal defense attorneys are used to getting calls at 3AM. It’s part of their job. If you have a low enough income as defined by whatever jurisdiction you are being investigated in, you can get a public defender. That’s better than nothing, but I’d prefer to hire a professional shark, even if it means mortgaging my future. Prison is a big gamble.
The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.
“Officer, I do not consent to any search and I would like to speak to my attorney.” Remember this. Memorize it.
They need probable cause, a warrant, or permission to search your stuff. Never agree to it. Don’t stop them if they search anyway, but never, ever agree to a search. If the search is done improperly, your lawyer(see Lesson 2) will get the results of that searched thrown out.
It isn’t possible to get into more trouble for standing by your rights. There is no crime on the books anywhere in the US called “Refused Consent to Search”. Your day will not go worse because you defended your Constitutional rights.
I know a few defense attorneys. According to them, most of the people in jail either committed a crime in front of a bunch of witnesses, or they talked their way into jail. Shut up. You’ll want to either justify or defend yourself depending on the circumstances. Don’t. Shut up. It may be one of the hardest things you ever do, but keep your mouth closed. The only thing worse than talking is lying. Don’t lie, just keep quiet.
There is nothing you are going to say that will make your interrogator invite you home for Christmas. He isn’t your friend, you won’t meet his parents, you aren’t going to his birthday party. There is absolutely no win in talking to him. Shut up. The answer to every question is “Lawyer.” If the only thing you say babble is “Lawyerlawyerlawyerlawyerlawyerlawyer”, you’re probably not going to do too badly.
In your car, the dynamic changes a bit, but the principles don’t. When a cop pulls you over, don’t argue. You can’t win an argument with a cop on the side of the road. Be nice, be polite, and as soon as possible, pull into a parking lot and take as many notes about the encounter as you can. If you are planning to fight whatever he pulled you over for, don’t give him any reason to remember you or spin his official report to make you look bad. Again, shut up. Catching a theme?
If you are being investigated by the police, your future–or some part of it–is on the line. While you are gambling with your criminal record and your freedom, don’t forget that you are an amateur in this arena. The police, the prosecutor, and your attorney are the professionals and the stakes can be huge. Keep your mouth shut, call your attorney, and thank me later.
When you are up to your eyeballs in debt, praying for a step-stool, sometimes life–more accurately, con-artists–try to trip you when you are vulnerable and look for a solution. They aren’t muggers on the street. They come at you wearing ties, invite you to a real office, with real furniture and a real nameplate on a real desk. They are a real company, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t trying to scam you out of the little money you have left to put towards your debt.
Yes, I am talking about debt management scams. These scams come in 4 main varieties.
Debt Settlement companies instruct you to stop paying your bills completely and send them the money instead to be placed in a settlement fund. When your creditors get desperate enough, they will be willing to settle for pennies on the dollar.
In theory, this can be a good strategy for some debtors. Unfortunately, it has some drawbacks, even if the company is legitimate. They tend to charge high fees as a percentage of your deposits. Some take another fee when a settlement is accepted. The entire time you are building your settlement fund, your credit rating is sinking, leaving you open to being sued or garnished. The bad companies take the fund and run, while even the good companies can’t guarantee your creditors will play ball.
Ultimately, they aren’t doing anything you can’t easily do yourself. If you want to go the settlement route, stop making your payments and funnel the money into a savings account that you will use to offer settlements from. It takes discipline, but there is no upside to paying someone else for the same function.
Debt Management plans are used when you owe more than you can afford to pay. These companies work with your creditors to adjust interest rates and minimum payments and they try to get some fees waived for you.
A good company will work with you and your creditors to make sure everyone is working together towards the goal of eliminating the debt. A bad company will tell you they are working with your creditors while ignoring any contact from the creditor. They’ll tell you the creditor isn’t willing to negotiate while never stepping up to the negotiation table. Another trick is to offer the creditor a set payment, with a “take it or leave it” clause. Any input from the creditor is interpreted as a refusal to participate. This, coupled with high fees paid by the debtor, make debt management firms a risky proposition. Most states require the firms to be licensed. Check to make sure they are before giving them any information.
Debt/Credit Counseling companies work with you to establish a budget and eliminate expenses; in effect, they are training you to be in control of your finances. They are often organized as a nonprofit, but not always.
Some–the sleazy ones–lie about what they are doing, or attempt to misconstrue what you are agreeing too. Be careful not to use your home as collateral to consolidate unsecured debt and don’t walk into a Chapter 13 bankruptcy without that being your intention. Both of those are common debt counseling scams. If the company isn’t able to provide all of the details of a transaction–company name, address, licensing information–or they aren’t willing to spend as much time as necessary explaining the details of the transaction, walk away. This is your life, you are in charge of it. Don’t let anyone bully or prod you into signing something you aren’t comfortable with.
Credit Repair is almost always a scam. There are ways to get correct bad information removed from your credit report. If the information is correct, those methods are illegal. There are two legal methods to repair your credit. First, stop generating bad credit. Make your payments on time and eventually, the bad items will fall off. Second, write letters disputing the actual incorrect items on your credit report. There are no quick fixes, and anybody telling you different is flirting with a jail sentence, possibly yours.
How do you avoid the scammers?
There is no magic bullet to kill debt. You’re not fighting a werewolf, you’re fighting a lifetime of bad or unfortunate choices and circumstances. It’s important to keep a realistic outcome in mind.
Update: This post has been included in the Carnival of Debt Reduction.
Effective next week, we are officially a single-income family.
If you can count all of my side-hustles as “single income”.
This week, my wife did the paperwork for her final week of state-sponsored unemployment. She also applied for the federal extension, but that’s not automatic.
In a nutshell, this reduces our monthly income by $1340.
What does that mean for us?
1. Our truck, which I was hoping to have paid off by March(3 months ago), still has about 7 regular-sized payments left. Instead of making double payments, we’re now making the schedule amount. The reason for the payoff delay is another post entirely. Savings: $400. In a pinch, we could stop making payments for almost 3 years due to how much we’ve already paid.
2. The riding lessons I use to spoil my girls are cut in half. Instead of weekly lessons, we’re going bi-weekly. Savings: $100. In a pinch, this could go away completely.
3. We had a conversation that included, “Honey, when I complain that you bought more than our weekly budget of food in one trip, I’m not being a dick. Here’s how much money we have.” That conversation appears to have been productive.
4. No vacation this year. We let our spending jump a couple of times this year, so last week, I dropped most of our vacation fund to make up for it. The expense of being matron-of-honor at a wedding will be an upcoming post, too.
[Edit]
5. My wife is working at our daycare provider 2 days per week in exchange for daycare discounts. Financially, this isn’t perfect, but it cuts the cost and gets the girls out of the house. I work from home and have a hard time keeping them out of the office.
6. We are considering long-term stay-at-home status for my wife.
[End Edit]
Right now, our budget says we make $100 more than we spend. That includes all of our savings goals, and setting aside money for some luxuries like our Halloween party. We’re not hurting–which makes me happy–but we do have to watch our expenses in a way that has just become mandatory.
I can’t tell you how happy I am to have renters. Between our roommate here and the renters in the house we fixed up last year, we’re adding about $1000 to our income. Rent is keeping us cash-flow positive.
This post is part of the Yakezie Blog swap. I have swapped this week with Eric at Narrow Bridge Finance. This is a post from Eric discussing the theme: What Motivates You to be Financially Responsible? Please take a moment to read my post, Monsters, at Eric’s site.
Unlike my blogger buddy Jason here at LiveRealNow, I have no family. Quite the opposite in fact, I am loving the single guy life. I don’t have much debt. I love going to the bars and partying on the weekends. I have a good job. I have relatively low expenses. Things are good.
So what is my motivation to be financially responsible? It is two-fold. First, I want to be able to keep doing whatever I want whenever I want without worrying about money. Second, I do want to settle down someday in the not too distant future and make sure I have a good foundation to start the next chapter of my life.
I Want to Do Whatever I Want Whenever I Want
Is that selfish? Probably. But who cares? I don’t have kids, I don’t have a wife. I don’t even have a girlfriend at the moment. I do make an effort to donate to local organizations I believe in and I am happy to have friends over for a pre-game and buy a round of drinks, but that is as far as my obligation to others goes.
Doing whatever I want is not always cheap. I like going to concerts. I enjoy nightclubs. I love traveling and exploring new places. $80 tickets, a $15 cover plus drinks, and a $500 trip are fairly common occurrences in my life.
As you know, money doesn’t grow on trees. I have to work hard to pay for the things I want and the experiences I have. I am totally okay with that. But I have to plan now to be able to do what I want later.
I live in a modest and inexpensive apartment. I try to keep my food budget low. I bought a small car that would be reliable, low maintenance, and fuel efficient.
By cutting out wasteful spending and thinking before I spend, I am able to do pretty much whatever I want. If you have the same goal, dive into the depths of your budget. Dig in deep and see where you are spending money. Not to be cliché, but the ‘latte factor’ is a big deal. Those stops at Starbucks, afternoon snacks, energy drinks, cable bills, and other cash drains might not be worth it. If you don’t really, really enjoy it and get pleasure from it, why would you spend money on it?
My Future – Family, Travel, and Early Retirement
I am 26. I am at that point where I am going on a lot of dates. I am meeting a lot of great girls. One of these days, probably when I least expect it, I will fall madly in love and get married. You know the story.
My short term dream is a life of travel and urban living. My long term dream is to get married to a hot Jewish girl (I am Jewish, so it makes sense to “keep it in the tribe”) and have two or three kids. Once kids are in the picture, we move out from the urban fun areas and settle down in the burbs.
But just because I will give up the party life does not mean I have to give up my passions. I want to show my kids the world, give them amazing life experiences, and help them grow to hopefully be even more awesome than me, which is a hard bar to beat.
To do all of that and reach financial freedom, I have to set my goals and work to achieve them. (In case you were wondering, Jason recently wrote a great post on financial goal setting. If you have not read it yet, you really should.)
To get there, I am already working on saving and investing. I am contributing over 10% of my gross income at work to my retirement plans. I am working hard to pay down my student loans and save up a down payment fund. I am planning ahead and saving for my future goals.
How to Reach Your Goals
You probably have financial and life goals too. What are you doing to get there?
We can always tell people about our dreams. However, unlike when you are two years old and dream of being an astronaut police officer that lives in a toy store with an ice cream machine and a McDonald’s in it, your dreams today can be a reality.
With few exceptions, every person can reach their goals. Do you want to retire at 40? Take steps to save and create residual income streams. Do you want to travel in space? Save up to buy a ticket on Virgin Galactic. Do you not have enough money? Diversify your income streams and make more. Do you feel chained down by your traditional desk job that you hate? Start a business and transition to self employment.
Yes, it is easier said than done. But you will never reach your goals unless you take solid steps to get there. Don’t just dream it, live it.
Please take a moment to head over to Eric’s site, Narrow Bridge Finance. While you’re there, be sure to subscribe. You don’t want to miss his posts.
It’s been a month since I’ve written a post for the budget series, so I’ll be continuing that today. See these posts for the history of this series.
This time, I’ll be reviewing my non-monthly bills. These are the bills that have to be paid, but aren’t due on a monthly basis. Some are annual, some are quarterly.
Reviewing this list, there doesn’t seem to be too much I can cut and accomplish any meaningful savings. Am I missing something?