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Negotiating Superstar
Recently my son asked me for some money.
This isn’t rare.
He asks me for money on a regular basis. He’s kind of greedy some days.
This time, however, he asked what he can do to earn some money. Now, since I live in Minnesota and have the dog and we had the sixth snowiest winter ever this year, all my dogs little shoe-bombs have been buried for the last six months. It started snowing in early November and as of this writing, on March 25, I still see two inches of snow covering every thing. Last week, we had a thaw and got to see the grass. We also got to see the dog’s business all over the yard.
I told him that I would give him $10 to clean up the yard. He asked if a friend could help. I said yes. Then he asked if they would have to split the money or if I would be paying them $10 each. I said that I’d be getting the same amount of work done, so they should split the $10.
He didn’t like the plan, so he negotiated his way up to getting seven dollars each. Originally, I was planning to pay $20, but got talked down by a friend. I’d still be willing to pay $20. What I’m trying to do is encourage him to start negotiating. I am a lousy negotiator. I want my kids to have better financial skills than I do. I want them to grow up knowing how to negotiate and being comfortable negotiating. That will make him a better financial adult.
So I encourage him. Sometimes I offer a lowball number and if he gets so upset walks away I ask him why he didn’t give a counter-offer. If he just accepts a number that’s way too low, or if his grandma offers him a shiny nickel to mow her yard, I tell him no. I tell him to reject it and offer something that he feels is more in line with what he would actually be doing.
Now, if I’m going to keep up these lessons I need to work on my negotiating skills too, so this is also a self-improvement game.
How do you teach a kid to negotiate? What resources are out there to teach yourself?
The Evils of a Reverse Mortgage
Picture it: Sicily, 1922.
Sorry, wrong channel. Let’s try again.
Picture it: 20, 30, 50 years from now. You’re old. The money you’ve been failing to save so you could stock up on Fritos and obsolete video game consoles(to survive the zombie apocalypse in style) would come in handy about now, since the end of the world never happened. Note to self: Never trust an ancient Mayan.
You’re 70, with no savings and no income aside from the Social Security check that hasn’t been adjusted for inflation since the Palin(Bristol) administration.
But you own your house and that nice young man down at Yersk Rude Bank recommended a reverse mortgage. That could give you all of the money you need to live a comfortable retirement and pay for a bit of a funeral.
Right?
Nazzofast.
Of all of the possible social security strategies, this is one of the worst.
What is a reverse mortgage?
In a traditional mortgage, you’re given a chunk of money guaranteed by your home. You have to pay that money back over time, or you’ll lose your house. In a reverse mortgage, you’re still converting your home’s equity into cash, but you don’t have to pay it back until you die or move, including moving into a nursing home. You are effectively abandoning future-house in exchange for now-money.
Who qualifies for a reverse mortgage?
If you are 62 or older, and live in a home you own, you qualify. Credit and income are not considered.
Why would you want a reverse mortgage?
If money is tight and you have no prospects, a reverse mortgage may be a valid consideration. A better consideration would be to take out a traditional loan and make monthly payments out of that lump sum, or sell your house outright and move someplace more affordable.
What are the downsides of a reverse mortgage?
You lose your house. Technically, your heirs lose your house. A reverse mortgage becomes due when you die. If your heirs can’t cover the loan, the house will be foreclosed. Also, this is a loan. It accumulates interest, even if you aren’t paying it back. If you borrow $200,000 and die in 10 years, your estate may owe $400,000 on the reverse mortgage. If this is a treasured family home, losing it could come as a shocking blow at a time when your family would already be reeling from the loss of, well, you.
What if you really don’t like your heirs?
I’d still recommend getting a traditional mortgage. You can throw a killer party and then, you’ll rebuild equity over time. That way, if you live longer than you expect, you can refinance and throw another killer party. If you go this route, don’t invite the kids, but be sure to hire a videographer so they can see how you’re spending their inheritance.
I’m not a banker or a financial advisor, but I’d recommend against a reverse mortgage in almost all circumstances.
How about you? Would you get one, or recommend one? What’s your preferred method to hurt your ungrateful heirs?
The Unfrugal Meal
I spend a lot of time talking about how to save money here. It’s kind of what I do.
Not today.
Today, I’m going to talk about the best way I’ve wasted money during my vacation this week.
First, so my feelings are completely understood: A vacation is about experiences and memories. I could spend all day at the park with my kids, or I could spend a memorable meal with them. Which will they remember longer?
It ain’t the park. They are there almost every day.
Of course, if the restaurant is McDonald’s they wouldn’t remember for long, either.
Tuesday, after a long day of hands-on, interactive museum-going, we took the kids to a Japanese steakhouse. Teppanyaki, where they cook the food at the table, complete with fire, spatula spinning, and airborne food.
I’m the only one in my family who has seen that before. Honestly, watching the art, the skill, the banter, and the giant fireball leaves me as wide-eyed as my kids.
They loved it.
Watching the chef throw a bowl full of rice across the table made my son’s jaw drop.
Seeing the chef carry fire from one side of the grill to the other on his fingers made my youngest squeal and beg for more fire tricks.
Getting squirted by the chef when he was putting out a flare-up made the middle brat giggle, possibly because the squirt gun was a little kid, dressed up as a fireman, with his pants down. She got “peed” on and loved it.
Aside from cooking-as-a-show, the service was fantastic. There was always a waiter nearby to keep our water glasses full or to provide “little kid” chopsticks, which are modified with rubber band to remove the need for skill to eat. They had the courses perfectly timed. The minute the salad was cleared, the soup was delivered. When that was done, the chef rolled up to start on the rice. My two-year-old was eating white rice without complaint for the first time.
Giggles and squeals. Three days later, they are still talking about it. My 11-year-old, who’s trying so hard to be an unimpressible teenager, says it was the coolest restaurant he’s ever seen.
Frugal, it wasn’t, but the memories were worth the money.
Time vs Money
In this corner, weighing in at the only thing you have in this life that you can’t possibly get more of: Time!
And in this corner, weighing in at the thing people think they need to be happy: Money!
Keep it clean. No biting, scratching or hitting your opponents with a chair unless my back is turned. Fight!
Yesterday was Jimmy John’s customer appreciation day. They had subs for $1, but you had to go there in person to get it. At noon, there were more than 50 people standing in line. If it takes 1 minute to make a sandwich, that’s almost an hour in line. To save $5.
Good for Jimmy John’s. They brought thousands of extra people into the restaurant and had a huge line running down the sidewalk. That makes them look great to everyone driving by.
But, the people? Really? Would you work, at any job, for anyone(excluding charitable work) for $5 per hour?
Round 1: Time!
My mother-in-law regularly drive 6 miles out of her way to save 5 cent per gallon on gas. If usually takes 10-15 minutes to get there, if the stoplights behave and traffic is decent. If she arrive with her gas gauge on “E”, she gets to put 15 gallons of gas in her car, for a savings of 75 cents. That’s an effective rate of $2.25 per hour, not counting the gas used to drive there. However, if I ask her to give her $2 to stand in her driveway doing nothing for an hour, she looks at me like I’m nuts!
Round 2: Time!
My wife will occasionally make a shopping list that includes coupons and items spanning three grocery stores. If that were to happen, there would be an extra hour wasted, just traveling between the stores, minimum. Then another hour wasted walking past the items in the first store that were slated to be purchased at the second, or third store. Add another 15 minutes per store to check out, and we’re looking at 2 and a half hours down the tubes to save a possible $20?
No freaking way.
Round 3: Time!
My time is valuable. No matter what I do, or how hard I work, I can never get more than my allotment. Why would I waste it to save a fraction of what I can earn by using it in other ways?
And the winner is….Time!
What’s the craziest thing you’ve done to save a few bucks?
Why I Hate Payday Loans
I hate payday loans and payday lenders.
The way a way a payday loan works is that you go into a payday lender and you sign a check for the amount you want to borrow, plus their fee. They give you money that you don’t have to pay back until payday. It’s generally a two-week loan.
Now, this two week loan comes with a fee, so if you want to borrow $100, they’ll charge you a $25 fee, plus a percent of the total loan, so for that $100 loan, you’ll have to pay back $128.28.
That’s only 28% of actual interest; that’s not terrible. However, if you prorate that to figure the APR, which is what everyone means when they say “I’ve got a 7% interest rate”, it comes out to 737%. That’s nuts.
They are a very bad financial plan.
Those loans may save you from an overdraft fee, but they’ll cost almost as much as an overdraft fee, and the way they are rigged–with high fees, due on payday–you’re more likely to need another one soon. They are structured to keep you from ever getting out from under the payday loan cycle.
For those reasons, I consider payday loan companies to be slimy. Look at any of their sites. Almost none are upfront about the total cost of the loan.
So I don’t take their ads. When an advertiser contacts me, my rate sheet says very clealy that I will not take payday loan ads. The reason for that is–in my mind–when I accept an advertiser, I am–in some form–endorsing that company, or at least, I am agreeing that they are a legitimate business and I am helping them conduct that business.
In all of the time I’ve been taking ads, I’ve made exactly one exception to that rule. On the front page of that advertiser’s website, they had the prorated APR in bright, bold red letters. It was still a really bad deal, but with that level of disclosure, I felt comfortable that nobody would click through and sign up without knowing what they were getting into. That was a payday lender with integrity, as oxymoronic as that sounds.