Search Results for “three-alternatives-to-a-budget/budget-lesson-part-3/slow-carb-diet-how-to-avoid-going-bat-crazy/budget-lesson-part-2/brown-bagging-your-way-to-savings/budget-lesson-part-5/travel-expenses-why-i-splurge/what-happens-when-you-save/first-3-things-to-do-in-the-new-year/money-problems-day-3-whats-coming-in/debt-burnout” — Page 15

Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.

Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?

Me: Yes?

FMe: <Slap!>

Me: May I ask what that was for?

FMe: Of course.

Me: What was that for, jerk?

FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.

Me: What?!? I’ve never even met you, before.

FMe: Of course you have. I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.

Me: Huh?

FMe: Listen close. You’re not the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.

Me: ???

FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.

Me: I don’t appreciate….

FMe: Shut up. I was dumb then, too. Remember? You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year. On top of many other expensive decisions. Do your recall?

Me: Yes, I do. So what?

FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car. Your kids wear new clothes. You’ve got a house full of new furniture. How did you pay for all of that?

Me: Naturally, I charged it. Zero payments, zero interest for a year! Pretty smart, huh?

FMe: What happens in a year?

Me: I don’t know. I’ve got a full year to figure that out.

FMe: <Slap!> I’ll tell you what happens! Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed! Your raise didn’t come through. You had a baby. The truck broke down. Your wife took maternity leave. A roommate moved out. You took a loss in the stock market. You didn’t plan! You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.

Me: How was I to know?

FMe: <Slap!> Life happens! You never know what is coming next. You need to plan and save for what might happen. Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly. That is not acceptable.

Me: So? What are you going to do about it?

FMe: <Slap!>

Me: Really? Again?

FMe: <Slap!> I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help. Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux. My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford. You’ve screwed me, dude.

Me: I’m sorry. What can I do to fix it?

FMe: Buy me dinner, first.

Me: Huh?!?!?

FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change. No credit.

Me: None?

FMe: None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Only spend what you can afford. Budget. Pay off those nasty bills. Don’t leave me hanging.

Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?

FMe: Exactly. That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence. Live in the real world.

Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me! Now I know.

FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

Fall From Grace

Finance

When you accumulate a certain level of debt, it feels like you’re wading through an eyeball-deep pool of poo, dancing on your tiptoes just to keep breathing. Ask me how I really feel.

It shouldn’t be a surprise that I’m in debt. We have gone over this before. The story isn’t one of my proudest, so I’ve never talked much about how it happened.

Our debt was entirely our fault. We messed up and dug our own poo-pool. There were no major medical bills, no extended unemployment, just a strong consumer urge and an apparent need for instant gratification. Delayed gratification wasn’t a skill I’d considered learning. The idea of it was a thoroughly foreign concept. Why wait when every store we visited offered no payments/no interest for a year? We didn’t give much thought to what would happen when the year was up.

We got married young. We bought our house young. We started our family young. We did all of that over the course of two years, well before we were financially ready. Twenty years old, we had excellent credit and gave our credit reports a workout. Credit was so easy to get. By the time I was 22, we had a total credit limit more than twice our annual income. We fought so hard to keep up with the Joneses. A new pickup, a remodel on our house. Within a month of paying off the truck, I got a significant raise and rushed out to buy a new car.

Every penny that hit the table was caught in a net of lifestyle expansion. I was bouncing on my tiptoes.

Four months into my new car payment, I was laid off. There’s me, hoping for a snorkel. A week later, we found out our son was going to be a big brother. Our pool had developed a tide.

We killed the cable and cut back on everything else and…managed. Money was tight, but we got by. I got a new job, but had we learned any lessons? Of course not. We got a satellite dish, started shopping the way we always had. Times were good, and could never be bad. We had such short memories.

Fast forward a couple of years. Baby #3 is on the way while baby #2 is still in diapers. Daycare was about to double. Daddy started to panic. I built a rudimentary budget and realized there was no way to make ends meet. There just wasn’t enough cash coming in to cover expenses. That’s when I made my first frugal decision: I quit smoking. That cut the expenses right to the level of our income. It was tight, but doable.

There was still one serious problem. Neither one of us could control our impulse shopping. For a time, I was getting packages delivered almost every day. It was never anything expensive, but it was always something. Little things add up quickly.

Last spring, I realized we couldn’t keep going like that. I started looking into bankruptcy. Somehow, we managed to toss ourselves into the deep end of the pool. We had near-perfect credit and no way to maintain it.

While researching bankruptcy, I found our life preserver. We put together a budget. We cut and…it hurt. It’s taken a year, but every bill we have is finally being tracked. We have an emergency fund and we are working towards our savings goals. It hasn’t been an easy year, but we are making progress. We’ve eliminated 15% of our debt and opened out budget to include some “blow money” and an occasional date night. We are always looking for ways to decrease our bottom line and increase the top line. Most important, we are actually working together to keep all of our expenses under control, with no hurt feelings when we remind ourselves to stay on track.

We are finally standing flat-footed, head and shoulders above the poo.

Update: This post has been included in the Carnival of Personal Finance.

Debt Scams

Finance

When you are up to your eyeballs in debt, praying for a step-stool, sometimes life–more accurately, con-artists–try to trip you when you are vulnerable and look for a solution. They aren’t muggers on the street. They come at you wearing ties, invite you to a real office, with real furniture and a real nameplate on a real desk. They are a real company, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t trying to scam you out of the little money you have left to put towards your debt.

Yes, I am talking about debt management scams. These scams come in 4 main varieties.

Debt Settlement companies instruct you to stop paying your bills completely and send them the money instead to be placed in a settlement fund. When your creditors get desperate enough, they will be willing to settle for pennies on the dollar.

In theory, this can be a good strategy for some debtors. Unfortunately, it has some drawbacks, even if the company is legitimate. They tend to charge high fees as a percentage of your deposits. Some take another fee when a settlement is accepted. The entire time you are building your settlement fund, your credit rating is sinking, leaving you open to being sued or garnished. The bad companies take the fund and run, while even the good companies can’t guarantee your creditors will play ball.

Ultimately, they aren’t doing anything you can’t easily do yourself. If you want to go the settlement route, stop making your payments and funnel the money into a savings account that you will use to offer settlements from. It takes discipline, but there is no upside to paying someone else for the same function.

Debt Management plans are used when you owe more than you can afford to pay. These companies work with your creditors to adjust interest rates and minimum payments and they try to get some fees waived for you.

A good company will work with you and your creditors to make sure everyone is working together towards the goal of eliminating the debt. A bad company will tell you they are working with your creditors while ignoring any contact from the creditor. They’ll tell you the creditor isn’t willing to negotiate while never stepping up to the negotiation table. Another trick is to offer the creditor a set payment, with a “take it or leave it” clause. Any input from the creditor is interpreted as a refusal to participate. This, coupled with high fees paid by the debtor, make debt management firms a risky proposition. Most states require the firms to be licensed. Check to make sure they are before giving them any information.

Debt/Credit Counseling companies work with you to establish a budget and eliminate expenses; in effect, they are training you to be in control of your finances. They are often organized as a nonprofit, but not always.

Some–the sleazy ones–lie about what they are doing, or attempt to misconstrue what you are agreeing too. Be careful not to use your home as collateral to consolidate unsecured debt and don’t walk into a Chapter 13 bankruptcy without that being your intention. Both of those are common debt counseling scams. If the company isn’t able to provide all of the details of a transaction–company name, address, licensing information–or they aren’t willing to spend as much time as necessary explaining the details of the transaction, walk away. This is your life, you are in charge of it. Don’t let anyone bully or prod you into signing something you aren’t comfortable with.

Credit Repair is almost always a scam. There are ways to get correct bad information removed from your credit report. If the information is correct, those methods are illegal. There are two legal methods to repair your credit. First, stop generating bad credit. Make your payments on time and eventually, the bad items will fall off. Second, write letters disputing the actual incorrect items on your credit report. There are no quick fixes, and anybody telling you different is flirting with a jail sentence, possibly yours.

How do you avoid the scammers?

Be skeptical. If it looks to good to be true, it probably is. There is no such thing as a magic wand to fix your credit and make your debt disappear. Bankruptcy + 10 years of your life is the closest thing to magic credit repair in this world.
Only use a legitimate credit counselor. Verify them through the Better Business Bureau and the National Foundation for Credit Counseling (1-800-388-2227 or www.nfcc.org)
Check the license. Most states require credit and debt counselors to be licensed. If they’re not, run away and report them.
Read the find print. Don’t sign anything you don’t understand. Like every other piece of your financial life, own the transaction. Know what your are doing, or don’t do it.
Are they willing to work with you? If they’ve got a generic plan that doesn’t account for your specific situation, they are probably a con. At the very least, they are a worthless company and a waste of both time and money.
Are they willing to work with your creditors? If not, they won’t be accomplishing anything for you.
How much do they cost? Higher fees may not be an indicator of a scam, but call around and find out if they are in the right ballpark. Triple or quadruple the going rate is a sign of someone who will disappear late one night, with your hopes, dreams and savings in tow.
Above all else, trust your gut. If it doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. There is nothing a counselor can do that can’t wait a few days while you check them out.

There is no magic bullet to kill debt. You’re not fighting a werewolf, you’re fighting a lifetime of bad or unfortunate choices and circumstances. It’s important to keep a realistic outcome in mind.

Update: This post has been included in the Carnival of Debt Reduction.

Multiracial Skinhead Love Triangle

Finance, Life

“Honey, here on national television, in front of a live studio audience, I’ve got a secret I’d like to share. You’re not our child’s mother. I’ve been sleeping with the milkman. And the goat. Your mom is the star of my new adult website. With the goat. And the milkman. I’ve got three other families, in three other cities. I lost the house to my gambling addiction. Those sores? Herpesyphiligonoritis. I got it from the foreign exchange student we hosted before I moved her to Dubuque and married her. The goat gave her away. The milkman cried. Oh, and I wore your panties to the Illinois Nazi reunion. I know how much you hate Illinois Nazis. But I still love you. And your sister. Especially your sister. She does that thing with her tongue….”

Why would anyone go on national television to share things like that?

More interesting: why would anybody stay on stage after hearing that?

Stay tuned.

I have this friend. He bought a couple of cars. He’s got some issues with money, partially revolving around a need to keep his assets below a certain threshold. So he put the cars in his girlfriend’s name. I know, it’s slightly crooked, but that makes the story more fun.

They broke up.

Recently, she called him to say she was suing him for the cars. She wanted them. She wanted to hurt him. She was mean. Somehow that turned into them agreeing to settle the case on Judge Joe Brown, on national television.

My friend spoke with the show’s producer, then last week, he was flown to California and put up in a hotel for a couple of days. When he arrived at the TV studio, he was informed that it wasn’t Judge Joe Brown, but a new show that will start airing in the fall called, The Test. According to CBS, The Test “is a one-hour conflict resolution talk show that will use lie detector and DNA tests to settle relationship and paternity disputes among the guests.” Coincidentally, CBS also owns Judge Joe Brown.

My friend got on stage with Dr. Phil’s son, Jay McGraw, and was accused of cheating on his girlfriend and stealing her identity. Lie detectors. Yelling. Accusations.

Why did he stay?

He wasn’t given his return plane ticket until they were done filming.

When he was done, they handed him a voucher for cab fare and the itinerary for his return flight. Until then, he had no other way to get home.

That’s why people stay on stage. It’s probably also why none of those shows ever have people with money of their own; they can find their own way home in a pinch.

Interesting side note: The show paid $200 and booked the cheapest possible return flight, with a 6 hour layover.

Money Problems: Day 12 – Paying for College by Doing Without

Finance

Today, I am continuing the series, Money Problems: 30 Days to Perfect Finances. The series will consist of 30 things you can do in one setting to perfect your finances. It’s not a system to magically make your debt disappear. Instead, it is a path to understanding where you are, where you want to be, and–most importantly–how to bridge the gap.

I’m not running the series in 30 consecutive days. That’s not my schedule. Also, I think that talking about the same thing for 30 days straight will bore both of us. Instead, it will run roughly once a week. To make sure you don’t miss a post, please take a moment to subscribe, either by email or rss.

On this, Day 11, we’re going to talk about one method of paying for college.

I have a secret to share. Are you listening? Lean in close: College is expensive.

You’re shocked, I can tell.

The fact is, college prices are rising entirely out of proportion to operation costs, salaries, or inflation. The only thing college prices seem to be pegged to is demand. Demand has gotten thoroughly out of whack. The government forces down the interest rates on student loans, then adds some ridiculous forgiveness as long as you make payments for some arbitrary number of years, creating an artificial demand that wouldn’t be there if the iron fist of government weren’t forcing it into place.

Somebody in Washington has decided that the American dream consists of home ownership and a college education. Everything is a failure. He’s an idiot.

College isn’t for everybody.

Read that again. Not everyone should go to college. Not everyone can thrive in college.

Fewer than half of students who start college graduate. The greater-than-half who drop out still have to repay their loans. Do you think college was a good choice for them?

Then you get the people who major in art history and minor in philosophy. Do you know what that degree qualifies you for? Burger flipping.

Yes, I know. Just having a degree qualifies you for a number of jobs. It’s not because the degree matters, it’s because HR departments set a series of fairly arbitrary requirements just to filter a 6 foot stack of resumes. The only thing they care about is that having a degree proves that you were able to stick college out for 4 years. That HR requirement matters less as time goes on and you develop relevant work experience.

A liberal arts education also—properly done—trains your mind in the skill of learning. First, not everyone is capable of learning new things. Second, not everyone is willing to learn new things. Third, a passion for learning can be fed without college. If you don’t have that passion, college won’t create it. Most of the most learned people throughout history managed without college, or even formal education. Even if you want to feed that passion in a formal classroom, you’re assuming the professors are interested in training your mind instead of indoctrinating it with their views.

Now there are some pursuits that outright require a college education. The sciences like engineering, physics, astronomy, and psychiatry all require college. You know what doesn’t require college? Managing a cube farm. Data entry. Sales. I’m not saying those are bad professions, but they can certainly be done without dropping $50,000 on college.

Some careers require an education, but don’t require a 4 year degree, like nursing(in most states), computer programming(it’s not required, but it makes it a lot easier to break into) and others. Do you need to hit a 4 year school and get a Bachelor’s degree, or can you hold yourself to a 2 year program at a technical college and save yourself 40,000 or more?

That should be an easy choice. Don’t go to college just because you think you should or because somebody said you should, or to get really drunk. College isn’t for everybody and it’s possible it’s not for you.

How to Live Happily Without a Budget

Finance

Three years ago, we sat down and built our budget. We spent 9 months adding the non-monthly bills that we forgot about when we created the budget. Setbacks and shortfalls almost killed the budgeting plan completely. It took almost an entire year to get our budget right.

Unrelated Image

Now? I refer to the budget once per month. No more. I don’t check it at bill-paying time. I don’t think about it daily. It’s there as a reference when I need it, but it no longer drives our finances. How did we get to that point?

First, we firmly established our budget. We know exactly what we need to cover our expenses. None of the predictable bills catch us by surprise any more. This is important.

Once we had the budget established, the rest was easy. I moved almost every bill to US Bank’s online bill-pay system and switched to electronic billing and automatic payments. The automatic payments are all through US Bank. I only allow my mortgage to be set up with the merchant. I want total, instant control over the rest. I won’t call a merchant to ask them to change a payment if something comes up. The bank sends me an email when a payment is automatically scheduled, and again when it is paid.

Once I got comfortable with the automatic payments, I switched to electronic billing. I don’t need to see the bill or waste the paper if I know it is being handled for me which is why I encourage you to manage all your finances online. I do check the few bills that may change, like the credit card and cell phone. Now, I see few of my bills. They are all sent electronically to my bank, automatically paid, and scheduled in Quicken–all without intervention from me.

[ad name=”inlineleft”]We also use an envelope system. I know how much we need for groceries, baby crap, clothes, etc. At the beginning of the month, I take out all of that money in cash and put it into the appropriate envelopes. Other than this money, almost everything else takes care of itself. I don’t need to pay attention to by bills on a day-t0-day basis. Any extra money that comes in gets divided among our debt repayment and savings goals, which only takes a few minutes to arrange.

I glance over my budget at the beginning of every month, but I only review it when something changes. If we change our cell phone, or our budgeted gas bill changes, I make the change to our budget. Other than that, it’s not even an afterthought.

That’s how we do it.

Another option includes the Sloppy Math System. This consists simply of rounding deposits down and rounding expenses up. The more you round, the better the system works. If you round every deposit down $50, and round every expense up to the next $10, you are naturally building more room for error. Given enough time, you will have enough of a slush fund to handle emergencies and the occasional impulse purchase.