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The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.

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Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.
Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?
Me: Yes?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: May I ask what that was for?
FMe: Of course.
Me: What was that for, jerk?
FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.
Me: What?!?  I’ve never even met you, before.
FMe: Of course you have.  I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.
Me: Huh?
FMe: Listen close.  You’re not  the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.
Me: ???
FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.
Me: I don’t appreciate….
FMe: Shut up.  I was dumb then, too.  Remember?  You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year.  On top of many other expensive decisions.  Do your recall?
Me: Yes, I do.  So what?
FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car.  Your kids wear new clothes.  You’ve got a house full of new furniture.  How did you pay for all of that?
Me: Naturally, I charged it.  Zero payments, zero interest for a year!  Pretty smart, huh?
FMe: What happens in a year?
Me: I don’t know.  I’ve got a full year to figure that out.
FMe: <Slap!>  I’ll tell you what happens!  Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed!   Your raise didn’t come through.  You had a baby. The truck broke down.  Your wife took maternity leave.  A roommate moved out.  You took a loss in the stock market.  You didn’t plan!  You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.
Me: How was I to know?
FMe: <Slap!>  Life happens!  You never know what is coming next.  You need to plan and save for what might happen.  Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly.  That is not acceptable.
Me:  So?  What are you going to do about it?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: Really?  Again?
FMe: <Slap!>  I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help.  Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux.  My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford.   You’ve screwed me, dude.
Me: I’m sorry.  What can I do to fix it?
FMe: Buy me dinner, first.
Me: Huh?!?!?
FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change.  No credit.
Me: None?
FMe: None.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.  Only spend what you can afford. Budget.  Pay off those nasty bills.  Don’t leave me hanging.
Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?
FMe: Exactly.  That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence.  Live in the real world.
Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me!  Now I know.
FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

 

Delayed Gratification

Finance, Parenting

I work daily to raise my kids to be more financially responsible than I have been.  One of the most difficult pieces has been to explain the benefits of delayed gratification to my children. It’s hard enough, as an adult, to take delayed gratification to heart.  For a child?   It seems to be almost impossible.

My son wants an XBox 360 Elite.   Good for him.  He wants to renegotiate the terms of his allowance to get it faster.  Currently, every other time he gets an allowance paid out, it goes into his bank account, to be mostly untouched.  The other times he can do as he pleases with his money.   We are enforcing a 50% long term savings plan. Now, with a medium-term goal in mind, he wants to keep all of his money, and only put gift money into the bank account.

Should we let him tap his bank account for a shiny new bauble?  It’s been building for a while, so it’s delayed, right?   I don’t think that would accomplish much. Like any other 10-year-old, his interests change often.

Should we let him change the terms of our agreement, speeding a medium-term goal at the expense of his long-term savings?  My wife and I haven’t had a chance to discuss this, but my initial reaction is not to allow it.   His savings has the potential to turn into a decent car in a few years, if he wants.  That would be a car he knows he earned.

Last week, when we were at the store, he asked if he could borrow some money to buy a game.   I don’t expect him to carry his money around everywhere, so I would have allowed it, if he would have had the money at home.   He didn’t.   His plan was to pay me what he did have as soon as we got home, then work his butt off for a few days to earn enough extra to pay it back.   I won’t be a credit agency for my kids, so I said no.  He was disappointed, but, by the time he had earned the money, he no longer wanted the game.   I consider that a win, but I don’t know that he learned any lesson other than “Dad’s a jerk.”

Someday, when his life launch is smooth due to a lack of debt-dependence, he’ll look back on these lessons and smile.

I hope.

Festival of Frugality #287: The Independence Day Edition

Misc


Independence Day
Independence Day

Today, it is my please to host the 287th Festival of Frugality, the Independence Day Edition.   Yesterday, was Independence Day in the US.  It’s the day we celebrate throwing off the yolk of high-tax, no-rights tyranny and blowing stuff up.

That’s not what this Festival is about.  As much as I love this country and enjoyed celebrating, today, the theme is the Independence Day movie.

Coolest ID4 fact, ever:  A promotional piece that aired in Spain for this film set off a “War of the Worlds” type of wide spread panic. The promo featured a popular Spanish news anchor and the piece ran as if there really WAS an alien attack to occur on July 4.

Editor’s Picks

The explosion of the Welcome Wagon Helicopters was actually footage of a pyrotechnics accident on set.

Miss T. gives us Seven Reasons to Avoid Penny Auction Sites.  She does a great job of explaining the evil that is Penny Auctions, from outright fraud to the rip-off that is the basic business model.  Some of these sites make $5000 or more on an iPad auction.  They don’t even have to carry an inventory before running an auction.

Independence Day holds the record for most miniature model-work.   It beat the previous record by double.

Philip submits Turn Wasted Extra Money Into a Debt Payment.  I have a friend who is positive he can’t reduce his monthly expenses at all, while eating out almost every day.

The alien ship “miniature” was 65 feet across.

Boomer presents Financial Support For Your Adult Children.  I love my parents.  A lot.  I couldn’t imagine moving back in with them, and I’m pretty sure they’d feel the same way soon enough.   Although, Mom, if you’re reading this, can I have an allowance again?

This was the highest grossing film in 1996.

Suba presents Why you should not use 401k.  I’ve never questioned the wisdom of maxing out a 401k.   It’s good to see those assumptions challenged and the numbers crunched.

The Best of the Rest

President Whitmore: Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. Mankind, that word should have new meaning to all of us. We cannot be consumed by our petty differences anymore. Perhaps it is fate that today is the fourth of July, and we will once again be fighting for our freedom. But not for freedom from tyrrany or oppression or persecution. We’re fighting for our right to live, to exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day when the world stood up and declared in one voice that we will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!

FMF presents Save Money on Groceries by Shopping on Wednesday posted at Free Money Finance.

Harri Pierce presents Have a second hand summer posted at TotallyMoney.

Daniel presents Top 10 Reasons to Shop Online vs. Shopping In-Store posted at Sweating The Big Stuff.

President Whitmore: It’s a fine line between standing behind a principle and hiding behind one.

Philip Taylor presents The Best Time to Buy posted at PT Money Personal Finance.

Outlaw presents Pay Yourself First and Have Money in the Bank posted at Outlaw Finance.

Crystal presents Frugal Tips for the Pet Dog posted at Budgeting in the Fun Stuff.

Matt presents The Price of Water posted at Stupid Cents.

That’s right! That’s what you get! Look at you! Ship all banged up! Who’s the man? Who’s the man?! Wait until I get another plane! I am going to line up all your friends right beside you! ~ Captain Steven Hiller

Alan presents The Cost of Online Gaming: Free to Play posted at Canadian Finance Blog.

Paula @ AffordAnything.org presents Diets and Debt: Managing Money and Your Weight posted at AffordAnything.org.

Kay Lynn presents Summer Fun for the Frugal Family posted at Bucksome Boomer.

Jacob @ My Personal Finance Journey presents Top 10 Money Saving Tips posted at My Personal Finance Journey.

If you’re so smart, tell me something, how come you go to M.I.T. for 8 years to become a cable repairman?~ Julius Levinson

Glen Craig presents The Cost of Clutter on Your Finances and Life posted at Free From Broke.

Eddie presents 55 Suggestions To Save $1000 posted at Finance Fox.

Darwin presents Are You Better Off Than Your Parents? posted at Darwin’s Money.

Sustainable PF presents Sustainability Tip #179: Loose Cap Lose Gas posted at Sustainable Personal Finance.

WHOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Elvis has left the building! ~ Captain Steven Hiller

I hope you enjoyed the carnival.  Please take a moment to subscribe to Live Real, Now.

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How to Save Money On Anything

Finance

Haggling
Haggling (Photo credit: pritzkerphoto.com)

There is a little-known secret to saving money on almost anything.  If you want to know what it is, please send a case of beer and a self-addressed, stamped envelope to my house.

No takers?

In that case, I will share the secret that has been passed down from father to son since the Mesopotamians landed the Santa Maria at Plymouth Rock.

Ready?

The secret is to…ask.

That’s right, just suck it up and say “Pretty Please”.

How does it work?

In the easiest version, you call up one of the companies you pay regularly and you say “How can I save some money?”

Allow me to give you some examples.

How to save money on insurance

Call up your insurance company and ask, “How can I save some money with you?”  You may be offered a multi-line discount if you let them insure your home and your car or you might be told to raise your deductible.  If you have a $1000 emergency fund, you can afford a $500 deductible.   They may recommend that you drop some coverages that you don’t need or they may ask you some questions that will allow them to lower your rate.  For many years, I lived 2 miles from work and got a discount for the low mileage.

How to save money on utilities

When you call your electric company to ask the magic question, they may offer to conduct a home energy audit to determine where you home is leaking energy.  If they try to charge you for the audit, remind them how long you’ve been a customer in good standing.

Another option they may offer is to install a remotely-triggered switch on your air-conditioner.  Around here, that switch is good for a 15% discount off of my bill in the summer.

How to save money on your cell phone

If you are out of a contract or near the end of your contract you have leverage.  Look up the best comparable deal from another company.  Then, call your cell phone provider, ask to be transferred to the retention department, then ask them to convince you to stay.  They will.

If you aren’t near the end of your contract, you can still call and ask.  If that doesn’t work, watch the mail and any emails from the company.  If they change the terms of your contract, you can get out of it without paying a penalty.  If you get that opportunity, call and ask for the retention department.

How to save money on credit cards

I am assuming you have a credit card with a balance that gets carried from month to month.

Credit card companies are competitive.  Find a competing deal and call your company.  Ask them to beat the deal.  If the competitor is offering 9%, ask for 8%.  If they refuse, call up the competitor.  Tell them you will transfer your balance over if they will waive the transfer fee.    A surprising number of companies will be happy to do so.

Most bills can be reduced in some way.  All you have to do is ask.

Have you had any luck pointing the shrink ray at your bills?

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Saturday Roundup – Happy New Year!

Misc

This week, my daycare provider has taken off to have surgery.   That means I have 10 days off in a row.  I haven’t done that since I was laid off at my last job, four years ago.  I’m really looking forward to the time with my brats.

Happy New Year!  Here’s hoping 2011 beats the pants off of 2010, no matter how 2010 went for you.

Best Posts

Free From Broke has a monster post with the best personal finance articles of the year.  If you need something to read….

Lifehacker posted about a service that will grade and critique your resume for free.  I’m not looking for a new job, but it looks like a great service.

Have you ever considered the similarities between hookers, doctors, and TSA agents?

Here’s an interesting analysis of the huge stimulus package that was supposed to revive the economy.  With all of the red tape and deadlines involved in getting the stimulus money, only projects that were going to happen anyway and already had permits and approval actually happened.   Private enterprise held off starting projects, hoping to get stimulus funding, only to find out they couldn’t possibly jump through the hoops in time, which is when they lost investors.   Huge fail with nothing accomplished beyond packing a ton of taxpayer money in a fat .gov bong and watching it go up in smoke.

LRN Timewarp

This is where I review the posts I wrote a year ago.

I wrote a post on the dangers of hypocrisy.   It’s a good post to re-read whenever I start feeling judgmental.

I also started my budget series.   Lesson 1 detailed my discretionary budget category.

Finally, I asked what you’ve done to improve your situation.  Every day, you can do something.  It may not be a big thing, but even small steps in the right direction will get you where you need to be.

Get More Out of Live Real, Now

There are so many ways you can read and interact with this site.

You can subscribe by RSS and get the posts in your favorite news reader.  I prefer Google Reader.

You can subscribe by email and get, not only the posts delivered to your inbox, but occasional giveaways and tidbits not available elsewhere.

You can ‘Like’ LRN on Facebook.   Facebook gets more use than Google.  It can’t hurt to see what you want where you want.

You can follow LRN on Twitter.   This comes with some nearly-instant interaction.

You can send me an email, telling me what you liked, what you didn’t like, or what you’d like to see more(or less) of.   I promise to reply to any email that isn’t purely spam.

That’s all for today.   Have a great weekend!

Carnival Roundups: The Weaponized Syphilis Edition

Life, Misc

Last weekend, I was in Denver for the Financial Blogger Conference.  Last week, I had a sore throat that got worse each day until my tonsils started touching on Friday.  I could barely talk, so I went to the doctor, then to bed.

It apparently wasn’t strep throat, but beyond that, it could be anything from motaba to weaponized syphilis*.

This is one of those occasions when I’m happy to be living in the future, where a quick trip to the clinic can knock out what would have been hopeless and fatal and few hundred years ago.  Antibiotics and a day spent in bed watching super hero movies made me better.  That beats bloodletting any day.

Live Real, Now was included in the following carnivals recently:

Yakezie Carnival:  FINCON Edition hosted by Finance Product Reviews

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by My University Money

Carnival of Retirement #36 hosted by Making Sense of Cents

Carnival of Personal Finance #377 hosted by Money Life and More

Yakezie Carnival:  Labor Day Edition hosted by Stock Trend Investing

Yakezie Carnival:  The Best of Summer Edition hosted by On Target Coach

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Simple Finance Blog

Carnival of Retirement #34 hosted by My Family Finances

Lifestyle Carnival #17 hosted by The Free Financial Advisor

Yakezie Carnival:  Dog Days of Summer Edition  hosted by Frugal Portland

Carnival of Money Pros: Back to School Edition hosted by See Debt Run

Nerdy Finance #7 hosted by Nerd Wallet

Yakezie Carnival hosted by The College Investor

Yakezie Carnival – Rescue Edition hosted by See Debt Run

Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #45 hosted by My University Money

Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Aaron Hung

Carnival of Retirement #32 hosted by Young Family Finance

Thanks for including my posts.

Get More Out of Live Real, Now

There are so many ways you can read and interact with this site.

You can subscribe by RSS and get the posts in your favorite news reader.  I prefer Google Reader.

You can subscribe by email and get, not only the posts delivered to your inbox, but occasional giveaways and tidbits not available elsewhere.

You can ‘Like’ LRN on Facebook.   Facebook gets more use than Google.  It can’t hurt to see what you want where you want.

You can follow LRN on Twitter.   This comes with some nearly-instant interaction.

You can send me an email, telling me what you liked, what you didn’t like, or what you’d like to see more(or less) of.   I promise to reply to any email that isn’t purely spam.

* Weaponized Syphilis

This involves giving each of the syphilis spirochetes an M16 and a Manifest Destiny indoctrination before releasing them into the wild.  The transport mechanism (the “insertion method”) remains as fun as ever.

Have a great weekend!

 

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