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The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.
I don’t attach much importance to dreams. They are just there to make sleepy-time less boring. Last night, I had a dream where I spent most of my time trying to prepare my wife to run our finances before telling my son that I wouldn’t be around to watch him grow up. That’s an unpleasant thought to wake up with. Lying there, trying to digest this dream, I started thinking about the transition from “I deal with the bills” to “I’m not there to deal with it”. We aren’t prepared for that transition. Last year, we started putting together our “In case of death” file, but that project fell short. The highest priorities are done. We have wills and health directives, but how would my wife pay the bills? Everything is electronic. Does she know how to log in to the bank’s billpay system? Which bills are only in my name, and will go away if I die? Is there a list of our life insurance policies?
I checked the incomplete file that contains this information. It hasn’t been updated since September. It’s time to get that finished. Procrastinating is inappropriate and denial is futile. Here’s a news flash: You are going to die. Hopefully, it won’t happen soon, but it will happen. Is your family prepared for that?
The questions are “What do I need?” and “What do I have?”
First and foremost, you need a will. If you have children and do not have a will, take a moment–right now– to slap yourself. A judge is not the best person to determine where your children should go if you die. The rest of it is minor, if you’re married. Let your next-of-kin, your spouse keep it. I don’t care. Just take care of your kids! Set up a trust to pay for the care of your children. Their new guardians will appreciate it. How hard is it to set up? I use Quicken Willmaker and have been very pleased. Of course, the true test is in probate court, and I won’t be there for it. If you are more comfortable getting an attorney, then do so. I’ve done it each way. You can cut some costs by using Willmaker, then taking it to an attorney for review.
It’s a sad fact that often, before you die, you spend some time dying. Do you have a health care directive? Does your family know, in writing, if and when you want the plug pulled? Who gets to make that decision? Have you set up a medical power of attorney, so someone can make medical decisions on your behalf if you aren’t able? Do you want, and if so, do you have a Do-Not-Resuscitate order? Willmaker will handle all of this, too.
What’s going to happen to your bank accounts? I’m personally a fan of keeping both of our names on all of our accounts. I share my life and my heart, I’d better be able to trust her with our money. If that’s not an option, for whatever reason, fill out the “Payable on Death” information for your accounts, establishing a beneficiary who can get access to your money if you die. Do you want your spouse to lose the house or the car if you die? Should your kids have to miss meals? Make sure necessary access to your money exists.
Does anybody know what you have for life insurance? Get a copy of the policy and make sure your spouse and someone else knows what company holds it and how much it is worth.
Now, it’s time to make some lists. You need to gather account numbers and contact information for everything.
Non-financial information to list:
Now, take all of this information and put it in a nice, fat envelope and lock it in the fireproof safe you have bolted to the floor. Make a copy and give it to someone you trust absolutely. Make sure someone knows the combination to the safe or where to find the key.
Your loved ones will appreciate it.
For the first time in 2 years(almost to the day), I am acquiring new debt that I can’t afford to pay off immediately. On a credit card.
Last Thursday, my son entered vision therapy. He has what is commonly known as a “lazy eye”, but is more properly called a “wandering eye”. His eyes don’t always lock on to whatever he is looking at. Instead, one of his eyes will (occasionally, but not always) drift to the side and shut off. His brain doesn’t interpret the signals from that eye.
We had two sessions of tests to diagnose the specific problems: $350.
We will have 28 weekly sessions of therapy @ $140 per session: $3920
There is an equipment fee: $85
That’s a total of $4355 over the next 7 months.
Insurance covers some of it, but the therapist is out-of-network, so it’s “pay first, get reimbursed later from the insurance company”. If we pay up front, we get 1 session free, bringing the price to $4215, minus insurance.
I have a health savings account that I have been trying to max out to cover this, to make my payments all pre-tax. I haven’t been able to get enough in there, yet. In fact, since I don’t have my kids on my insurance, my maximum HSA contribution is $3050.
Since finding out that vision therapy was going to be necessary, I have managed to save $1000 in cash, and about $1500 in my HSA. That’s $2500 of a $4215 bill, leaving $1715 that I still need to be able to cover.
Here is my plan:
We’re charging the entire $4215 at 11.9% interest on a card with a 2% travel rewards program. This will give me $84.30 worth of travel rewards good for reimbursing any travel expenses.
I will immediately pay off $1000 from cash savings.
I will also immediately file for an insurance reimbursement, which will cover 80% – $500, or $2972 minus a bit. Our insurance got a waiver on the pseudo-wonderful healthcare fraud act on the grounds that the plan sucks so bad that it would cost too much to comply with the law. No joke. I’m expecting about a $2500 reimbursement, and I have no idea how long that takes.
In 6 weeks, when I have maxed out my HSA contributions for the year, I will file for an HSA reimbursement for about $2500, leaving about $500 to cover some medical costs for the rest of the year. Vision therapy doesn’t count against my deductible, since my kids are on my wife’s insurance plan.
Starting in June, my debt snowball will no longer be going to max out my HSA and will instead go straight to this card, to finish paying it off as quickly as possible. That’s $750 per month.
Any money from any side work will also go towards this bill, but I don’t budget for that, because it isn’t reliable money.
The projected results:
$3215 on the credit card for 6 weeks @ 11.9% = $50 in interest payments.
After the HSA reimbursement, there will be $715 left to pay, which will be paid off in June for another $10 in interest.
When we get the insurance reimbursement, we’ll replenish the medical bill account, to start getting ready for the kid’s braces next year. We’ll drop $1500 into that account and use the remaining $1000 as a debt snowball payment.
We’ll end up paying $60 in interest to save $140 in therapy costs, so it’s good math, but I hate the idea of racking up another credit card bill. I could drop the interest costs a bit by raiding my emergency fund, but that still wouldn’t cover it all, and it would leave me with very little left for an actual emergency. I could raid the emergency fund for half of its value($700), and reduce the initial interest paid to $25 and the total interest paid to about $40, then use the $1000 leftover from the insurance reimbursement to replace my emergency fund.
From a question posted here:
Thank you for all your help in my previous question. After meeting with the agent, I’ve decided on term life insurance over whole life. But I am still not sure how much term life I should buy. Should I buy as much as I could afford or some specific amount?
My answer(edited a bit):
That question is far too open-ended.
Are you married? If yes, are you the primary breadwinner? Do you have children? Investments? Savings?
Here’s my situation:
I am married, with three children. I have the primary income.
We have a mortgage, a car payment, and some consumer debt.
I added up all of the debt as my base level of term life insurance. My family will not be burdened with debt if anything happens to me.
To the base level, I added 5 years of my net income. Without changing a thing, my family will be supported exactly as is for 5 years if I die. They won’t, however, have the same level of expenses, due to the base level of insurance paying off all debt. All of my living expenses also evaporate. For example, there will be one car sold, one less mouth to feed and body to dress, etc.
I figure with the lower expenses and no debt, my insurance will support my family for 10 to 15 years if my wife manages the money right. If she continues to work, it should last almost forever.
How do you figure the “right” amount of life insurance?[ad name=”inlineright”]
“Honey, here on national television, in front of a live studio audience, I’ve got a secret I’d like to share. You’re not our child’s mother. I’ve been sleeping with the milkman. And the goat. Your mom is the star of my new adult website. With the goat. And the milkman. I’ve got three other families, in three other cities. I lost the house to my gambling addiction. Those sores? Herpesyphiligonoritis. I got it from the foreign exchange student we hosted before I moved her to Dubuque and married her. The goat gave her away. The milkman cried. Oh, and I wore your panties to the Illinois Nazi reunion. I know how much you hate Illinois Nazis. But I still love you. And your sister. Especially your sister. She does that thing with her tongue….”
Why would anyone go on national television to share things like that?
More interesting: why would anybody stay on stage after hearing that?
Stay tuned.
I have this friend. He bought a couple of cars. He’s got some issues with money, partially revolving around a need to keep his assets below a certain threshold. So he put the cars in his girlfriend’s name. I know, it’s slightly crooked, but that makes the story more fun.
They broke up.
Recently, she called him to say she was suing him for the cars. She wanted them. She wanted to hurt him. She was mean. Somehow that turned into them agreeing to settle the case on Judge Joe Brown, on national television.
My friend spoke with the show’s producer, then last week, he was flown to California and put up in a hotel for a couple of days. When he arrived at the TV studio, he was informed that it wasn’t Judge Joe Brown, but a new show that will start airing in the fall called, The Test. According to CBS, The Test “is a one-hour conflict resolution talk show that will use lie detector and DNA tests to settle relationship and paternity disputes among the guests.” Coincidentally, CBS also owns Judge Joe Brown.
My friend got on stage with Dr. Phil’s son, Jay McGraw, and was accused of cheating on his girlfriend and stealing her identity. Lie detectors. Yelling. Accusations.
Why did he stay?
He wasn’t given his return plane ticket until they were done filming.
When he was done, they handed him a voucher for cab fare and the itinerary for his return flight. Until then, he had no other way to get home.
That’s why people stay on stage. It’s probably also why none of those shows ever have people with money of their own; they can find their own way home in a pinch.
Interesting side note: The show paid $200 and booked the cheapest possible return flight, with a 6 hour layover.
Health insurance is–without a doubt–expensive.
As much as I hate the idea of socialized health care, it does have one shiny selling point to counter its absolute immorality: it’s cheap. Assuming, of course, you ignore the higher taxes and skewed supply/demand balance.
Here in the US, we’re free from that burdensome contrivance. Instead, we have health care and health insurance industries that are heavily regulated and ultimately run by people who have A) never held a job outside of government or academia, and B) have no idea how to run either a hospital or a business. That works so much better. Some days, I think our health system would be better run by giving syringes and band-aids to drunken monkeys. The high-level decision making wouldn’t be worse.
Thanks to that mess and the high unemployment rate that somehow hasn’t been remedied by the 27 bazillion imaginary jobs that have been save or created in the last 2 years, some people are hurting. Not the poor. We have so many “safety net” programs that the poor are covered. I’m talking about the “too rich to be considered poor, but too poor to be comfortable”, the middle class.
If are much above the poverty line, you will stop qualifying for some of the affordable programs. The higher above the line you go, the less you qualify for. That makes sense, but the fact that we have so many safety net programs means there is a lot of demand created by all of the people who are getting their health care “free”.
That drives the prices up for the people who actually have to pay for their own care. Yes, even if you have an employer-sponsored plan, you are paying for the health insurance. That insurance is a benefit that is a part of your total compensation. If employers weren’t paying that, they could afford higher wages.
As the price goes up, employers are moving to a high-deductible plans, which puts a squeeze on the employees’ budgets. Employees–you and I, the people who actually have to pay these bills–are looking for ways to save money on the care, so they can actually afford to see a doctor.
In response to that squeeze, some unscrupulous people(#$%#@%! scammers) are capitalizing on the financial pain and selling “health discount plans” which promise extensive discounts for a cheap membership fee. These plans are not insurance. In a best-case scenario, the discount plans will get you a small discount from a tiny network of doctors and clinics. Prescription drug plans are no better. You may get a 60% discount, but only if you use a back-alley pharmacy in Nome, Alaska between the hours of 8 AM and 8:15 AM on January 32nd of odd leap years.
How can you tell it’s a scam?
The scammers will try to sell you on false scarcity. They’ll say the plan is filling up fast and you have to buy now if you want to get in on it. For all major purchases, if you aren’t going to be allowed time to research your options, assume it’s a scam. Good deals won’t evaporate.
They aren’t licensed. Call the Department of Commerce for your state and see if the company is a licensed insurance provider. Pro tip: they aren’t.
They don’t want you to read the plan until after you’ve paid. That’s a flashing, screaming, electro-shock warning sign for anything. Once you’ve given them your money, your options are reduced.
The price is amazingly low. Of course it is. They aren’t actually providing any services, so their overhead is nonexistent. They only have to pay for gas to get to the bank to cash your checks.
Really, the best way to judge if something is a scam is to go with your gut. Does it feel like a scam? Do you feel like you’re getting away with something? Does it sound too good to be true?
To recap: health care/prescription discount plans = bad juju.