- Bad. My 3yr old knows how the Nationwide commercial ends…including the agent's name. Too much TV. #
- RT @MoneyCrashers: Money Crashers 2010 New Year Giveaway Bash – $9,100 in Cash and Amazing Prizes http://bt.io/DZMa #
- Watching the horrible offspring of Rube Goldberg and the Grim Reaper: The Final Destination. #
- Here's hoping the franchise is dead: #TheFinalDestination #
- Wow. Win7 has the ability to auto-hibernate in the middle of installing updates. So much for doing that when I leave for the day. #
- This is horribly true: Spending Other People's Money by @thefinancebuff http://is.gd/75Xv2 #
- RT @hughdeburgh: "You can end half your troubles immediately by no longer permitting people to tell you what you want." ~ Vernon Howard #
- RT @BSimple: The most important thing about goals is having one. Geoffry F. Abert #
- RT @fcn: "You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." — Winston Churchill #
- RT @FrugalYankee: FRUGAL TIP: Who knew? Cold water & salt will get rid of onion smell on hands. More @ http://bit.ly/WkZsm #
- Please take a moment and vote for me. (4 Ways to Flog the Inner Impulse Shopper) http://su.pr/2flOLY #
- RT @mymoneyshrugged: #SOTU 2011 budget freeze "like announcing a diet after winning a pie-eating contest" (Michael Steel). (via @LesLafave) #
- RT @FrugalBonVivant: $2 – $25 gift certificates from Restaurant.com (promo code BONUS) http://bit.ly/9mMjLR #
- A fully-skilled clone would be helpful this week. #
- @krystalatwork What do you value more, the groom's friendship or the bride's lack of it?Her feelings won't change if you stay home.His might in reply to krystalatwork #
- I ♥ RetailMeNot.com – simply retweet for the chance to win an Apple iPad from @retailmenot – http://bit.ly/retailmenot #
- Did a baseline test for February's 30 Day Project: 20 pushups in a set. Not great, but not terrible. Only need to add 80 to that nxt month #
3 Habits Every Soon-to-be-Successful Debtor Needs to Cultivate
Getting out of debt is primarily a matter of changing your habits. We’ve all heard people swear by skipping your morning cup of coffee to get rich, but that’s just a small habit. Much more important are the big habits, the lifestyle habits. Here are 5 habits to cultivate for financial success.
Frugality
“Beware of little expenses; a small leak will sink a great ship”– Benjamin Franklin
As Chris Farrel wrote in “The New Frugality“, being frugal is not about being cheap, but finding the best value for your money. When my wife and I had our second baby, we couldn’t justify spending $170 on a breast pump, so we bought the $30 model. It was quite a bit slower than the expensive model, and was only a “single action”, but for $140 of savings, it seemed worth the trade. Six weeks later, it burned out so we bought a new one, still afraid to justify $170 on quality. This thing took at least 45 minutes to do its job. When it burned out 6 weeks later, we decided to go with the high-end model. This beauty had dual pumps, “baby-mouth simulation” and it was fast. The time was cut from a minimum of 45 minutes to a maximum of 15. That’s 3 hours of life reclaimed each day fro $140. Six months of breastfeeding for each of two kids means my wife regained 45 days of her life in exchange for that small amount of money. At the rate of 6 weeks per burnout, we would have gone through 8 cheap pumps, costing $240. The high-end unit was still going strong when we weaned baby #3. Buying quality saved us both time and money. I wish we would have gone with the good one from the start. Sometimes, the expensive option is also the cheap option.
Maturity
“Maturity is achieved when a person postpones immediate pleasures for long-term values.” -Joshua Loth Liebman
Being a mature, rational adult is hard. It means accepting delayed gratification over the more enjoyable instant variety. We save for retirement instead of charging a vacation. It takes a lot of restraint to put off buying the latest toys, clothes, gadgets, cars or whatever else is currently turning your crank until you actually have the money to actually afford it. It means planning your future instead of looking like a surprised bunny caught in a spotlight every time your property taxes come due. (Who knew that the year changed every year? Do they really expect annual payments annually? Geez! There’s so much to learn!) It means thinking about your purchases and buying what you actually need, actually want, and will actually use instead of resorting to retail therapy whenever you feel like a sad panda. The only benefit to mature, rational management of your finances is that, given time, you will have the security of knowing that, no matter what happens, you will be okay. That’s a huge benefit.
Pleasure
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“Do not bite at the bait of pleasure, till you know there is no hook beneath it.” – Thomas Jefferson
If it hurts, you won’t do it. You have to learn to take pleasure from from things that won’t make you broke and you have to learn not to hate putting off the things you can’t afford. Take pleasure in the little things. Enjoy the time with your family. Presence means so much more than presents. So many people never learn how to enjoy themselves. Take the time to experience life and enjoy doing it.
Update: This post has been included in the Carnival of Debt Reduction.
Getting Out of Debt: The Prime Rule
The American Dream has been perverted. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness has been cruelly warped to mean
“Toys, free stuff provided at the expense of others, and the ability to buy and do anything I want without regard for the consequences.” To fund this horrible new dream, the people who can’t convince a government program to finance it for them often turn to credit. Credit is the art of putting your future into hock for something that you probably don’t need or want and that won’t work by the time you are finished making payments.
Ick. I’ve chosen not to live my life that way. Every day, more people are waking from the consumerism fog and deciding to reel their lifestyles back in and take control of their lives. They take a look at the world around them, compare it to their check register, and realize that it’s just not sustainable. You can’t survive on credit forever. Eventually, you will realize that there isn’t enough money to continue to buy things today on tomorrow’s paycheck.
What’s the first thing you should do when you decide that a “normal” life—a life in debt—isn’t the way you are going to live your life?
Well, when you find yourself standing in a grave, stop digging. You can’t dig yourself out of a hole and you can’t borrow your way out of debt. If you want to get out of debt, you need to stop using more debt. Period.
It may seem impossible, and the people around you may try to convince you that you are crazy. It is not impossible, just time-consuming. Short of finding an insane amount of money hiding under your front step or a winning lottery ticket blowing across the sidewalk, there are no shortcuts to getting out of debt. It’s just a matter of making the payments and not using more credit.
As far as the haters, screw ‘em. They are brainwashed into thinking their unsustainable and insane lifestyle is not only normal, but necessary. You don’t get life advice in a padded room, and you don’t plan your finances with a debt-addict.
Getting out of debt is a simple process, but that doesn’t make it easy. It only has two real steps: stop using debt, and keep making the payments.
Party Planning on a Super Tight Budget
I like to party.
Actually, that’s a lie. I’m too introverted to be a partier. More accurately, I like to throw two parties per year. I am also cheap frugal, so I try not to break the bank feeding fifty of my closest friends.
I have two entirely different parties. The first, known as the “Fourth Annual Second Deadly Sin Barbecue of Doom”, is a daytime party with a lot of food. The second is a Halloween party which takes place at night and refreshments are more of the liquid variety. Two different parties, two different strategies to keep them affordable.
Meat
For the Halloween party, meat consists entirely of a meat/cheese/cracker tray and a crock-pot full of either sloppy joes or chili. Quick and easy for about $20. For the barbecue, meat is the main attraction. The menu varies a bit from year to year. Last year, we had burgers, brats, hot dogs, a leg of lamb, pulled pork, and a couple of fatties. The year before, we had a turducken, but no fatties. From a frugal standpoint, the only meat mistakes were the turducken and the lamb. Neither are cheap, but both as delicious. The rest of the meat needs to be bought over the months preceding the party, as they go on sale. Ten pounds of beef, 2 dozen brats, 2 dozen hot dogs and a pork roast can be had for a total of about $75, without having to worry about picking out the hooves and hair. Fatties cost less than $5 to make.
Sides
Both parties have chips, crackers and a vegetable tray. Chips are usually whatever is on sale or the store brand if it’s cheaper. Depending on our time management, we try to cut the vegetables ourselves, but have resorted to paying more for a pre-made veggie tray in the past. This runs from $15-30.
Drinks
For kids and adults who don’t drink, I make a 5 gallon jug of Kool-Aid. Cost: About $3. For adults, I provide a few cases of beer. I don’t drink fancy beer, so this runs about $50. For the Halloween party, I throw open my liquor cabinet. Whatever is in there is available for my guests. The rule is “I provide the beer. If you want something specific, bring it yourself.” I have a fairly well-stocked liquor cabinet, but I don’t stock what I don’t like or don’t use. Part of the stock is what guests have left in the past. I don’t drink much and I buy liquor sporadically when I have a whim for something specific, so raiding the leftovers in the liquor cabinet doesn’t register on my party budget.
Potluck
While it seems like an obvious and easy way to keep costs down, I do not and will not expect my guests to bring anything. I throw a party to showcase either A) my cooking, or B) my Halloween display. I don’t charge admission. I don’t charge for a glass. I throw a party so I can have fun with the people I care about and the people the people I care about care about. I consider it a serious breach of etiquette to ask anybody to bring something. On the other hand, if someone offers, I will not turn it down.
Fun
The most important part of either of my parties is fun. All else is secondary. I seem to be successful, since reservations are made for my spare beds a full year in advance. Last Halloween, people came from 3 states.
Cost
How much do my mildy-over-the-top parties cost? The barbecue runs about $150-180 plus charcoal and propane. Yes, I use both. I’ll have 2 propane grills, 1 charcoal grill, and a charcoal smoker running all day. The Halloween party costs $80-100 for the basics. The brain dip costs another $20 and there’s always at least another $50 in stuff that seems like a good idea to serve.
Update: This post has been included in the Festival of Frugality.
Indio Downey: The Cost of Drug Addiction
Indio Falconer Downey, the son of actor Robert Downey Jr., was arrested Sunday, June 29, 2014 on drug possession charges. At the time of his arrest, Indio was a passenger in a vehicle that was stopped around 2 PM. At the time of the traffic stop, Indio was found to have what appeared to be cocaine as well as a smoking pipe. He posted bail around 9 PM that evening and was released.
Indio’s father had many well-publicized drug addiction problems throughout the 1990s, attending a number of rehab facilities in an attempt to beat his drug addiction. The 49-year old actor says he was introduced to drugs by his father at the age of eight, and by 20 was a full-fledged addict. Just two years after Indio was born in 1994, the actor was stopped by police driving his Porsche on Sunset Boulevard naked and in possession of cocaine, heroin and a .357 Magnum. Just days before he was due to be charged for those crimes, he was arrested after being found passed out in a neighbor’s home. Indio’s father spent 12 months in prison and, in 2000, when Indio was six, Robert Downey Jr. was arrested in a Palm Springs hotel room with cocaine and wearing a Wonder Woman Costume. Before a preliminary hearing could be held on the charges, Indio’s father was arrested for being under the influence of an undisclosed stimulant. Indio’s mother, Deborah Falconer, divorced his father in 2004.
Indio’s Drug Abuse
According to reports, Indio’s father has been helping his son deal with addiction problems for many years. Indio has been in and out of treatment centers, and some reports say he had remained clean and sober for some time, in some part due to his father’s counseling. In 2013, there were reports that Indio was being treated for a “pill problem,” which his mother claimed was not a significant problem. According to Deborah Falconer, Indio was taking “one pill a day” and that he was not addicted. She said Indio was being treated with “holistic, natural and orthomolecular therapy.” After Indio’s arrest on Sunday, however, Robert thanked the Sheriff’s Department for their intervention, stating that there was a “genetic component to addiction” and that “Indio likely inherited it.” Robert has been clean and sober since late 2001.
Children of Addicts
One of the unknown costs of addiction is that children of addicts are eight times more likely to develop an addiction than those whose parents are not addicts. Many studies have confirmed that addiction is a combination of genetics and poor coping skills. In addition, sons of addicted fathers are four times more at risk for developing an addiction than the sons of non-addicted fathers. Much of this is because addicted parents often lack the ability to provide structure or discipline, and the sons of addicted fathers receive harsher discipline than those of non-addicted fathers. These statistics clearly show that the cost of addiction on offspring is high, and indicates why Indio may have turned to substance abuse.
It is clear that this recent arrest shows that Indio may be facing an escalating drug problem, similar to what his father faced in the 1990s. After seeing his father as an addict, as well as the well-known genetic connection regarding addiction, Indio may need intensive therapy in order to fight his addictions.
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53 Percent
I didn’t grow up with money. I never lacked for anything important, like food, clothes, shelter, affection, but we weren’t exactly rolling in cash.
When I was 6, I got a paper route so I could buy my own toys.
When I was 13, I started doing odd jobs on nearby farms.
When I was 15, I worked construction with my Dad in the summer. When school started in the fall, I gave up a study hall and my lunch period to work in the lunch room, serving food and washing dishes, for $4.25 per hour.
Within two weeks of getting my driver’s license at 16, I got a job working evenings and weekends washing dishes. I’d call it a part-time job, but it wasn’t, most weeks. A couple of months of busting my butt got me promoted to cook, which was more fun and had better pay. $6.25 and hour was a decent amount for a teenager in 1994.
Three days after graduating high school, I moved out.
At 18, I was living on my own, working two jobs. During the day, I stacked pallets. I stood at the end of a conveyor belt, picked up the 50 pound bags as they came my way, took 3 steps and set them back down. 1500 times a day. In the evenings, I was a cook at a different restaurant 5 miles away. My car was broken, so I had to bike to both jobs. In the winter. In Minnesota. That winter, my parents passed up a new washing machine to buy me a beater car so I didn’t have to freeze. It lasted until spring, but I’m still grateful for that car. That’s the only time I’ve taken money from my parents as an adult.
At 20, I was working 12 hour graveyard shifts in a machine shop when Brat #1 came along. I’d work from 5PM to 5AM, come home and take the baby so my wife could get 5 hours of uninterrupted sleep. That kid drank 8-10 ounces of milk or formula every hour, so without that, the idea of uninterrupted sleep was a cruel joke. We qualified for WIC, a “feed your family” welfare program. I was broke and scared of formula prices, so we signed up. My son puked up the one brand of formula we were allowed, and it hurt my pride, so we cancelled without ever using the benefits.
After 6 months of missing so much of my family’s life, I quit that job and moved into a call center, taking a $4/hour pay cut, before overtime. Fortunately, busting my butt every day allowed me to stomp all over my goals and get some decent bonus pay.
Working a daytime schedule also allowed me to go to school part-time. Here’s the scene: At 21, I had a baby, a full-time job, and I was going to school. I took student loans to make that happen. I was also doing side jobs fixing computers. Traveling IT for people who have no idea how to work a mouse. During this time, we started accumulating debt, based entirely on our own choices.
Within a few months of graduating, the years of busting my butt in the call center paid off and I got promoted to be the administrator for the phone system and collection system, which gave me valuable experience.
Until I got laid off.
Again, busting my butt saved it. My boss volunteered to “forget” about the vacation time I had used that year so it would get cashed out on my last day. I could cover expenses for a while.
Job hunting became a full-time job and it paid off. I landed my current job right as my funds ran out.
I work, on average, 50 hours per week. When it’s needed, I’ve cleared 100 hour work weeks. I have a side business as a firearms instructor. I have a side business doing web consulting for businesses. I blog here.
I do whatever it takes to support my family. I am that support.
I have never had an unemployment check, and I’ve never used government charity.
I have busted my butt to be where I am today, and continue to bust my butt to make it better.
Some day, I’ll be out of debt, and that will also be due to hard work, not charity.
I love my family.
I pay my taxes.
I give to charity.