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5 Ways to Force Your Spouse to Get Frugal*
Communication is important in a marriage. If you can’t communicate, how are you going to get your way?** I’ve helpfully compiled the best possible ways to get your spouse on board with your budget plans.
- Don’t include her. When I absolutely, positively cannot afford to be working towards a different goal than my wife, I do my best to ignore her. I don’t tell her how much we’ve paid off, how much we have left, or what we can afford to spend on groceries. I think she enjoys not having to worry about the petty details like “Are we overdrawn?” or “Will we be eating Alpo next week?” I’ll do anything to make her life easier.
- Nag. Nothing convinces my wife to do things my way like unending scolding. If I just remind her, day and night, surely she’ll cooperate with my budgeting plans and ideas to save money, right? Every body loves the attention, and, since we got a text messaging plan, I can shoot her a message every five minutes while she’s at the store. In all seriousness, this is actually a problem and a source of friction at my house. Reminding her every time she goes to the store is not an effective strategy.
- Whine. If nagging fails, I always try to take the advice of my toddlers and whine until I get my way. “But Ho-uh-neee-eee! Why’d you buy tha-at?” It’s always been a big hit at my house. My wife appreciates the effort I put into getting the third, screechy syllable into simple words, just to try to convince her to give up or see things my way.
- Obsess. This goes hand-in-hand with both #2 and #3. If I never giver her the chance to forget about our goals, she can never stray from them. A memo in the morning, hourly text reminders, and a daily summary of our account balances and month-to-date budget compliance just keeps us working together. Everything we do can be tied back to our frugal choices and debt repayment, whether it’s a game of Sorry or a trip to a wrestling tournament.
- Yell. If all else fails, just turn up the volume. If there’s a problem, I nag at level 10. Whining loudly enough to wake the neighbors will convince her to comply with my wishes next time. This has the added benefit of allowing my kids to receive the wisdom of my experience, even if they are in the basement playing games with their friends.
*This obviously isn’t a gender-specific article, but, as a man, I write from a man’s perspective and my pronouns match my perspective.
**Sarcasm. Really. Following these rules should result in divorce, NOT happy agreement. If you are operating under this action plans, get therapy.
Update: This post has been included in the Carnival of Personal Finance.
Making Extra Money Part 3: Product Selection
When you’re setting up a niche site, you need to monetize it. You need to have a way to make money, or it’s a waste of time.
There are two main ways to do that: AdSense or product promotion. To set up an AdSense site, you write a bunch of articles, post them on a website with some Google ads, and wait for the money to roll in.
I don’t do that.
I don’t own a single AdSense site and have never set one up. This article is not about setting up an Adsense site.
My niches site are all product-promotion sites. I pick a product–generally an e-book or video course–and set up a site dedicated to it.
Naturally, picking a good product is an important part of the equation.
The most important part of product selection is that the product has an affiliate program. Without that, there’s no money to be made. There are a lot of places to find affiliate programs. Here are a few:
- Amazon. If you don’t live in one of the states that Amazon has dropped in retaliation for passing laws that attempt to circumvent the Supreme Court’s ruling on collecting sales tax, you can sign up as an associate and collect a commission on every referral you send that turns into a purchase. That means you have a lot of product to choose from. Unfortunately, your commission is small, so you need to promote fairly expensive products to get a decent return. On the other hand, people trust Amazon, so that’s one less hurdle to making a sale.
- Commission Junction. These are the people managing affiliate programs for a large number of credit cards and banks. If you’ve opened an account with INGDirect through one of my links, I got a commission for the referral. (Thank you!) They have a lot of other products, too.
- e-Junkie. This one is a popular distribution system for bloggers. It’s likely that, if you’ve bought an ebook from a blogger, e-Junkie handled the fulfillment process. A lot of the products available there have an affiliate program, but that is up to the owner of the product.
- ClickBank. My favorite. This is one of the largest affiliate networks specializing in electronic products, whether that’s membership sites, ebooks, or video courses. Commissions are good, often 50-75%. They also offer a 60 day guarantee of every product sold through their site, which helps soothe the wary customer. This is the site I’ll be using for this series.
The first thing you need to do is sign up for whichever program you intend to use.
If you’re not going with Clickbank, feel free to skip ahead to the section on keyword research.
Once you are signed up and logged in, click on the “Marketplace” link at the top of the screen.
From here, it’s just a matter of finding a good product to sell. Here are the niches we’re going to be looking for:
- Back pain
- Bankruptcy
- Conflict resolution at work
- Detox diets
- Fat kids
- Foreclosure avoidance
- Job hunting
- Weddings
- Writing sales copy
I’m going to look for one or two good products in each niche. When that’s done we’ll narrow it down by consumer demand.
For now, go to advanced search.
Enter your keyword, pick the category and set the advanced search stats. Gravity is the number of affiliates who have made sales in the last month. I don’t like super-high numbers, but I also want to make sure that the item is sellable. Over 10 and under 50 or so seems to be a good balance.
The average sale just ensures that I’ll make a decent amount of money when someone buys the product. I usually aim for $25 or more in commissions per sale. Also, further down, check the affiliate tools box. That means the seller will have some resources for you to use.
This combination will give us 36 products to check out for back pain, unfortunately, none of the results are for back pain products. After unchecking the affiliate tools and setting the gravity to greater than 1, I’ve got 211 results. Sorting by keyword relevance, I see three products, two of which look like something I’d be interested in promoting. One has a 45% commission, the other is 55%. The X-Pain Method has an initial commission of $34 and claims a 5% refund rate. Back Pain, Sciatica, and Bulging Disc Relief pays $16, which will make it a potentially easier sale. I’ll add both to the list for further research.
I’m not going to detail the search for the rest of the niches. That would be repetitive. You can see my selections here:
- Back pain – X-Pain Method; Back Pain, Sciatica, and Bulging Disc Relief
- Bankruptcy – I’m dropping this one from the list. It’s too complicated and deserves an attorney. I don’t know enough about the topic to make sure it is up to date.
- Conflict resolution at work – Management Training: By the Book; Anger Management for the 21st Century
- Detox diets – Master Cleanse Secrets: 10 Day Diet; Master Cleanse Insider; Eating for Energy: Raw Food Diet for Weight Loss
- Fat kids – I’m dropping this one, too. A kid’s health is too important. I don’t want to sell a dangerous or unethical product.
- Foreclosure avoidance – How to Stop Foreclosure in 7 Days Flat; Foreclosure Defense Secrets
- Job hunting – Guerrilla Resumes; Amazing Cover Letters
- Weddings – All Types of Wedding Speeches; The Master Wedding Planning Guide; Amazing Wedding Planning
- Writing sales copy – Instant Swipe File; Ad Copy Creator Pro; How to Write Killer Copy
Now we’re going to go through a few steps for each of these products.
The Sales Page
We need to make sure the sales page doesn’t suck. If the site doesn’t work, is hard to read or navigate, has a hard-to-find order button, or just doesn’t look professional, it’s getting cut.
- Raw Foods is eliminated. The sales video is horrible and the order link is at the bottom of several screens worth of nothing. It’s a crap site.
- The 7 day foreclosure-avoidance product is out. Site’s down today. I want reliability.
- Management Training By The Book is out. I don’t like typos on the sales page, especially in the page title.
The Email List
If it has an email subscription form, we’ll need to subscribe, then double-check to make sure our affiliate information isn’t getting dropped in the emails. If it is, the seller is effectively stealing commissions. In the interest of time and laziness, I’m going to eliminate anyone pushing for an email subscription. It’s harder–and time-consuming–to monitor that. On of my niche site had a seller completely drop their product. Instead, they pushed for email subscriptions so they could promote other products as an affiliate. Absolutely unethical.
- Wedding speeches is eliminated for throwing a mandatory email entry into the order process. There’s no guarantee they are up to anything shady, but I’m taking the simple route.
Checkout and Credit
Finally, we’re going to visit the checkout page. You need to do this from every links in the newsletter and the links on the sales page, just to make sure you’ll get your money.
The way to tell who’s being credited is to look at the bottom of the order page, under the payment information. It should say [affiliate = xxx] where xxxis your ClickBank ID. Anything else, and the product gets cut from the list.
When you are checking these, don’t click on every possible link at once. That confuses the cookies. Do one at a time. I tried to do it in one batch for this post and lost half of the cookies. If it weren’t for the fact that I already own one of the products and bought it through my own link and got credited, I would have been talking undeserved trash about thieving companies.
Other Factors
Sometimes, when you’re examining a product, it just doesn’t feel right. When that happens, drop it. There are millions of other products you can promote. In this case, I’m dropping the anger management program because, in my experience, angry people don’t think they are the problem. Here’s a life tip: If everyone else is a jerk, the problem probably isn’t everyone else.
- Another important factor is the sales page itself. If it doesn’t make you want to buy the product, why would anyone else?
- Amazing Cover Letters is eliminated because it’s too easy to overlook the buy link. If I have to hunt for it, it’s losing customers.
- Amazing Wedding Planning is getting eliminated because I don’t like the sales page. The buy link is easy to overlook, and it doesn’t compel me to buy.
Now we’re down to 10 products in 6 niches. At this point, we’re comfortable with the sales pages and we know that they are crediting commissions. As it stands right now, all of the products are worth promoting.
- Back pain – X-Pain Method; Back Pain, Sciatica, and Bulging Disc Relief
- Detox diets – Master Cleanse Secrets: 10 Day Diet; Master Cleanse Insider
- Foreclosure avoidance – Foreclosure Defense Secrets
- Job hunting – Guerrilla Resumes
- Weddings – The Master Wedding Planning Guide;
- Writing sales copy – Instant Swipe File; Ad Copy Creator Pro; How to Write Killer Copy
We’ll make the final determination after doing some heavy keyword research in the next installment. That’s where we’ll find out how hard it is to compete.
Any questions?
How Banks Work
On the first and the fifteenth of every month, my paycheck is deposited into my bank account. Some fraction of it is saved, while another(larger) fraction is spent. They put the money in a vault and protect it from being stolen. Anything I manage to save and anything I haven’t managed to spend yet, will build interest. The bank pays me to keep my money there, even if it’s just for a short time. Why would they do that? If I asked you to hold on to $100 for me, in exchange for giving me $10 next week, you’d laugh at me. Right? If I told you that I was expecting you to keep that $100 heavily guarded in a locked room that requires a staff and utilities, you’d try to have me committed, yet that’s what banks do every day.
What’s in it for the bank?
Let’s start at the beginning. In the financial world, there are fundamentally two types of people: those who have money and those who need it.
The people who have money get it by producing something or otherwise providing value to someone for something. They then spend less than they made, leading to an accumulation of money. Woo! Rich people! Naturally, this money gets stuffed in a mattress for safe-keeping. Their money does nothing except collect dust and, occasionally, hungry insects. It is also used to soften a hard mattress.
People who need money have a few choices. They can beg for it, work for it, or steal it. The third option leads to perforation or imprisonment, so we won’t address that one. Now, you can work for your paycheck, like most adults, or you can go, hat in hand, to a charity and ask for money. But what if you want to start a business? You’ve invented the super-widget, a device guaranteed to revolutionize the world more than anything since sliced bread or the USB-powered pet rock. You got a concept and a prototype, you just don’t have the tooling or manpower to produce the millions of super-widgets the world will soon be beating a path to your door to own. You also lack a marketing budget to tell the world to stock up on path-beaters to make it to your door. What do you do?
Enter banks.
A bank will approach the first class of people and talk their money out of the mattresses and mayonnaise jars. They offer to hold the money for the people who have it. They will protect it from theft and they will pay the owner a fee for the privilege of holding on to the cash safely. Of course savers jump at the chance. They can quit worrying about the maid making the bed and becoming a millionaire and they can build wealth with no work. But wait…TANSTAAFL, right? You can’t get something for nothing. The world doesn’t work that way.
The bank takes your money–and the money of thousands of people like you–for safe-keeping. They pay you a fee, called interest. The rest, the loan out to the second group of people, the ones who need the money. They set aside some of the deposits so the owners can make withdrawals, but the rest goes into the loan-pool. People who need money come to the bank, explain their needs and demonstrate their ability to repay the loan, then they are given money for a fee, also called interest. The interest rate for the borrower is significantly higher–sometimes 20 times higher–than the interest paid to depositors. The difference between interest earned and interest paid is what pays the bank’s bills. That gap pays for the rent, taxes, and payroll.
Ultimately, a bank’s job is to connect the savers with the spenders in a way that’s reliable enough to ensure everybody benefits. If anybody in the chain ceases to benefit, the system collapses. Depositors switch back to using mattresses, borrowers go back to their loan-shark grandparents, and banks close their doors. This is the system that allows the entrepreneurial spirit to thrive, while making money for everyone involved.
Does Money Make Miley Cyrus Act Crazy?
If you’re like millions of people who saw Miley Cyrus’s performance at the MTV Video Music Awards recently, you’ve probably wondered what the effect of massive success on the music and acting star. Cyrus seems to be
doing everything possible to remake her image in the exact opposite of her squeaky clean mold that Disney and other companies have created for her over the last several years. (A rumor has it that Disney even created a contractual obligation for Cyrus to maintain a certain haircut during her “Hannah Montana” television show.) There’s a sense of someone taking on their first sense of independence, and running with it — the star seemed to be sending the message to the audience that she was not going to live according to the expectations of others anymore, and from the look of it, they got that message loud and clear.
The horrified looks of Rihanna, Drake, and Will Smith aside, the real question people had is whether the massive financial rewards of Cyrus’ singing career can explain her crazy behavior. Cyrus is said to be worth about $100,000,000 — certainly a fortune by any standards. And since she is still struggling with the problems of young adulthood — forming an identity, understanding her values and taking a place in society, it’s very likely that her finances contribute to at least some of her behavior.This effect of money can come from many different areas of life. For one, many people who become wealthy at a young age are suddenly struck with the fact that they have no need to work, but who often want to develop a career and contribute to society. Take Steve Jobs for example, who at 31 years old was fired from Apple Inc. by the company’s board of directors. Jobs had in fact started the company himself, and was worth well over a hundred million dollars by that time. And yet, feeling like contributing to society was more important to his life than resting on his laurels, Jobs started a new company, NeXT, where he hoped to contribute inexpensive computers to universities.
The fact that Cyrus is barely into her 20s should tell you something about how much time she has to develop her career. She has enough to retire at an age when most people are just starting their first real job. And that is a tough position to be in. If she is hoping to push her singing and acting career well into adulthood — as most artists would like to — it may be that she is trying to make her mark now. Think of it a bit like Bob Dylan in 1964, releasing electric music for the first time, when before that point he was primarily known as a folk singer making gentle acoustic music.
Dylan’s idea may have been a bit like what Cyrus’ is. That is to say, maybe Miley Cyrus is trying to avoid becoming a has-been, a relic of the 2000’s who burned out playing inoffensive pop music. If this is the case, Cyrus may be able to shift her career into a different mode by showing herself to be an uncompromising artist. Remember that even the greats of the past — Frank Sinatra for example — were once viewed as essentially music for teenagers, and not serious artists. Sinatra even suffered career failure in his 20’s when his audience grew up and moved on to other things. But he came back to record success when he began allowing his music to mature and his ideas to gain focus. If Cyrus can pull such a move, she may not be remembered as a teeny-bopper, but as a serious artist.
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A Moment of Clarity
- Image by Matt Stratton via Flickr
Ten years ago, I buried myself in debt. There was no catastrophic emergency or long-term unemployment, just a series of bad decisions over the course of years.
We bought a (short) series of new cars, a house full of furniture, electronics, hundreds of books and movies, and so much more. We threw a wedding on credit and financed an addition on our house. We didn’t gamble or drink it away, we just spent indiscriminately. We have a ton of stuff to show for it and a peeling credit card to prove it.
What changed?
In October 2007, we found out brat #3 was on the way. Don’t misunderstand, this was entirely intentional, but our…efficiency caught us by surprise. It took several years to get #2. We weren’t expecting #3 to happen in just a couple of weeks. #2 wasn’t even a year old when we found out she was going to be a big sister. That’s two kids in diapers and three in daycare at the same time.
The technical term for this is “Oh crap”.
I spent weeks poring over our expenses, trying to find a way to make our ends meet, or at least show up in the same zip code occasionally.
I finally made my first responsible financial decision…ever. I quit smoking. At that point, I had been smoking a pack a day or more for almost 15 years. With the latest round of we’re-going-to-raise-the-vice-tax-to-convince-people-to-drop-their-vices-then-panic-when-people-actually-drop-their-because-we-made-them-too-expensive taxes, I was spending at least $60 per week, at least.
Interesting side story: A few years ago, Wisconsin noticed how many Minnesotans were crossing the border for cheap smokes and decided to cash in by raising their cigarette taxes. The out-of-state market immediately dried up. Econ 101.
So I quit, saving $250 per month.
Our expenses grew to consume that money, which we were expecting. (Remember, we were expecting a baby!) Unfortunately, our habits didn’t change. We still bought too much, charged too much on our credit cards, and used our overdraft protection account every month. At 21% interest!
Nothing else changed for another year and a half. My wife would buy stuff I didn’t like and we’d fight about it. I’d buy stuff she didn’t like and we’d fight about it. When we weren’t arguing about it, we’d just silently spend it all as fast as we could.
Bankruptcy was looming. We had $30,000 on our credit cards and our overdraft protection account was almost maxed out. Have you ever thought you’d have to sell your house quickly?
One day, while I was researching bankruptcy attorneys, I ran across Dave Ramsey. When I got to daycare that evening to pick up the kids, I noticed they had The Total Money Makeover on the bookshelf, so I asked to borrow it.
I read the book twice, had a very frank discussion with my wife about the possibility of bankruptcy, and we set out on the path to financial freedom together.
What made you decide to handle your finances responsibly? Or, perhaps more importantly, what’s holding you back?
