What would your future-you have to say to you?
The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.
What would your future-you have to say to you?
When I was in high school and working 15 to 20 hours a week, my mom gave me free rein to use the money I earned as I would like. Actually, she said nothing to me about saving for college or putting some money into savings.
When I had friends who complained that they had to put away some of their earnings, I commiserated with them. How unfair of their parents to make them save some of their money! They worked hard for their money, often at crappy part-time jobs. They deserved to spend the money any way they saw fit.
The way I saw it, why save for college? According to financial aid rules, if the student has any savings, she would have to use the majority of it to pay for college. How unfair. To add insult to injury, if prospective college students have some savings, they would qualify for less financial aid, which often meant fewer student loans.
The injustice.
Yes, it was better to spend my hard earned money than save it and be penalized.
No one told me differently. In fact, many people in my family agreed with me and encouraged me to buy a used car to get to and from my job. Of course, I paid the loan payments for the car, the gas I used and my insurance out of money from my job. That was a responsible use of money, but I also went out to eat with friends, a lot. At 16, I was going out to eat with my friends twice a week at least.
However, my plan worked perfectly. When I went to college, I didn’t have to use any of my hard earned cash. No, not me, because I hadn’t saved anything. Instead, I left college with nearly $20,000 in student loan debt. I took two years off and paid down as much student loan debt as I could, getting it down to about $8,000, but then I went to graduate school and took on more student loan debt. I graduated with nearly $25,000 in debt total. I am still paying on it today, 13 years later.
Now that I am the parent, I am one of those “awful” parents who makes her kids save. My son knows when he gets his allowance, some goes to save, some goes to donate, and some goes to spend. True, it makes me cringe when he uses his spend money on little trinkets like temporary tattoos, stickers, and gum, but I keep silent. He did the work to earn the money, and he can spend it as he likes. However, I am inflexible with saving; that money must be set aside. When he goes to college, I expect that he will have to use the majority of that money. Rather than seeing it as a waste, I see it as an important component of his financial education. Spending his money to pay a portion of his college education will hopefully make him take college more seriously.
Meanwhile, I have already begun having chats with him about money, spending, and budgeting. He watches his dad and I work hard to pay down our debt with gazelle intensity. He sees me use a calculator at the grocery store to see how much our groceries will be.
Ultimately, he will make his own financial decisions as he grows up, but I plan to teach him throughout these important years so that even if he turns into a spendthrift, he will have a firm financial understanding to revert to as he ages. While my mom taught me how to stretch money further, she never taught me how to save; I hope saving is a lesson my son takes with him throughout his adulthood.
How do you teach your kids about money management?
Melissa writes at Fiscal Phoenix where she encourages people to rise from the ashes of their financial mistakes as she and her husband are doing.
Everybody knows the reputation New Year’s resolutions get for being abandoned in under a month. Following through with your saving and budget goals can be difficult. There are thousands of strategies for keeping your resolutions, but I’ve found that the best goal-keeping mechanism is to make yourself accountable. There are several ways to accomplish this.
Make Firm Goals. If your goals are open to interpretation, it’s easy to interpret them in a way that lets you off the hook. Make the goals concrete and immune to interpretation, and that can’t happen. “Get up earlier” may mean five minutes, which is technically meeting the goal, but not really. “Get up at 5am” is clear and concrete.
Get a “Goal Buddy”. When I am out shopping, if I’m struck by the impulse to buy something I probably don’t need, I call my wife. She’s more than happy to encourage me to put the movie or game back on the shelf. I have a friend who will call me up if he’s thinking about buying a new gadget so I can talk him down. Friends don’t let friends mortgage their futures.
Go Public. As you may have noticed, I’m being as open as possible with my goals for the year. I have laid out clear goals and I provide fairly frequent updates through both this site and twitter. If I fail, I fail in front of an audience. That’s strong encouragement to succeed. Tell your family, friends and coworkers. Announce your goals on the internet. Make it as difficult as possible to fail gracefully.
Punish Yourself. I have a line item in my budget called “In the hole“. If I go over budget one month, the overage is entered as an expense the following month. This serves the double purpose of getting the budget back on track and forcing me to sacrifice something the next month to make that happen. Another option may be to write out a check to a charity you hate, and drop it in the mail if you miss your goal. Anything unpleasant can work as your punishment.
How do you keep your goals?
Today, it is my please to host the 287th Festival of Frugality, the Independence Day Edition. Yesterday, was Independence Day in the US. It’s the day we celebrate throwing off the yolk of high-tax, no-rights tyranny and blowing stuff up.
That’s not what this Festival is about. As much as I love this country and enjoyed celebrating, today, the theme is the Independence Day movie.
Coolest ID4 fact, ever: A promotional piece that aired in Spain for this film set off a “War of the Worlds” type of wide spread panic. The promo featured a popular Spanish news anchor and the piece ran as if there really WAS an alien attack to occur on July 4.
The explosion of the Welcome Wagon Helicopters was actually footage of a pyrotechnics accident on set.
Miss T. gives us Seven Reasons to Avoid Penny Auction Sites. She does a great job of explaining the evil that is Penny Auctions, from outright fraud to the rip-off that is the basic business model. Some of these sites make $5000 or more on an iPad auction. They don’t even have to carry an inventory before running an auction.
Independence Day holds the record for most miniature model-work. It beat the previous record by double.
Philip submits Turn Wasted Extra Money Into a Debt Payment. I have a friend who is positive he can’t reduce his monthly expenses at all, while eating out almost every day.
The alien ship “miniature” was 65 feet across.
Boomer presents Financial Support For Your Adult Children. I love my parents. A lot. I couldn’t imagine moving back in with them, and I’m pretty sure they’d feel the same way soon enough. Although, Mom, if you’re reading this, can I have an allowance again?
This was the highest grossing film in 1996.
Suba presents Why you should not use 401k. I’ve never questioned the wisdom of maxing out a 401k. It’s good to see those assumptions challenged and the numbers crunched.
President Whitmore: Good morning. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. Mankind, that word should have new meaning to all of us. We cannot be consumed by our petty differences anymore. Perhaps it is fate that today is the fourth of July, and we will once again be fighting for our freedom. But not for freedom from tyrrany or oppression or persecution. We’re fighting for our right to live, to exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day when the world stood up and declared in one voice that we will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day!
FMF presents Save Money on Groceries by Shopping on Wednesday posted at Free Money Finance.
Harri Pierce presents Have a second hand summer posted at TotallyMoney.
Daniel presents Top 10 Reasons to Shop Online vs. Shopping In-Store posted at Sweating The Big Stuff.
President Whitmore: It’s a fine line between standing behind a principle and hiding behind one.
Philip Taylor presents The Best Time to Buy posted at PT Money Personal Finance.
Outlaw presents Pay Yourself First and Have Money in the Bank posted at Outlaw Finance.
Crystal presents Frugal Tips for the Pet Dog posted at Budgeting in the Fun Stuff.
Matt presents The Price of Water posted at Stupid Cents.
That’s right! That’s what you get! Look at you! Ship all banged up! Who’s the man? Who’s the man?! Wait until I get another plane! I am going to line up all your friends right beside you! ~ Captain Steven Hiller
Alan presents The Cost of Online Gaming: Free to Play posted at Canadian Finance Blog.
Paula @ AffordAnything.org presents Diets and Debt: Managing Money and Your Weight posted at AffordAnything.org.
Kay Lynn presents Summer Fun for the Frugal Family posted at Bucksome Boomer.
Jacob @ My Personal Finance Journey presents Top 10 Money Saving Tips posted at My Personal Finance Journey.
Glen Craig presents The Cost of Clutter on Your Finances and Life posted at Free From Broke.
Eddie presents 55 Suggestions To Save $1000 posted at Finance Fox.
Darwin presents Are You Better Off Than Your Parents? posted at Darwin’s Money.
Sustainable PF presents Sustainability Tip #179: Loose Cap Lose Gas posted at Sustainable Personal Finance.
WHOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Elvis has left the building! ~ Captain Steven Hiller
I hope you enjoyed the carnival. Please take a moment to subscribe to Live Real, Now.
Guest Post Author Bio: Miss T blogs at Prairie EcoThrifter. She grew up in the Canadian prairies and still lives there today. She is passionate about saving money, being healthy, looking out for our environment, and most of all having fun. Her blog shares tips on how you too can live a green, debt free, and fun life.
This week I am participating in a Yakezie blog swap where I am to answer the question ” Name a time when you splurged and were glad you did.” I had to seriously think about this for a minute and then it came to me. What do I consistently spend my money on that brings me the most enjoyment? Answer: Travel.
To say I love to travel would be an understatement. Travel for me is a life changing experience that I desire to re-live over and over again. I can think of a million reasons why I love to travel, but I thought I would boil it down to five.
1. Learn about myself. When I travel I gain a deeper understanding of myself and the world in general. Much of the experience is dependent on how different the environment is from what I am used to. When I traveled to Europe the first time, I got to try some different food and see how great it was to have a siesta in the middle of the day, but the transition was relatively painless. When I traveled to Central America last year for my honeymoon, I was a lot more out of my comfort zone. I was sleeping with tarantulas and geckos and trying food I couldn’t even pronounce. Plus, I couldn’t speak the language.
When I am in this kind of situation, I encounter things that I have never encountered before. I am forced to be on the alert because I don’t have any prior knowledge to rely on. Since everything is new, I am automatically forced to try to make sense of it all.
For many of us we have never really looked inside ourselves and examined what we are made of. When we are somewhere new, we have nowhere to hide. This is the point where you become really intimate with the ideas you have of yourself, of your ego, of life, which you may have been really identified to, and derived your sense of self from.
Your ego is essentially your self image; it’s the persona you display to society. Your ego survives only by constantly seeking approval from that which it wants to identify with. This is the society you are raised in. What happens when your family, friends, and your typical environment is not there to reinforce the ideas you have of your self? You ego becomes shaky; it starts to lose it’s hold on you. By traveling to the unknown, your ego falls apart and the true you is given the chance to emerge.
You begin to challenge and question everything you have ever believed. If you can be brave and not run away and use this as way to grow, you will see that all your beliefs belong to society and that they were never really yours to begin with. This can be extremely scary, liberating, nauseating and a million other things all at the same time.
I remember going through this very process when I traveled to Cuba. I knew intellectually that there were people in this world that weren’t as fortunate as me, but I was never able to fully understand that until I saw how some people lived in Cuba. I couldn’t help but reflect on what it would be like to never be able to own a home because the government owned everything and personal freedom didn’t exist. I wondered what it would be like to be so poor that I would have to walk around grimy city streets barefoot because I couldn’t afford shoes and it wouldn’t matter how many cuts I would get from broken glass because I had to get myself to work everyday on foot. That trip really shattered my ego and my mental models and when I arrived back home, I approached my own life very differently.
2. To do what I love. Interestingly, there are very few other areas of my life where I feel more at home and happy then when I am traveling. I really enjoy experiencing the unknown and all of the possibilities it has to offer. I guess I feel totally free; free from obligation and expectation. I am able to explore on my own terms and be who I want to be without negative consequences. When I am planning a trip, my excitement consumes me. I can’t help but wonder; what am I going to see? Who am I going to meet? What am I going to learn?
3. Re-live my youth. Unlike many of my peers, I skipped the university experience. When I graduated high school I went straight to working full time at my family’s business. It wasn’t until later in my life that I went back to university and got an education and got the job that I have now. I never had the opportunity to have 4 months off for 4 years and travel when I was younger. I was too focused on making money and buying my first house. I wanted to be an adult as fast I could.
Traveling now allows me to capture some of those stolen moments. The best thing is I have more money and resources behind me now so I can travel without incurring debt and causing financial strain which would have happened if I had done it in my younger days. I also have a partner to travel with, my husband, which allows us to grow and experience with each other by our side.
4. Redefine my boundaries. Being in a completely different environment than what I am used to excites me. I am somehow willing to try anything, regardless of what the consequences can be. When I was in Europe for the first time, I decided to try para-gliding in Austria. It was an amazing experience. However, if you would have asked me when I was still at home if it would run off of a mountain and free fall to the ground, I would probably have said “no way”. Being somewhere different allowed me to push my boundaries and cast my fears aside. Not only was it liberating and a ton of fun but it has made me push myself harder and further in other areas of my life which has only led to success.
5. Enhance my education. Learning through textbooks is not the same as learning hands on. I much prefer learning through experience. I find I never forget what I experience whereas I can forget what I have read.
Traveling allows me to enhance my education of the world around me through experience. I get to see first hand how something is made or used, or taste a food that I have never heard about before. I get to experience history by walking through castles and basilicas instead of reading about it or watching a documentary on TV. I get to discover the world for what it is first hand instead of through someone else’s eyes. I am able to learn about something honestly instead of through a tainted image painted by someone else.
The knowledge I have gained through my travels to date has enhanced my life and opportunities in so many ways. I have never learned something that hasn’t proven useful.
Travel isn’t cheap and to many is viewed as a luxury but to me it is something worth splurging on from one year to the next. The personal gains I get from my investment are invaluable!
The American Dream has been perverted. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness has been cruelly warped to mean
“Toys, free stuff provided at the expense of others, and the ability to buy and do anything I want without regard for the consequences.” To fund this horrible new dream, the people who can’t convince a government program to finance it for them often turn to credit. Credit is the art of putting your future into hock for something that you probably don’t need or want and that won’t work by the time you are finished making payments.
Ick. I’ve chosen not to live my life that way. Every day, more people are waking from the consumerism fog and deciding to reel their lifestyles back in and take control of their lives. They take a look at the world around them, compare it to their check register, and realize that it’s just not sustainable. You can’t survive on credit forever. Eventually, you will realize that there isn’t enough money to continue to buy things today on tomorrow’s paycheck.
What’s the first thing you should do when you decide that a “normal” life—a life in debt—isn’t the way you are going to live your life?
Well, when you find yourself standing in a grave, stop digging. You can’t dig yourself out of a hole and you can’t borrow your way out of debt. If you want to get out of debt, you need to stop using more debt. Period.
It may seem impossible, and the people around you may try to convince you that you are crazy. It is not impossible, just time-consuming. Short of finding an insane amount of money hiding under your front step or a winning lottery ticket blowing across the sidewalk, there are no shortcuts to getting out of debt. It’s just a matter of making the payments and not using more credit.
As far as the haters, screw ‘em. They are brainwashed into thinking their unsustainable and insane lifestyle is not only normal, but necessary. You don’t get life advice in a padded room, and you don’t plan your finances with a debt-addict.
Getting out of debt is a simple process, but that doesn’t make it easy. It only has two real steps: stop using debt, and keep making the payments.