What would your future-you have to say to you?
The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.
What would your future-you have to say to you?
When you accumulate a certain level of debt, it feels like you’re wading through an eyeball-deep pool of poo, dancing on your tiptoes just to keep breathing. Ask me how I really feel.
It shouldn’t be a surprise that I’m in debt. We have gone over this before. The story isn’t one of my proudest, so I’ve never talked much about how it happened.
Our debt was entirely our fault. We messed up and dug our own poo-pool. There were no major medical bills, no extended unemployment, just a strong consumer urge and an apparent need for instant gratification. Delayed gratification wasn’t a skill I’d considered learning. The idea of it was a thoroughly foreign concept. Why wait when every store we visited offered no payments/no interest for a year? We didn’t give much thought to what would happen when the year was up.
We got married young. We bought our house young. We started our family young. We did all of that over the course of two years, well before we were financially ready. Twenty years old, we had excellent credit and gave our credit reports a workout. Credit was so easy to get. By the time I was 22, we had a total credit limit more than twice our annual income. We fought so hard to keep up with the Joneses. A new pickup, a remodel on our house. Within a month of paying off the truck, I got a significant raise and rushed out to buy a new car.
Every penny that hit the table was caught in a net of lifestyle expansion. I was bouncing on my tiptoes.
Four months into my new car payment, I was laid off. There’s me, hoping for a snorkel. A week later, we found out our son was going to be a big brother. Our pool had developed a tide.
We killed the cable and cut back on everything else and…managed. Money was tight, but we got by. I got a new job, but had we learned any lessons? Of course not. We got a satellite dish, started shopping the way we always had. Times were good, and could never be bad. We had such short memories.
Fast forward a couple of years. Baby #3 is on the way while baby #2 is still in diapers. Daycare was about to double. Daddy started to panic. I built a rudimentary budget and realized there was no way to make ends meet. There just wasn’t enough cash coming in to cover expenses. That’s when I made my first frugal decision: I quit smoking. That cut the expenses right to the level of our income. It was tight, but doable.
There was still one serious problem. Neither one of us could control our impulse shopping. For a time, I was getting packages delivered almost every day. It was never anything expensive, but it was always something. Little things add up quickly.
Last spring, I realized we couldn’t keep going like that. I started looking into bankruptcy. Somehow, we managed to toss ourselves into the deep end of the pool. We had near-perfect credit and no way to maintain it.
While researching bankruptcy, I found our life preserver. We put together a budget. We cut and…it hurt. It’s taken a year, but every bill we have is finally being tracked. We have an emergency fund and we are working towards our savings goals. It hasn’t been an easy year, but we are making progress. We’ve eliminated 15% of our debt and opened out budget to include some “blow money” and an occasional date night. We are always looking for ways to decrease our bottom line and increase the top line. Most important, we are actually working together to keep all of our expenses under control, with no hurt feelings when we remind ourselves to stay on track.
We are finally standing flat-footed, head and shoulders above the poo.
Update: This post has been included in the Carnival of Personal Finance.
I once saw a sign on the wall in a junkyard that said, “Failure to plan on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.”
Another good one: “If everything is top priority, nothing is top priority.”
Once a week, I meet with my boss to discuss my progress for the previous week and my priorities for the coming week. This is supposed to make sure that my productivity stays in line with the company’s goals.
Great.
Once a day, my boss comes into my office to change my top priority based on whichever account manager has most recently asked for a status update for their customer.
Not so great.
At least twice a week, he asks for a status update on my highest priority items. Each time, he could mean the items we prioritized in the weekly meeting, or the items he chose to escalate later. Somehow, getting a new task escalated doesn’t deescalate an existing task.
Everything is a top priority.
To compensate, I’ve been working a few 12 hour days each week, and occasionally coming in on the weekends.
I’m dedicated and still behind.
Prioritizing is treated as an art, or in the case I just mentioned, a juggling act. It should be considered a science. It’s usually pretty simple.
That’s it. Too many times, we get hung up on urgent-but-not-important items and neglect the important things.
The hard part comes when it’s someone else setting your priorities, particularly when that person doesn’t rate things on urgency, importance, and cost but rather “Who has bitched the loudest recently?”
Can I tell my boss that I’m not going to do things the way he told me too? No. A former coworker very recently found out what happens when you do this.
Can I remind him that I’m busting my butt as hard as I can? Yes, but it will just earn me a request to come in on the weekend, too.
Can I ignore the official priorities part of the time, and work on what I feel is most important to keeping our customers happy? Yes, but it’s easy to go too far. “Boss, I ignored what you said, but this customer is happy, now!” won’t score me any points if it happens every week.
Priorities are simple, but not always easy. How do you balance your priorities?
First, my disclaimer: I’m not destitute.
However, I’m trying to spend Christmas acting like I am a pauper.
Why, with small children and beautiful-and-more-than-deserving wife, would I want to deprive my family of a bountiful holiday?
Before we get into the reasons for being a horrible grinch bent on depriving my children of their god-given right to rampant consumerism, let’s look at the Philosophy of Destitution.
The primary reason to pull back and tone it down is basic frugality. Excessive anything is not frugal. I am training my children–and for that matter, my wife and my self–in the finer arts of personal responsibility and frugality. Accumulating debt for a fleeting holiday is insane. If we can’t afford to buy it, we certainly can’t afford to give it. Anything else would be setting a bad example and children learn best by example.
Another piece of the Philosophy of Destitution(when I read this word, I hear a deep, booming voice in my head, like a 30s radio superhero voiceover) is “green”. I consider myself a conservationalist rather than an environmentalist, so don’t read too much into that color. I try to be responsible, instead of destructive and I try to avoid being wasteful. Toys that won’t be played with are wasteful. A garbage can full of packaging for those same toys costs money. It is much cheaper to avoid the landfill here.
Back to “Why”. Why would I be willing to deprive my family?
This is a continuation of the budget series. See these posts for the history of this series.
This time, I’m looking at our discretionary budget. These are the things that don’t have a fixed cost. Any individual item is largely optional, and, ultimately, we don’t track these purchases closely. At the beginning of the month, I pull this money out of the bank in cash, except for 1 category. When the discretionary budget is gone, it’s gone.
We’ve now addressed out entire budget, including what we can do and have done to keep our costs under control. Looking back, I don’t see too many cuts I’ve missed.
The idea of a credit card is appealing. You don’t have to have the money to pay for things; you can just use the card. It creates instant gratification and you start to get used to the idea of getting what you want when you want it. Unfortunately, this can be a disaster waiting to happen.
If you get in over your head and begin to negatively affect your credit rating, it is not the end of the world. By looking at things like bad credit credit cards at Money Supermarket you can start to make things right again. Watch out for these pitfalls that could cause you to stumble into a bad credit card situation.
Enticing Rewards
You see the commercial or advertisement online and reward credit cards make it seem like you will be drowning in points that can be redeemed for airline miles or gift cards. Initially, you may think that this is a great reason to sign up for a card. Then, you begin to use the card often in order to earn points.
The problem comes when you start spending just to get the rewards and you can’t or don’t make payments to return to a zero balance every month. You may end up with a hefty annual fee on top of everything else. Don’t let the temptation of getting a reward create a problem with your credit score.
Maxing Out the Credit Card
When someone hands you $5,000, you will be tempted to spend it. Why not enjoy the new money? The problem is that a $5,000 credit card balance needs to be paid back. Don’t fall into the trap of spending the entire line of credit immediately.
If you do run into some financial difficulty or you really need a credit card for something, you will have nothing left to use. If you go over the limit, you can be sure that there will be some fees that come along with it. Use it wisely. Charge something and pay it off.
Skipping a Payment or Paying Late
Once you have a credit card, everything is going to affect your credit score. If you miss a payment or pay late, you can be sure that this is going to show up against you. Aside from the damage to your credit score, most credit cards come with a substantial penalty in the form of a late fee that gets tacked onto the next payment.
Always pay on time. Pay in early if possible. Keeping up to date with your credit card will show up positively on your credit rating.
When Problems Arise
Even if you do your best to avoid these pitfalls, sometimes financial problems can be unavoidable. An unexpected emergency requires you to max out the card. You run into a problem at work and lose your main source of income.
If you see that your credit is starting to decline, it is always possible to build that score back up. Start over using bad credit credit cards to make a positive impact on your credit score. With this scenario, you get an opportunity to once again avoid these pitfalls and improve your credit.