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The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.

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Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.
Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?
Me: Yes?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: May I ask what that was for?
FMe: Of course.
Me: What was that for, jerk?
FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.
Me: What?!?  I’ve never even met you, before.
FMe: Of course you have.  I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.
Me: Huh?
FMe: Listen close.  You’re not  the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.
Me: ???
FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.
Me: I don’t appreciate….
FMe: Shut up.  I was dumb then, too.  Remember?  You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year.  On top of many other expensive decisions.  Do your recall?
Me: Yes, I do.  So what?
FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car.  Your kids wear new clothes.  You’ve got a house full of new furniture.  How did you pay for all of that?
Me: Naturally, I charged it.  Zero payments, zero interest for a year!  Pretty smart, huh?
FMe: What happens in a year?
Me: I don’t know.  I’ve got a full year to figure that out.
FMe: <Slap!>  I’ll tell you what happens!  Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed!   Your raise didn’t come through.  You had a baby. The truck broke down.  Your wife took maternity leave.  A roommate moved out.  You took a loss in the stock market.  You didn’t plan!  You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.
Me: How was I to know?
FMe: <Slap!>  Life happens!  You never know what is coming next.  You need to plan and save for what might happen.  Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly.  That is not acceptable.
Me:  So?  What are you going to do about it?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: Really?  Again?
FMe: <Slap!>  I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help.  Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux.  My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford.   You’ve screwed me, dude.
Me: I’m sorry.  What can I do to fix it?
FMe: Buy me dinner, first.
Me: Huh?!?!?
FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change.  No credit.
Me: None?
FMe: None.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.  Only spend what you can afford. Budget.  Pay off those nasty bills.  Don’t leave me hanging.
Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?
FMe: Exactly.  That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence.  Live in the real world.
Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me!  Now I know.
FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

 

Christmas for the Destitute

Finance, Parenting

First, my disclaimer:  I’m not destitute.

However, I’m trying to spend Christmas acting like I am a pauper.

Why, with small children and beautiful-and-more-than-deserving wife, would I want to deprive my family of a bountiful holiday?

Before we get into the reasons for being a horrible grinch bent on depriving my children of their god-given right to rampant consumerism, let’s look at the Philosophy of Destitution.

The primary reason to pull back and tone it down is basic frugality.  Excessive anything is not frugal. I am training my children–and for that matter, my wife and my self–in the finer arts of personal responsibility and frugality.   Accumulating debt for a fleeting holiday is insane.  If we can’t afford to buy it, we certainly can’t afford to give it.   Anything else would be setting a bad example and children learn best by example.

Another piece of the Philosophy of Destitution(when I read this word, I hear a deep, booming voice in my head, like a 30s radio superhero voiceover)  is “green”.    I consider myself a conservationalist rather than an environmentalist, so don’t read too much into that color.  I try to be responsible, instead of destructive and I try to avoid being wasteful.  Toys that won’t be played with are wasteful. A garbage can full of packaging for those same toys costs money.  It is much cheaper to avoid the landfill here.

Back to “Why”. Why would I be willing to deprive my family?

[Read more…] about Christmas for the Destitute

Best of Money Carnival #87, the Gold Rush Edition

Misc

1 oz (Troy ounce) of fine gold - detail
Image via Wikipedia

Welcome to the Best of Money Carnival #87, the Gold Rush Edition.

On January 24th, 1848, gold was discovered in Coloma, California by construction overseer James W. Marshall.  The following year, one hundred thousand people moved to California to either strike it rich, or profit from those who were trying to strike it rich.  The gold rush began 163 years ago today.

10. N.W. Journey presents Business use of Home Deduction posted at Networth Journey and says, “How to deduct your business home expenses.”

Some people recommend stockpiling gold so you’ll have something of value to spend after society as we know it collapses.   Does anyone know how to make change from a gold bar for a loaf of bread?

9. Darwin presents Present Value of Money Explained – MBA Monday posted at Darwin’s Money and says, “One of the most important financial concepts is also one of the most misunderstood. Make sure you understand the Present value of Money – with these real life examples. It will save you thousands!”

In 1854, a 195 pound gold nugget was found at Carson Hill in California.  It was valued at $43,534.   That would be worth $3,160,357.20 today.

8. RJ Weiss presents What Your Optimal Income? posted at Gen Y Wealth and says, “An exercise to find your optimal income level.”

Q: Which weighs more:  a pound of feathers, or a pound of gold? A: A pound of feathers.  Gold is weighed using Troy Weight, which only has 12 ounces per pound.

7. BWL presents How To Select A Financial Advisor posted at Christian Personal Finance and says, “Find out how to select the best financial adviser for you.”

Until the onset of modern electronics, which use gold because it doesn’t corrode or tarnish, gold had no practical value of its own.  Its entire value resided in the fact that it was pretty and relatively scarce.

6. Miss T presents 10 Ways to $ave Energy Comfortably | Prairie EcoThrifter.com posted at Prairie Eco-Thrifter and says, “How great is it to save money and the planet at the same time?!”

Q: Which weighs more:  a ounce of feathers, or a ounce of gold? A: A ounce of gold.  Troy Weight has fewer ounces that avoirdupois, but each ounce weighs more. There are 31.1 grams in a Troy ounce, but only 28.4 grams in a standard ounce.

5. Craig Ford presents Employers Look at Credit Reports | Ludicrous or Smart Business? posted at Money Help For Christians and says, “Should employers be able to see your credit report?”

Outside of collectible or government-issued coins, gold is priced according to it’s spot price, which fluctuates constantly.   Dealers will generally pay a percentage under spot when buying gold, then sell for a percentage over spot.  Always know the spot price of gold before you agree to buy or sell any.

4. MoneyNing presents Tax Time: Do I Have to Report that Income? posted at Money Ning and says, “Did you receive any income last year? Do you really have to report everything?”

Gold is the 58th most rare natural element, out of 92.

3. Silicon Valley Blogger presents I Just Lost My Job! How I’m Downsizing My Household Expenses posted at The Digerati Life and says, “I share my story of job loss and what ideas I have for paring down my expenses in order to cope with this loss of income. In the meantime, I’m doing what I can to find a new job!”

Only 20% of the gold from the Gold Rush deposits has been reclaimed.   The rest is still out there.

2. The Financial Blogger presents 5 Reasons Why You Need A Partner In Your Business posted at The Financial Blogger and says, “A post outlining the benefits of a business partner.”

As of the end of 2009, more than 160,000 tons of gold have been mined, most of which was done in the latter half of the 20th century.

And the winner is…

1. Amanda L Grossman presents Frugal Lessons from People Who Survived the Great Depression posted at Frugal Confessions – Frugal Living and says, “Have you ever met someone who was alive during the Great Depression? They are changed people. The Great Depression left a great impression on their thoughts, their styles, and their habits. I am fascinated by this time period, and researched the question of what frugal habits these people developed to survive.”

I’d like to thank everyone who participated.  Next week’s host is PT Money, so don’t forget to submit your entry!


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Money Problems: Day 12 – Paying for College by Doing Without

Finance

Today, I am continuing the  series, Money Problems: 30 Days to Perfect Finances.   The series will consist of 30 things you can do in one setting to perfect your finances.  It’s not a system to magically make your debt disappear.  Instead, it is a path to understanding where you are, where you want to be, and–most importantly–how to bridge the gap.

I’m not running the series in 30 consecutive days.  That’s not my schedule.  Also, I think that talking about the same thing for 30 days straight will bore both of us.   Instead, it will run roughly once a week.  To make sure you don’t miss a post, please take a moment to subscribe, either by email or rss.

On this, Day 11, we’re going to talk about one method of paying for college.

I have a secret to share.  Are you listening?  Lean in close: College is expensive.

You’re shocked, I can tell.

The fact is, college prices are rising entirely out of proportion to operation costs, salaries, or inflation.   The only thing college prices seem to be pegged to is demand.   Demand has gotten thoroughly out of whack.   The government forces down the interest rates on student loans, then adds some ridiculous forgiveness as long as you make payments for some arbitrary number of years, creating an artificial demand that wouldn’t be there if the iron fist of government weren’t forcing it into place.

Somebody in Washington has decided that the American dream consists of home ownership and a college education.  Everything is a failure.  He’s an idiot.

College isn’t for everybody.

Read that again.  Not everyone should go to college.  Not everyone can thrive in college.

Fewer than half of students who start college graduate.   The greater-than-half who drop out still have to repay their loans.  Do you think college was a good choice for them?

Then you get the people who major in art history and minor in philosophy.   Do you know what that degree qualifies you for?  Burger flipping.

Yes, I know.   Just having a degree qualifies you for a number of jobs.  It’s not  because the degree matters, it’s because HR departments set a series of fairly arbitrary requirements just to filter a 6 foot stack of resumes.   The only thing they care about is that having a degree proves that you were able to stick college out for 4 years.   That HR requirement matters less as time goes on and you develop relevant work experience.

A liberal arts education also—properly done—trains your mind in the skill of learning.   First, not everyone is capable of learning new things.  Second, not everyone is willing to learn new things.  Third, a passion for learning can be fed without college.  If you don’t have that passion, college won’t create it.  Most of the most learned people throughout history managed without college, or even formal education.   Even if you want to feed that passion in a formal classroom, you’re assuming the professors are interested in training your mind instead of indoctrinating it with their views.

Now there are some pursuits that outright require a college education.  The sciences like engineering, physics, astronomy, and psychiatry all require college.  You know what doesn’t require college?   Managing a cube farm.   Data entry.  Sales.   I’m not saying those are bad professions, but they can certainly be done without dropping $50,000 on college.

Some careers require an education, but don’t require a 4 year degree, like nursing(in most states), computer programming(it’s not required, but it makes it a lot easier to break into) and others.   Do you need to hit a 4 year school and get a Bachelor’s degree, or can you hold yourself to a 2 year program at a technical college and save yourself 40,000 or more?

That should be an easy choice.   Don’t go to college just because you think you should or because somebody said you should, or to get really drunk.   College isn’t for everybody and it’s possible it’s not for you.

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Toxic People

Business, Life

You should never be in the company of anyone with whom you would not want to die.

-Duncan Idaho, from God-Emperor of Dune

Some people suck the life out of everyone they encounter.   Whether it be through lies, unreasonable demands, emotional abuse or manipulation, or just a vile personalty, the people they meet are worse off for the encounter.   The people they interact with every day are screwed.

My time is too precious to waste any of it unnecessarily on people who remove value from it.   I like being with people who enrich my life, instead.

Unfortunately, since I’m not an advocate for the use of hitmen, not every toxic person is easy to eliminate from your life.

Toxic people come in 3 basic varieties:  professional, personal, and family.   There is some overlap between the categories.

The personal category is easiest to deal with.  These people aren’t relatives or coworkers, so you won’t see them at family gatherings or at work.     I’ve dealt with these people in two ways.

First, there is the direct approach.  One former friend, who was really only a friend when it was convenient for him(a pure leech), got told that he wasn’t invited to one of our parties because I was inviting his ex-wife, instead.    That was the last time he called me.

The second option is far more passive.   I set up a contact group in my phone called “Life’s too short”.   At first, I set it up with a fairly insulting ring tone, but I later switched it to no ring at all.   I don’t know they’ve called until I check my voicemail.   It’s far less direct, but also far easier than the direct approach.

Dealing with the toxic people in your family is more complicated.   You’ll see them at holiday gatherings, or hear about them during unrelated visits.   You probably have a lot of memories growing up with them, and may feel some level of obligation–deserved or not–to maintain contact.   It’s hard to break a tie that you’ve had your entire life.

Can you fix their behavior?  It’s worth trying to have a frank discussion about how they are treating you, or the things they are doing.    If the problem is that they are constantly bringing over their methhead boyfriends, banning the drug addicts from your home, while still welcoming the relative may be an acceptable fix.  If the problem is a constant need to belittle you, demanding they stop may work.   If the problem is a lifetime of emotional abuse, it probably isn’t fixable.

Is banishment an option?   Can you put that creepy cousin on the Life’s Too Short list?  You’ll still have to deal with him at family gatherings, but you can always leave the room when he comes in, right?   Don’t engage, don’t participate in any conversation beyond a polite greeting, and don’t offer any encouragement towards regular contact.

It’s possible that it won’t be possible to fix their behavior and that you won’t want to banish the offender.   If, for example, the offender is your mother (Not you, Mom!), you may feel a sense of obligation to maintain contact, or even be a primary caregiver at times.     This is a line nobody else can draw for you.   At some point, the current bad behavior could overwhelm the past obligations.   When that happens are you prepared for it?  That can be a traumatic break.

The other option, as cold as it sounds, is to wait it out.  Nature will take its course, eventually.   Can you wait that long, while maintaining your sanity and emotional equilibrium?

Professional toxic people include customers, vendors, and coworkers, none of whom are easy to get rid of.

If you own the business, you can fire your problem customers if the hassle outweighs the benefits you get from the relationship.   You can find a new vendor, and you can fire the problem employees.

What happens if you are an employee?

If the problem is your boss, your options are to suck it up, talk to his boss, or find a new job.   If the first is intolerable, and the second is impossible, it’s time to polish your resume.

If the problem is a vendor, you’ve got some options.   Document the problems, first.  Does he make inappropriate jokes, or badmouth you to your customers?  Then, research the alternatives.   Does one of his competitors offer an equivalent product or service?  Take the documentation and research to your boss, or whoever makes that decision, and see if you can get your company to make the switch.  The other option, is to request someone new to deal with at the vendor’s company, but that may not always be possible.

Finally, we come to the problem of toxic coworkers.

Some coworkers have the same problems as a toxic boss.  Is the company vice-president the boss’s baby brother?   You’re probably not going to find a win there.   You’ll have to suck it up or move on.

Is the problem person working in an unrelated department doing unrelated tasks?   It may be possible to start taking breaks at different times and leave him where he belongs: in the past.

Is the difficult individual sharing an office with you, demanding everything be done his way, and throwing daily tantrums?   This is the one that has to be dealt with.  He’s the one sucking the life out of you every single day.

First, start making use of a voice recorder.  If you’ve got a smartphone, you’ve probably already got one.  Otherwise, drop the $20 to buy one.   This lets you document the evil.   When his behavior goes hinky, record it.

Second, stand up for yourself.  If he’s making unreasonable demands, tell him it’s inappropriate.   He’s a bully, and bullies tend to back down when they are confronted.

Third, make sure the boss knows about the behavior.  Yes, this is tattling.  Get over it.  If he wasn’t acting like he was a spoiled 4 year old, you wouldn’t have to tell the boss that he was.   If the boss doesn’t know there’s a problem, he can’t deal with it.

Fourth, for any problem that isn’t directly aimed at you, ignore it.   If he makes a habit of throwing a tantrum because somebody emptied the coffee pot, or because the company switched health plans, let him.   Only get in the way if it’s directed at you.  Over time, the tantrums will get more noticeable and out of hand, forcing the boss to deal with it, preferably by handing him a pink slip.

Your goal is documentation, awareness, and avoidance.  Make the worst of it go elsewhere so you can be as productive as possible, document what you can, and let the boss become aware of the situation and how bad it has become.   And be patient. This isn’t an overnight fix.

How do you deal with the toxic people in your life?