- Working on my day off and watching Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. #
- Sushi-coma time. #
- To all the vets who have given their lives to make our way of life possible: Thank you. #
- RT @jeffrosecfp: While you're grilling out tomorrow, REMEMBER what the day is really for http://bit.ly/abE4ms #neverforget #
- Once again, taps and guns keep me from staying dry-eyed. #
- RT @bargainr: Live in an urban area & still use a Back Porch Compost Tumbler to fertilize your garden (via @diyNatural) http://bit.ly/9sQFCC #
- RT @Matt_SF: RT @thegoodhuman President Obama quietly lifted a brief ban on drilling in shallow water last week. http://bit.ly/caDELy #
- Thundercats is coming back! #
- In real life, vampires only sparkle when they are on fire. -Larry Correia #
- Wife found a kitten abandoned in a taped-shut box. Welcome Cat #5 #
Fighting Fair
This was a guest post on another site early last year.
Everyone, at times, has disagreements. How boring would life be if everyone agreed all of the time? How you handle those disagreements may mean disaster.
This is particularly true when you are arguing with your spouse. You spend most non-working moments with this one person, this wonderful, loving, infuriating person. Your emotions will naturally run high while discussing the things you care most about with the person you care most about. Arguments are not only natural, but inevitable.
How do you have an argument with someone you love without lasting resentment?
You have to argue fairly. There are a few principles to remember during an argument.
- When your partner is talking, your job is to listen with all of your energy. You are not interrupting. Your are not planning your rebuttal while waiting for your turn to talk. Your are listening, nothing else. If you don’t listen, you can’t understand. If you don’t understand, you can’t find a resolution.
- Remember that your partner cares. If she didn’t care, she wouldn’t feel so strongly about the argument. This isn’t a war, just an argument. She still wants to spend the rest of her life with you. Keeping this in mind will change the entire tone of the argument into a positive interaction. You will still disagree, but you will be looking for a solution together, instead of finding a “win” at any cost.
- Search for the best intent. Remember #2? There is an incredibly good chance that, if there are two ways to interpret something your partner has said–a good way and a bad way–your partner probably meant the good way. Even if you are wrong, it is far better to err on the side of resolution than the side of antagonism.
- When your partner has finished speaking, it’s still not your turn to argue. Your job now is to repeat your understanding of the issue, without worrying about problem-solving. Before you can refute the argument–or even establish your disagreement–you have to know that you understand her position and she has to know that you do. Without understanding, there can be no path to resolution that doesn’t cause resentment. If you have too much resentment, you won’t have a marriage.
After all of this, it will finally be your turn to make your point. Hopefully, your partner will be following the same rules so you can solve your problems together, without learning to hate each other.
Arguments in your marriage aren’t–or shouldn’t be–intended to draw blood. Fights happen. If your goal is to win at any cost, you will both lose, possibly everything.
This Year’s Richest Kids
For teenagers in Hollywood, life is good if you are one of the top paid actors in the industry. While some people work their entire lives to become financially stable and have a life of luxury and glamor, it comes young for these actors and can be a whirlwind of opportunity. Here is a list of some of the richest and most famed teenage celebrities of 2013.
Elle and Dakota Fanning
It’s hard to believe that Dakota Fanning is still in her teen years considering she’s been working in Hollywood for nearly a decade now. However the teen actress still continues to demand big bucks for the big roles that she plays. This helped pave the path for her little sister, Ellie, who has been in a handful of scary movies like “I Am Sam” and “Super 8”. Together the sister’s net worth is over $20 million. And while most of that is accredited to Dakota, Ellie is starting to pull her own weight as she becomes more popular.Willow and Jaden Smith
Another set of siblings makes the list with Willow and Jaden Smith. Granted these two have had a lot of help and opportunity from their Fresh Prince father, but they are sure to keep the ball rolling on their own. The two have both already made their debut on the big screen, have had popular top-radio songs, and continue to diversify with their ventures. With the knowledge they get from their father, the Smith siblings are sure to continue to rack in the paychecks for the remainder of their teen years and beyond.Angus T. Jones
Everyone’s favorite “half-man” from the TV series Two And A Half Men makes the list of highest paid teens, even after he left the TV show in 2013. In 2010, Jones became the highest paid child actor at the ripe age of 17, as he penned a contracted that would earn him nearly $8 million over two years of work. No longer apart of the show, Angus T. Jones looks to find another break that will continue the success he found at such a young age.
It’s hard to believe that Dakota Fanning is still in her teen years considering she’s been working in Hollywood for nearly a decade now. However the teen actress still continues to demand big bucks for the big roles that she plays. This helped pave the path for her little sister, Ellie, who has been in a handful of scary movies like “I Am Sam” and “Super 8”. Together the sister’s net worth is over $20 million. And while most of that is accredited to Dakota, Ellie is starting to pull her own weight as she becomes more popular.Willow and Jaden Smith
Another set of siblings makes the list with Willow and Jaden Smith. Granted these two have had a lot of help and opportunity from their Fresh Prince father, but they are sure to keep the ball rolling on their own. The two have both already made their debut on the big screen, have had popular top-radio songs, and continue to diversify with their ventures. With the knowledge they get from their father, the Smith siblings are sure to continue to rack in the paychecks for the remainder of their teen years and beyond.Angus T. Jones
Everyone’s favorite “half-man” from the TV series Two And A Half Men makes the list of highest paid teens, even after he left the TV show in 2013. In 2010, Jones became the highest paid child actor at the ripe age of 17, as he penned a contracted that would earn him nearly $8 million over two years of work. No longer apart of the show, Angus T. Jones looks to find another break that will continue the success he found at such a young age.
Selena Gomez
The last year and a half has been huge for the former Disney Star. While some actors and actresses have a hard time shedding the Disney persona, Gomez has now branched out to more mature film roles and has become a legitimate player in the music industry as well, picking up Choice Break-Up Song and the Choice Music Star and the Choice Hottie Teen Choice awards. As her fame continues to grow, she also works closely with UNICEF and other non-profit organizations, proving that it doesn’t matter how much money you have, you can always do the right thing.
Miley Cyrus
This is the last year that Miley will be able to make the list of wealthy teens, but she is sure to continue to rack in the paychecks even as she enters her 20’s and beyond. A dual threat in singing and acting, she’s another Disney star that has shed the child–star persona and has developed her own new edgy look and identity. And even though she may no longer be the innocent Hanna Montana that she once was, she still keeps her fans entertained and interested with everything she works on. She picked up three Teen Choice Awards this year.
Justin Bieber
You better believe that the Beebs is on this list. Possibly the most loved/hated teenager in Hollywood, Justin Bieber continues to rake in the money that his ‘Beliebers’ shell out to see him in concert, listen to his music and buy his merchandise. You may love him, you may hate him, but either way he’s probably making more money than you and he’s having a great time doing it.
Some teens stars make more money in a year than majority of people will make in their entire lifetimes. This affords them opportunities of a lifetime to enjoy things other people only dream of. But as quickly as they become part of the limelight, new faces appear and take their place. These are some of the hottest faces of 2013, but who will be here next year?
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Why I Hate Payday Loans
I hate payday loans and payday lenders.
The way a way a payday loan works is that you go into a payday lender and you sign a check for the amount you want to borrow, plus their fee. They give you money that you don’t have to pay back until payday. It’s generally a two-week loan.
Now, this two week loan comes with a fee, so if you want to borrow $100, they’ll charge you a $25 fee, plus a percent of the total loan, so for that $100 loan, you’ll have to pay back $128.28.
That’s only 28% of actual interest; that’s not terrible. However, if you prorate that to figure the APR, which is what everyone means when they say “I’ve got a 7% interest rate”, it comes out to 737%. That’s nuts.
They are a very bad financial plan.
Those loans may save you from an overdraft fee, but they’ll cost almost as much as an overdraft fee, and the way they are rigged–with high fees, due on payday–you’re more likely to need another one soon. They are structured to keep you from ever getting out from under the payday loan cycle.
For those reasons, I consider payday loan companies to be slimy. Look at any of their sites. Almost none are upfront about the total cost of the loan.
So I don’t take their ads. When an advertiser contacts me, my rate sheet says very clealy that I will not take payday loan ads. The reason for that is–in my mind–when I accept an advertiser, I am–in some form–endorsing that company, or at least, I am agreeing that they are a legitimate business and I am helping them conduct that business.
In all of the time I’ve been taking ads, I’ve made exactly one exception to that rule. On the front page of that advertiser’s website, they had the prorated APR in bright, bold red letters. It was still a really bad deal, but with that level of disclosure, I felt comfortable that nobody would click through and sign up without knowing what they were getting into. That was a payday lender with integrity, as oxymoronic as that sounds.
Huh?
Am I the only one who just noticed that it’s Wednesday? The holiday week with the free day is completely screwing me up.
Just to make this a relevant post:
Spend less!
Save more!
Invest!
Wee!
Delayed Gratification, Take II
How much would you pay for a kiss from the world’s sexiest celebrity?
That was the focus of a recent study that I can’t find today. There is no celebrity waiting in the wings to deliver the drool, and the study doesn’t name which celebrity it is. That’s an exercise for the reader.
This was a study into how we value nice things.
The fascinating part of the study is that people would be willing to pay more to get the kiss in 3 days than they would to get the tongue slipped immediately.
Anticipation adds value.
Instant gratification actually causes us to devalue the object of our desire.
This goes well beyond “Will you respect me in the morning?”
The last time I talked about delayed gratification, it was in the context of my kids. That still holds true. Kids don’t value the things that are handed to them.
The surprising–and disturbing–bit is that adults don’t, either. If I run out to the store to buy an iPad the first day I see one, I won’t care about it nearly as much as if I spend a week or two agonizing over the decision.
The delay alone adds to the perceived value. The agony turns the perceived value into gold.
If I spend a month searching for the perfect car, the thrill of the successful hunt adds less value than the time it took to do the hunting.
Here’s my frugal tip for today: Delay your purchases. While it may not actually save you any money, you will feel like you got a much better deal if you wait a few days for something you really want.
