- RT @kristinbrianne: You won't believe it… I just entered to win the #KodakSweeps on http://tweetphoto.com/contest Pls RT #
- RT @wilw The single most insulting thing you can tell a creative person is, upon viewing their creation, "you have too much free time." #
- Hmm. I share a birthday with Linus Torvalds. #
- @freefrombroke I'm following you and would love to be followed back. in reply to freefrombroke #
- RT: @SuburbanDollar: New Post: : The Art of Delayed Gratification http://bit.ly/5gsKXy #
- RT @FrugalYankee: #NEWYear's #QUOTE: All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening. ~ Alexander Woollcott #
- Crackberry is certainly accurate. I may be too connected. #
- MIL thinks a Kitchenaid stand mixer will make it easier to remove the snow in the driveway. Bad logic, but she's buying one for us, anyway. #
- What magic is in a saw-palmetto capsule and why does my prostate need the power of 1000 of them? #
- RT: @SuburbanDollar: Sounds like he's asking you to rent him a date. #
- RT @hughdeburgh: "I'd rather die fighting for freedom than live as a slave." ~ Judge Andrew Napolitano #Iran #in2010 #USA #
- Happy New Year, 3 minutes early. #
- Billy Jack vs Chuck Norris. Winner? #
- Getting my hair brushed by an 18 month old while watching Married With Children. It's a good evening. #
- RT @FrugalYankee: #NEWYEARS #QUOTE: The most important political office is that of private citizen. ~ Louis Brandeis #
- RT @ScottATaylor: 40,697 Laws Take Effect Today http://ff.im/-dFXNR #
- 5AM. It'd be so easy to go right back to sleep. #
Experiences v. Stuff
- Image by hunterseakerhk via Flickr
On Friday, I went to see Evil Dead: The Musical with some friends. The play obviously isn’t a good match for everyone, but we are all horror movie fans, I’m a Bruce Campbell fan, and all of us had seen and enjoyed at least Army of Darkness. It was a good fit for us.
The play, followed by a late dinner and drinks with people I care about, was easily the most money my wife and I have spent on a night out in years. That’s including an overnight trip for my cousin’s wedding.
Now, several days later, I keep thinking about that night, but not with regret about the price. I keep thinking about the fun I had with my wife and some of our closest friends. We saw a great play that had us in stitches. We had a few hours of good conversation. We had a good time. I would happily do it all over again. In fact, I would happily reorganize our budget to make something similar happen every month.
I don’t remember the last time I spent 3 or 4 days happily thinking about something I bought.
I look around my house at the years of accumulated crap we own and I see a big rock tied around my neck. Even after a major purge this spring, we’ve got more stuff than we can effectively store, let alone use. When something new comes in the house, we spend days discussing whether we really need it or if it should get returned. When we plan a big purchase, we debate it, sometimes for weeks.
Getting stuff is all about stress.
My wife and I are both familiar with the addictive endorphin rush that comes with some forms of shopping. I wish the rational recognition of a shopping addiction was enough to make it go away. Buying stuff makes us feel good for a few minutes, while high-quality experiences make us feel good for days or weeks, and gives us things to talk about for years to come.
It’s really not a fair competition between experiences and stuff. Experiences are the hands-down winner for where we should be spending our money.
Why then, does stuff always seem to come out ahead when it comes to where our money actually goes?
How to make Forex spread betting accessible to you
Easy to start and accessible, spread betting UK wide has grown in popularity. Forex spread betting in particular has attracted interest from traders all over the country, since it is a leveraged (or margined) product, which means that you are only required to deposit a small percentage of the full value of your position to place a forex trade. This means that the potential for profit, or loss, from an initial capital outlay is significantly higher than in traditional trading. They can go either long or short on their chosen currencies and can trade across a number of currency pairs. While Forex spread betting can be exciting, for newcomers, there are a few things to do before commencing trading. With advice from experts such as City Index, there is a possibility of being a successful trader.
The first thing any new trader should do is research their market. A combination of technical and fundamental analysis usually works: some traders follow one more than the other, as it works better for them. Over time, you’ll find which research style works for you, while doing so before each trade will help you when looking at each currency pair.
Creating a clear, easy-to-follow spread betting plan is vital. Doing so will prepare you for each trade you make, while simultaneously eliminating any indecision you may have in the event of not having a plan. When trading, it’s also important to make use of the many risk management tools at your disposal. They mean that any potential losses are limited to a pre-set level.
Tying in with any research you do, following the news constantly is imperative. Monitoring any stories which will have a direct impact on the market you’re spread betting on, and looking at the live market regularly is especially important with Forex spread betting.
For beginners in Forex spread betting, there are plenty of resources available online for anyone with an interest in getting into it. Websites of companies like City Index have everything you need to help get you started.
Mortgage Race
I spent last week at the Financial Blogger Conference. Saturday night was the big debauch, a 90s themed hip-hop dance party.
Yeah.
Instead, Crystal, Suba, and I hosted a super-secret pizza party to let some of the less “dance party” inclined attendees discuss things like the sanitary concerns of group body shots, sex toys, and horror movies.
During the course of the party, Crystal and I decided to race to pay off our mortgages.
Her balance is just under $25,000.
My balance is $26,266.40.
We both technically have the cash to pay off the balances right now, but we are both dealing with secondary housing issues. She’s building a new one, and I’m updating an inherited house. Neither of us is willing to use our cash reserves to pay off the balance right this moment.
Now that my credit card is paid off, I’ve moved that money to an extra interest-only payment on my mortgage, effectively doubling my mortgage payment, which puts my projected payoff date as about the end of next year. Crystal’s aiming for June, so I’ll have to hurry.
We do have tenants lined up for February, and all of the non-expense related rent will go to the mortgage.
I think I can win.
Update:
I forgot to mention the terms of the bet. The loser has to go visit the winner. When I win, Crystal’s going to fly to Minnesota to experience snow.
Sammy’s Story, Part 4
If you haven’t been following along with Sammy’s story, please take a few minutes to do so here, here, and here.
We left off in September, with the yard done and the house almost ready to rent. Sammy and his guys worked their butts off getting the work done. It cost more than we had expected, but it got done.
Over the winter, we hired the crew to handle the snow at both of our properties. We paid Sammy a flat fee and he made sure the driveways and sidewalks were clear every time it snowed. We started paying him in November, and ran through until March, so he got a pretty good deal and we didn’t have to worry about the snow.
When spring came, Sammy told me he needed to take a break from his business. Putting a yard care business on hold when spring hits is a bad idea, but it happened. He was dealing with some problems with his housing and couldn’t focus on anything else, even though the money would have helped him a lot.
When he lost his apartment, we let him store some of his things in the extra garage stall at the rental. This stall was reserved in the lease for us to use, and was the base of operations for the yard care business, since he was using our lawn mower and snow blower anyway.
And that was the last we saw of him for a month.
When we started nagging him to take care of his stuff, he kept telling us that he wanted to keep his business going, but he couldn’t, yet.
Then he’d leave his stuff for another month.
By the end of the summer, he’d gotten most of his stuff out and we’d only hear from him if he thought he could borrow money from us, which didn’t happen.
Finally, my wife called him and told him to get his crap out by the end of September.
Or else.
A week into October, we found out that he’d spent September in jail. Supposedly, he broke up with his(literal) crackhead girlfriend and she called the police and made up stories. He got arrested and couldn’t make bail.
Last week, he came to borrow our trailer to get the last of his stuff out, then returned it in the evening without moving any of his stuff. He said he was moving the stuff he had stored elsewhere and he’d be back on Monday.
Monday? Nothing.
Our relationship with Sammy has gone from helping him launch a business that helps fatherless teens, recovering crackheads, and the homeless to lies and getting begged for money.
My wife is ready to put his stuff on the curb.
What would you do? Toss his stuff? Give him another chance?
Bribes vs Rewards
What’s the difference between a bribe and a reward? It’s a question that has been heavily on my mind lately. As a father of three–1, 3 and 10–motivating children occupies a lot of my thoughts. Is it possible to motivate a child and reward good behavior without resorting to a bribe?
First, let’s look at the definitions:
bribe n.
1. Something, such as money or a favor, offered or given to a person in a position of trust to influence that person’s views or conduct.
2. Something serving to influence or persuade.
re·ward n.
1. Something given or received in recompense for worthy behavior or in retribution for evil acts.
2. Money offered or given for some special service, such as the return of a lost article or the capture of a criminal.
3. A satisfying return or result; profit.
4. Psychology: The return for performance of a desired behavior; positive reinforcement.
In my mind, a reward is given either as a goal for planned activity or a surprise for good behavior. When used for surprises, it should never be common enough to be expected. If a child is only behaving because she is expecting a reward, it is bribed behavior. She should always be surprised to get the reward.
Using a reward for goal setting is no different than collecting a paycheck. Is my company bribing me to do the work I do every day? They plan to reward or compensate me for the work I plan to do for them. While that my be blurring the line between compensation and rewards, it is valid. My future paycheck is the motivation for my current work.
Bribes, on the other hand, are reward for bad behavior. If my three-year-old is throwing a tantrum in the grocery store and I promise her candy to stop, I have just taught her that the “reward” for a public tantrum is candy. This is reinforcing negative behavior, which will only escalate in the future. If a temper tantrum earns a candy bar, what will she get for hitting Mommy with a frying pan?
The line is further blurred by preemptive bribes. If I tell my children there will be candy when we get home if they behave in the store, it’s still a bribe. Promising dessert if my son cleans his room is a bribe.
So what is the difference?
Bribes reward negative behavior. Whether that is actual behavior or anticipated behavior, bribes provide a reward for it. If you use a treat to end or preempt bad actions, you are bribing your child.
Rewards celebrate positive behavior. A promised treat for going beyond expectations or a surprise for excellent behavior is a reward. It should never become common, or the child will discover that withholding the positive behavior will generate promises of larger rewards. The goal is to reinforce the good to encourage positive behaviors even when there is no likelihood for reward.
For example, my son’s school is part of a reading contest. Over a two month period, if the students read 500 pages outside of school, they will get tickets to a basketball game. If they are in the top three for pages read, they will get personalize jerseys and on-court recognition. My son did the math and was reading enough to surpass the 500 page goal, but not enough to get into the top three. I offered a prize if he made it to 2500 pages. In my opinion, that’s a reward. He was already going beyond the requirement. I have provided motivation to push himself beyond what he thinks he can do. That’s positive reinforcement of good behavior.
On the other hand, when my eight-year-old was refusing to eat dinner, we offered a cookie for dessert if she ate well. That’s reinforcing negative behavior by giving a reward for misbehaving. A bribe.
Rewards are positive responses to positive behavior to motivate future good behavior. Bribes are rewards for negative behavior, real or anticipated, that only serve to encourage more bad behavior in the future.
