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Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.
Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?
Me: Yes?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: May I ask what that was for?
FMe: Of course.
Me: What was that for, jerk?
FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.
Me: What?!?  I’ve never even met you, before.
FMe: Of course you have.  I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.
Me: Huh?
FMe: Listen close.  You’re not  the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.
Me: ???
FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.
Me: I don’t appreciate….
FMe: Shut up.  I was dumb then, too.  Remember?  You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year.  On top of many other expensive decisions.  Do your recall?
Me: Yes, I do.  So what?
FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car.  Your kids wear new clothes.  You’ve got a house full of new furniture.  How did you pay for all of that?
Me: Naturally, I charged it.  Zero payments, zero interest for a year!  Pretty smart, huh?
FMe: What happens in a year?
Me: I don’t know.  I’ve got a full year to figure that out.
FMe: <Slap!>  I’ll tell you what happens!  Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed!   Your raise didn’t come through.  You had a baby. The truck broke down.  Your wife took maternity leave.  A roommate moved out.  You took a loss in the stock market.  You didn’t plan!  You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.
Me: How was I to know?
FMe: <Slap!>  Life happens!  You never know what is coming next.  You need to plan and save for what might happen.  Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly.  That is not acceptable.
Me:  So?  What are you going to do about it?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: Really?  Again?
FMe: <Slap!>  I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help.  Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux.  My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford.   You’ve screwed me, dude.
Me: I’m sorry.  What can I do to fix it?
FMe: Buy me dinner, first.
Me: Huh?!?!?
FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change.  No credit.
Me: None?
FMe: None.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.  Only spend what you can afford. Budget.  Pay off those nasty bills.  Don’t leave me hanging.
Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?
FMe: Exactly.  That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence.  Live in the real world.
Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me!  Now I know.
FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

 

Fall From Grace

Finance

When you accumulate a certain level of debt, it feels like you’re wading through an eyeball-deep pool of poo, dancing on your tiptoes just to keep breathing.   Ask me how I really feel.Tip Toe

It shouldn’t be a surprise that I’m in debt.  We have gone over this before.   The story isn’t one of my proudest, so I’ve never talked much about how it happened.

Our debt was entirely our fault.  We messed up and dug our own poo-pool.   There were no major medical bills, no extended unemployment, just a strong consumer urge and an apparent need for instant gratification.  Delayed gratification wasn’t a skill I’d considered learning.  The idea of it was a thoroughly foreign concept.   Why wait when every store we visited offered no payments/no interest for a year?   We didn’t give much thought to what would happen when the year was up.

We got married young.   We bought our house young.  We started our family young.   We did all of that over the course of two years, well before we were financially ready.   Twenty years old, we had excellent credit and gave our credit reports a workout.   Credit was so easy to get.    By the time I was 22, we had a total credit limit more than twice our annual income.  We fought so hard to keep up with the Joneses.   A new pickup, a remodel on our house.   Within a month of paying off the truck, I got a significant raise and rushed out to buy a new car.

Every penny that hit the table was caught in a net of lifestyle expansion.   I was bouncing on my tiptoes.

Four months into my new car payment, I was laid off.  There’s me, hoping for a snorkel.  A week later, we found out our son was going to be a big brother.   Our pool had developed a tide.

We killed the cable and cut back on everything else and…managed.   Money was tight, but we got by.  I got a new job, but had we learned any lessons?  Of course not.   We got a satellite dish, started shopping the way we always had.  Times were good, and could never be bad.  We had such short memories.

Fast forward a couple of years.   Baby #3 is on the way while baby #2 is still in diapers.   Daycare was about to double.  Daddy started to panic.   I built a rudimentary budget and realized there was no way to make ends meet.   There just wasn’t enough cash coming in to cover expenses.   That’s when I made my first frugal decision:  I quit smoking.  That cut the expenses right to the level of our income.  It was tight, but doable.

There was still one serious problem.    Neither one of us could control our impulse shopping.   For a time, I was getting packages delivered almost every day.  It was never anything expensive, but it was always something.  Little things add up quickly.

Last spring, I realized we couldn’t keep going like that.   I started looking into bankruptcy.   Somehow, we managed to toss ourselves into the deep end of the pool.  We had near-perfect credit and no way to maintain it.

While researching bankruptcy, I found our life preserver.   We put together a budget.   We cut and…it hurt.     It’s taken a year, but every bill we have is finally being tracked.   We have an emergency fund and we are working towards our savings goals.    It hasn’t been an easy year, but we are making progress.    We’ve eliminated 15% of our debt and opened out budget to include some “blow money” and an occasional date night.   We are always looking for ways to decrease our bottom line and increase the top line.   Most important, we are actually working together to keep all of our expenses under control, with no hurt feelings when we remind ourselves to stay on track.

We are finally standing flat-footed, head and shoulders above the poo.

Update:  This post has been included in the Carnival of Personal Finance.

Totally Money Carnival #5, the Superbowl Edition

Misc

Welcome to the Totally Money Carnival #5, the Superbowl Edition.  It’s my privilege to be the first outside host for this carnival.

I don’t watch the Superbowl. I’ve never been into spectator sports unless I have some skin in the game. If I’m playing, or have some money riding on the outcome, I’m watching. Other than that, I’ll usually pass. Yesterday, a bunch of grown men in tights earning envy-inducing amounts of money ran around for a few hours in front of people, some of whom paid 5 figures for the privilege of watching. Yay!

Editor’s Picks

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpjaOUjUPUc

Mike Piper presents Protecting Your Private Files posted at Oblivious Investor, “How can you keep your sensitive documents (scanned tax returns, for instance) both backed up and protected in the event of computer theft?”  Ed.  I love this solution, and I use it.  All of my tax returns, online receipts, and documents I don’t want to lose get treated this way.

Suzanne K. presents The Psychology of Why You Can’t Budget—And Five Tips to Help You Do It posted at PsychologyDegree.net.  Ed.  I’ve always been a fan of trying to understand what makes people tick.

Silicon Valley Blogger presents Prepare Your Tax Return: Tax Products vs Tax Pros posted at The Digerati Life, saying “If you don’t enjoy preparing your taxes, you’re not alone. There are various ways to get your tax returns done. How do you go about preparing your taxes: DIY or with the help of a pro?” Ed.  Tax time sucks.  If we abolished payroll deductions and made everybody in the country write a check to the IRS every year, there would be a revolt on the next April 15th.

Kevin McKee presents How To Know if Your Job is Expendable posted at Thousandaire, saying “When businesses start doing poorly, some people are at risk of losing their job, while others are safe. Find out which category you fall in with these simple questions.”  Ed: I was given a demonstration that defines expendability in the workplace. Fill a glass with water and place it on the counter in front of you. Stick your finger in the glass. Now, pull it out. See the impression you’ve made? I’ve done the rockstar bit, and I’ve been in positions that were necessary for the profitability of larger divisions of large companies. It doesn’t matter. Corporate loyalty is a joke.

Budgeting

35% of people who attend the game write it off as a corporate expense. (source)

Miss T presents 5 Ways to Lower Your Monthly Bills | Prairie EcoThrifter.com posted at Prairie Eco-Thrifter, saying “Believe it or not, there are lots of ways to save money, no matter how much of it you have- or don’t have.”

Credit

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jRYLhkOV2so

Tim Chen presents Pentagon Federal Offers Best Gas & Airfare Credit Card Rewards, Period. posted at NerdWallet Blog – Credit Card Watch, saying “There is only one credit card in America that offers no strings attached 5% cash back at any gas stations (excluding the likes of Costco) – the Pentagon Federal Platinum CashBack. It also gets you 2% back at grocery stores.”

Miranda presents Accelerate Your Credit Card Debt Pay Down posted at CreditScore.net, saying “Use these techniques to pay down your credit card debt faster.”

Buck Inspire presents Moving Up and On From Prepaid Debit Cards posted at Buck Inspire.

Ryan Hudson presents How I Got a Credit Card Late Fee Waived posted at Best Credit Cards IQ, saying “Don’t take accidental late fees laying down. Do something about it. Here’s how I got rid of my late fee.”

Debt

No network footage exists of Super Bowl I. It was taped over, supposedly for a soap opera.(source)

John presents Get Out of Debt Fast – How to Speed Up the Process posted at Passive Family Income, saying “There are quite a few people today that are beginning to dig their way out of debt. They have monitored their spending, created a budget, and have done the best that they can to stick with it. But, as many of you have experienced, the excitement of becoming debt-free gets pretty old after a while.”

Finance

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRDx18GYITw

Mike Collins presents Defined Benefit vs Defined Contribution posted at Saving Money Today, saying “Understanding the different types of retirement plans.”

Boomer presents 10 Ways For Women To Obtain Financial Empowerment posted at Boomer & Echo, “It’s not that difficult to get your financial life under control (your control). Remember, a man is not a financial plan.”

Frugality

The Super Bowl is measured in Roman numerals because a football season runs the span over two calendar years. This year the season began in 2010 and ends in 2011. (source)

Madison DuPaix presents Substitute, Improvise, and Make Do With What You Have posted at My Dollar Plan, saying “So often, when we run out of things we need, we run to buy something or spend money when we don’t have to. Find out how you can avoid this trap.”

Money Beagle presents The Power Of The Free Calendar posted at Money Beagle.

Amanda L Grossman presents Homemade Diversion Safes: Save Money by Making Your Own posted at Frugal Confessions – Frugal Living, saying “You can purchase your own home security money safes (diversion safes), but I thought it would be more frugal and fun to think of ones to make on your own. See what I can do with a used deodorant!”

Money Management

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KQkK1UCH1EU

MoneyNing presents What Would You Do with a Million Dollars? posted at Money Ning, saying “I know what I would do with a million dollars. How about you?”

Other

More drivers are involved in alcohol-related accidents on Super Bowl Sunday than any other day of the year (except St. Patrick’s Day), according to the Insurance Information Institute. (source)

Joe Morgan presents Is Gen Y Irresponsible, Or Is It A Matter Of Perspective? posted at Simple Debt-Free Finance, saying “Generation Y has a reputation for having a sense of entitlement, but here’s one reason it may just be a matter or perspective.”

Saving

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_78ylMLa0JQ

Ryan @ MFN presents Roth IRA Qualifications posted at The Military Wallet, saying “Are you qualified to open a Roth IRA? Find out income and contribution requirements to see if you are eligible!”

Brian @ BeBetterNow presents Money’s Golden Rule: Spend Less Than You Earn posted at Be Better Now, “In the end, most personal finance advice boils down to spending less than you earn. Here’s another article to reinforce that.”

Spending

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g364TG_8Qmw

Barb Friedberg presents Wealth in Life: 25 Cheap Ideas for Fun posted at Barbara Friedberg Personal Finance, “Join in to build a massive list of low cost fun!”

Taxes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R55e-uHQna0

PT presents Tax on Unemployment Compensation posted at PT Money, saying “A detailed look at what taxes are due on your unemployment compensation.”

Ken presents Important Tax Update for 2010 You Don’t Want To Miss posted at Spruce Up Your Finances, saying “A few of the tax provisions applicable to tax year 2010 such as the extension of tax filing date, expanded tax benefits, phase out on some limitations, etc.”

Fanny presents Top 10 Tax Deductions for Parents posted at Living Richly on a Budget, “Being a parent is one of the most important roles in life. Why not take advantage of all the deductions you qualify for?”

Thank you all for participating!  Next week’s host is Saving Money Today, so be sure to submit your posts.

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Best of Money Carnival #87, the Gold Rush Edition

Misc

1 oz (Troy ounce) of fine gold - detail
Image via Wikipedia

Welcome to the Best of Money Carnival #87, the Gold Rush Edition.

On January 24th, 1848, gold was discovered in Coloma, California by construction overseer James W. Marshall.  The following year, one hundred thousand people moved to California to either strike it rich, or profit from those who were trying to strike it rich.  The gold rush began 163 years ago today.

10. N.W. Journey presents Business use of Home Deduction posted at Networth Journey and says, “How to deduct your business home expenses.”

Some people recommend stockpiling gold so you’ll have something of value to spend after society as we know it collapses.   Does anyone know how to make change from a gold bar for a loaf of bread?

9. Darwin presents Present Value of Money Explained – MBA Monday posted at Darwin’s Money and says, “One of the most important financial concepts is also one of the most misunderstood. Make sure you understand the Present value of Money – with these real life examples. It will save you thousands!”

In 1854, a 195 pound gold nugget was found at Carson Hill in California.  It was valued at $43,534.   That would be worth $3,160,357.20 today.

8. RJ Weiss presents What Your Optimal Income? posted at Gen Y Wealth and says, “An exercise to find your optimal income level.”

Q: Which weighs more:  a pound of feathers, or a pound of gold? A: A pound of feathers.  Gold is weighed using Troy Weight, which only has 12 ounces per pound.

7. BWL presents How To Select A Financial Advisor posted at Christian Personal Finance and says, “Find out how to select the best financial adviser for you.”

Until the onset of modern electronics, which use gold because it doesn’t corrode or tarnish, gold had no practical value of its own.  Its entire value resided in the fact that it was pretty and relatively scarce.

6. Miss T presents 10 Ways to $ave Energy Comfortably | Prairie EcoThrifter.com posted at Prairie Eco-Thrifter and says, “How great is it to save money and the planet at the same time?!”

Q: Which weighs more:  a ounce of feathers, or a ounce of gold? A: A ounce of gold.  Troy Weight has fewer ounces that avoirdupois, but each ounce weighs more. There are 31.1 grams in a Troy ounce, but only 28.4 grams in a standard ounce.

5. Craig Ford presents Employers Look at Credit Reports | Ludicrous or Smart Business? posted at Money Help For Christians and says, “Should employers be able to see your credit report?”

Outside of collectible or government-issued coins, gold is priced according to it’s spot price, which fluctuates constantly.   Dealers will generally pay a percentage under spot when buying gold, then sell for a percentage over spot.  Always know the spot price of gold before you agree to buy or sell any.

4. MoneyNing presents Tax Time: Do I Have to Report that Income? posted at Money Ning and says, “Did you receive any income last year? Do you really have to report everything?”

Gold is the 58th most rare natural element, out of 92.

3. Silicon Valley Blogger presents I Just Lost My Job! How I’m Downsizing My Household Expenses posted at The Digerati Life and says, “I share my story of job loss and what ideas I have for paring down my expenses in order to cope with this loss of income. In the meantime, I’m doing what I can to find a new job!”

Only 20% of the gold from the Gold Rush deposits has been reclaimed.   The rest is still out there.

2. The Financial Blogger presents 5 Reasons Why You Need A Partner In Your Business posted at The Financial Blogger and says, “A post outlining the benefits of a business partner.”

As of the end of 2009, more than 160,000 tons of gold have been mined, most of which was done in the latter half of the 20th century.

And the winner is…

1. Amanda L Grossman presents Frugal Lessons from People Who Survived the Great Depression posted at Frugal Confessions – Frugal Living and says, “Have you ever met someone who was alive during the Great Depression? They are changed people. The Great Depression left a great impression on their thoughts, their styles, and their habits. I am fascinated by this time period, and researched the question of what frugal habits these people developed to survive.”

I’d like to thank everyone who participated.  Next week’s host is PT Money, so don’t forget to submit your entry!


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Christmas for the Destitute

Finance, Parenting

First, my disclaimer:  I’m not destitute.

However, I’m trying to spend Christmas acting like I am a pauper.

Why, with small children and beautiful-and-more-than-deserving wife, would I want to deprive my family of a bountiful holiday?

Before we get into the reasons for being a horrible grinch bent on depriving my children of their god-given right to rampant consumerism, let’s look at the Philosophy of Destitution.

The primary reason to pull back and tone it down is basic frugality.  Excessive anything is not frugal. I am training my children–and for that matter, my wife and my self–in the finer arts of personal responsibility and frugality.   Accumulating debt for a fleeting holiday is insane.  If we can’t afford to buy it, we certainly can’t afford to give it.   Anything else would be setting a bad example and children learn best by example.

Another piece of the Philosophy of Destitution(when I read this word, I hear a deep, booming voice in my head, like a 30s radio superhero voiceover)  is “green”.    I consider myself a conservationalist rather than an environmentalist, so don’t read too much into that color.  I try to be responsible, instead of destructive and I try to avoid being wasteful.  Toys that won’t be played with are wasteful. A garbage can full of packaging for those same toys costs money.  It is much cheaper to avoid the landfill here.

Back to “Why”. Why would I be willing to deprive my family?

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