What would your future-you have to say to you?
The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.
What would your future-you have to say to you?
On Father’s Day, 3 years ago, my third and final kid was born. My kids are all horrible brats and I love them dearly.
I wouldn’t give up fatherhood for anything. Watching my kids grow and learn, steering their development, and teaching them how to navigate life is the most fulfilling thing I’ve ever been a part of. Also the most frustrating. I can’t imagine being anywhere else, not being with my kids. I have no respect for deadbeat parents.
I am incredibly grateful that I had a proper model for manhood and fatherhood. My dad taught me the concepts of honor, integrity, and responsibility. I couldn’t be the man I am now, if he wasn’t the man he is. Thanks, Dad.
Sometimes, the coolest things in the world are the things most likely to kill you. Call me crazy, but I’d happily strap a 1200 cc propeller to my crotch and find out what 10,000 feet looks like.
Via Budgeting In The Fun Stuff, Super Frugalette reminds us that, when there’s a significant amount of money involved, spending a few hundred dollars on an attorney isn’t wasteful.
Fivecentnickel discuss multi-level marketing. It doesn’t matter which company you are in, if your downline is more important that your product, it’s a bad business model.
Keith Ferrazzi shows us how to improve our body language when it really matters.
When I started driving, I tossed my car in a ditch going way too fast. Naturally, it was my parents’ fault for giving me the curfew I was trying to beat. They never would have bought it if I would have told them I was driving like my grandma and it jumped into the trees by itself. Why does the FBI think that’s believable? Corruption, maybe?
Financial Samurai talks about living a life without regrets, which is a personal goal of mine.
Food storage will become critical when the zombies come.
Beer is good. Even the cave-men thought so.
Carnivals I’ve Rocked and Guest Posts I’ve Rolled
3 Ways to Keep Your Finances Organized was an Editor’s Pick in this week’s Festival of Frugality. Thanks!
5 Reasons Your Wealth Isn’t Growing was included in this week’s Carnival of Personal Finance.
Money Problems: Insurance was included in the Totally Money Blog Carnival.
Unlicense Health Insurance was included in last week’s Carnival of Personal Finance.
Thank you! If I missed anyone, please let me know.
Last week, the Yakezie shared what they would do with a single financial do-over.
– Melissa from Mom’s Plans shares her biggest financial mistake at Barbara Friedberg Personal Finance: Opening an eBay Store and Using Credit. It is a great story about how not to grow your business and how competing priorities can pose a real challenge.
– Budgeting in the Fun Stuff shares her biggest financial mistake and potential do-over at Super Frugalette: Investing in a Friend’s Business. Its a good, but costly lesson learned about small business.
– Eric from Narrow Bridge Finance shares how He Wouldn’t Have Paid Down His Student Loans So Fast at The Saved Quarter. This may seem counter-intuitive, but he has some good points. Check it out.
– Mr. S from Broke Professionals shares how He Wouldn’t Have Bought a New Car at My Personal Finance Journey. This has some great analysis, especially considering the new car was a hybrid!
– The College Investor posted at Wealth Informatics: What you should know when you are investing?
– Wealth Informatics posted here: If you had one financial do-over, what would it be and why?
– Barbara Friedberg shares how She Was Scammed at Mom’s Plans. You have to watch out for the hard sell!
– Joe at Retireby40 tells us about How He Invested his 401(k) in Company Stock right before the dot com crash, at Financially Consumed. A financial adviser may have helped avoid this one!
– Financially Consumed shares his Car Purchase Do-Over And Over at Retireby40. Car addicts have it tough!
– LaTisha from FSYA shares her do-over story in It’s Never Too Late at Little House in the Valley. Sometimes the do-over is quicker and more painless than most.
– Little House yell’s Do-Over! Do-Over! at FSYA Online. It looks at the road to saving more, starting on an elementary school playground!
– The Single Saver asks, What Are The Long Term Consequences of Small Purchases at Totally Money. A cool post on how past purchases cost future returns!
– Miss Moneypenniless from Totally Money shares her story of Vacationing to the Brink of Bankruptcy. Sometimes a vacation can be fun, but the bills afterward may be daunting.
– Super Frugalette shares How a Lawyer Could Have Saved Her $24,700 at Budgeting in the Fun Stuff. Maybe lawyers are worth it sometimes?
– Jason from Live Real, Now shares how he Amassed $90,000 of Debt at Debt Eye. A good lesson in living a little more frugally.
– Kevin from Debteye shares his do-over: Not Buying a House Right Out of College at Live Real, Now. I have said it before that buying a house can be challenging right out of college.
– Penny from The Saved Quarter shares how She Would Have Finished College Before Having Kids at Narrow Bridge Finance. An awesome story that has will soon have a happy ending!
– Jacob from My Personal Finance Journey shares how he was Scammed on eBay at Broke Professionals. An important lesson for anyone selling or buying online.
– Marissa from Thirty-Six Months shares how she Accumulated a Ton of Student Loan Debt at So Over Debt. If you are going to live the life, you’re going to pay the price!
– Andrea from So Over Debt shares How She Would Have Started Saving for Retirementat Thirty-Six Months. I would love to read a post on each of the stories you mentioned getting to where you are now!
– Below Your Means shares his story about A Missed Investment Opportunity. There are so many times I wish I could have gone back and bought a stock!
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For those of you who haven’t been following along, I’m in debt. Starting 13 years ago, when I was 19, I managed to bury myself in debt, until I decided I’d had enough of that…almost 2 years ago.
Why?
It wasn’t because of college expenses, though they contributed to my debt level. I was in debt before I went to college. Heck, I was a daddy before I went to college.
It wasn’t because of major medical procedures. The only major medical procedures we’ve ever had were the births of our children, and we had two of them well after we built our shackles.
It wasn’t because we bought more house than we could afford. We own a modest house that we bought before the bubble started.
Then what was it? Why did we do the things we did that have financially crippled us for so long?
It was a combination of things, crowned by a glorious lack of financial sophistication. As I wrote in No Brakes, neither of us had the early training to really understand our financial decisions. We knew bills need to be paid, but what was the difference if the money came from a credit card versus our checking account? Why did it matter if we carried a balance on the cards, as long as we could make the payments? What’s wrong with just making the minimum payment?
Naïve. Unsophisticated.
That day-to-day lack of sophistication was only part of the problem, and it wasn’t the biggest part. We made a lot mistakes, but they were all small. Before 2001, I think our total was about $5000. Too much, but not painful.
Between the fall of 2001 and the winter of 2002, we took our naïve decision-making process and ran with it. It was a full-scale mistake marathon.
That year, we built an addition on our house, because a full dining room and a bigger kitchen would make our house so much more livable and it was cheaper than buying a home, new. Oh, and since the difference between the mandatory crawlspace and a full basement room was just a few rows of concrete blocks, let’s expand it. Wait, don’t bedrooms require walls, sheetrock, windows, closets, paint, furniture, and electricity?
That was also the year that the car companies all jumped on the 0% loan fad. In case you don’t remember, that was the program that meant you could get a 0% loan on a new car if you picked up a 3 year term on your loan. At 22, making maybe $45,000 combined, we decided that buying a $35,000 truck was a good idea. To save money. Rationalization is wonderful. Or at least, effective.
That summer, we got married. We did a phenomenal job getting married on the cheap. We had about 100 guests, a park to get married in, flowers, food, and a hall to eat and dance in, for about $3000. The problem was, we didn’t have $3000. We didn’t have the $1500 + activities for our 10 day honeymoon on a Caribbean cruise, either, though I still plan on returning to St. Thomas.
None of those individual payments were terrible. The biggest problem was that we piled them all so close together that we never had time to absorb their impact before taking on the next obligation. When we did realize how much we had to pay, we made up for it by only buying big things that came with a “0% for a year” deal, like our living room set, our carpet, and our dining room table.
Then, when we finally did pay something off, or came into more money, we’d immediately expand our lifestyle to fill the void. The month we paid off our truck, I got a significant raise. Did we use it to pay off some other debt? Of course not, we bought a new car on a six year term.
We had so many opportunities to make bad decisions with our money, and I think we took them all and have suffered for it, since.
If you’re in debt, what made you decide to get that way?
Ahhh, New York City. The Mecca of all that is glamorous, rich, luxurious and exciting. To some, the good life. So, you’re ready to pack your bags and head for the big city? Slow down there, big dreamer. The cost of
EVERYTHING in the city is higher than the national average, meaning your 70K per year needs to be 166K in New York City to keep your current lifestyle. Let’s talk about the basics here: lodging, food and entertainment:
If rent has not broken you, you must also eat! I mean, you won’t be eating MUCH after paying rent, but you will need a nibble here and there. It will come as no surprise that the restaurants in New York City are pricey. Celebrity favorites such as the Four Seasons, Le Cirque and Nobu are over $50.00 PER PERSON. I just choked on my Diet Coke. Eateries such as McDonald’s and local Mexican restaurants are abundant, but they too are higher priced than elsewhere. Your best bet? Learn to cook. Eat leftovers. Use coupons. Pair those coupons with sale items. Find a generous and rich companion. Skip meals.
As far as entertainment goes, I’m afraid at this point, your only entertainment will be browsing the web for supplementary forms of income. Seriously, unless you are in the 1%, utilize the many forms of free entertainment that New York City has to offer. A jog through Central Park, window shopping or a walk through the city all offer ample opportunity for fun free of charge. Sadly, Broadway plays and designer shopping must be left to the rich and famous.
In conclusion, one can lead a good, but not extravagant, life in New York City on a normal income. Be prepared to work hard, save hard and live frugally. Unless you’re living on money that is coming from an investment or dividend, you shouldn’t expect anything more. Listen, New York City is exciting, good grief, it’s the “city that never sleeps,” but it isn’t cheap. Of course, the people I know who have lived there for a short stint of time had little money and have since moved on – with no regrets and countless memories from that season of life.
“Honey, here on national television, in front of a live studio audience, I’ve got a secret I’d like to share. You’re not our child’s mother. I’ve been sleeping with the milkman. And the goat. Your mom is the star of my new adult website. With the goat. And the milkman. I’ve got three other families, in three other cities. I lost the house to my gambling addiction. Those sores? Herpesyphiligonoritis. I got it from the foreign exchange student we hosted before I moved her to Dubuque and married her. The goat gave her away. The milkman cried. Oh, and I wore your panties to the Illinois Nazi reunion. I know how much you hate Illinois Nazis. But I still love you. And your sister. Especially your sister. She does that thing with her tongue….”
Why would anyone go on national television to share things like that?
More interesting: why would anybody stay on stage after hearing that?
Stay tuned.
I have this friend. He bought a couple of cars. He’s got some issues with money, partially revolving around a need to keep his assets below a certain threshold. So he put the cars in his girlfriend’s name. I know, it’s slightly crooked, but that makes the story more fun.
They broke up.
Recently, she called him to say she was suing him for the cars. She wanted them. She wanted to hurt him. She was mean. Somehow that turned into them agreeing to settle the case on Judge Joe Brown, on national television.
My friend spoke with the show’s producer, then last week, he was flown to California and put up in a hotel for a couple of days. When he arrived at the TV studio, he was informed that it wasn’t Judge Joe Brown, but a new show that will start airing in the fall called, The Test. According to CBS, The Test “is a one-hour conflict resolution talk show that will use lie detector and DNA tests to settle relationship and paternity disputes among the guests.” Coincidentally, CBS also owns Judge Joe Brown.
My friend got on stage with Dr. Phil’s son, Jay McGraw, and was accused of cheating on his girlfriend and stealing her identity. Lie detectors. Yelling. Accusations.
Why did he stay?
He wasn’t given his return plane ticket until they were done filming.
When he was done, they handed him a voucher for cab fare and the itinerary for his return flight. Until then, he had no other way to get home.
That’s why people stay on stage. It’s probably also why none of those shows ever have people with money of their own; they can find their own way home in a pinch.
Interesting side note: The show paid $200 and booked the cheapest possible return flight, with a 6 hour layover.
Today, I continuing the series, Money Problems: 30 Days to Perfect Finances. The series will consist of 30 things you can do in one setting to perfect your finances. It’s not a system to magically make your debt disappear. Instead, it is a path to understanding where you are, where you want to be, and–most importantly–how to bridge the gap.
I’m not running the series in 30 consecutive days. That’s not my schedule. Also, I think that talking about the same thing for 30 days straight will bore both of us. Instead, it will run roughly once a week. To make sure you don’t miss a post, please take a moment to subscribe, either by email or rss.
This is day 4 and today, you are going to make a budget.
Now that you’ve got your list of expenses and you’ve figured out your income, it’s time to put them together and do the dreaded deed. Your going to make a budget today. Don’t be scared. I’ll hold your hand.
Here are the tools you need:
Setting up the spreadsheet is dead simple.
Create a column for the label, telling you what each line item is. Create a column to hold the monthly payment amount. At the bottom of column 2, create a formula that totals your expenses. If you are including a bill that isn’t due monthly, use a formula similar to the day 3 income formula to figure out what you need to set aside each month. To figure a quarterly bill, multiply the amount by 4, then divide by 12. To figure a weekly bill, multiply by 52 and divide by 12.
Scoot over a few columns and do the same thing for your income.
Scoot over a couple more columns and set up a total. This is easy. It’s just a matter of subtracting your expenses from you income. Hopefully, this gives you a positive number.
To make this even easier, I’ve shared a blank budget spreadsheet. No excuses. If that simple spreadsheet doesn’t meet your needs, I’ve got a much more detailed version that includes categories. I use the detailed version.
Making a budget may be the most intimidating financial step you take, but everything else is built on the assumption that you understand where you money came from and where it is going. Without,it, your navigating a major maze based on a coin flip instead of a map.