This is a conversation between me and my future self, if my financial path wouldn’t have positively forked 2 years ago. The transcript is available here.
What would your future self have to say to you?
I’m the Bad Guy
My wife and daughters are active in a saddle club, even though we don’t own any horses. We’ve been borrowing them for shows when my girls compete.
My wife’s cousin has been trying to sell one of her horses for a few months. Because this horse has alpha-male problems, it has to be kept in a stall. Stall boarding runs $450 per month as opposed to $200 in a group paddock.
Since my girls love this horse, Cousin continually tries to convince my wife to buy it.
My wife’s response is “Jason won’t let me buy a horse, yet.” Then all of her friends get to complain about how I’m not supportive.
Uhhh, no.
We are $10,000 away from paying off truck. We’re $23,000 away from being mortgage-free. After that, we’re planning to rent out the house we’re in and buy a hobby farm.
Yes, Mr. Unsupportive is planning to uproot everything and move to the country so my wife and daughters can have horses on site.
Shame on me. I’m such a jerk.
In a couple of years, I want to buy a $450,000 spread on about a dozen acres and let my wife’s dreams come true.
Or, we could buy a couple of horses now and never have the money for a down payment.
Or, we could buy the farm now, buy the horses now, spend every last cent of our savings on a down payment, spend more than half of our income on our mortgage payment, never get ahead, and end up losing everything.
Such a jerk.
This is a case where we have to do everything in the right order, or it will all come tumbling down on our heads in a few years. If I have to be the bad guy to avoid screwing ourselves later, so be it.
Resolutions That Don’t Suck
I’m not a huge fan of New Year’s resolutions. Generally speaking, if you don’t have the willpower to do something any other time of the year, you probably won’t grow that willpower just because the last number on the calendar changed.
Seriously, if you’ve got something worth changing, change it right away, don’t wait for a special day.
That said, this is the time of the year that many people choose to try to improve…something. Some people try to lose weight, other people quit shooting meth into their eyeballs, yet others(the ones I’m going to talk about) decide it’s time to get out of debt.
Now most people are going to throw out some huge and worthless goals like:
- I need to lose some weight.
- I need to save more.
- I need to be a better person.
- I need to shoot less meth into my eyeball.
The problem with goals like that is the definitions. What is “some”, “more”, “better”, or “less”? How do you know when you’ve won.
It’s better to take on smaller goals that have real definitions.
Try these:
- I’m going to lose 20 pounds.
- I’m going to save $1200.
- I need to stop locking my children in the closet when I go to the movies.
- I am never ever going to shoot meth into my eyeball again.
But Jason, I hear you saying, where am I going to find $1000 to save? Well, Dear Reader, I’m glad you asked. Next time though, could you ask in a way that others can hear so my wife doesn’t feel the need to call the nice men in the white coats again?
Let’s break that goal down even further.
Instead of saving $1200, let’s call it $100 per month. That’s a bite-sized goal. Some people don’t even have that to spare, so what can they do?
Let’s make that resolution something like “I’m going to have frozen pizza instead of my regular weekly delivery.” If your house is anything like mine, that brings a $60 pizza bill down to $15 for some good frozen pizza for a savings of $45. If you order pizza once a week, that’s $180 saved each month, double your goal. That’s a win with very little suffering.
Now, you can take that extra $80 that you hadn’t even planned for and throw it at your credit cards. That’s a free payment every month. Before you know it, you’ll have your cards paid off and a decent savings account.
Then you can thank me because I made it all possible.
Side Hustle: The Garage Sale Preparation
We had a garage sale last week, as a wrap-up to the April 30 Day Project. We got rained out halfway through the first day of our 3-day sale, but we still managed to clear $1500. We held the sale in our neighbor’s garage because it had more space and better visibility.
Wednesday night, while carrying boxes over, I missed the step to their property from our driveway and crashed while carrying three boxes. That’s a twisted ankle and a bleeding knee. Naturally, while I’m hopping and swearing, everyone is concerned that I’m okay. The worry-warts. Anyway, it hurt, so we stopped setting up while we still had a few boxes left in the basement.
[ad name=”inlineleft”]Thursday morning, I decided to show them all. At 5:30AM, before anybody else is strongly considering the possibility of maybe thinking about getting ready to hit the snooze button, I decided to get the rest of the boxes ready. They’d all wake up, worried about how I’m feeling, asking if I’m to stiff to carry boxes. The best way to show them they don’t need to worry would be to have all of the boxes dealt with before they woke up. So I started. Up and down the stairs, with a stiff, twisted ankle, gloating to myself about how tough I was…BOOM, down the stairs. I was on my back, sliding down the stairs. I caught a stair-tread in the small of my back and another on the point of my tailbone. Mommy?
After I stopped twitching on the floor at the base of the stairs, I managed to get the last of the boxes ready. Instead of sympathy, I spent the rest of the weekend getting asked if I needed an inflatable doughnut to sit on. There are places I’d prefer not to have bruised.
Unpacking the boxes made me glad that everything was priced. We spent 6 weeks going through our entire house–every room, every dresser, every drawer–to eliminate the clutter. As something went into a box, it got priced, so we didn’t have to do it all at the last minute. That is the most important time-saving step for a garage sale. Price it as you pack it. You don’t want to waste hours pricing stuff while tripping over potential customers.
Another preparation tip to do early: Find tables! Ask around. You’d be surprised at who has a dozen folding tables collecting dust in his basement. It’s better to borrow that to rent. The best price I found was $17.50 to rent an 8′ X 30″ table for a week. We didn’t have to do that, but we thought we would have to. I borrowed a few, found a few, and built a few out of sawhorses.
The week before the sale, we placed an ad in the paper. When I placed the ad, the paper called to suggest we change it from running the weekend before to running just the days of the sale. I agreed, to a point, but their Sunday circulation is miles ahead of the weekday circulation, so why pay to run an ad nobody will see on Thursday? I ran it Sunday through Tuesday, because I wanted the Sunday ad and we got 3 consecutive days in the price. Did I actually know better than the paper’s sales-weasel? Who knows? I think I made the right decision.
The Sunday before the sale, I posted an ad on Craigslist. Interesting fact: little old ladies use Craiglist to plan their garage-sale adventures.
Two days before the sale, we made signs. Bright pink signs with brighter yellow starbursts. They were all simple. “Mega Sale! 8-5” followed by an arrow and our address. Simple, easy-to-read, and bright. The morning of the sale, after the ibuprofen kicked in, I put the signs up. When you make signs out of paper, always include a crossbar. It rained a lot the first day of the sale, so the signs wilted. The second morning, I went out with some duct tape and crossbars and fixed them all.
The day before the sale, we got cash and change. We had $50 in 1s and 5s and $25 in silver change. No pennies. Nothing was priced to make us need them.
The morning of the sale, we set up two canopy tents in the driveway and pulled the prepared-and-filled table out under them. We finished stacking as much as we could on the tables and called it “open”. There were a few boxes we couldn’t put out due to the rain. We simply ran our of room. At noon, $65 into the sale, we decided enough was enough and shut down–cold, wet, and miserable. Lunch and a nap made the day better.
Later, I’ll discuss the other parts of our successful sale.
Note: The entire series is contained in the Garage Sale Manual on the sidebar.
Update: This post has been included in the Money Hacks Carnival.
Bribes vs Rewards
What’s the difference between a bribe and a reward? It’s a question that has been heavily on my mind lately. As a father of three–1, 3 and 10–motivating children occupies a lot of my thoughts. Is it possible to motivate a child and reward good behavior without resorting to a bribe?
First, let’s look at the definitions:
bribe n.
1. Something, such as money or a favor, offered or given to a person in a position of trust to influence that person’s views or conduct.
2. Something serving to influence or persuade.
re·ward n.
1. Something given or received in recompense for worthy behavior or in retribution for evil acts.
2. Money offered or given for some special service, such as the return of a lost article or the capture of a criminal.
3. A satisfying return or result; profit.
4. Psychology: The return for performance of a desired behavior; positive reinforcement.
In my mind, a reward is given either as a goal for planned activity or a surprise for good behavior. When used for surprises, it should never be common enough to be expected. If a child is only behaving because she is expecting a reward, it is bribed behavior. She should always be surprised to get the reward.
Using a reward for goal setting is no different than collecting a paycheck. Is my company bribing me to do the work I do every day? They plan to reward or compensate me for the work I plan to do for them. While that my be blurring the line between compensation and rewards, it is valid. My future paycheck is the motivation for my current work.
Bribes, on the other hand, are reward for bad behavior. If my three-year-old is throwing a tantrum in the grocery store and I promise her candy to stop, I have just taught her that the “reward” for a public tantrum is candy. This is reinforcing negative behavior, which will only escalate in the future. If a temper tantrum earns a candy bar, what will she get for hitting Mommy with a frying pan?
The line is further blurred by preemptive bribes. If I tell my children there will be candy when we get home if they behave in the store, it’s still a bribe. Promising dessert if my son cleans his room is a bribe.
So what is the difference?
Bribes reward negative behavior. Whether that is actual behavior or anticipated behavior, bribes provide a reward for it. If you use a treat to end or preempt bad actions, you are bribing your child.
Rewards celebrate positive behavior. A promised treat for going beyond expectations or a surprise for excellent behavior is a reward. It should never become common, or the child will discover that withholding the positive behavior will generate promises of larger rewards. The goal is to reinforce the good to encourage positive behaviors even when there is no likelihood for reward.
For example, my son’s school is part of a reading contest. Over a two month period, if the students read 500 pages outside of school, they will get tickets to a basketball game. If they are in the top three for pages read, they will get personalize jerseys and on-court recognition. My son did the math and was reading enough to surpass the 500 page goal, but not enough to get into the top three. I offered a prize if he made it to 2500 pages. In my opinion, that’s a reward. He was already going beyond the requirement. I have provided motivation to push himself beyond what he thinks he can do. That’s positive reinforcement of good behavior.
On the other hand, when my eight-year-old was refusing to eat dinner, we offered a cookie for dessert if she ate well. That’s reinforcing negative behavior by giving a reward for misbehaving. A bribe.
Rewards are positive responses to positive behavior to motivate future good behavior. Bribes are rewards for negative behavior, real or anticipated, that only serve to encourage more bad behavior in the future.
How Cheap Can a Disney Vacation Be?
Earlier this month, I took my family to Disney World. That’s me, my wife, and my three kids (ages 8, 9, 16). Disney is one of the most expensive vacations you can take in the U.S.
We went from one Saturday to the next, in the beginning of August. August is just after peak season, so prices and crowds were down a bit from early summer. During the school year is out of the question because my wife is a school bus driver at an understaffed company. It was a bit hotter, but the price and family availability balanced out the heat nicely.
We stayed in a 1 bedroom resort on Disney property. It was a bit more expensive, but the room slept all five of us, my wife and I had a separate bedroom, and it was equipped with a full kitchen and laundry.
This wasn’t cheap.
We spent:
- $1595.96 on airfare and car rental, as a package
- $75 on upgrading the seats on our flight one way, because those were the only seats available next to each other.
- $131.11 upgrading our rental car during pickup. The third row seating was nice, both for our day trip to Cocoa Beach and for our grocery run with five suitcases.
- $4396.21 for the hotel, 4 days of Disney parks, and the included Magic Bands. Magic Bands are the awesomest way to handle hotel rooms, resort tickets, and food. You don’t need to carry a wallet in Disney World.
- $715.26 on things charged to our Magic Bands, including miscellaneous coffee, snack, and water purchases in the park, a few small souvenirs, approximately $380 at in-park restaurants, and a couple of gifts for the people who took care of our pets while we were gone.
- $15 for parking at the Cocoa Beach Pier
- $152.28 for lunch at the restaurant on the pier
- Roughly $350 on groceries and one fast food drive through meal one night
- $118.31 at the horrible Wolfgang Puck Express restaurant at the Disney Springs shopping center
- $31.59 on gas for the rental car.
- $47.35 for a movie to kill time between hotel checkout and airport check-in
- Total: $7628.07
We saved:
- $1404.14 by using signup bonus miles from two Chase Sapphire cards, bringing the flight plus rental to $188.82 plus upgrades.
- $1870.16 by using Capital One Venture card rewards. A bonus reward on one card, and regular miles on another.
- Total: $3274.30
Grand Total: $4353.77
We had about $2000 of that saved before we bought the tickets and $2000 more budgeted to pay the remaining bill quickly. $4350 spent on a trip with a $4000 budget isn’t too bad.
We opened the rewards cards more than a year ago to make sure we’d hit the sign-up bonus qualifications in time.
A few Disney tips:
- Your first day in the park, find a Disney Vacation Club booth. Go to a timeshare sales pitch. For real. It’s a low-pressure pitch that’s over in 45 minutes if you’re not interested (and you won’t be. Timeshares–especially at retail price–are stupid. Don’t sign up.) that will net you three tap-and-go fast passes and a $100 gift card. The fast passes alone saved us about 3 hours of lines.
- Install the Disney app. You can get directions to rides and manage fast passes and dinner reservations.
- Subscribe to Touring Plans. It costs $10 if you have a coupon, and there’s always a coupon. You can plan out your day at each park, including fast passes and breaks. It will give you wait times and walking times and suggest what is possibly the most efficient way to see everything you want to see. We saw 90% of everything everyone was interested in without running around. You really can do all of each of the parks in 4 days.
- Take breaks. We got there early, then left a bit after lunch time to head back to the hotel for food, rest, and swimming. We came back shortly before dinner and spent the evening. That skipped the hottest, busiest part of the day and helped avoid small children getting crabby. Take breaks.
- Go to each of the parks on their least busy day. It’s easiest to see it all if you plan to be there when fewer other people are competing for line space.
- Don’t waste your fast passes on rides with short lines. We made it through the Pirates of the Caribbean line in 10 minutes. That would have been wasteful.
- Try to book all of your fast passes in the morning, so you can schedule new ones for later in the day. You can’t add new ones while you have pending ones on your account.
- Use the timeshare fast passes at Magic Kingdom. They don’t have to be scheduled and must be used on a moving ride. Magic Kingdom is the heaviest concentration of moving rides, and they have the longest lines.
- Have fun. For real, don’t forget to have fun. If people are getting crabby, pack up and head to the hotel for a few hours. The only park that makes this a pain is Magic Kingdom, since they hide the park a mile away from the parking. Don’t force the park experience, just let go and let things happen. Says the guy who brought an optimized agenda to each park
This was a good time for us. I’m glad we waited. We’re in the short window where the girls will remember the trip and the boy hasn’t moved out and gotten a busy life of his own.
