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The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.

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Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.
Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?
Me: Yes?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: May I ask what that was for?
FMe: Of course.
Me: What was that for, jerk?
FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.
Me: What?!?  I’ve never even met you, before.
FMe: Of course you have.  I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.
Me: Huh?
FMe: Listen close.  You’re not  the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.
Me: ???
FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.
Me: I don’t appreciate….
FMe: Shut up.  I was dumb then, too.  Remember?  You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year.  On top of many other expensive decisions.  Do your recall?
Me: Yes, I do.  So what?
FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car.  Your kids wear new clothes.  You’ve got a house full of new furniture.  How did you pay for all of that?
Me: Naturally, I charged it.  Zero payments, zero interest for a year!  Pretty smart, huh?
FMe: What happens in a year?
Me: I don’t know.  I’ve got a full year to figure that out.
FMe: <Slap!>  I’ll tell you what happens!  Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed!   Your raise didn’t come through.  You had a baby. The truck broke down.  Your wife took maternity leave.  A roommate moved out.  You took a loss in the stock market.  You didn’t plan!  You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.
Me: How was I to know?
FMe: <Slap!>  Life happens!  You never know what is coming next.  You need to plan and save for what might happen.  Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly.  That is not acceptable.
Me:  So?  What are you going to do about it?
FMe: <Slap!>
Me: Really?  Again?
FMe: <Slap!>  I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help.  Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux.  My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford.   You’ve screwed me, dude.
Me: I’m sorry.  What can I do to fix it?
FMe: Buy me dinner, first.
Me: Huh?!?!?
FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change.  No credit.
Me: None?
FMe: None.  Nada.  Zip.  Zilch.  Only spend what you can afford. Budget.  Pay off those nasty bills.  Don’t leave me hanging.
Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?
FMe: Exactly.  That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence.  Live in the real world.
Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me!  Now I know.
FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

 

A Budget Isn’t Enough

Finance

Pre-war Bayer heroin bottle, originally contai...
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You know exactly how much you make, to the penny.   You’ve listed all of your bills in a spreadsheet, including the annual payment for your membership to Save the  Combat-Wombat.   You know exactly how much is coming in and how much has to go out each month.   Your income is more than your expenses, yet somehow,  you still have more month than money.

What’s going on?

The short answer is that a budget is not enough.

A budget is not…

…a checkbook register. Do you track everything you spend?  Are you busting your budget on $10 lattes or DVDs every few days?  Is the take-out you have for lunch every day adding up to 3 times your food budget?  Are you sure?   If you don’t track what you spend, how do you know what you’ve actually spent?  You have to keep track of what you are spending.   Luckily there are ways to do this that don’t involve complex calculation, laborious systems or even proper math.   The easy options include using cash for all of your discretionary spending(no money, no spendy!), rounding your spending up so you always have more money than you think you do, or even keeping your discretionary money is a separate debit account.  That will let you keep your necessary expenses covered.  You’ll just have to check your discretionary account’s balance often and always remember that sometimes, things take a few days to hit your bank.

…a debt repayment plan. You may know how much you have available, but if you aren’t exercising the discipline to pay down your debt and avoid using more debt, you not only won’t make progress, but you’ll continue to dig a deeper hole.   Without properly managing the money going out, watching the money coming in is pointless.

…an alternative to responsible spending. Your budget may say you have $500 to spare every month, but does that mean you should blow it on smack instead of setting up an emergency fund?   I realize most heroin addicts probably aren’t reading this, but dropping $500 at the bar or racetrack is just as wasteful if you don’t have your other finances in order.   Take care of your future needs before you spend all of your money on present(and fleeting) pleasures.

A budget is a starting point for keeping your financial life organized and measuring a positive cash flow.  By itself, it can’t help you.   You need to follow it up with responsible planning and spending.

Avoiding Financial Traps & Saving Money on Big-Ticket Purchases

Finance

 This is a guest post written by Jason Larkins. He writes at WorkSaveLive – a blog he started to help people change the way they think about their finances, careers, and lives.

Who doesn’t like to buy stuff?

Okay…I’m sure there are a few of you out there that take pride in never buying a new “toy,” but I know personally that I LOVE stuff!

Not to the point that I make dumb financial decisions that jeopardizes my family’s financial well-being, but I do have that natural American desire to have nice things and to be able to do fun stuff!

If you’re in the market to buy a Big-Ticket item (i.e. a new car, TV, or other technology gadget), what are some of the things you should be thinking through as you contemplate making the purchase?

The first mistake people make is buying on impulse. The massive majority of Americans don’t even have a thought process when it comes to buying toys, so that’s why I decided to dedicate a post on a few things you should ponder.

3 Financial Traps You Should Avoid

1. Avoid spending extra for add-ons, or features, that you’re never going to use.

It is easy to get an appliance or technology gadget that has a ton of amazing features on it – but why pay for them if you won’t use them?

Consider buying the item that may be a step below what you’re looking at.

I know that I personally love the thought of having an Ipad 2, but am I really going to utilize it to it’s full capabilities?

Probably not!

It doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have one, but it does mean I can look at the older Ipad and save some money. Or, I can avoid the purchase altogether if I don’t think it’s going to be worth the money.

2. Be cautious with offers such as “no money down,” “90 days same as cash,” or “12 months interest free.”

Nearly 88% of the “90 days same as cash” offers are actually converted to payments because the purchaser couldn’t pay off the bill before the offer was up.

3. Don’t buy it just because it’s the cheapest.

Always be sure to do research prior to your purchase – check consumer reviews and product reviews. Saving money may not be worth it if the product breaks down quickly or doesn’t have the functionality that you’re looking for.

3 Strategies to Save Money

1. Prepare for large purchases and pay cash for them.

If you can’t pay cash for the item, then there is a good chance that you can’t afford it.

Determine how much money you will need to spend on a particular item and save up for it! This is going to help you in a couple of ways:

  • It will help you avoid buying on impulse.
  • If it takes awhile to save up for the item, then this will give you valuable time to really determine if it’s something you WANT badly enough to pay that kind of cash for it.
  • It will allow you to ask for a DEAL. Every retailer pays a fee to run a debit/credit card. If you’re paying in cash the worst you can do is to ask for that 2-3% discount the store would be saving!

2. Buy at the end of the month, or at the end of the year!

Consumers rarely think of this, but it’s important for you to know that every store (and store manager) has monthly/yearly sales to report.

If they’re wanting to close out the month/year strong, they’re much more inclined to offer you a deal on whatever you’re buying!

3. Avoid the extended warranty!

Insurance (in general terms) is the act of transferring risk – the more people that pool money together to help mitigate risk (buy insurance), then the lower the cost of the insurance becomes.

The reason to avoid the extended warranties is because the cost you’re paying to cover your item also includes: commissions paid to the retail store, overhead for the insurance company (wages for employees, building costs, utilities, etc), and some profit for the insurance company as well.

Sure, you may be in the miniscule percentage of buyers that has their item break down on them, but the reality is that it’s unlikely.

If it was likely for your item to break down, then the insurance wouldn’t be available because it wouldn’t be a profitable endeavor for the insurance company (and they’d be out of business).

Whenever you’re buying something that has a large price tag, you should develop a process that you think through before buying it!

Always pay in cash, get a deal, and make sure you actually need everything you’re paying for.

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How to Live Happily Without a Budget

Finance

Three years ago, we sat down and built our budget. We spent 9 months adding the non-monthly bills that we forgot about when we created the budget.   Setbacks and shortfalls almost killed the budgeting plan completely. It took almost an entire year to get our budget right.

Unrelated Image

Now?  I refer to the budget once per month.   No more.   I don’t check it at bill-paying time. I don’t think about it daily.   It’s there as a reference when I need it, but it no longer drives our finances.  How did we get to that point?

First, we firmly established our budget.  We know exactly what we need to cover our expenses.   None of the predictable bills catch us by surprise any more.  This is important.

Once we had the budget established, the rest was easy.   I moved almost every bill to US Bank’s online bill-pay system and switched to electronic billing and automatic payments.   The automatic payments are all through US Bank.  I only allow my mortgage to be set up with the merchant. I want total, instant control over the rest.  I won’t call a merchant to ask them to change a payment if something comes up.   The bank sends me an email when a payment is automatically scheduled, and again when it is paid.

Once I got comfortable with the automatic payments, I switched to electronic billing. I don’t need to see the bill or waste the paper if I know it is being handled for me which is why I encourage you to manage all your finances online.  I do check the few bills that may change, like the credit card and cell phone.  Now, I see few of my bills.  They are all sent electronically to my bank, automatically paid, and scheduled in Quicken–all without intervention from me.

[ad name=”inlineleft”]We also use an envelope system.  I know how much we need for groceries, baby crap, clothes, etc.   At the beginning of the month, I take out all of that money in cash and put it into the appropriate envelopes.   Other than this money, almost everything else takes care of itself. I don’t need to pay attention to by bills on a day-t0-day basis.   Any extra money that comes in gets divided among our debt repayment and savings goals, which only takes a few minutes to arrange.

I glance over my budget at the beginning of every month, but I only review it when something changes. If we change our cell phone, or our budgeted gas bill changes, I make the change to our budget.  Other than that, it’s not even an afterthought.

That’s how we do it.

Another option includes the Sloppy Math System. This consists simply of rounding deposits down and rounding expenses up.  The more you round, the better the system works.    If you round every deposit down $50, and round every expense up to the next $10, you are naturally building more room for error.  Given enough time, you will have enough of a slush fund to handle emergencies and the occasional impulse purchase.

I’d Tap That: Making Life Difficult for Government Spying

Life

4th Amendment

 

Skip to the bottom if you’re familiar with PRISM and don’t want to hear any political talk and rampant violations of our Constitutional rights, but still want to protect your privacy.

For those of you who haven’t been paying attention, the PRISM program is an NSA program to monitor electronic activity.

Lots of electronic activity.

The companies identified to be working with the NSA in this grand overreach include AOL, Apple, Facebook, Google, Microsoft, PalTalk, Skype, Yahoo! and YouTube.  For most people, that is the definition of “the internet”.  If you’re doing it online, the NSA is–or could be, at their leisure–watching.

This isn’t a crazy conspiracy theory.  This is happening, and the government has admitted it.  In fact, when this broke, the executive branch’s response was along the lines of, “Don’t worry, we’ll find the guy who leaked this information.”

On top of that, the government has been demanding phone records from at least Verizon on a daily basis.

In addition, the Justice Department was just busted wiretapping Associated Press phones.

Seriously, if you put this in fiction, nobody would buy it, because it’s ridiculous in the land of the free.

As far as the people who say I’ve got nothing to worry about if I’m not doing anything wrong: shut up.  You can speak again when you give me your email passwords, bank records, and let me install a toilet cam in your house.  What are you trying to hide?

Seriously, there is such a mess of non-legislative administrative regulations that are considered felonies that the best estimate is that most people commit three felonies a day, without realizing it.

  • Catch your kid with a joint and neglect to call the cops?  Welcome to the federal penitentiary.
  • Use one of those pill planner things to sort prescription meds for your half-senile grandmother?  In some states, that’s a felony.

When we live in a system with so many rules that have never been voted on and our legal system refuses to consider legitimate ignorance of the law to be a defense and we have a collection of secret laws that are a felony to disclose or violate, government spying gets far more dangerous.

  • Many TSA guidelines are secret.
  • The Banking Secrecy Act of 1970 has a number of secret provisions.
  • FISA.

The Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act of 1978(FISA) is the law the NSA is using to justify all of these data requests.  The law, that we all must obey, is being overseen by a small subcommittee in Congress, and the FISA courts are just a small subset of the judges.   The judges are signing warrants allowing the wiretaps and massive surveillance, but that is clearly unconstitutional and, hence, illegal.

The text of the Fourth Amendment to the Constitution, the supreme law of the United States is: “The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.”

Any warrant that cannot name a place to be searched is illegal.

Any warrant that cannot describe the person to be monitored is illegal.

Any warrant that is not backed by probable cause is illegal.

Tell me how “I want to watch what everyone is saying on Facebook and seize all of the data” meets any of those criteria.

Bueller?

Wiretapping the AP is a serious violation of the First Amendment, too.  “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”

“Congress shall make no law…abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press..and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”

Monitoring the press in case somebody breaks a story the government doesn’t want broken is crap.

How can we petition the government for redress of grievances that they call a felony if the company discloses the violation to us?  It’s self-serving circular crap.

When you throw the IRS harassing charities working for the “wrong” politics, you start to pine for the good old days of Nixon-level fair play and integrity.

To be fair, FISA got nasty with the Patriot Act, which was an abomination enacted by a different political party.  Hey, Washington, next time try to remember that your laws will someday be administered by your political enemies, k?  (NSA: I trust you’ll pass the message for me?)

Political talk is over.  How do we stop the government snooping?

There are four main pieces to discuss, based on the scandalous Constitutional violations reported recently.

1.  Social media monitoring.   There’s nothing to this.  If you post things on Facebook, the government sees it and knows it’s you.  Don’t post anything you don’t want broadcast to the police, your grandmother, and your priest.

2.  Internet browsing.  There is very little that is secure on the internet.   The government can subpoena your ISP and get any records they keep.  Unless you go anonymous and encrypted.  Welcome to TOR.  The Onion Router is a system that encrypts your internet traffic and bounces it all over the world.   Once you enter TOR, nothing you do can be tracked, until your internet request leave the TOR system.   The system is not centrally owned or controlled, so nobody in the system can track what you are doing.

For example, if I use the TOR browser to search Wikipedia, a snoopy NSA goon could tell I’m using it, and they could tell there was a request from the TOR system to Wikipedia, but they can’t tie one request to the other.  If I’m dumb and log into Facebook, I lose that anonymous shield.

That’s solid protection from anyone watching your internet traffic.

How do you use it?

Easy.  Just install the Tor Bundle.  When you want the NSA to stop snooping over your shoulder because you want to do a search on erectile dysfunction, you launch TOR and the TOR browser and search without having to share your embarrassing secrets.

3.  Email.  Email is easily the least secure means you can communicate.  When you send an email, that message is in plain text, and it bounces from server to server until it reaches the recipient.  Any of the involved servers can keep a log of the traffic and read your email.

Never, ever, ever, ever put anything incriminating or important in an email.  Don’t send credit card numbers, your social security number, or the address of your meth lab.

But what if you want to have a dirty conversation with your spouse without letting the sick voyeurs at the NSA listen to you ask your wife what she’s wearing and how would she like it torn off?

Use PGP.  OpenPGP is a free software encryption program that is basically impossible to decrypt.   It’s known as public-key encryption, which means that anybody can encrypt a message to you that only you can read.

It’s like magic.

To use PGP, the easy way(for Windows users) is to get Gpg4win.  Install that, then open Kleopatra.  This will let you generate your encryption key.  You do that by:

  • Clicking File, then New Certificate
  • Click Create  Personal OpenPGP key pair
  • Enter your name and email, then click next, then “Create Key”.  Enter your passphrase when asked.

You now have a set of PGP keys.  To get your public key that others can use to send you messages, right-click your certificate and select “Export certificates”.  Pick a path to save the certificate, then do so.  You can open this file with notepad to get your public key, or you can email the file out.  There is no need to worry about security with this file.

You will end up with something that looks like my public key here:

—–BEGIN PGP PUBLIC KEY BLOCK—–
Version: GnuPG v2.0.20 (MingW32)
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=fHba
—–END PGP PUBLIC KEY BLOCK—–

To get your private key, that you can use with any number of plugins for your email client, right-click on your certificate and select “Export secret keys.”

You can either use PGP as a plugin for your email client, or you can use Kleopatra’s feature “Sign/encrypt files”.  To do that, write your message in a file, then select the feature inside Kleopatra.  You’ll end up with an encrypted file you can attach to your email that snoopy government man can’t read.

4.  Phone calls.  This would appear to be harder, since your phone is largely out of your control.   There’s nothing practical you do about a landline, except to avoid saying anything sensitive.  On your cell phone, you have options, assuming you use a smartphone.

For Android users, it’s free an easy.  Install Redphone.  If you place a call with Redphone, it checks to see if the caller also uses Redphone.  If he does, it places an encrypted call over your data plan to the other phone.   Nobody can listen in to an encrypted call.   The same company also makes a program for texting.

For iPhone users, you’re stuck with Silent Circle for $10/month,  which may be a better option, since there is support for more devices, including Android.   It was designed by the guy who designed PGP and handles texting and email, too.

That’s it.

There you are, the whats, whys, and hows of modern, hassle-light, private communications.   Doing what we can to foil bad government programs is our patriotic duty.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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