- @fcn Yahoo Pipes into GReader. 50 news sites filtered to max 50 items/day–all on topic. in reply to fcn #
- @fcn You can filter on keywords, so only the topics you care about come through. in reply to fcn #
- It's a sad day when you find out that your 3 year old can access anything in the house. Sadder when she maces herself with hairspray. #
- 5 sets of 15 pushups to start my day. Only 85 to go! Last 5 weren't as good as first 5. #30DayProject #
- What happens to your leftover money in your flex-spending account? http://su.pr/9xDs6q #
- Enter to Win iPod Touch from @DoughRoller http://tinyurl.com/y8rpyns #DRiPodTouch #
- Arrrgh! 3 year old covered in nail polish. And clothes. And carpet. And sister. #
- Crap. 5 sets of 5 pushups. #30dayproject #
- Woo! My son just got his first pin in a wrestling meet! #
- RT @Doughroller: Check out this site that gives your free credit report AND score without asking for a cc# or social… http://bit.ly/bRhlMz #
- Breaking news! Penicillin cures syphilis, not debt. https://liverealnow.net/KIzE #
- Win a $25 Amazon GC via @suburbandollar RT + Fllw to enter #sd1Yrgvwy Rules -> http://bit.ly/sd1Yrgvwy2 #
- This won't be coming to our house. RT @FMFblog: Wow! Check out the new Monopoly: http://tinyurl.com/ygf2say #
- @ChristianPF is giving away a Flip UltraHD Camcorder – RT to enter to win… http://su.pr/2ZvBZL #
Counting Cards: How to Cheat At Blackjack
I don’t gamble much. I’ve got this boring kind of luck that let’s me gamble for a really long time on not much money, without ever winning big.
For example, when my wife was very pregnant with our first monster, we took a trip to visit my parents. It’s a 2 hour drive, and she needed a break halfway there. In the truck stop, we bought $5 worth of scratch-offs to pass some time. We turned in the winning tickets for more scratch-offs. And again. And again. Two hours later, we were out of winners, but had never accumulated more than $10.
Another time, we went to the casino to play slots. It took nearly 8 hours to spend $20. That sounds boring, but we had good conversation while we were playing.
I’ve never had a big win or a big loss from gambling, so I’ve always been kind of bored with the idea.
Now, cheating at blackjack, that’s a different matter. Pulling one over on the casino without getting caught…they make movies about that kind of stuff.
To be clear: counting cards in your head isn’t cheating. Legally, the worst that can happen is you can be asked to leave. To get a Hollywood-I-cheated-the-casino-and-got-caught-and-beat-by-the-mob kind of beating, you need to win a lot.
A lot.
To get started, there are a few things you need to know. One of those things is how to play blackjack, but I’m not going to get into the basics. If you don’t know how to hit, stand, or count to 21 without taking your clothes off, this guide may be too advanced for you. Come back later.
Super Basic Strategy
You don’t need to count cards to use this strategy. You will do better than most players if you follow along.
1. The dealer must hit, or take another card, if he has 16 points. If he has 17, he stands.
2. The hole card–the card you can’t see–is always worth 10. Of course, it’s not, but for the purposes of your strategy, assume it is.
That means, when the dealer is showing a 2, you’ll assume he’s got 12 points and will hit. If he’s showing a 7, you’ll assume he’s going to stand. If he’s showing an 8, your goal is to beat 18, not push for 21.
That’s it. If you do that, you’ll come within a couple of points of even odds against the house. Google “blackjack basic strategy” if you want to improve this.
Even odds isn’t good enough.
Card Counting
Counting cards sounds tough. Rain Man tough.
It’s not, but you’ll want to practice at home a bit before you try it in the really real world.
The rules are simple:
1. Cards 2-6 are worth 1 point.
2. The 10, jack, queen, king, and ace are worth -1.
3. For every card that is played, keep track of that score. This is a running score across multiple hands until the deck is replaced or shuffled, so don’t stop at a new deal.
4. Divide the running score by the number of decks remaining in the shoe. If there are approximated 150 cards in the dealer-thingy, that’s 3 decks, so divide by 3. If your running score is 18, that means the number your playing against is 6. If the casino is using a continuous-shuffling thingy, forget counting the cards.
That’s it. You’re never adding or subtracting more than a one, and you’re doing that against a number that tends to stay pretty low.
How do you use that, you ask? Easy.
When the score is up, bet higher. If it’s low or negative, bet lower. The higher the number, the higher your bets. If you’ve got a 5, a 6, or more, bet as much as you are comfortable with. If your playing score is low or negative, bet close to the table minimum.
Why does this work?
A higher score indicates that the main assumption of the super basic strategy is more likely to be true. When you’ve got a score of 10, you know a lot of lower-value cards have already hit the table, so it’s safer to assume that the dealer’s card is worth 10.
You don’t change anything about the way you play each hand, you just change the way you bet each hand. Counting cards doesn’t tell you specifically what’s going to happen during each hand, it just tackles the statistics of the game. It moves the odds in your favor, by up to 2 or 3 percent. Over one hand, this won’t help, so don’t sweat losing a hand here and there. Over an entire shoe of hands, you should be able to steadily win more than you lose.
And, as Brian Brushwood says, in the course of your life, very few things make a cooler story than getting kicked out of a casino for counting cards.
Do you play in casinos? Ever tried to cheat?
Christmas Magic
When I was little, the world was amazing. The first snowfall was among the best days of the year. Everything was worth exploring, in hopes of discovering something new and fascinating, and everything was fascinating.
Stepping on a crack had serious implications. The wishbone in a turkey earned its name. Blowing out all of the candles on a birthday cake could change your life. The idea of some dude half a world away, watching you, then sneaking into your house to dish our rewards and punishments wasn’t pervy and sick, it was wonderful.
Then, one day, it all changes.
Somebody–a classmate, a older brother, a neighbor–let’s it slip that Santa isn’t real, and the implications snowball. That day, the magic dies.
Wishing on a star? Over.
The Easter Bunny? Hasenpfeffer.
Growing up to be Superman? Welcome to the rat race.
It’s a sad day when kids stop believing in magic.
I don’t believe in lying to my children, but I also don’t believe in destroying their magic. It’s a balancing act.
When my son was 6, an older boy at daycare tried to kill Santa for him. He was upset.
“Dad, is Santa real?”
“What do you think?”
“I don’t believe in Santa.”
“Okay, I’ll let him know.”
“Nonononononono! Don’t tell him!”
Was it lying? Probably, but he obviously wasn’t ready to stop believing, so I let him continue. A year later, we had the same conversation, but the results were quite different.
“Dad, you’ve always said that you hate lying, so why did you let me believe in Santa?”
So I told him the truth. Magic is a frail thing that’s nearly impossible to reclaim and I wanted him to have that treasure for as long as possible. And, “Now that you know, you are in on the conspiracy. You’ve been drafted. Don’t kill the magic for anyone else.”
It was weird having him help me stuff stockings.
If you’ve got kids(and celebrate Christmas), how do you handle the Santa problem?
Frugally Expensive
I used to do all of my shoe shopping at the big chain farm supply store.
I’d get a pair of black leather boots, because that’s how I roll.
A year later, the sole would be worn out and the leather would be cracking, so I’d go back and give them another $100 for another pair of boots that would last a year.
Year after year.
In December of 2007, I stopped in a Red Wing shoe store. I found a pair of boots similar to what I was replacing, for about $200.
Two years later, one of the side zippers broke, which cost $25 to repair.
A few weeks ago, one of the side zippers broke again. The bottom split, which allowed the zipper to come open (at the bottom) at surprising times.
In Minnesota.
In the winter.
This time, the sole was getting thin. It was still thicker that the brand-new soles of the cheapo boots, but definitely thinner that it should be. The heel was getting run down and the leather was starting to crack.
Time for new boots.
When I went back to the store, I found out that, not only were my boots discontinued, but the price had gone up. It was now $220 for boots I had to tie instead of zip.
Then I looked at the boots. It had hooks for the laces instead of eyelets. I sit Indian-style most of the time, including in my chair at work. The hooks tear up my pants and my chairs.
Grr.
I sent the boots back to the factory to replace the hooks with eyelets for another $25.
That’s $245 for a pair of boots that I should still be wearing in 2016, or $61 per year instead of the $100 per year I was paying before.
Sometimes, you really do get what you pay for.
The Spending Styles of the Rocky Horror Picture Show
- Image via Wikipedia
Everybody has a spending style. Like a fingerprint, it is unique to each individual, even if that individual is fictional.
Since it is the Halloween season, and The Rocky Horror Picture Show is a Halloween movie, I’m going to look at how those characters spend their money.
Janet Weiss – A Heroine
Janet is the stereotype of every suburbanite soccer-mom-who-hasn’t-gotten-married-and-had-kids-yet. She wants to keep up with the Joneses(“It’s nicer than Betty Monroe had! [Oh Brad!]”) and she is obviously impressed by and envious of people who have all of the trappings of the “finer things”. If she has a credit card, you can bet that it is peeling on the sides from over-use. While she wears conservative clothes and sensible shoes to go visit an old mentor, she’s almost definitely got a closet full of fancy shoes and a drawer full of real-baby-seal-skin g-strings. If Brad were smarter, he’d run, and not just because of her loyalty issues. She’ll never be content with a sensible car and modest house.
Brad Majors – A Hero
Brad is a pompous jerk who thinks he’s better than those around him. He’s also extremely conservative and slow to accept change. He’s going to give Janet an allowance and complain every time she spends a penny of it. His investment portfolio is well-balanced and configured for long-term growth and he’s going to rub your nose in it at the neighborhood barbecue. To shut him up, just ask why his kid was born with an accent and garters.
Magenta – A Domestic
What’s a domestic? Magenta is the most financially responsible person in the show. She’s third -in-command of an alien invasion, but still takes on a second job? That’s a woman planning for retirement. She’s not going to rely on anyone to support her. She knows how to enjoy a party, without having to spend all of her money on a glitter-suit.
Columbia – A Groupie (as Little Nell)
Columbia is incapable of making a decision that wasn’t pre-formed by her peer group. She’s doomed to chase every fad, hoping it will impress those around her. While she’ll always be remembered for her glitter-suit or the corset that isn’t quite tall enough, she’ll never be happy or have a spare penny in case of emergencies.
Riff Raff – A Handyman
Riff Raff has jealousy issues. He sees his boss and commander throwing a party and having a good time, but, instead of working towards being able to do that himself, he kills his boss and steals his house. He is greedy, jealous, and deceitful. Don’t ever turn your back on him, or he’ll steal your wallet, hit you over the head and bury you in the backyard just so he can pretend it’s his party.
Eddie – Ex Delivery Boy (as Meatloaf)
Eddie is out of his head (H-E-D). He’s the tag-a-long who will keep buying expensive dinners that he can’t afford in an attempt to impress whoever is around to see him pick up the check. He isn’t sure how to fit in, but he’s positive that he can buy his way there. In reality, he’s dead(spelled right) broke and will end up getting screwed.
Rocky Horror – A Creation
Here is the true blank slate. He’s just seven hours old, so he’s got no bad habits to break. Unfortunately, he’s never had to learn any hard lessons, so his head is easily turned by an glittered bauble or babbling, half-dressed flake. He’s incapable of making an informed decision about anything, so he follows everyone around getting whatever they like. He’ll spend his entire life getting by on his looks, which will almost always be successful, until life catches up to him and he dies broke and alone.
Dr. Frank-N-Furter – A Scientist
Frank knows how to throw a party. He travels 12 billion light years brings not only a keg, but the entire party house with him. Who wouldn’t want to be his friend? There’s a fancy house, a room to stay in if you drink too much, pretty people being built in the lab, and gourmet corn-fed delivery-boy being served for dinner. Watch out, though. He doesn’t tend to his job. One day, the credit cards will be maxed, the bank will foreclose on the house and send it back to Sweet Transexual Transylvania, leaving Frank penniless. Who will be his friend then?
Which Rocky character are you?
Science Fiction
Double Feature.
Frank has built and
Lost his creature.
Darkness has conquered
Brad and Janet.
The servants gone to
A distant planet.
Investing Basics
If you’ve got your debt paid off, or at least paid down enough to start thinking about using your money for the future instead of the past, it’s time to consider investing your money. If you invest your money, it can grow and start building wealth for you, preferably without your active intervention. Passive income is the best income.
Before you invest in anything, you need to understand the investment completely. In the words of Dave Ramsey, you need to own the investment. There are some questions to ask to get to that level of understanding.
What kind of return can you expect? Will the income come from renters, dividends, or interest? Is the income reliable?
How risky is the investment? Generally, more risk comes with the potential for more income, but that is merely potential. It’s called risk for a reason. If your renters leave, can you make the payments on the property? Will you be financially devastated if the investment tanks? Companies like Standard & Poor’s rate the risk of corporate and municipal bonds.
How liquid is it? How hard will it be to get your money out of the investment? Stocks and bonds can usually be sold at will, but CDs and IRAs almost always come with restrictions. Property requires a seller before you can get your money back out.
Is there a tax advantage? Some investments, like U.S. Savings bonds and municipal bonds, are exempt from varying levels of taxes. Others, such as some IRAs, allow your wealth to grow tax-deferred and can, in some cases, be withdrawn tax-free. Other investments, like a 401k paid out of pre-tax income, can lower your taxable income and actually increase your take-home pay while building your retirement fund. Do you understand the 401k alternatives?
When you are looking at an investment vehicle, make sure it is legitimate. Don’t believe get-rich-quick promises and always back away from high-pressure sales tactics. Always take the time to investigate your investments.
