What would your future-you have to say to you?
The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.
What would your future-you have to say to you?
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Holiday weeks are supposed to be short, aren’t they?
I’m 11 days into my 30 Day “Compact”. So far, it has gone well. Unfortunately, there have been a couple of books launched that I’d love to own, and a friend keeps showing me new gadgets that I’d love to get. Not shopping at all is harder than it sounds.
Brian Wood, without a doubt, understood the responsibility he took on as a father. The story makes me get all misty.
On Wise Bread, they asked if you are saving too much. Don’t save as an excuse to stop living your life.
Free Money Finance will help you save money on travel.
Parent Hacks has a great use for a Google Voice number. I have a spare, so I think I’ll start using it.
I’m a big fan of selling on Craigslist. I’ve never sold a car there, so this was informative.
5 Reasons to Quit Saving and Start Living was included in the Carnival of Personal Finance.
Bonding Relationships was in the Carnival of Wealth.
Hippy Month was the Editor’s Pick in the Festival of Frugality!
If I missed a carnival, please let me know. Thanks to those who have included me!
It’s nearly the 5 year anniversary of my last cigarette, so I though I’d bring this post back to the front page.
A bit over three years ago, we found out that my wife was pregnant with baby #3. When we decided to have #2, it took us two years of trying. Naturally, we assumed we’d have the same issues with #3. Imagine our surprise when it only took 2 weeks. At that point, we were getting ready to celebrate brat #2’s first birthday.
That mean’s 2 kids under 2. Two kids in diapers. Three kids in daycare. Baby formula again.
We weren’t making ends meet with two kids, how were we going to manage three? I dropped my pack-or-two-a-day smoking habit.
But, I’ve gone over that before.
This post is about how I actually quit.
I don’t do things by halves; I tend to do things all the way or not at all. For years, my wife would ask me to cut back, to just smoke a little less, but that never worked. If I had cigarettes, I smoked them. I always had cigarettes. When I eat, I eat. I’ve never managed smaller portions. I used to drink a case of soda each week, just because it was there. Moderation has never been my friend.
As a corollary, I don’t cheat. At anything. Ever. Because of the above fact about myself. I don’t moderate myself when I give myself rules either. If I draw a line, I obsessively avoid crossing it.
The problem comes when I try to give myself a “gray area” rule. “Smoke less” always leaves room for “just one more”, which easily leads to “I only cut out one cigarette yesterday, so what’s the use?” I had to be done.
After smoking for fifteen years–more than a pack a day for at least 12 of those–that’s an intimidating thought.
The first thing I did was set a day to quit. I chose the day after my Halloween party. Before that would have been setting myself up for failure. Booze, food, and long conversations in a smoking-friendly environment were just 3 of my many triggers. I always smoked more at my parties, so the day after, I didn’t feel up to smoking much, anyway. I’d just ride that wave of “I don’t feel like it” to to holy city of “I quit”.
I didn’t quit smoking the next day, I just quit buying cigarettes. That left me half a pack to curb my cravings.
I also knew that nicotine cravings are about the most distracting thing I’ve ever had to deal with. That doesn’t make for a productive computer programmer, so I bought a box of the generic patch that Target carries. I started with Phase 2, because I wasn’t interested in prolonging the process. I just didn’t want to spend my work days thinking about smoking instead of designing software. I needed something to take the edge off, without actually smoking.
My plan was to have the patch at work, so I’d be able to work and to stretch those last 10 cigarettes out, as long as possible.
It worked. The pack lasted 4 days, I think. I smoked during my commute and after dinner. I used the patch only when the cravings got to the point that I couldn’t concentrate. After a week, I stopped using it at all. A few days later, I had a particularly stressful day and cheated. I took 3 puffs of that cigarette and threw it away, because it tasted like crap and I wasn’t enjoying it. That’s when I knew I was successfully done smoking. It was a 10 day variation of “cold turkey”. More than 3 years later, I have an occasional cigar, but never due to a craving. The day I experience a nicotine craving is the day I burn my humidor.
That’s how I quite smoking, strictly to try to get my finances in line. That has saved me at least $10,000 over the last 3 years.
This is a guest post from Marc Chase of My Credit Group.
Dealing with a lot of unpaid debt can be a hassle on its own. Having to pay those debts when you don’t even have a job to provide you with the money to do so can be a nightmare. While you’re hunting for a job to help make ends meet, your debts continue to pile up, leaving you scrambling to find a way to take care of them before they cause you to slip further into the poor house, and leave your finances needing credit repair services.
Since you’re likely more concerned about finding a job than anything else, we put together this handy checklist of what you should do to avoid your unpaid bills and debts getting the best of you while you search for a new job.
• Apply for unemployment benefits. This should be your first order of business after you’ve lost your job, especially if you’re one of the many Americans currently living paycheck to paycheck. Unemployment benefits go a long way towards helping consumers stay on top of their bills and credit accounts. Don’t make the mistake of thinking another job is just around the corner – there’s a good chance you can’t afford to wait.
• Keep paying the minimum balance. If you’re on the verge of drowning completely in unpaid debt, you may be tempted to stop paying your bills completely, at least until you get some additional funds in your account. Do this, and you’ll find yourself in need of credit score repair before you even get that call back for a follow-up interview.
Instead, do everything you can to at least pay the minimum balance on all of your credit accounts and bills. This will ensure that your credit history doesn’t take too much of a beating, and saves you from paying even more in interest fees down the line.
• Stop spending money like you have it. Because the sad truth is, while you’re still unemployed, you likely don’t have a lot of money to spare. If you’re still living your life as though you can afford to pay for everything – eating lunch and/or dinner out more than twice a week, generally buying things you don’t NEED – now’s the time to stop.
Stop charging every purchase you make to your credit card – break them out only in an emergency. This will help keep you from sinking further into debt while you’re out looking for a way to pay for your purchases.
• Eliminate and prioritize your bills. Now’s a great time to take a long look at some of the bills you’re paying, and deciding if they’re even worth the service. That doesn’t mean you should stop paying bills you consider “less important” than others; it means looking at some of the things that might have once been necessities (a land phone line if you primarily use a cell phone, a full package TV cable bill, etc.) and re-evaluating your stance on how important they are now that you can’t afford them all. In many cases, you can get in contact with your service provider(s) and talk about ways to reduce your bill (say, cancel cable but keep internet).
This is a guest post from Marc Chase, President of Product Development for My Credit Group, a website dedicated to helping consumers with managing their credit.
If you knew you were going to die tomorrow, what would you do today? How would you spend your last hours? Would you go skydiving before the chance evaporated forever, or would you spend the day talking with your loved ones?
If you knew you would die in a month, what would you do? Would you plan a trip to the one place in the world you’ve always wanted to see? Would you look up all the friends you’ve been too busy to see?
What would you regret? Is there something you have always wished you’d done, but have put off for some reason or another? Do you want to write a novel, or backpack Europe, or watch a shuttle launch? Far more people regret opportunities missed than those they’ve taken. If there is something that you could do that would let you die happy, take steps today to make that a reality. Remember that you are probably not going to die in a day or a month, but don’t let your entire life slip away without doing the things that matter most to you.
Our lives are short. Far too short to waste time on the things that add no value. Everything you do should advance your happiness, either short-term or long. That doesn’t mean you should waste your life pursuing hedonism. Lives need meaning. Chase that meaning.
Find out what gives your life meaning. What do you do that lets you go to bed with a smile on your face? Those are the activities that you should maximize. What is wasting your time? You can probably shut off the news and never miss it. It’s just too much information that doesn’t add anything to your life. Does obsessing over Charlie Sheen’s latest antics ad any value to your life? Take that time and write a screenplay, take a walk, smell a flower, hug your kids, anything that provides actual value for you. Don’t waste your life on meaningless activities that do nothing more than kill time. Time is the one thing we have that we will not get back.
Many people go to their deathbeds thinking, “I wish I had X.” What is your X? What would you wish you had done?
Indio Falconer Downey, the son of actor Robert Downey Jr., was arrested Sunday, June 29, 2014 on drug possession charges. At the time of his arrest, Indio was a passenger in a vehicle that was stopped around 2 PM. At the time of the traffic stop, Indio was found to have what appeared to be cocaine as well as a smoking pipe. He posted bail around 9 PM that evening and was released.
Indio’s father had many well-publicized drug addiction problems throughout the 1990s, attending a number of rehab facilities in an attempt to beat his drug addiction. The 49-year old actor says he was introduced to drugs by his father at the age of eight, and by 20 was a full-fledged addict. Just two years after Indio was born in 1994, the actor was stopped by police driving his Porsche on Sunset Boulevard naked and in possession of cocaine, heroin and a .357 Magnum. Just days before he was due to be charged for those crimes, he was arrested after being found passed out in a neighbor’s home. Indio’s father spent 12 months in prison and, in 2000, when Indio was six, Robert Downey Jr. was arrested in a Palm Springs hotel room with cocaine and wearing a Wonder Woman Costume. Before a preliminary hearing could be held on the charges, Indio’s father was arrested for being under the influence of an undisclosed stimulant. Indio’s mother, Deborah Falconer, divorced his father in 2004.
Indio’s Drug Abuse
According to reports, Indio’s father has been helping his son deal with addiction problems for many years. Indio has been in and out of treatment centers, and some reports say he had remained clean and sober for some time, in some part due to his father’s counseling. In 2013, there were reports that Indio was being treated for a “pill problem,” which his mother claimed was not a significant problem. According to Deborah Falconer, Indio was taking “one pill a day” and that he was not addicted. She said Indio was being treated with “holistic, natural and orthomolecular therapy.” After Indio’s arrest on Sunday, however, Robert thanked the Sheriff’s Department for their intervention, stating that there was a “genetic component to addiction” and that “Indio likely inherited it.” Robert has been clean and sober since late 2001.
Children of Addicts
One of the unknown costs of addiction is that children of addicts are eight times more likely to develop an addiction than those whose parents are not addicts. Many studies have confirmed that addiction is a combination of genetics and poor coping skills. In addition, sons of addicted fathers are four times more at risk for developing an addiction than the sons of non-addicted fathers. Much of this is because addicted parents often lack the ability to provide structure or discipline, and the sons of addicted fathers receive harsher discipline than those of non-addicted fathers. These statistics clearly show that the cost of addiction on offspring is high, and indicates why Indio may have turned to substance abuse.
It is clear that this recent arrest shows that Indio may be facing an escalating drug problem, similar to what his father faced in the 1990s. After seeing his father as an addict, as well as the well-known genetic connection regarding addiction, Indio may need intensive therapy in order to fight his addictions.