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Funeral Costs: How to Keep it Inexpensive, Without Being Cheap

MIAMI - JANUARY 24:  A pallbearer for Poitier ...
Image by Getty Images via @daylife

The average funeral costs $6500.    Many people die with absolutely no savings.   Even if there is life insurance, it takes weeks to get the money, while a funeral is completed within a week.

Funeral homes have an easy sales pitch.  Nobody wants to sully the memory of their loved ones.   The tiniest hint of a guilt trip will have most families upgrading to the silk pillow in a second.   Here’s a secret: Your loved one doesn’t care.  I’m not recommending using garbage bags and a dumpster.   By all means, treat your loved ones with care, but don’t go overboard.

Not everyone is comfortable with cremation, and some religions don’t permit it, but it is probably the least expensive way to process a body.   It costs approximately $1400 to cremate a body and you can get very attractive urns for under $100.  Compare that to a $3500 casket and storage & transportation fees, and–from a strictly monetary standpoint–the choice is clear.

Don’t worry too much about decorating.   Flowers aren’t cheap and florists don’t tend to offer discounts to people who aren’t emotionally prepared to negotiate and who are in a time crunch to find the flowers they need.   Get a few bouquets for a small display around the casket or urn, and let the rest take care of itself.   Many of the guests will bring flowers, so the entrance will soon be decorated for free, and that’s the part that makes the first impression.

Shopping online can save you a lot of money on an urn.  Funeral homes will try to sell you a $500 urn, which may include a 1000% markup.    If you buy online, you will have to pay for overnight shipping, but that’s a small cost compared to the standard markup.  You can also find a huge discount on attractive caskets by shopping outside of the funeral home.   Federal law prohibits funeral homes from requiring that you buy a casket from them or charging you a fee for getting one elsewhere.
This may be the most ghoulish part of this article, but you can dig the grave yourself.   It’s probably not worth it for a full-size casket, but for an urn, you can save hundreds of dollars.   An urn generally only needs to be buried 18 inches deep, as opposed to the 6 feet required for caskets.  Just be sure to check with the cemetery and get the burial location right.  If you think it’s ghoulish to dig the grave, just picture digging it up.  Not fun.
Planning a funeral is never enjoyable, and it’s often expensive.  Nothing you do will make it fun, but it is possible to make it affordable.
Have you had to coordinate a funeral?  Did you take the funeral director’s recommendations, or did you cut some costs?

 

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Three Ways to Make Christmas Cheap

Car off cliff sign
Image via Wikipedia

We failed Christmas Budgeting 101 this year.   I haven’t totaled the damage, yet, but we have spent at least $500 more than we had planned.

It hurt.

Next year, we’re going to handle the Christmas budget differently.   This year’s model isn’t working.   It’s a lot like pushing a car down a hill to get it started, but ignoring the cliff at the bottom.

1.  Use cash.  A huge part of our problem was that Capital One is helping us celebrate.   It’s horrible, because we both know we shouldn’t be using a credit card, for exactly this reason, but we can’t seem to make the transition back away from the plastic.   Part of the reason is that Amazon and ThinkGeek don’t accept cash, and part of it is convenience.    Don’t get me wrong, we’re not carrying a balance on the card, but it’s still far too easy to overspend.

2.  Communicate!  If our gift budget is $500, and I spend $300 online while she’s busy spending $300 in stores, out budget is shot.   Worse, if we spend that money buying stuff for the same people, our budget is shot before our shopping is done.   A little bit of this happened to us this year.

3.  Explore atheism.  There really is no more effective wa

y to cut down holiday expenses than to eliminate the holiday completely.   This may not be the best answer for everyone, but it’s effective.   On the other hand, I know several atheists who celebrate Christmas as much as anyone else.    This probably isn’t a good alternative for most people.

3, Take 2.  Cut back on “stuff”.  My kids have more toys than they can play with.  My kids’ parents have more toys than they can play with.  Do we really need more?   Wouldn’t it be better to spend the money I’d normally use to buy my wife a present on a series of date nights, spread out through the year?   I could take my kids to Feed My Starving Children so they can understand how privileged they are and how much the things they take for granted are really worth.

There are so many other ways to celebrate a holiday that has turned into a national orgy of consumerism.  Next year, we’ll be trying some of the alternatives.

 

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