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Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.

Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?

Me: Yes?

FMe: <Slap!>

Me: May I ask what that was for?

FMe: Of course.

Me: What was that for, jerk?

FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.

Me: What?!? I’ve never even met you, before.

FMe: Of course you have. I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.

Me: Huh?

FMe: Listen close. You’re not the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.

Me: ???

FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.

Me: I don’t appreciate….

FMe: Shut up. I was dumb then, too. Remember? You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year. On top of many other expensive decisions. Do your recall?

Me: Yes, I do. So what?

FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car. Your kids wear new clothes. You’ve got a house full of new furniture. How did you pay for all of that?

Me: Naturally, I charged it. Zero payments, zero interest for a year! Pretty smart, huh?

FMe: What happens in a year?

Me: I don’t know. I’ve got a full year to figure that out.

FMe: <Slap!> I’ll tell you what happens! Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed! Your raise didn’t come through. You had a baby. The truck broke down. Your wife took maternity leave. A roommate moved out. You took a loss in the stock market. You didn’t plan! You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.

Me: How was I to know?

FMe: <Slap!> Life happens! You never know what is coming next. You need to plan and save for what might happen. Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly. That is not acceptable.

Me: So? What are you going to do about it?

FMe: <Slap!>

Me: Really? Again?

FMe: <Slap!> I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help. Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux. My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford. You’ve screwed me, dude.

Me: I’m sorry. What can I do to fix it?

FMe: Buy me dinner, first.

Me: Huh?!?!?

FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change. No credit.

Me: None?

FMe: None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Only spend what you can afford. Budget. Pay off those nasty bills. Don’t leave me hanging.

Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?

FMe: Exactly. That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence. Live in the real world.

Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me! Now I know.

FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

Babies Are Expensive

Finance, Parenting

From the comments here. The discussion is on how much it costs to have a baby. Edited for clarity.

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Actual birthing costs vary. We’ve had three kids over ten years and birthing costs have varied from $250 out of pocket to $8500. Our highest and lowest price births were 20 months apart. The highest price birth involved induced labor with an epidural. For the lowest out-of-pocket price, I added my wife to my policy before the birth, so she was double-covered. If one of your policies is less than ideal and there are multiple policies available, I recommend doing this. It saved us thousands. All told, If things go well, you could slide for as little as $1500 total.

For the highest price birth, we threw ourselves on the mercy of the finance department. They have a charity fund to pay the bills of the less fortunate. We qualified…barely. If you have a medical bill you can’t afford, ask if there is a grant or donation you can apply for. Always ask if there is some way the bill could be lowered.

Breast-feeding beats the heck out of formula, financially, but breast-feeding doesn’t always work. Ignore the boob-nazis who insist you are slowly killing your kid by using formula. I’ve got 3 kids, and each had different feeding issues.

Baby formula runs $19 for a big container at Sam’s Club, or a large percentage of your soul at most other big box stores. Formula alone will pay for your membership in under a month. For a big eater, that’s $20-30 per week. For a normal eater, 2-3 weeks. For planning purposes, assume $100/month in formula costs for the first six months, when food starts coming into play heavily. After that, the formula expense goes down, but not away for at least 6 more months.

Diapers are painful. Not just the smell–though that hurts, too, sometimes–but the expense. I currently have 2 in diapers; one is potty-training. Our monthly costs for diapers, now, are about $75. It was easily twice that when they were younger. Figure at least $100 per month in diapers. Unless your baby has irritation problems, go with cheap diapers. Leak-guard is a joke. If you are relying on leak-guard to keep the contents inside the diaper, you aren’t changing your baby often enough.

I couldn’t begin to guess at how much you’ll spend on baby clothes. I have never bought clothes for our kids. Whatever didn’t come free from friends and family walked into the house of it’s own volition, following my wife home from the store.

Toys are an almost purely voluntary expense. You’ll get as much as the kids needs free, as presents. You’ll go overboard and give the kids 10 times that, without realizing it. Don’t. For the first four to five months, its fingers and toes will be entertaining enough. After that, if there are more than about ten toys, it’s too many; the kid will never get attached to any of them. Keep it small. It’s better for the kids and the budget. Little kids prefer boxes to toys, anyway. Give the kid a shoebox instead of a Leapfrog. Really.

Portraits suck, too. If you have to get them done professionally, get a membership that covers sitting fees, and use coupons. I recommend JC Penney’s. Using judicious coupons and the membership, we get portraits for under $20.

Baby food is probably cheaper to make in a food processor, but you can’t beat the convenience of the little jars. If you watch sales, you can stock up affordably. Mix every meal with some rice or oatmeal mush to stretch it, without making it unhealthy. Depending on your kids, and how much you listen to the “experts”, this is a nonexistent expense before six months. Our kids started eating baby food in their second months, at least a little bit.

Babies are expensive. Don’t doubt that for a second, but ignore the polled averages when it comes to expense. Hand-me-downs, thrift stores, and good sales cut the expense a lot.

How do you save money and value with a baby in the house?

Quality Time – The Best Way to Enjoy Time With Your Kids

Life, Parenting

: Image via Wikipedia

It’s hard to know your kids.

We live in a world of constant distraction. Working full time, chasing the kids to whatever activities they’re enrolled in, play-dates, and other commitments all conspire to chase you away from the one thing that truly matters: your family. It’s not enough to be merely present, you have to be engaged.

How can you carve some time out of your hectic schedule to spend time that your kids will never forget?

We play a lot of games in my family and we start far younger than the recommended ages on any of the games we own. I taught my oldest kid to play chess when he was 4 and he caught on well enough to teach his grandmother within a few months. If a game doesn’t require reading, the recommended age is complete fiction. A two-year-old can count, so Sorry! is a good game. 5-year-olds can add, so Monopoly is a good choice that reinforces math skills.

To keep it fun, we have a few generic rules for playing games.

1. We play for blood. Nobody gets to win a game without earning it. It took my son 5 years to beat me in a game of chess. Two years later, he’s still bragging about it.

2. Losers don’t cry. Sportsmanship is important. It’s no fun to play with someone who throws a tantrum for losing. My son’s friends learned that lesson in a hurry.

3. If you’re not a good winner, you won’t play the next game. We talk a little smack when we play, but it’s only in fun. When someone gets mean, their gaming privileges get suspended.

4. The TV is off. We don’t need more distractions. No TV, no texting, no phone, no nothing. Game time is about family time, not about letting the outside world in. Guard this time with your life. I even hesitate to bring in other friends.

5. Video games don’t count. You get far less interaction when you’re staring at a screen. The goal is to have a good conversation while you’re playing and really get to know your family. You can’t do that when the only words coming out of your mouth are “Ack! Zombie Nazis! Shoot him!”

Board games and card games are relatively inexpensive. Settlers of Catan costs less than a trip to the movies. The games don’t wear out quickly, though we are on our third copy of Phase 10. For the price and the time, you don’t have any excuses.

How do you spend time with your kids?

Lou Reed’s Influence – More Artistic than Financial

Celebrities

On October 27th, 2013, Lou Reed passed away in his Long Island home at the age of 71. A rock and roll pioneer who shaped the American pop culture landscape, Reed was known for his work with both The Velvet

Underground and his solo work. His biggest hit as a solo artist was 1972’s “Walk on the Wild Side,” hailed as a classic by critics and industry veterans.

Reed’s achievements as an artist had less to do with financial or commercial triumphs and far more to do with daring and trailblazing artistry. His most recent work was New Age ambient music, a grand departure from his earlier rock sound. His New Age meditation album, “Hudson River Wind Meditations,” was overlooked by critics but popular with fans of the genre. His final album was 2011’s “Lulu,” a progressive collaborative effort with Metallica. The album was comprised mostly of spoken word.

Reed could have continued to find commercial success and grow his brand and wallet had he continued to create the rock and roll sound that many of his fans desired. However, Reed was nothing if not a rebel, unwilling to bend to the requests of even his most die-hard fans. Ultimately, his passion was to create the sound that he wanted to create – not the sound that others wished he would create.

The lesson that we can all take from the life of Lou Reed is a simple one: While making decisions based on financial and professional factors is undoubtedly important, there is certainly something to be said for throwing caution to the wind and finding one’s bliss. While we all might not be able to eschew doing what we need to do in favor of what we want to do, we could all stand to take some time to do what makes us truly happy and find our bliss. Reed is nothing if not an inspiration for chasing your passion no matter what your critics say.

My First Major Side Hustle

Business

This post was published a year ago as part of Budgets Are Sexy’s Side Hustle series.

On a chilly February day in 2007, I went with a friend to get a permit to carry a pistol. It was partially on a lark, and partially because a right not exercised is a right lost and I am a strong believer in the right to self-defense.

I spent the morning in an overcrowded classroom and the afternoon on an outdoor shooting range when it was -9 degrees Fahrenheit. I was cold numb, but I had the paperwork I needed. As my friend and I slowly thawed out on the drive home, we looked at each other and said “We can do better than that.”

After picking up teaching certifications from the NRA, the Minnesota Dept of Natural Resources, the Minnesota Association of Defensive Firearms Instructors and finally, the Minnesota Bureau of Criminal Apprehension, we started teaching as Metro Defense Training, LLC.

We’ve been doing this for 3 1/2 years, holding one class per month. In the first two and a half years, we taught about 80 people what they needed to know to legally carry a gun. Last year, it exploded. By March, we had made more money than we made in all of 2009. The rest of the year rocked just as hard. We turned ourselves into one of the top 10 training organizations by volume, among a field of 200 competing agencies.

This isn’t a huge market, and it will never make us rich, but it is bringing us a decent chunk of extra cash. It’s made a huge difference on my debt repayment. I don’t include this money on my budget, so every penny I take as pay goes straight to my debt. This has pushed me two whole years ahead of my debt repayment schedule.

What did we do right?

The most important thing we did was to partner with each other. We make a good team. My partner is a natural-born salesman, while I’m an introvert. I couldn’t have built this without him. I am a super-geek, so our technical costs have been nonexistent, aside from a domain and hosting. I’m also a bit obsessive about my passions, so I keep us up to date on any legal issues and developments. He’s working on an MBA and has run small businesses before, giving us valuable knowledge and experience.

We’ve never cut any corners. We give the best possible class we can, no matter what. No extra fees, or sardine-packed students.

We answer questions for our students for years after class. If a student wants a refresher, they can come back for free as often as they’d like.

Word of mouth has been a godsend. The local sheriff–in the most populous county in the state–recommends us when people call. You can’t buy ads like that.

What did we mess up?

Marketing. If a tree falls falls in the business district, does anyone care? If you run a business, put up some ads or fliers and get the word out. No matter how good your business is, you’ll never make a cent if nobody knows about it.

Scheduling. The nice thing about a business like this is the flexibility. We can run a class whenever we’d like. Unfortunately, we forget to schedule the next class until the end of the current class. We could do better. That still leaves a full month’s notice, but some people have to request time off from work far in advance, or do things like going on vacation.

Would I do it again?

Absolutely. We found an accessible niche that serves a need in the community. We’ve turned a passion into a healthy side income, without having to devote full-time labor to it. The buy-in cost was low. It only cost about $1000 and a few weekends to get the equipment and make our training presentation.

It has been an excellent learning experience. I’ve learned a lot about running a business, and I’ve become something of an expert on the related laws. It’s led to my involvement with a non-profit, which has put me in contact with a number of lobbyists and politicians. I’m learning more about how our legal system works than you’ll ever learn watching C-Span and sending letters. Even if the business failed, I’d still be ahead of the game when you count the skills and knowledge I’ve acquired.

The most important thing I’ve learned is that, when you are looking for a side-hustle, you should find something you care about and chase that until it turns into money. Not every hobby or interest can turn into a paycheck, but many can. Ultimately, you have to do something you care about and care about what you do.

5 Ds of Identity Theft

Finance

Scanned image of author's US Social Security card. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Identity theft is, at its most basic level, the act of using someone else’s identity or credit without permission. From a stolen credit card to a forged phone bill in Moscow, it all involves your good money paying for the bad habits of another. Thankfully, there are ways to reduce the odds of having your identity stolen. LTC David Grossman reviews the “5 Ds of Survival” in his seminars and books. Today, I bring you the 5 Ds of Identity Theft.

In the words of the master, “Denial has no survival value.” Denying the possibility of identity theft will not keep it from happening. You have to take steps to keep yourself safe. “It could never happen to me” is not a valid defense mechanism in any situation, financial or otherwise.

Deterrence means keeping the information away from identity thieves. The harder it is for the criminals to get your information, the more likely it is that they will move on to an easier target. And yes, a kid stealing Grandma’s credit card is a criminal and needs to be treated as such.

Some people use a shredder, but not me. I have a fire pit that catches all of my personal documents. I’d like to see an thief get my social security number from the ashes in the bottom of the pit.
Don’t carry your social security card. If you lose your wallet, your driver’s license and social security card contain all of the information needed to steal your identity. Keep it locked up at home and don’t give the number out unless absolutely necessary.
Don’t use stupid passwords. Anything listed on yourFacebook profile or otherwise available on Google in association with your name is a stupid password. Don’t make life easy for the people looking to screw you. Your birthdate, maiden name, and “password” all qualify as stupid passwords. Use KeePass to securely generate and store your passwords.
Lock up your personal information. I throw two large parties every year. Purses and wallets get stored in a locked bedroom, so nobody can grab them. That was a lesson learned the hard way. If there’s someone in your home you don’t trust absolutely, lock up anything that can be used against you.
Don’t release personal information to anyone, for any reason, unless you have initiated the contact. Don’t give a credit card number to a telemarketer. Don’t give a spammer your personal information. It’s your privacy, use it.
Don’t click anything in an email. If it’s a company you have a relationship with, type the address in your browser by hand.

Detection is up to you. Some credit card companies will alert you to suspicious purchases, but you can’t rely on it. I was once called because I went to the gas station and Best Buy, which is apparently a common pattern for a stolen credit card.

Examine your credit card statements. If there’s a purchase you don’t recognize, find out what it is.
Watch for bills to arrive as expected. You do know when you pay the gas bill every month, right?
Watch for unexpected bills to arrive. If you get a statement for a credit card you don’t have, it’s a problem.
Check your credit report three times per year. AnnualCreditReport.com will let you see each of the three major credit reports each year. Space them out so you see your report every 4 months.

Defending your identity happens after you’ve detected a theft. This involves getting your credit and sometimes, your money, back.

File a fraud report with the credit bureaus. This will force potential creditor to follow certain procedures before opening new credit accounts for your identity, including calling your cell phone, if you choose. Stop the identity theft in its tracks.
Close the fraudulent accounts. Don’t leave them open for abuse.
File a police report and report the fraud to the FTC at ftc.gov/idtheft . This may or may not help catch the criminal, but without it, there will never be a punishment. Make stealing your identity an expensive proposition. Hopefully, 1o years of his life will be wasted in jail in return for the theft.

Destroy. Unfortunately, fraud and identity theft are not yet capital crimes. Maybe someday.

Deter, detect, defend. These are the secrets to avoiding, and recovering from, identity theft.

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