- RT @Dave_Champion Obama asks DOJ to look at whether AZ immigration law is constitutional. Odd that he never did that with #Healthcare #tcot #
- RT @wilw: You know, kids, when I was your age, the internet was 80 columns wide and built entirely out of text. #
- RT @BudgetsAreSexy: RT @FinanciallyPoor "The real measure of your wealth is how much you'd be worth if you lost all your money." ~ Unknown #
- Official review of the double-down: Unimpressive. Not enough bacon and soggy breading on the chicken. #
- @FARNOOSH Try Ubertwitter. I haven't found a reason to complain. in reply to FARNOOSH #
- Personal inbox zero! #
- Work email inbox zero! #
- StepUp3D: Lame dancing flick using VomitCam instead or choreography. #
- I approve of the Nightmare remake. #Krueger #
Fighting Fair
This was a guest post on another site early last year.
Everyone, at times, has disagreements. How boring would life be if everyone agreed all of the time? How you handle those disagreements may mean disaster.
This is particularly true when you are arguing with your spouse. You spend most non-working moments with this one person, this wonderful, loving, infuriating person. Your emotions will naturally run high while discussing the things you care most about with the person you care most about. Arguments are not only natural, but inevitable.
How do you have an argument with someone you love without lasting resentment?
You have to argue fairly. There are a few principles to remember during an argument.
- When your partner is talking, your job is to listen with all of your energy. You are not interrupting. Your are not planning your rebuttal while waiting for your turn to talk. Your are listening, nothing else. If you don’t listen, you can’t understand. If you don’t understand, you can’t find a resolution.
- Remember that your partner cares. If she didn’t care, she wouldn’t feel so strongly about the argument. This isn’t a war, just an argument. She still wants to spend the rest of her life with you. Keeping this in mind will change the entire tone of the argument into a positive interaction. You will still disagree, but you will be looking for a solution together, instead of finding a “win” at any cost.
- Search for the best intent. Remember #2? There is an incredibly good chance that, if there are two ways to interpret something your partner has said–a good way and a bad way–your partner probably meant the good way. Even if you are wrong, it is far better to err on the side of resolution than the side of antagonism.
- When your partner has finished speaking, it’s still not your turn to argue. Your job now is to repeat your understanding of the issue, without worrying about problem-solving. Before you can refute the argument–or even establish your disagreement–you have to know that you understand her position and she has to know that you do. Without understanding, there can be no path to resolution that doesn’t cause resentment. If you have too much resentment, you won’t have a marriage.
After all of this, it will finally be your turn to make your point. Hopefully, your partner will be following the same rules so you can solve your problems together, without learning to hate each other.
Arguments in your marriage aren’t–or shouldn’t be–intended to draw blood. Fights happen. If your goal is to win at any cost, you will both lose, possibly everything.
What Can Cause Damage to Your Credit?
Credit scores move up and down as new financial data is collected by the credit bureaus. Many factors can cause a credit score to rise or fall, but most people don’t have a clue what they are. Understanding what affects credit can help keep your number in a good score range, where it should be. But, even a bad score can recover more quickly than most people realize, even after a bankruptcy or default. Here are some factors that can help you understand why credit moves up or down:
Late Payments
About 30% of your score is made up from your payment history. This is comprised from things like credit card bills, auto loan payments, personal loans, and mortgages. At this time, bills like utilities or rent are not factored into your score, unless they are sent to a collection agency. If you are late to pay your credit card bill, it will show up on your credit file. One late payment will probably not have much of an effect, but a history of this over time can drop your score. It is very important to keep bill payment current as a courtesy to creditors and the benefit of your own financial history.
Credit Inquiries
One of the most misunderstood factors that can cause a credit score to drop are “credit inquiries”. An inquiry takes place anytime your credit is checked. This makes up 10% of your total score. What most people don’t know is that there are two different types of credit inquiries, “hard inquiries” and “soft inquires”. Only hard inquiries affect credit and happen when you apply for a new credit card, loan, or mortgage. Soft inquiries on the other hand happen when someone like an employer, landlord, or yourself check your credit report. These are not factored into your credit score at all. Hard inquiries are a necessary part of applying for a loan or credit, so an occasional inquiry will not cause damage. It can only cause problems if there are many hard inquiries in a short period of time. This can be a signal to creditors that you are in financial trouble and are desperately seeking cash.
Credit to Debt Ratio
Your total amount of available credit compared to the amount of credit you use each month, makes up your credit-to-debt ratio. FICO suggests that you use no more than 30% of your available credit before paying off your balance each month. For example if you have $10,000 of available credit spread across 3 different credit cards, the optimal amount to charge would be $3000 or less each month. Maxing out your credit cards can cause your score to drop even if you pay them off completely each month.
Age of Your Credit History
The length of time you have had an open credit account is a major factor of your credit score. It can help to open a credit card when you are younger by getting a co-signer. If you are the parent of a teenager, it may be helpful to open a credit card in their name, but only allow them to use it for emergencies. Having an open credit card in good standing for a long period of time can help build this history. The length of time that you have had credit makes up about 15% of your score.
Different Types of Credit
The last major factor that makes up about 10% of your score comes from the different types of credit that you use. These credit types include revolving, installment, and mortgage. The ability of an individual to successfully handle all of these credit types can show that they are financially well-rounded. This makes up about 10% of the total credit score.
About:
Ross is an investor and website owner.
Transparency
A friend–let’s call him me–recently had a bit of a hangup with a business relationship.
On a long-term project, there were some unavoidable setbacks. My friend decided to work through them, hoping to get everything back up to speed…before the customer noticed.
It’s a funny thing, but customers like to look at status reports on long-term projects. A couple of months after the biggest problem, the customer called my friend wanting an in-person status update. They told him to be prepared for an uncomfortable conversation.
Crap.
Now, the setbacks were truly unavoidable. Things came up that were entirely outside the realm of my friend’s control, but he had to deal with them anyway. When the problems were laid out in front of the customer, it went from uncomfortable to a discussion on how to expand the business relationship.
Transparency for the win.
Bad things happen. Anybody who doubts this is clearly not equipped to deal in the adult (that’s adult in the “grown-up” sense, not adult in the “porn” sense) world. Companies know that bad things can happen to derail a project. They are going to be more interested in how you get the project back on track than anything else.
When things go wrong, be open about it. Your customers/family/friends/one-night-stands will appreciate not having to wonder what’s going on.
Car Dilemma
I’ve got most of my bills set up on auto-pilot, so I don’t have to worry about getting the payments in on time. It’s a huge time saver, but it occasionally comes with a downside.
A couple of weeks ago, I was reviewing our bills and saw this on our insurance statement:
| 2002 FORD | $51.07 |
| 2005 CHRYSLER | $47.40 |
| 1994 MERCURY | $1.64 |
| 2008 DODGE | $39.96 |
| 1986 HONDA — ANNUAL | $17.76 |
There are two problems with this.
1. We sold the 1994 Mercury a few months ago. Then, we forgot to tell the auto insurance company. We probably only wasted $6 on storage insurance, but it could have been worse.
2. We have 2 drivers in the house and 3 vehicles to drive, and the highest premium is on the vehicle getting driven the least.
We haven’t decided what we are going to do, yet.
Here are our needs:
- We have 5 people in our family. My 13-year-old son is bordering on 6 feet tall and shows no sign of not growing.
- Every weekend, we have at least 1 extra kid, sometimes 2.
- We still have a giant(24 foot) boat that we won’t be selling until spring.
- My wife wants to lease a couple of ponies next summer, which will mean a horse trailer to haul them in.
The Dodge is a Caliber, which is small. I don’t fit comfortably in the front seat for a long period of time, and I’ve got no idea how my son manages to fit in the backseat behind me, next to two car seats without complaining. It gets great gas mileage.
The Chrysler is a Pacifica, which fits out family perfectly, as long as there are no extras. It gets crowded with a dog and luggage for a trip, but it’s doable. We get gas mileage higher than the car is rated, but it doesn’t have a towing package. Even if it did, the car can’t handle a trailer full of horse.
The Ford is an F150 we bought new. It’s less roomy in the backseat than the Caliber, but better in the front seat and it can tow anything we need. Also the worst gas mileage of the lot.
The Honda is a motorcycle. I could haul both of the girls if I bungie-strap them to the backrest. Sucks in the winter.
Our choices seem to be:
A. Sell the Caliber. Drive the truck. Not perfect for hauling lots of kids, but it can work.
B. Sell the truck. Drive the Caliber. Screw the horses. (Not literally. Jeez, you have a dirty mind!) This still isn’t great for family outings, but works for a commuter.
C. Sell the truck. Sell the Caliber. Buy a mini-van. We’re looking at the GMC Acadia or the Chevy Traverse. Both are built on the same body, have third row seating that can fit an adult comfortably, and are rated high enough to tow a trailer full of horse. If we sold the car and the truck, and cash out an inherited IRA that has to be cashed out over the next few years anyway, we can come up with $22,000. That will buy a 1-year-old Traverse outright or get us within a few thousand of a similar Acadia.
I think C is the best long-term solution for our family. What do you think?
6 Ways to Stretch a Meal
- Image via Wikipedia
You eat.
Right?
Sometimes, we have more money than month and wonder how we’re going to avoid going hungry at the end of the month. When the grocery budget has run out and the cupboards are almost bare, how do you keep the kids fed?
The secret is to keep some staple stocked all the time. If you have these ingredients, you can stretch $1 of beef into a meal for 10 people. Almost.
Rice
We buy rice 20 pounds at a time. I try to keep a bowl of cooked rice on hand at all times. When we cook a soup, stew, or hotdish, we add a cup or two of rice to the dish. If we’re running late for dinner(a painful situation with a 2-year-old, a 4-year-old, and an 11-year-old who’s about to hit 5′ 7″), we’ll dump a can of soup over the top of a bowl of rice. A quick trip through the microwave, and we’ve got a reasonably healthy meal in 2 minutes. Another trick is to add some to ground beef, whether it’s a meatloaf or sloppy joes.
Beans
This is another ingredient I try to keep on hand, cooked, and in the fridge. We use it like we use the rice. We add a cup to soup, or almost anything else. Throw some barbecue sauce on them, and you’ve got pseudo-baked beans for cheaper than you can buy a can. Mash them with taco seasoning and you have refried beans. Add a cup to scrambled eggs for a filling breakfast.
Potatoes
There are so many ways to use potatoes to stretch a meal. Shred them to cook with eggs or slice them onto a hotdish. Cube them into soup or dice it as a thickener in stew.
Pasta
Yet another item that can go into almost anything. Before I met my wife, I’d make a dish that consisted of nothing more than whatever pasta I had on hand, with a can of soup, cooked until the pasta was done and most of the liquid was absorbed by the noodles. I learned how to wield spices like a crazy Neptunian ninja.
Soup
Whenever we cook, whatever we eat, we make enough for leftovers. When the leftovers are no longer enough to make a meal for anyone, they go in a bag in the freezer. When we have enough, we put them all in a slow-cooker with some water and a ton of seasonings. When we get home from work, we have a delicious soup waiting for us–free soup. If we want stew, we throw in some rice. By the end of the day, the rice has completely dissolved, transforming our delicious freaking soup into yummy dang stew. Everything we make tastes good, so combining a dozen dishes into one soup should also taste good, right? The exception: fish. Never, ever add fish to free soup. Trust me.
Bread
I don’t use bread to cook much, though it’s harder to get much cheaper than a grilled-cheese sandwich. I like to serve a slice of bread with dinner. It just makes the food feel more filling.
That’s how I make a meal for two stretch to feed my family of five, without sacrificing taste or nutrition. How do you make a meal stretch?
