- Uop past midnight. 3am feeding. 5am hurts. Back to bed? #
- Stayed up this morning and watched Terminator:Salvation. AWAKs make for bad plot advancement. #
- Last night, Inglorious Basterds was not what I was expecting. #
- @jeffrosecfp It's a fun time, huh. These few months are payment for the fun months coming, when babies become interactive. 🙂 in reply to jeffrosecfp #
- RT @BSimple: RT @bugeyedguide: When we cling to past experiences we keep giving them energy…and we do not have much energy to spare #
- RT @LivingFrugal: Jan 18, Pizza Soup (GOOOOOD Stuff) http://bit.ly/5rOTuc #budget #money #
- Free Turbotax for low income or active-duty military. http://su.pr/29y30d #
- To most ppl,you're just somebody [from casting] to play the bit part of "Other Office Worker" in the movie of their life http://su.pr/1DYMQZ #
- RT @MoneyCrashers: Money Crashers 2010 New Year Giveaway Bash – $8,300 in Cash and Amazing Prizes http://bt.io/DQHw #
- RT: @flexo: RT @wisebread: Tylenol, Motrin, Rolaids, and Benadryl RECALLED! Check your cabinets: http://bit.ly/4BVJfJ #
- New goal for Feb. 100 pushups in 1 set. Anyone care to join me? #
- RT @BSimple: Your future is created by what you do today, not tomorrow"— Robert Kiyosaki So take action now. #
- RT @hughdeburgh: "Everything you live through helps to make you the person you are now." ~ Sophia Loren #
- Chances of finding winter boots at a thrift store in January? Why do they wear our at the worst time? #
- @LenPenzo Anyone who make something completely idiot proof underestimates the ingenuity of complete idiots. in reply to LenPenzo #
- RT @zappos: "Lots of people want to ride w/ you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus w/ you…" -Oprah Winfrey #
- RT @chrisguillebeau: "The cobra will bite you whether you call it cobra or Mr. Cobra" -Indian Proverb (via @boxofcrayons) #
- RT @SuburbanDollar: I keep track of all my blogging income and expenses using http://outright.com it is free&helps with taxes #savvyblogging #
- Reading: Your Most Frequently Asked Running Questions – Answered http://bit.ly/8panmw via @zen_habits #
Resisting Temptation
This guest post was written as a guest post (by me!) in 2010.
There I was, minding my own business, when suddenly, Sumdood came out came out of nowhere and forced me to buy a new flat-panel TV, a time share in St. Thomas, and join one of those overpriced underwear-of-the-month clubs. Talk about a bad day, rivaled only by the day the odd, lacy package gets delivered on the first of the month.
No, really, as I go about my business each day, the temptation to spend my money can be almost irresistible. Yet somehow, I manage. Is it because I have superhuman willpower? I don’t. Is it because I’m chased by a leather-clad, sjambok-wielding pixie who chastises me for every unbudgeted purchase? That’s not it either, but it makes for a fun picture.
What’s my secret?
I follow a principle I like to call “Don’t buy that!” Don’t buy that! is a simple plan that is surprisingly hard to implement, mostly because following the plan means delaying gratification for a while. Delayed gratification is never as much fun as instantly indulging every whim.
I can hear your shouts of protest. If it’s so hard, how can I expect you to do it? Easy. Just follow the rules. There are a few things you can do to make Don’t buy that! a realistic plan of action for you.
1. Find a slap-me-upside-the-head buddy. I use my wife. It works for me and she tends to enjoy it. If I’m in a store and I get tempted to buy something awesome, I call her for a reality check. Sometimes, it’s as straight-forward as my calling her and saying “Honey, tell me ‘no’.” Other times, she actually has to talk me down using–horror of horrors–logic and reasoning. Usually, she just invokes rule #2.
2. If you have to check if you can afford it, you can’t. If I’m not immediately sure that we have the money to buy something, it is far too big of a purchase to buy on an impulse. Big purchases need to be planned. “Honey, I found this great TV on sale!” “Can we afford it?” “I don’t know, let me che…crap. Nevermind.”
3. You can have anything you want, but you can’t have everything. We could afford a fancy vacation in Paris every year, but not if we also pay for extended super-cable, Netflix, dinner out every night, and a new car every three years. Expenses need to be prioritized.
4. The little things can ruin you. There’s a story about a nail missing from a horse’s shoe, which lamed the horse, which made the knight miss a battle, which was lost, which led to the loss of the war, which led to the loss of the kingdom. For want of a single nail, a nation fell. If I buy a new book or movie every week, will I end up short on my mortgage payment? It’s far easier to pick up some of the little things after the necessities are met than it is to try to pay the mortgage after squandering your paycheck on lottery tickets and Mad Dog. Handle your needs before you worry about your wants. Sometimes, that means putting off the things you want, but having the things you need makes it worthwhile.
5. Remember the past. When I bought a bunch of movies a few months ago, I was happy. New movies go great the the movie screen and projector in my living room. Want to take a guess at how many of those movies I’ve taken the time to watch? I certainly enjoyed the act of buying the movies and the anticipation of watching them far more than I’ve enjoyed seeing them site on the shelf, unopened. What a waste. It happens regularly. Often, we get far more enjoyment out of the idea of doing something that the actual doing. If I can remember that the anticipation is better than the act, before I buy whatever is tempting me, I can usually avoid buying it.
These 5 rules have helped me to follow my master plan of Don’t buy that! That plan is the single most useful thing I have ever used to save money.
What’s your best tip to save money?
New Year Goals
I’m not a fan of New Year’s Resolutions. They are generally drunken promises made on December 31st that are broken by the middle of January, if they are remembered at all. I don’t make resolutions.
My goal for 2010 is to complete one major self-improvement project each month. That’s an entire year of 30-day projects. As each month goes on, I will be updating this blog with the status of each project. Some of the projects will be physical, some will be mental, some will be improvements on my relationships. My goal is to do something meaningful, useful and challenging each month.
Here’s my list:
- January: Wake up at 5am AND read to my kids every night before bed.
- February: Do 100 push-ups at one time by the end of the month. There is also a secret project this month. I’ll be keeping notes and posting in March.
- March: Do 100 sit-ups at one time by the end of the month.
- April: Spring Cleaning. I will declutter every room in my house this month.
- May: Have a sit-down dinner with my family, at the dining room table at least 3 times per week.
- June: No computer use, while anyone else in the family is awake, except for household necessities, such as bills.
- July: Write fiction every day.
- August: Buy nothing new this month.
- September: Attempt to learn a new language. http://ijaar.com/29-free-websites-to-learn-a-new-language/
- October: No yelling at the kids.
- November: No complaining. Not at home, not at work.
- December: I will have done 14 projects this year. December is a month off.
Carnival Roundup
Sorry for the missing “real” post today. My mother-in-law’s funeral is later and the day’s a bit hectic.
Live Real, Now was included in the following carnivals recently:
Yakezie Carnival – Earth Day Edition hosted by The Frugal Toad
Festival of Frugality #334 hosted by This, That and the MBA
Carnival of Money Pros hosted by Money Cone
Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #31 hosted by 101 Centavos
Carnival of Personal Finance #358 hosted by Musings of an Abstract Aucklander
Yakezie Carnival – 4.22 Edition hosted by Faithful with a Few
Financial Carnival for Young Adults #9 hosted by 20’s Finances
Carnival of Money Pros hosted by My Journey to Millions
Thanks for including my posts.
Get More Out of Live Real, Now
There are so many ways you can read and interact with this site.
You can subscribe by RSS and get the posts in your favorite news reader. I prefer Google Reader.
You can subscribe by email and get, not only the posts delivered to your inbox, but occasional giveaways and tidbits not available elsewhere.
You can ‘Like’ LRN on Facebook. Facebook gets more use than Google. It can’t hurt to see what you want where you want.
You can follow LRN on Twitter. This comes with some nearly-instant interaction.
You can send me an email, telling me what you liked, what you didn’t like, or what you’d like to see more(or less) of. I promise to reply to any email that isn’t purely spam.
Have a great weekend!
10 Ways to Secure Your Kids Against Debt
Everybody wants their children to do well. I want my kids to grow up without making my mistakes. Here are a few ways to help them avoid debt.
- Talk to your kids about money. Your kids will never learn how to handle their finances if nobody teaches them how. This is important. The factor that contributes most to stress, divorce, long hours, and unhappiness can’t be left to chance.
- Set a good example. Spend less than you have and let them see you doing it. No matter what you tell your kids, if they see you doing otherwise, they will learn the bad lesson. Money, work, relationships. They all need attention, and your kids are watching you manage each of them. Make them proud.
- Open a savings account for them, and let them fill it. Teach them the value of their money by letting them work for it, watch it accumulate, and spend it on something they care about. I make my kids work to convince me to make a withdrawal, so they know it is only for the important things. I don’t, however, decide what is important for them.
- Start a college fund. $100 or $10, it doesn’t matter. Start putting something aside today. College costs keep rising. In 10 years, or 20, you can be sure that college will cost more than it does today. Last year, nearly two-thirds of students graduating with a four-year degree did so with an average debt of more than $23,000. Anything you can do to move your kids towards the debt-free 35% will help. They will thank you for it for the rest of their lives. Remember, they are in charge of choosing your nursing home.
- Teach delayed gratification. Don’t let them think that every whim needs to be satisfied…ever, let alone immediately. Sometimes, anticipation improves the act. When I am looking forward to a good meal for a few days or weeks, I really savor it when I finally do get the chance to eat it. If they want everything they see, make them figure out what they want most, and what it will take to get it.
- Teach them to balance a checkbook. This is one of life’s basic skills that far too many people are lacking. If you can’t balance your checkbook, how do you know what you have? If you don’t know what you have, how can you know what you’re able to spend on necessities, or even luxuries? Knowing where you are is at least as important as knowing where you are going.
- Give them control of money. This is the best time to learn how to manage money. Give them an allowance and make it big enough to cover school lunch and bus fare. Let them practice real-world skills and, more importantly…
- Let them make mistakes with it. This is their opportunity to make financial mistakes that won’t haunt them for years or decades. Let them have some money and let them screw it up. When they can’t buy the new game, or can’t fix their car, they will learn. It’s better to do that as teenagers living at home than as adults forced to move back home.
- Let them see your pride in their good decisions. If they do well, tell them. Let their endorphin rush come from your praise instead of their purchase. You aren’t helping them by getting them hooked on the latest gadget. You are helping them by making them feel good about making the right decisions.
- Beat them with a stick.
How do you protect your kids’ future finances from the kids themselves?
Festival of Frugality #278: The Pure Peer Pressure Edition

Welcome to the Festival of Frugality #278: The Pure Peer Pressure Edition. If everyone else was jumping off of a cliff, would you do it, too? Maybe not, but what happens if you surround yourself with people who hold the same values as you and are striving for personal growth in the same way? Peer pressure doesn’t have to be negative.
“Peer pressure is not a monolithic force that presses adolescents into the same mold. . . . Adolescents generally choose friend whose values, attitudes, tastes, and families are similar to their own. In short, good kids rarely go bad because of their friends.” – Laurence Steinberg
Shameless plug: If you like what you see, please take a moment to subscribe to Live Real, Now by email or RSS or follow us on Twitter. All your friends are doing it.
Editor’s Picks:
Dinks Finance shows us a few ways to negotiate your mortgage fees. Take a few minutes to read this post before you get a mortgage.
Money Ning reminds us that everyone needs a crappy job early in their working life.
Personal Finance by the Book is leading the fight against the 100,000 mile mindset.
Free Money Finance shows several ways to have fun dates on the cheap. My secret is to make it look “creative” and “unique” instead of “cheap”. You don’t have to cave to the pressure of “expensive” to have a good time.
“Most literature on the culture of adolescence focuses on peer pressure as a negative force. Warnings about the “wrong crowd” read like tornado alerts in parent manuals. . . . It is a relative term that means different things in different places. In Fort Wayne, for example, the wrong crowd meant hanging out with liberal Democrats. In Connecticut, it meant kids who weren’t planning to get a Ph.D. from Yale.” – Mary Kay Blakely
The Best of the Rest:
Budgeting in the Fun Stuff talks about my favorite tax-funded institution: the Library. I’ve easily save thousands of dollars since I started using the library consistently.
Babies are undeniably expensive. Squirrelers provides some tips on limiting the early expenses.
“Don’t think you’re on the right road just because it’s a well-beaten path.” – Author Unknown
Wealth Pilgrim shows how his daughter discover the secret to saving 80% on college costs. The trick isn’t just going to a state school, but what you do when you get there.
ptMoney shares some copy-cat recipe sites. I love making copy-cat meals with better quality ingredients for half the price.
“Every society honors its live conformists, and its dead troublemakers.” – Mignon McLaughlin
Magical Penny recommends tracking your net worth. Mint makes that easy to do.
Smart Wallet talks about going cash-only and the benefits of credit cards. I am currently cash-only, but plan to transition to a good rewards card when all of the debt is gone.
Simple Life in France discusses radical simplicity and frugality in relationships.
“There’s one advantage to being 102. There’s no peer pressure.” – Dennis Wolfberg
I’m a bit of a foodie and more than a bit cheap, so when Not Made of Money talks about creative uses for some we stock up on, I’m listening.
Wanderlust Journey explains the Carnival Cruise loyalty program. I’ve been on exactly one cruise and enjoyed it quite a bit. It’s not the best method of travel for all possible destinations, but I can’t think of a better way to spend a couple of weeks in the Caribbean.
Beating Broke just saved a ton of money by switching to…wait, wrong venue. Read how they saved money on a remodel. Don’t be afraid to use your social capital–the skills of the people who care about you.
“If fifty million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing.” – Anatole France
If you’ve got kids who are planning to play an instrument, you’ll want to pay attention to Budgets are Sexy‘s ideas on saving money on musical instruments.
Free From Broke talks about the hidden costs of home ownership. A home is a never-ending money sink.
“Peer pressure has many redeeming qualities. It is the pressure of our peers, after all, that gives us the support to try things we otherwise wouldn’t have.” – Bill Treasurer
Suburban Dollar explains Swagbucks.
Money Help for Christians shares some tips to save money. I particularly enjoyed the coupon walk-through link.
Provident Planning talks about someone living happily on $7000 per year. I can’t imagine making it on that.
A “Normal” person is the sort of person that might be designed by a committee. You know, “Each person puts in a pretty color and it comes out gray.” – Alan Sherman
Final plug: If you enjoyed yourself, don’t forget to subscribe to Live Real, Now by email or RSS or follow us on Twitter. All your friends are doing it. The coolest ones are even fans of LRN on Facebook.