- Bad. My 3yr old knows how the Nationwide commercial ends…including the agent's name. Too much TV. #
- RT @MoneyCrashers: Money Crashers 2010 New Year Giveaway Bash – $9,100 in Cash and Amazing Prizes http://bt.io/DZMa #
- Watching the horrible offspring of Rube Goldberg and the Grim Reaper: The Final Destination. #
- Here's hoping the franchise is dead: #TheFinalDestination #
- Wow. Win7 has the ability to auto-hibernate in the middle of installing updates. So much for doing that when I leave for the day. #
- This is horribly true: Spending Other People's Money by @thefinancebuff http://is.gd/75Xv2 #
- RT @hughdeburgh: "You can end half your troubles immediately by no longer permitting people to tell you what you want." ~ Vernon Howard #
- RT @BSimple: The most important thing about goals is having one. Geoffry F. Abert #
- RT @fcn: "You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life." — Winston Churchill #
- RT @FrugalYankee: FRUGAL TIP: Who knew? Cold water & salt will get rid of onion smell on hands. More @ http://bit.ly/WkZsm #
- Please take a moment and vote for me. (4 Ways to Flog the Inner Impulse Shopper) http://su.pr/2flOLY #
- RT @mymoneyshrugged: #SOTU 2011 budget freeze "like announcing a diet after winning a pie-eating contest" (Michael Steel). (via @LesLafave) #
- RT @FrugalBonVivant: $2 – $25 gift certificates from Restaurant.com (promo code BONUS) http://bit.ly/9mMjLR #
- A fully-skilled clone would be helpful this week. #
- @krystalatwork What do you value more, the groom's friendship or the bride's lack of it?Her feelings won't change if you stay home.His might in reply to krystalatwork #
- I ♥ RetailMeNot.com – simply retweet for the chance to win an Apple iPad from @retailmenot – http://bit.ly/retailmenot #
- Did a baseline test for February's 30 Day Project: 20 pushups in a set. Not great, but not terrible. Only need to add 80 to that nxt month #
The Unfrugal Meal
I spend a lot of time talking about how to save money here. It’s kind of what I do.
Not today.
Today, I’m going to talk about the best way I’ve wasted money during my vacation this week.
First, so my feelings are completely understood: A vacation is about experiences and memories. I could spend all day at the park with my kids, or I could spend a memorable meal with them. Which will they remember longer?
It ain’t the park. They are there almost every day.
Of course, if the restaurant is McDonald’s they wouldn’t remember for long, either.
Tuesday, after a long day of hands-on, interactive museum-going, we took the kids to a Japanese steakhouse. Teppanyaki, where they cook the food at the table, complete with fire, spatula spinning, and airborne food.
I’m the only one in my family who has seen that before. Honestly, watching the art, the skill, the banter, and the giant fireball leaves me as wide-eyed as my kids.
They loved it.
Watching the chef throw a bowl full of rice across the table made my son’s jaw drop.
Seeing the chef carry fire from one side of the grill to the other on his fingers made my youngest squeal and beg for more fire tricks.
Getting squirted by the chef when he was putting out a flare-up made the middle brat giggle, possibly because the squirt gun was a little kid, dressed up as a fireman, with his pants down. She got “peed” on and loved it.
Aside from cooking-as-a-show, the service was fantastic. There was always a waiter nearby to keep our water glasses full or to provide “little kid” chopsticks, which are modified with rubber band to remove the need for skill to eat. They had the courses perfectly timed. The minute the salad was cleared, the soup was delivered. When that was done, the chef rolled up to start on the rice. My two-year-old was eating white rice without complaint for the first time.
Giggles and squeals. Three days later, they are still talking about it. My 11-year-old, who’s trying so hard to be an unimpressible teenager, says it was the coolest restaurant he’s ever seen.
Frugal, it wasn’t, but the memories were worth the money.
Make Extra Money Part 1: Introduction
Today, I’m re-launching a new series on how I make extra money online. This series fell off my radar for a while. I intend to finish it now.
Right now, I have 7 sites promoting specific products, or “niche” sites. When those products are bought through my sites, I get a commission, ranging from 40-75%. Of those sites, 5 make money, 1 is newly finished, and 1 is not quite complete. I’m not going to pretend I’m making retirement-level money on these sites, but I am making enough money to make it worthwhile.
Over the course of the series, I’m going to show you how to take advantage of multi-million dollar market research to choose a niche, at no cost to you. You’ll see how I choose a domain name, where to find products to sell, and how to promote your new site.
As I write the series, you’ll get to see exactly what is working, as it’s happening. I’ll be choosing the niche as I write the post on choosing a niche. As of this writing, I don’t know what niche I’ll be promoting, what product I’ll be using, or what keywords I’ll be targeting. This will be a live, totally transparent case study of how I make extra money.
Before we get started, I need you to understand a few things.
First, this is not overnight money. My first niche site took 6 months before it made me a penny. That was partially because my product selection research was faulty, but also because these things do take time. I’ll show you how to pick a niche and product that won’t take that long, but you can’t expect to quit your job tomorrow.
Second, this is work. Once everything is established and optimized, it won’t be a lot of work, but it will take time to do. There is no such thing as “set it and forget it” internet marketing. Anybody who tells you otherwise is selling you something you won’t be satisfied with.
Third, this isn’t free. I’m not going to charge you anything, but some parts of this will cost money to do effectively. I’m not a fan of throwing money away, so I won’t be suggesting anything outrageous. If I do recommend something that costs money, I will try to recommend a free or very cheap alternative, but that won’t always be possible. I started out slow and cheap, but now, when I launch a site, I spend some money to do it quickly and effectively. I am a fan of paying others to do the things I dislike doing.
That’s the plan. I’m going to tell you how I make extra money online, and I’m going to let you look over my shoulder while I set up my next site, start to finish.
Any questions?
Any comments on how you make extra money online?
Toxic People
You should never be in the company of anyone with whom you would not want to die.
-Duncan Idaho, from God-Emperor of Dune
Some people suck the life out of everyone they encounter. Whether it be through lies, unreasonable demands, emotional abuse or manipulation, or just a vile personalty, the people they meet are worse off for the encounter. The people they interact with every day are screwed.
My time is too precious to waste any of it unnecessarily on people who remove value from it. I like being with people who enrich my life, instead.
Unfortunately, since I’m not an advocate for the use of hitmen, not every toxic person is easy to eliminate from your life.
Toxic people come in 3 basic varieties: professional, personal, and family. There is some overlap between the categories.
The personal category is easiest to deal with. These people aren’t relatives or coworkers, so you won’t see them at family gatherings or at work. I’ve dealt with these people in two ways.
First, there is the direct approach. One former friend, who was really only a friend when it was convenient for him(a pure leech), got told that he wasn’t invited to one of our parties because I was inviting his ex-wife, instead. That was the last time he called me.
The second option is far more passive. I set up a contact group in my phone called “Life’s too short”. At first, I set it up with a fairly insulting ring tone, but I later switched it to no ring at all. I don’t know they’ve called until I check my voicemail. It’s far less direct, but also far easier than the direct approach.
Dealing with the toxic people in your family is more complicated. You’ll see them at holiday gatherings, or hear about them during unrelated visits. You probably have a lot of memories growing up with them, and may feel some level of obligation–deserved or not–to maintain contact. It’s hard to break a tie that you’ve had your entire life.
Can you fix their behavior? It’s worth trying to have a frank discussion about how they are treating you, or the things they are doing. If the problem is that they are constantly bringing over their methhead boyfriends, banning the drug addicts from your home, while still welcoming the relative may be an acceptable fix. If the problem is a constant need to belittle you, demanding they stop may work. If the problem is a lifetime of emotional abuse, it probably isn’t fixable.
Is banishment an option? Can you put that creepy cousin on the Life’s Too Short list? You’ll still have to deal with him at family gatherings, but you can always leave the room when he comes in, right? Don’t engage, don’t participate in any conversation beyond a polite greeting, and don’t offer any encouragement towards regular contact.
It’s possible that it won’t be possible to fix their behavior and that you won’t want to banish the offender. If, for example, the offender is your mother (Not you, Mom!), you may feel a sense of obligation to maintain contact, or even be a primary caregiver at times. This is a line nobody else can draw for you. At some point, the current bad behavior could overwhelm the past obligations. When that happens are you prepared for it? That can be a traumatic break.
The other option, as cold as it sounds, is to wait it out. Nature will take its course, eventually. Can you wait that long, while maintaining your sanity and emotional equilibrium?
Professional toxic people include customers, vendors, and coworkers, none of whom are easy to get rid of.
If you own the business, you can fire your problem customers if the hassle outweighs the benefits you get from the relationship. You can find a new vendor, and you can fire the problem employees.
What happens if you are an employee?
If the problem is your boss, your options are to suck it up, talk to his boss, or find a new job. If the first is intolerable, and the second is impossible, it’s time to polish your resume.
If the problem is a vendor, you’ve got some options. Document the problems, first. Does he make inappropriate jokes, or badmouth you to your customers? Then, research the alternatives. Does one of his competitors offer an equivalent product or service? Take the documentation and research to your boss, or whoever makes that decision, and see if you can get your company to make the switch. The other option, is to request someone new to deal with at the vendor’s company, but that may not always be possible.
Finally, we come to the problem of toxic coworkers.
Some coworkers have the same problems as a toxic boss. Is the company vice-president the boss’s baby brother? You’re probably not going to find a win there. You’ll have to suck it up or move on.
Is the problem person working in an unrelated department doing unrelated tasks? It may be possible to start taking breaks at different times and leave him where he belongs: in the past.
Is the difficult individual sharing an office with you, demanding everything be done his way, and throwing daily tantrums? This is the one that has to be dealt with. He’s the one sucking the life out of you every single day.
First, start making use of a voice recorder. If you’ve got a smartphone, you’ve probably already got one. Otherwise, drop the $20 to buy one. This lets you document the evil. When his behavior goes hinky, record it.
Second, stand up for yourself. If he’s making unreasonable demands, tell him it’s inappropriate. He’s a bully, and bullies tend to back down when they are confronted.
Third, make sure the boss knows about the behavior. Yes, this is tattling. Get over it. If he wasn’t acting like he was a spoiled 4 year old, you wouldn’t have to tell the boss that he was. If the boss doesn’t know there’s a problem, he can’t deal with it.
Fourth, for any problem that isn’t directly aimed at you, ignore it. If he makes a habit of throwing a tantrum because somebody emptied the coffee pot, or because the company switched health plans, let him. Only get in the way if it’s directed at you. Over time, the tantrums will get more noticeable and out of hand, forcing the boss to deal with it, preferably by handing him a pink slip.
Your goal is documentation, awareness, and avoidance. Make the worst of it go elsewhere so you can be as productive as possible, document what you can, and let the boss become aware of the situation and how bad it has become. And be patient. This isn’t an overnight fix.
How do you deal with the toxic people in your life?
Fixing Your Credit Report
Sometimes, negative things appear on your credit report. Usually, they do a good job of maintaining
Credit card (Photo credit: Wikipedia)accuracy, but mistakes do happen. The creditor or the reporting agency may screw up, or you may have your identity stolen. If either of these situations are true, you’ll want to correct your credit report, making yourself eligible for lower rates on future credit and, occasionally, lowering the cost of things like auto insurance.
If you throw “credit repair” into Google, you get 18 million hits. Most of those are either outright scams or hopelessly optimistic about what they can accomplish. As I said once before:
Credit Repair is almost always a scam. There are ways to get correct bad information removed from your credit report. If the information is correct, those methods are illegal. There are two legal methods to repair your credit. First, stop generating bad credit. Make your payments on time and eventually, the bad items will fall off. Second, write letters disputing the actual incorrect items on your credit report. There are no quick fixes, and anybody telling you different is flirting with a jail sentence, possibly yours.
There are ways to avoid the scammers.
- Avoid advance-fee credit repair. If they are any good, you will pay for results, not intentions. If they charge beforehand, they are already breaking the law.
- If they insist they can erase the accurate, but negative information, run away.
- If they tell you to dispute everything negative, even the accurate information, run away.
- If they tell you to create a new credit identity, don’t just run, report them. It’s a felony.
Legally, you cannot get valid information removed from your credit report. Anyone who tells you differently is advocating a crime. However, according to the Fair Credit Reporting Act (FCRA), you are entitled dispute incorrect records.
To verify the accuracy of your credit report, you need to see it. You can get a free report if your credit is used to deny you for something. This is known as an “adverse action” . You have 60 days from the denial to request the report. You can also get one free report from each of the major credit bureaus each year. I space out these requests so I see my credit report every 4 months.
If there is inaccurate information on your report, dispute it in writing. Send a letter to the credit bureau that is reporting the error. Explain the problem and politely demand an investigation. They will contact the creditor, who usually has 30 days to respond. In the meantime, send a dispute letter to the creditor, along with proof of the inaccuracy. If the investigation does not go your way, the creditor will have to report the dispute status to the credit bureaus in the future.
If the negative items are accurate, there is only one way to get it off of your report legally: Wait. Most negative information can only be reported for 7 years, while a bankruptcy will be reported for 10.
Another way to build your credit in the face of negative credit is to start building good credit to overshadow the bad. Get a credit card. Your first credit card from the bottom of the debt-barrel will probably be a gas card or a store-branded credit card. That’s fine. The main consideration is are low or nonexistent fees. Don’t accept application fees, activation fees, fees for carrying a balance or fees for not carrying a balance. Annual fees are becoming a fact of life, so look for low fees. The interest rate does not matter. You will be paying this card off immediately, meaning no less often that every two weeks. Make sure every penny is paid during the grace period, and make sure your card comes with a grace period. Some don’t. Those are bad cards to get.
There are no quick fixes for bad credit, just good new habits and time.
I just turned 2!
Update: Over $500 in prizes!
Yesterday was my second anniversary here. For the last two years, I have shared my thoughts, feelings, and finances three times a week and you have been there to watch and share as I figure out my financial future.
I appreciate it.
To show my appreciation, I’m giving stuff away.
Here are the prizes:
1 $100 prize
1 $75 prize
6 $25 prizes, courtesy of ThirtySixMonths, Budgeting in the Fun Stuff, Maximizing Money, Personal Finance Whiz, and Broke Professionals.
1 iPod Shuffle courtesy of Prairie Eco-Thrifter.
1 $25 Amazon gift card courtesy of Beating Broke.
A copy of each of the iPhone and iPad versions of the Pay Off Debt app from The Debt Myth
1 $20 Amazon gift card, courtesy of Money Crush.
1 $25 Starbuck’s gift card, courtesy of Mom’s Plans.
I’m also giving away some books, some of which have been lightly read.
Financial Peace Revisited by Dave Ramsey
Never Pay Retail by Sid Kirchheimer
Delivering Happiness (advanced reader copy) by Tony Hsieh
I Will Teach You To Be Rich by Ramit Sethi
The Art of Non-Conformity by Chris Guillebeau
CreditCards.com Book of Cartoons
Women & Money by Suze Orman
To enter:
Follow the instuctions in the widget below. Following me on Facebook, Twitter, RSS, or email will all earn entries. Following any of the sponsors on Twitter of Facebook will earn you entries. Tweeting about the giveaway as often as you like or linking to this page on your site will earn you entries.
There are lots of ways to enter and 16 prizes to win.
The drawing will be held on December 23rd, just in time to give you some cash before Christmas.
Good luck!