What would your future-you have to say to you?
The no-pants guide to spending, saving, and thriving in the real world.
What would your future-you have to say to you?
I work daily to raise my kids to be more financially responsible than I have been. One of the most difficult pieces has been to explain the benefits of delayed gratification to my children. It’s hard enough, as an adult, to take delayed gratification to heart. For a child? It seems to be almost impossible.
My son wants an XBox 360 Elite. Good for him. He wants to renegotiate the terms of his allowance to get it faster. Currently, every other time he gets an allowance paid out, it goes into his bank account, to be mostly untouched. The other times he can do as he pleases with his money. We are enforcing a 50% long term savings plan. Now, with a medium-term goal in mind, he wants to keep all of his money, and only put gift money into the bank account.
Should we let him tap his bank account for a shiny new bauble? It’s been building for a while, so it’s delayed, right? I don’t think that would accomplish much. Like any other 10-year-old, his interests change often.
Should we let him change the terms of our agreement, speeding a medium-term goal at the expense of his long-term savings? My wife and I haven’t had a chance to discuss this, but my initial reaction is not to allow it. His savings has the potential to turn into a decent car in a few years, if he wants. That would be a car he knows he earned.
Last week, when we were at the store, he asked if he could borrow some money to buy a game. I don’t expect him to carry his money around everywhere, so I would have allowed it, if he would have had the money at home. He didn’t. His plan was to pay me what he did have as soon as we got home, then work his butt off for a few days to earn enough extra to pay it back. I won’t be a credit agency for my kids, so I said no. He was disappointed, but, by the time he had earned the money, he no longer wanted the game. I consider that a win, but I don’t know that he learned any lesson other than “Dad’s a jerk.”
Someday, when his life launch is smooth due to a lack of debt-dependence, he’ll look back on these lessons and smile.
I hope.
Debt can be thought of as a disease–probably social. Most of the time, it was acquired through poor decision making, possibly while competing with your friends, occasionally after having a few too many, often as an ego boost. Unfortunately, you can’t make it go away with a simple shot of penicillin. It takes work, commitment and dedication. Here are three steps to treating this particular affliction.
1. Burn it, bash it, torch it, toss it, disinfect. Get rid of the things that enable you to accumulate debt. If you keep using debt as debt, you will never have it all paid off. That’s like only taking 3 days of a 10 day antibiotic. Do you really want that itchy rash bloodsucking debt rearing its ugly head when you’ve got an important destination for your money? Take steps to protect yourself. Wrap that debt up and keep it away.
2. Quit buying stuff. Chances are, you have enough stuff. Do you really need that Tusken Raider bobble-head or the brushed titanium spork? They may make you feel better in the short term, but after breakfast, what have you gained? A fleeting memory, a bit of cleanup, and an odd ache that you can’t quite explain to your friends. Only buy the stuff you need, and make it things you will keep forever. If you do need to indulge, hold off for 30 days to see if it’s really worthwhile. If it’s really worth having, you can scratch that itch in a month with far fewer regrets.
3. Spend less. This is the obvious one. The simple one. The one that makes breaking a heroin addiction look like a cake-walk(My apologies to recovering heroin addicts. If you’re to the point that personal finance is important to you, you’ve come a long way. Congratulations!). Cut your bills, increase your income. Do whatever it takes to lower your bottom line and raise your top line. Call your utilities. If they are going to take your money, make them work for it. If they can’t buy you drinks or lower your payments, get them out of your life. There’s almost always an alternative. Don’t be afraid to banish your toxic payments. Eliminate your debt payments. This page has a useful guide to debt and how to clear it off.
Update: This post has been included in the Festival of Frugality.
Just some quick carnival links today.
What Can Cause Damage to Your Credit? was included in the Totally Money Carnival.
Financial Blogger Conference was included in the Festival of Frugality.
53 Percent was included in the Best of Money Carnival.
Winning the Mortgage Game was in the Totally Money Carnival.
Thank you! If I missed anyone, please let me know.
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You can send me an email, telling me what you liked, what you didn’t like, or what you’d like to see more(or less) of. I promise to reply to any email that isn’t purely spam.
Have a great week!
Live Real, Now was included in four carnivals recently:
Yakezie Carnival – Daytona Edition at Not Made of Money
Totally Money Carnival #56 at Afford Anything
Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #22 at My University Money
Carnival of Financial Planning – Edition #225 at Beating Broke
Yakezie Carnival – Dr. Seuss Lorax Edition at Miss Wallstreet
Canadian Finance Carnival #77 at Canadian Finance Blog
Carnival of Financial Camaraderie #23 at Canadian Finance blog
Thanks to all of the hosts for including my posts.
You can subscribe by RSS and get the posts in your favorite news reader. I prefer Google Reader.
You can subscribe by email and get, not only the posts delivered to your inbox, but occasional giveaways and tidbits not available elsewhere.
You can ‘Like’ LRN on Facebook. Facebook gets more use than Google. It can’t hurt to see what you want where you want.
You can follow LRN on Twitter. This comes with some nearly-instant interaction.
You can send me an email, telling me what you liked, what you didn’t like, or what you’d like to see more(or less) of. I promise to reply to any email that isn’t purely spam.
Have a great week!
In April of 2009, I told my wife we were either going to straighten out our finances or file bankruptcy. At that time, we had $90,394 in total debt, including $30,000 in credit card debt. It hasn’t been easy, but we are working out way out of that hole. Since then, we have paid down more than $30,000. That’s not $30,000 in payments, but $30,000 less debt. We are now less than $60,000 in debt. We have entirely stopped accumulating more and I don’t remember the last time we carried a new balance on a card or had to use our overdraft protection. Next month, my car will be paid off, 10 months early.
Given my new-found fanaticism, I spent the next 6 months or so evangelizing about our debt repayment. Eventually, I decided to share my thoughts and progress with the world and launched this site on December 1, 2009. Today is my anniversary.
Here we are, 234 posts, 695 comments, and 17, 661 spam later. You all rock. Except the spammers.
To say thank you, I’m giving away a $100 Amazon gift card to some lucky reader. Yes, I rock, too.
There are several ways you can enter the drawing:
1. Subscribe to Live Real, Now, either by RSS or email. If you are already subscribed by email, you are automatically entered. To show me you have subscribed by RSS, there is a contest code in the feed. Just post that in the comments. (1 entry)
2. Follow me on twitter and tweet the following: “@LiveRealNow is giving away $100. Come get some! Follow and RT to enter! http://bit.ly/f1roKM #Giveaway #Yakezie” (1 entry possible per day. Every day you retweet this is another entry!)
3. “Like” LRN on Facebook. This is easy, just click the little ‘like’ button on the left. If you’ve already done that, you have already entered once.(1 entry)
4. Send me an email at Jason <AT> LiveRealNow <DOT> net telling me what you would like to see me write about more (or less!). You can also use the contact form. (1 entry)
I’m closing this down on the 15th. That’s 18 possible entries for $100 you may win early enough to help with some last-minute Christmas shopping.
UPDATE:
And the winner is…Claudia! Congratulations. Email sent.