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Don’t Screw Future-You

Finance, Life

A conversation between me and my temporally displaced self.

Future Me: Excuse me, Jason?

Me: Yes?

FMe: <Slap!>

Me: May I ask what that was for?

FMe: Of course.

Me: What was that for, jerk?

FMe: That was payback for all of the hell you have put me through.

Me: What?!? I’ve never even met you, before.

FMe: Of course you have. I am future-you, and I’m sick of getting screwed by past-me, that is, you.

Me: Huh?

FMe: Listen close. You’re not the sharpest brick in the box and I don’t want to explain this twice.

Me: ???

FMe: A long time ago, when you first met our wife, you were dumb.

Me: I don’t appreciate….

FMe: Shut up. I was dumb then, too. Remember? You…err…we bought a new truck, built an addition on our…err…your…err…whomever’s house, got married in the same year. On top of many other expensive decisions. Do your recall?

Me: Yes, I do. So what?

FMe: If that wasn’t enough, you and your smoking-hot bride are still shopping like you’re rich. You drive a new car. Your kids wear new clothes. You’ve got a house full of new furniture. How did you pay for all of that?

Me: Naturally, I charged it. Zero payments, zero interest for a year! Pretty smart, huh?

FMe: What happens in a year?

Me: I don’t know. I’ve got a full year to figure that out.

FMe: <Slap!> I’ll tell you what happens! Future-you, that’s me, gets screwed! Your raise didn’t come through. You had a baby. The truck broke down. Your wife took maternity leave. A roommate moved out. You took a loss in the stock market. You didn’t plan! You had no savings to cover any of those problems because you were too busy servicing debt to pay for your current life.

Me: How was I to know?

FMe: <Slap!> Life happens! You never know what is coming next. You need to plan and save for what might happen. Otherwise, you’ll just accumulate more debt to be serviced by yours-truly. That is not acceptable.

Me: So? What are you going to do about it?

FMe: <Slap!>

Me: Really? Again?

FMe: <Slap!> I’m struggling to pay your debt. Your son starts college next year, but you’ve left me completely unable to help. Your daughter wants to get married in a couple of years, but the Father-of-the-Bride can’t afford a tux. My wife, your beatiful bride, wants a vacation that I can’t afford. You’ve screwed me, dude.

Me: I’m sorry. What can I do to fix it?

FMe: Buy me dinner, first.

Me: Huh?!?!?

FMe: Stop the excess spending. Spend less than you make, for a change. No credit.

Me: None?

FMe: None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. Only spend what you can afford. Budget. Pay off those nasty bills. Don’t leave me hanging.

Me: So, what you’re saying is that, if I don’t have the money, I shouldn’t buy it?

FMe: Exactly. That’s the path to wealth, freedom, and financial independence. Live in the real world.

Me: Gee, thanks, Future-Me! Now I know.

FMe: And knowing is half the battle.

What would your future-you have to say to you?

Avoiding the Downside of Saving

Finance, Life

Like all good silver linings, saving often comes with a storm cloud. Too often, people fall into the trap of forgetting to live while they are digging out of debt. Once you get into the habit of spending every spare cent to pay down debt, retirement, or a college fund, it gets easy to ignore the present in favor of the future. The downside–or potential downside–to saving, debt repayment, and frugality is a deferred life. Whether it’s deferred fun, deferred education, or deferred personal development, it can be detrimental to you and your relationships.

My wife and I have had this conversation. We’re in the groove on our debt repayment. We are making excellent progress right now. Since we’ve got it all automated, it leaves us time to plan, dream and consider our options. We’ve been looking at converting a hobby into a business venture. Doing so will involve a $1-2000 investment. If we can make it work, my wife will be able to quit her tolerable, comfortable, soul-sucking job within a couple of years. If we can’t, she will still have moved her hobby into an advanced–and more fun–level. That’s a win either way, but our initial reaction is to postpone. We already know we’ll have to postpone the purchases until we’ve saved for it, because we refuse debt in all forms. Our initial reaction has been to postpone saving, effectively deferring development with long-term potential to improve our lives until our debt is completely gone.

We’ve been discussing this, off and on, for months. We have finally decided to start saving, but only when we have money that is purely extra and we’ve tucked money into all of our other savings goals. It’s not a perfect solution, but it seems to be an acceptable compromise given our situation and values.

Regardless of your situation, it is important to remember not to defer your life while you tackle your debt or savings goals.

Update: This post has been included in the Carnival of Personal Finance.

10 Top Tips for Reducing Household Expenses

Finance

Regardless of the economic climate, it is always a savvy move to assess your expenditure and look for ways to cut your energy costs. Small changes can make a big difference to your energy efficiency and reduce your outgoings significantly.

1. Know Your Accurate Energy Usage

Do not pay for estimated resources. Using a smart meter will tell your exact energy consumption and means you simply pay for your actual confirmed gas usage. So many customers are unknowingly trapped into paying for estimated energy, which can be very costly.

2. Secure an Suitable Tariff

Once you have established your actual gas and electric consumption using a smart meter, speak your energy supplier regarding the various available tariffs.

There are over 120 tariffs available for energy in the UK and there is definitely one to suit all households. Being more assertive in this area can save you money instantly.

3. Let There Be (Energy Efficient) Light

Lighting accounts for up to 40 per cent of our individual electricity bills.

Change light bulbs to energy saving bulbs for a progressive way of reducing your energy expenses. As energy efficient bulbs last ten times longer than normal high-watt bulbs, any cost in making this switch will be quickly recuperated.

Although many days in the UK are dismal, cleaning windows and opening blinds means that rooms can generally be lit with natural light.

4. Don’t Tumble Dry

Tumble drying your clothes is one of the most financially and environmentally expensive appliance usages. Though energy efficient products are now available, try to make use of any other means you have for drying clothes.

During the winter months, fill indoor clothing racks and radiators within items to be dried. Summer washing is generally less of a problem, with warmer temperatures meaning you can hang loads of washing outside to dry naturally.

5. Switch Off Electrical Equipment

Turning your electronic equipment off at night can cause impressive yearly reductions in your expenditure. Encourage the family to turn all laptops, consoles and computers off during the night, and unplug phone chargers when not in use.

Simply switching off a computer overnight saves £35 on the cost of running the equipment 24 hours over the course of a year. Once you have factored in the number of computers and other electronic equipment in your home, this could amount to quite a saving.

6. Moderate Your Heating

Turn your heating down by just one degree. Such an unnoticeable alteration to your thermostat holds the potential to cut your energy bills by a whopping £55 per year.

Enhance your savings by becoming more energy efficient. Rather than switching on heating and cooling systems, use doors and windows to regulate temperature.

7. Invest In Energy Saving Appliances

Most appliances on the market now offer detailed insight into their environmental impact. Buying eco-friendly products not only benefits the climate, it also benefits your pocket. The lower the amount of energy the appliances consume always equals lower energy bills for your household.

8. Reduce Water Waste

A dripping tap can cost up to £400 per year. Paying out for plumbing services now will definitely save on your water bill.

Rather than bathing daily, swap alternate baths for showers. Showers typically use 35 litres of water, whereas baths take more than double this amount at 80 litre of water per tub. Though this varies depending on the type of your shower, according to South Staffs Water, power showers still save approximately 20 litres on the average bath.

9. Replace Your Old Boiler

If your home currently uses an old G-rated boiler, of 15 years of age or more, then you may find that investing in a new A-rated boiler will save you money long term.

Gas burning boilers eat energy and money and are a costly way of fuelling your home. The government currently offers £400 to those who are looking to purchase a new energy efficient boiler, with companies such as British Gas doubling this grant.

10. Insulate Your Home

Alongside grants for new A-rated boilers, companies are being encouraged by the government to offer discounted (and free) loft and wall cavity insulation. Take the time to see if you are eligible for this as it can make your home significantly warmer, reducing your reliance on central heating.

Be assertive to how you are using resources within your home, small changes can make a big ecological and economic difference.

This is a guest post.

Halloween Decorations Ain’t Cheap

Finance

This year, Americans are expected to drop $5.8 billion on Halloween, with most people spending $66.28 per person. About 1/3 of that is candy.

The rest? Costumes and decorations. $4,000,000,000 on costumes and decorations. That’s a lot of freakin’ money.

Over the years, I have certainly spent more than my fair share on building that number. We are the Halloween house in our neighborhood. A few years ago, we were even featured on the evening news. Filling a yard with decorations is expensive. When money’s tight, or you just want to save some money, how can you decorate on the cheap?

1. Plan ahead. The best time to buy Halloween decorations is in the two weeks after Halloween. After that, all of the seasonal stores are closed. If you want the best selection, get up early on November 1st and hit all of the stores. Prices drop to 50% or lower the morning after the big day, but won’t drop below that, even when the seasonal stores are closing for the year. The goods will either be warehoused or bought back by the suppliers, so there’s no motivation to sell at cost.

2. Buy used. You can find some screaming deals on Craigslist, but always check the prices. I’ve seen cardboard and wooden coffins both going for $50. One is a good deal, one is a ripoff. Do some research and you can save a ton of money on some really neat pieces. Last year, a local haunt decided to close shop after Halloween and posted a “going out of business” sale on Craigslist. There were some excellent gory corpses for sale there.

3. DIY. When department stores close, you can buy mannequins for little-to-nothing. Throw some clothes and mask on that, and you’ve got a quick monster. Grave stones can be made by gluing two sheets of insulation styrofoam together and using a Dremel to shape it and add the epitaph. Make sure you brush paint it. Spraypaint will eat the foam away. Finally, if you can run a drill, you can cobble together some truly intense props with the aid of some monster mud and discarded lumber. Monster mud is made by mixing 1 gallon of latex paint with 5 gallons of sheetrock compound. I get a gallon of paint from the “oops” bin at the hardware store, preferably in a dark color. Dip some clothes in that, then put them on a a human-shaped frame built out of 2×2 lumber, and you have something not too disimilar from actual Hollywood props.

Over the years, I’ve managed to shrink my Halloween budget, while increasing the quality of my props. It just takes some time and research.

Charity Scams

Finance

: Image by Emery Co Photo via Flickr

‘Tis the season to give away your stuff.

As Christmas rolls in, it’s common to see people ringing bells for charity outside of stores, or knocking on doors asking for your help with their pet causes. Phone and mail solicitations are up. You’ve got your pockets open and everybody’s hoping for some cash.

Good for you. Charity is wonderful.

I openly treat charity as the selfish act it truly is. Donating my time and money to causes I support makes me feel good about myself. I like feeling good about myself. The other reasons people give to charity are A) to make people like them, or B) to receive tax deductions. That’s it. There are 3 possible reasons to donate: to like yourself, to make others like you, or to save some tax money. I thought about adding guilt to the list, but that is covered by some blend of the first two reasons.

How can you know that the charity you are donating to is worth it? There are a ton of evil bastards out there trying to cash in on your desire to feel good. They want your money because rolling around naked in ill-gotten gains is what makes them feel good. Naked scammers sprawled across my cash isn’t a visual that makes me feel good.

Wait, you say? People use charities for cons, you ask? In 2005, The National Arthritis Association was busted for convincing people that it was somehow related to The Arthritis Foundation, when in reality, it was using the money for hookers and blow. Or something decidedly not arthritis-cure-related. If a charity sounds like something you know, but isn’t quite there, check into it before you donate.

It’s also common for scammers to run a phone campaign, pretending to be the Red Cross, the Salvation Army, or United Way. Those are all good charities, but they don’t benefit from the good intentions of the victims. The scammers just want the credit card information. Once they have that, it’s off to Rio for a crazy week of xxxxxx on a xxxxxx with a xxxxxxx for xxxxxx. (Editor’s note: This is a family-friendly blog.) Don’t give out your credit card information to anyone over the phone. Ever. Tell the caller to send you something in the mail, or promise to visit their website. But don’t give them the keys to your cash.

How can you avoid funding a Nigerian coup that will surely end in the downfall of the righteous king, causing all of his heirs to email me(as the only trustworthy person in the world) to help move the nation’s fortune out of the country in exchange for a mere 10% of the loot? I mean, how can you be sure you are donating to a good organization?

The easiest way is to ask the IRS. You can call them at 877-829-5500 or visit their website at http://www.irs.gov/charities/article/0,,id=96136,00.html to search for charities that have actually filed with the IRS. Not all charities have filed. Some state-based nonprofits don’t bother, but you can check with your Secretary of State to verify their status.

Always pay by check or credit card. Cash is untraceable. If a charity turns out to be a scam, leaving a trail makes it easier to prosecute.

Don’t give in to the guilt-tactics. If a charity is worth giving to today, it will be worth it tomorrow, too. There’s no rush. If the solicitor is trying to rush you, it’s probably a scam.

Remember, it’s your money. Take care of it.

What are your favorite charities?

Girls Don’t Fart

Finance, Life

A few years ago, I was playing a game a friend was developing. As part of the setup he asked me to tell him something I believed as a child but now knew not to be true. My answer? Girls don’t fart.

When I was at summer camp one year, a camp counselor gave me that glorious and confusing bit of knowledge. He sounded serious and I was young, with no sisters. Naturally, this entered my personal Canon of Life’s Facts. Over the next few years, I’d get into arguments with my friends that went something like “I don’t care if you have 10 sisters! You don’t know what you’re talking about!” Yes, I could be a little jerk. I don’t think that misconception was actually cleared up until high school. It’s not that I actively believed it, but I had no reason to think about it. That was just the way it was. Girls certainly didn’t fart around me.

I’m married with three kids, two of which are beautiful(and gassy!) little girls. A belief doesn’t get more shattered than this one.

Now, some 25 years later, I find myself occasionally running into other beliefs that I’ve seemingly always had, but have no reason to keep. These are–or were–part of my personal Canon. Once accepted, even if they were only accepted implicitly, they have been unexamined and unquestioned. It’s just the way it is.

For many years, I thought debt was normal. Everybody had payments. Everybody used credit cards. Everybody lived beyond their means. Right? No. The reality is that it’s not everybody, and the people who are living beyond their means are living a broken system. Normal is spending actual money for things you can actually afford. Normal is not paying for the use of someone else’s money. Everything else is dysfunctional.

Another Canonical Misconception was that money could take care of itself. I didn’t know anybody with a budget. The closest anybody came was the “balance available” line on an ATM receipt. Couple this with an unquestioning acceptance of debt, and it’s no wonder how I ended buried under my credit cards. Having a budget is important. Knowing where your money has gone and where it is supposed to go is important. Without this, you’ll never be in control of your finances.

I’ve often thought that you get what you pay for. Assuming that more money somehow causes something to be of better quality or utility is dangerously expensive. There is a level that means something is so cheap it can’t possibly be worthwhile, but there is a huge spectrum of quality above the garbage price point. There is also a line above which no manufacturing can improve the cost and you are paying strictly for the brand or the ego boost. In today’s world, with stores and manufactures all around the world just a click away, it’s easier than ever to find a good deal for a good price.

These are just a few of the ideas I’ve held without question until they were shattered suddenly. Now, I try to examine my beliefs and make sure they still make sense in the face of my current knowledge and experience.

What Canonical Misconceptions have you overcome?

This post is a blast from the past. It ran a couple of years ago and I think it’s worth reviving.

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