My wife and daughters are active in a saddle club, even though we don’t own any horses. We’ve been borrowing them for shows when my girls compete.
My wife’s cousin has been trying to sell one of her horses for a few months. Because this horse has alpha-male problems, it has to be kept in a stall. Stall boarding runs $450 per month as opposed to $200 in a group paddock.
Since my girls love this horse, Cousin continually tries to convince my wife to buy it.
My wife’s response is “Jason won’t let me buy a horse, yet.” Then all of her friends get to complain about how I’m not supportive.
Uhhh, no.
We are $10,000 away from paying off truck. We’re $23,000 away from being mortgage-free. After that, we’re planning to rent out the house we’re in and buy a hobby farm.
Yes, Mr. Unsupportive is planning to uproot everything and move to the country so my wife and daughters can have horses on site.
Shame on me. I’m such a jerk.
In a couple of years, I want to buy a $450,000 spread on about a dozen acres and let my wife’s dreams come true.
Or, we could buy a couple of horses now and never have the money for a down payment.
Or, we could buy the farm now, buy the horses now, spend every last cent of our savings on a down payment, spend more than half of our income on our mortgage payment, never get ahead, and end up losing everything.
Such a jerk.
This is a case where we have to do everything in the right order, or it will all come tumbling down on our heads in a few years. If I have to be the bad guy to avoid screwing ourselves later, so be it.
I hear you loud and clear. I look at some of the end goals and my wife is looking at wants along the way, and I’m definitely the ‘cheapskate’ when those things don’t line up and I put my foot down. Stay the course, I think your wife and family will see the benefit down the road, it’s just hard to see that far ahead when you have something available right now.
The problem is your wife’s response. She needs to not put the onus on you but rather on your joint goals.
Someone has to be the bad guy. You are planning everything out in the right order. Have you sat down with your wife and explained the big picture and how the plan has to happen in a specific order for it to happen at all?
Even though you look so ‘unsupportive’ outside Jason, your family knows that you care.. All of the other people will see that soon. 😉
I’ll give your wife the benefit of the doubt – she probably didn’t really think about her wording since she knows your overall goals. I think you are the sane guy (at least in this situation, lol) that has ultimate goals to get to. Good luck!
Not a jerk, you’re the Hero. Hang in there and don’t succumb to “The Look”.